Just Out of Curiosity
by PurpleLover92
Summary: Spencer begins to question her sexuality, so she enters a lesbian chat room for answers. What happens when she starts talking to the head cheerleader at her school unknowingly?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: ****This is my first fan fic that I am writing by myself. My girlfriend and I are almost finished with a fic called You're The One under our shared account beccniya. Everyone should check it out. Ok I hope you like this, enjoy!**

**Disclaimer:**** I don't own South of Nowhere or any of the characters.**

"How's your schedule looking this year?" Chelsea asks me as we walk towards the quad.

"I don't even want to talk about it." I reply.

"That bad, huh?"

"Chels, I have gym! I hate gym, it's so pointless!" I yell as I flop down on a table, Chelsea soon following me.

"Well you could have been taken it freshmen year, but no you had to put it off until senior year. That's your fault, Spence." She's so right.

"I was hoping that they changed the graduation requirements. I mean, we are in high school not elementary school, we should not be forced to take it!"

"Yea yea, I've heard this rant many times before. You have to take it so just quit the whining."

"I hate you, you know that?" I give her a dirty look.

"You are only saying that because you know I'm right. I know you love me!" She said sticking her tongue out at me.

"Rigggghhhtt, I'll let you think that." Then the bell rings. "What do you have first period?" I ask grabbing my bag and standing up.

"Advanced Art, you?" Chelsea replied walking towards the Fine Arts building.

"AP Bio, yay!" Sarcasm dripping through my words.

"That's your fault yet again Spence. You are the one that signed up for all AP classes. Hell I bet if there was an AP Gym course, you would take it!" She laughed.

"That's so not true! You make me sound like a nerd!" I slap her arm.

"Well if the shoe fits…"

"I hate you, bye Chels."

"See you at lunch, Spence!" She yelled as I walked towards the science building.

I can't believe it's only fourth period and I already have a shit load of homework! What kind of teacher gives homework on the first day of school? Chelsea was right, maybe I shouldn't have signed up for all of these AP classes, but then mom would be pissed. I hate being so good all of the time. I am knocked out of my thoughts when I bump into someone. I look up and notice it's one of the cheerleaders. I mutter a quick "Sorry." "No problem" She replies and walks in the opposite direction and I can't help but stare. I shake my head to knock myself out of my daze and head to the quad for lunch. That was weird.

I make my way over to an empty lunch table and put my head in my arms. It's only the first day and I am already feeling the stress, and I haven't even been to all of my classes yet. I'm glad gym is the last class of the day.

"If you're dead, I want your car." I hear. I look up to see Chelsea taking a seat next to me. I notice a shorter girl with long dark hair standing next to her. She's cute. Wait what? That's normal to say a random girl is cute right? Whatever.

"Unfortunately, I'm still alive, so keep your paws off my baby!" I yell.

"Damn, wishful thinking." She sits across from me pulling out her lunch.

"I should go buy some food." The unknown girl says.

"No you don't want to do that. I would suggest you bring your own food from now on, that shit that they call food is gross." We laugh. "Here you can share mine today." Chelsea says to still unknown girl. That's weird, Chelsea is not nice to anyone she just meets. Hell she threatened me when we first met.

"Hi, I'm Spencer." I say giving her my hand to shake.

"Hey I'm Carmen. I'm new here." She says shaking my hand. Hmm nice and soft. There are those thoughts again.

"I'm so sorry for you." I say, we laugh.

"It can't be that bad here, right?" Carmen says taking a bite of the sandwich Chelsea gave her.

"King High is just your typical high school, you know dumb jocks, bitchy cheerleaders, different cliques, and don't get me started on rumors."

"You know, your brother is one of those dumb jocks that you were talking about." Chelsea adds.

"And your point is…"

"Uh he's your brother?"

"So you dated him. I don't have a choice, you did." I said with a smirk.

"Ugh don't remind me. I have no idea what I was thinking by dating Glen." Chelsea said rolling her eyes.

"That was so awkward."

"Why?" Carmen asks raising her eyebrow. That's hot.

"Have you ever had your best friend date one of your siblings?" I wait for a response. None. "Exactly."

"It wasn't that bad, Spence." Chelsea says laughing.

"Right, anyways changing the subject. What classes do you have after lunch? Please tell me we have a class together, at least one." I plead.

"I have AP Lit after lunch then my last class is Calc."

"Yay we have Lit together, why don't you skip Calc and come to gym with me, please?" I give her a pout.

"Sorry I actually need to pass my classes. You will just have to go to gym alone. It's not that bad."

"Whatever you're just saying that because you don't have to take it." I stick my tongue out at her. The bell rings and we head to class.

After Lit, I walk to gym extremely slow. I really don't want to do this. Why couldn't I just take this online or something? Because you dimwit, that would be pointless.

I finally make my way to the locker rooms. Holy shit, half naked girls everywhere. I cover my eyes and make my way over to any empty area. I glance around and I notice that a lot of these girls have done some serious tanning. Lexi must have been running a lot because those calf muscles are a lot more defined. Damn, looks like Sarah got a boob job over summer. Oh well the bigger the better. Since when have I thought that? I sound like Glen. This is not happening.

I quickly change and head to the basketball court. The coach split us into teams so we can start a game. I guess I can work on my game so that I can finally beat Glen.

Throughout the game, I notice how every girls' boobs bounce when they run, dribble, or shoot the ball. It's so fucking hot, and I am so wet. When coach tells us to hit the showers, I tense up. I ran to the showers, hoping I would be the first one in and first one out. No such luck. I see some of the other girls already undressing and I can't seem to look away. I shake my head to stop my staring for the second time today. What is up with me? Maybe it's waking up at the crack of dawn after going to sleep at three a.m. God I hate school.

I quickly shower, although I did steal a few glances at the other girls. I'm just curious, right?

After the bell rings, I rush to my car. I knew taking gym was a bad idea. As I'm waiting to get out of the parking lot, I notice Glen and Aiden surrounded by cheerleaders. Ugh whores, I don't know what they see in each other. How can two dumb people function in a relationship? Beats me.

Throughout my whole drive home, I can't help but think about what happened today. First it was staring at that cheerleader's ass, then it was calling Carmen hot, and finally the cherry topper, was checking out the girls in the locker room. Fuck, am I… No I can't be… How do you know if you're…? I can't even say it. This is bad.

I ignore my thoughts and head into the house. As I head in the kitchen I notice my mom sitting at the table reading the newspaper. She would shit bricks if I was…

"Hey sweetie how was your first day of school?" she questions like she really cares.

"Boring, my classes are hard and I have a ton of homework."

"You know you have to take those classes so you can get into the top colleges."

"Yes I know, mom. I'm going in my room to start my homework." I leave before she can reply. She really irritates me sometimes. I feel like she's trying to live her life through me. Ugh bitch.

Unlike most teenagers, I actually do my homework when I say I am. But as I am trying to read the chapter about reproduction, my mind wanders back to the girls at gym. I have never noticed how developed some of those girls are. What is going on with me?

I decide that the only way I will find out, is if I do a little research to get some answers. I open my laptop. Google is very resourceful. I search 'How do you know if you are gay?' I saw a few sites that said something along the lines of 'Are you not happy with your child being gay?' That would be for Paula. Then I saw 'Hot gay porn!' I don't think I'm there yet.

Then I decide that if I really want to know for sure, why not go to the source. I then Google search 'Lesbian chat rooms.'

I clicked on the first link. Here goes nothing…

**Thanks for reading. Please let me know what you think and if I should continue or not.**


	2. Chapter 2

The top of the page said 'Gay Dating' with a rainbow flag. I love rainbows, they are so pretty. The homepage was set up so that newbies, like me, could create a profile. I created my profile but decided not to put a picture up. I don't want to end up having some creepy stalker finding me or using my picture for weird things. I decided to go with the username SLC823. After creating my profile, I checked out the website. There were a lot of different chat rooms to choose from. I decided to enter the one that said 'L.A. Teens' this should be interesting.

The next screen was a chat room. There were hundreds of people there, and it seemed like they were all posting something at once, it was hard to keep up. Every time I tried to read what someone wrote, it would skip to the next line, so I just gave up. I decided to write something and hope that someone would IM me. I typed in '17 year old gay curious female looking for someone to talk to.' That should work, right?

A second later I received an IM. I squealed and opened it.

'**SexySammy36**: Hey sexy, wanna trade pics?' Uh how about no? I just exited the box and went back to the chat room.

I then made a second attempt to read what everyone was saying. Once again, no luck. Another IM, I wonder what it will say this time.

'**LittleLady2:** Hey babe, I can teach you a few tricks.' I'll pass. Back to the chat room it is.

This time I didn't even try to read any post, instead I just re-wrote my first statement. Hopefully this time I will get someone that actually wants to talk.

'**CutiePie69**: My pussy is wet and waiting for you.' Wow, forward much? Goodbye. I think at some point I will think that if someone told me that, I would be really turned on, but as a first impression, I'm extremely turned off.

I don't think I will get what I'm looking for in this chat room if this is what I will get. Just as I was about to exit the entire chat room, an IM popped up.

'**LAbabe4u:** On a scale from Lindsey Lohan to Ellen DeGeneres, how gay do you think you are?' This is a different approach and funny, I guess I'll give it a try.

**SLC823:** Hmm that's tough; I think I'm an Oprah.

**LAbabe4u: **So Oprah, is there a Gayle that you have your eye on?

**SLC823:** At the moment no, I'm not sure if I'm into any Gayles. That's why I'm on here.

**LAbabe4u:** Oh right, I almost forgot that you said that you were 'gay-curious.' People usually use the term bi-curious

**SLC823:** I like to be different.

**LAbabe4u:** I see and I like.

**SLC823:** Oh yea? Why's that?

**LAbabe4u:** I hate when people try too hard to fit in. But I guess I'm the last one that should talk.

**SLC823:** Why do you say that? Are you like some fake preppy cheerleader or something?

**LAbabe4u:** I am not fake or preppy?

**SLC823:** You're a cheerleader? As in pom pom holding, short skirt wearing cheerleader?

**LAbabe4u:** The one and only. Head Cheerleader to be exact.

**SLC823:** Oh wow. I've never heard of a gay cheerleader before.

**LAbabe4u:** What makes you think I'm gay?

**SLC823:** Well you were in a lesbian chat room soooo…

**LAbabe4u:** Maybe I just like to talk to people on here.

**SLC823:** Maybe but I doubt it. I think you are gay.

**LAbabe4u:** Are you trying to tell me that your gaydar is working through IM, Oprah?

**SLC823:** I guess so… I would add your name but you never told me.

**LAbabe4u:** You can call me Gayle if you want.

**SLC823:** LOL ok so Gayle, are you gay?

**LAbabe4u:** Very much so.

**SLC823:** I knew it! So what is it like being a gay cheerleader?

**LAbabe4u: ** Well since no one really knows, I'm not any different than the other cheerleaders. But the plus side of being a gay cheerleader is that I get to check out the other cheerleaders while we practice.

**SLC823:** That's always a good thing. Why aren't you out?

**L.4:** I just don't want to deal with the high school drama that goes along with it. It's my last year so I don't have to worry about hiding for much longer.

**SLC823:** What about your girlfriend or past girlfriends? Don't they want to be out and show everyone that they are with you?

**LAbabe4u:** I've never really had a girlfriend; I just hook up with people. And I have a 'boyfriend' just for cover.

**SLC823:** Oh you are very interesting, Gayle. Why do you put quotes around boyfriend?

**LAbabe4u:** Because we just date as a cover, we are both gay.

**SLC823**: And I thought your story couldn't get any more complicated.

**LAbabe4u:** Yea it gets complicated at times, but I do it to avoid drama.

**SLC823**: What girls do you hook up with if no one knows you're gay?

**LAbabe4u:** I go to gay clubs in different towns.

**SLC823:** How do you get in, I thought you were in high school?

**LAbabe4u:** I am. I just turned 18 recently but my ID says that I'm 21.

**SLC823:** You seem to think of everything. Very smart.

**LAbabe4u:** Do you like smart girls?

**SLC823:** I would prefer if they were somewhat intelligent. What about you, what type of girls do you like?

**LAbabe4u:** Honestly, I don't really have a type. They just have to be hot. But if I had to choose by looks, I would say that I'm more attracted to blondes.

**SLC823:** You're in luck. I happen to be an all American blonde haired, blue eyed girl. ;)

**LAbabe4u:** I guess today is my lucky day.

"Spencer dinner is ready!" My dad yelled from downstairs. Really, now?

"Coming!" I yelled back.

**SLC823:** I have to go eat dinner. I'll talk to you later, hopefully.

**LAbabe4u:** Yea I like talking to you, Oprah.

**SLC823:** Me too. Later.

I added LAbabe4u to my friends list because I don't want to have to try and find her again. I hope she accepts. Something about her really intrigues me.

I rushed through dinner, just so that I could get to my room and talk to 'Gayle'. It's weird, I already like this girl, and I don't even know her real name.

Unfortunately, when I got back to my room she wasn't online anymore. But she did accept my friend request so that's a plus. I decided to check out her profile before I got off. I noticed that she didn't have a picture either. That could mean that she thinks like me and doesn't want creepy people using her pictures, or she is just hiding because she is still in the closet. I wonder what people will think if they knew I liked a girl? My mom would freak, Glen would probably challenge me to see who will get the most girls, and my dad is the only one who I have no idea about. I have so much to think about. I do know one thing for sure; I am into girls, well at least one.

**A/N: I know this is short, but I wanted to get something out there now. I hope you are enjoying it so far. If you have any questions or suggestions or anything, let me know. You can always send me a private message or something. Let me know if you like it! Thanks for the reviews and the alerts, they make me smile**!


	3. Chapter 3

**In my last chapter for some reason the the username LAbabe4u came up as L.4u. But I changed it for this chapter so L.4u is LAbabe4u! Enjoy!**

The next day I woke up to the incessant ringing of my alarm clock at the crack of dawn yet again. I hardly got any sleep last night. Surprisingly, it wasn't from staying up and doing homework, no it was Gayle, aka LAbabe4u. I just couldn't stop thinking about her. I wonder how she looks. Does she have a nice smile? What color are her eyes and hair? I hope she gets on again tonight. I just want to get to school already, so that I can get the day over with. The sooner school is over; the sooner I can get home and talk to her.

After getting ready, I went downstairs for breakfast. I heard the shower running on my way downstairs. I'm so happy Glen and I have our own cars, if we had to share I would be late every day.

As I pull up to school, my smile still stays in place. I've been smiling since I started talking to her and I haven't stopped since.

"It seems like you're in a good mood today." Chelsea says as she walks up beside me.

I sat down on a table in the quad. "I am in a good mood."

"And why is that?" Chelsea asks sitting next to me.

"No reason, just happy." I smile at her.

"I'm glad you're happy. How did gym go for you yesterday?" I turned away as I hide my blush from her because of the thoughts I had during gym yesterday.

"Actually it wasn't that bad. I'm kinda looking forward to it today."

"I never thought I would hear you of all people say that."

"Well believe it. Gym is not as bad as I thought it would be."

"I'm glad you like so I don't have to hear you bitching about it all semester long."

"Haha very funny, you are such a great friend." I stick my tongue out at her.

"I'm the best." She says just as the bell rings.

"Right, I'll see you at lunch." I stood up and walked towards my class.

I made it through my first four classes even though I barely paid attention in any class. I still couldn't get LAbabe4u off of my mind. And once again she is on my mind, so naturally I'm not paying attention to where I'm going. As I'm walking toward the quad, I bump into someone again. And believe it or not it's the same cheerleader from yesterday, what are the odds of that? "Sorry" I muttered again. "No problem" she said looking at me for a minute longer than necessary. I wonder if that's… no it can't be. I mean there has to be thousands of cheerleaders in L.A. I forced my gaze away from her and kept walking towards the quad.

I notice Chelsea and Carmen already waiting at the table, sitting oddly close. I wonder why Chelsea is being so nice to her. I guess everyone is changing.

"Hey Chels, hi Carmen." I say as I sit down.

They shifted away from each other a little. "Hi Spencer." Carmen greeted me.

"Hey Spence, how has your day been so far?" Chelsea asks before biting into her sandwich.

"Pretty good, hey do you know all of the cheerleaders?" I ask taking out my lunch.

"Yea kinda, I was pretty much forced to hang around them when I was dating Glen." Chelsea says laughing at the memory.

"Do you know which one has curly brown hair with red bangs, brown eyes, a nice tan, and is a little shorter than me?" I ask giving a description of the girl I bumped into in the hallway two days in a row.

"Umm…I'm pretty sure that's Ashley Davies. She's the captain who's dating Aiden Dennison. Why?"

"No reason. She just doesn't seem like the other cheerbitches. I bumped into her yesterday and today and she didn't yell like I know the others would have."

"Yea she is pretty cool. She's the only one that really tried to make me feel welcomed whenever I did hang out with them."

"Oh."

"Are you talking about Raife Davies daughter, Ashley?" Carmen asks.

"Yup." Chelsea said.

"Who's Raife Davies?" I ask feeling left out.

"He's the lead singer of Purple Venom." Carmen said as if it was the most obvious thing.

"Never heard of him or the band." I said shrugging my shoulders and going back to lunch.

"I only know because she lives in a mansion and I asked her about it." Chelsea said.

"I thought she would be in some private school or something. It's cool that she goes here. She's hot." Carmen says.

My ears perk up when she says this. "Are you gay?"

"Spencer! You can't just come out and ask someone that! Maybe she was just admiring her." Chelsea scolds. I never thought she would just be admiring her.

"No it's ok. I am gay." Carmen replied calmly. "Is that a problem?"

"No not at all, right Spencer?" Chelsea said staring at me.

"I…" Bell rings. "I have to go. See you later." I practically ran to my next class completely forgetting that I had this class with Chelsea. I was soon reminded when she came and sat by me.

"Why did you leave like that? Carmen thinks you hate her now." Chelsea whispered.

"The bell rang and I didn't want to be late for class. And I don't hate Carmen, I think she's nice." I replied going to take notes.

"You should tell her that. That is if she decides to even sit with us tomorrow." Chelsea mumbled.

I went back to taking notes and it was quiet for the rest of the class. I honestly don't know why I ran off like that. I guess that if I spoke too much with someone that was gay, I would feel like I should tell them that I am too. I just don't know if I'm ready to let anyone know yet.

Finally it was the last period, which meant one thing, gym. I rushed to the locker rooms to change. As I was changing I did get an extra look or two at the other girls while they changed. We played basketball again, much to my pleasure. After class I went to the locker room to shower, once again taking an extra look or two.

I ran to my car after the bell rang, I really wanted to get home which was odd, but now I had a reason to want to get there. As I wait in the parking lot, I notice Glen surrounded by cheerleaders again. I wonder who he's dating this week. I saw on his side was Aiden and Ashley. They didn't look like all of the other couples that look like they are trying to swallow each other when they make out. He just had his arm around her while she talked to the other cheerleaders. After a while, she hugs him, not kiss but hugs him and leaves. That's interesting. Maybe they just don't like PDA, but Ashley is hot. I wouldn't be able to keep my hands off of her. I don't know how he does it. I follow her with my eyes, until the car behind me honks. I flip them off and drive away.

I rushed through my door as soon as I got home.

"Hey Spencer, how was your day?" Ugh, mom why are you here, don't you have lives to save or something.

"It was good, nothing too interesting." I reply as I try to subtly walk towards the stairs so that she would get the hint.

"Oh maybe you should join something, that never hurts."

"Yea maybe, I'll look into it." I roll my eyes as I head for the stairs.

"Any plans for today?" Why is she talking to me? I just want to go to my room.

"No, I just have a lot of homework." I lie, I only have one assignment.

"Oh ok, you can always come down here when you're done."

"Ok" I ran up the stairs before she could say anything else.

As soon as I made it to my room, I shut my door and threw my bag on my bed. I opened my laptop and clicked on my book mark that I had labeled 'Greek Mythology.' I did that because Glen likes to use my computer sometimes and I didn't want him to know. The website popped up and I quickly logged in. I went to my profile and it said I had no friends online. Damn. I got an idea to look up lesbian books and movies, since they may interest me.

In the middle of my research I heard a 'yippee' sound coming from my computer. What the fuck is that? I looked at my other tabs to see where it was coming from. When I went back to the lesbian chat room, I had an IM from LAbabe4u. A smile broke out on my face.

**LAbabe4u:** Hey Oprah, I was hoping you were online.

**SLC823:** Oh really, why is that?

**LAbabe4u:** For some reason, I like talking to you,

**SLC823:** What is that reason?

**LAbabe4u:** You haven't bored me yet.

**SLC823:** Love the honesty. Hopefully I won't bore you, for some reason I like talking to you too.

**LAbabe4u:** Good

**SLC823:** That's cute, now I smile every time you IM me.

**LAbabe4u:** What's cute?

**SLC823:** Every time you send me an IM it makes a 'yippee' sound.

**LAbabe4u:** I changed it just for you. I thought you would like it or hate it. I took a risk.

**SLC823:** You're such a daredevil, Gayle.

**LAbabe4u:** That's what they call me

**SLC823:** I'm sure they do

**LAbabe4u:** So I've been wondering all day. I know you have blonde hair and blue eyes, but that's it. Tell me more about yourself.

**SLC823:** Well I'm about 5'4 and I weigh about 115. I was raised Catholic, I have an older brother, and I'm a senior in high school.

**LAbabe4u:** Nice I like that. Wait, your parents are Catholic?

**SLC823:** Unfortunately this makes this whole, being gay thing really hard.

**LAbabe4u:** Damn, I'm sorry.

**SLC823:** It's ok. I might just wait until I move out to tell them. I think it would be easier.

**LAbabe4u:** Yea that might be better.

**SLC823:** So now that you know about me, tell me about you.

**LAbabe4u:** Well you know about me being a cheerleader with a fake boyfriend. Umm I live in LA obviously hence the username. I was pretty much raised by a different nanny every year because my parents were too busy to be parents. I'm 5'3 and I weigh 113. I have curly brown hair and brown eyes.

**SLC823:** Wow that's a lot to take in.

**LAbabe4u:** I know but since I told you about my username, it's only fair that you tell me about yours.

**SLC823:** It stands for my initials and my birthday.

**LAbabe4u**: Oprah starts with an O not a S.

**SLC823:** Oprah is just my stage name.

**LAbabe4u:** Ok so what is your real name?

**SLC823:** Hmm if I tell you, I'd have to kill you.

**LAbabe4u:** I don't feel like dying today, maybe some other time.

**SLC823:** Good because I really don't feel like killing anyone today.

**LAbabe4u:** I'm glad I caught you on a good day.

**SLC823**: I guess today is another one of your lucky days.

**LAbabe4u:** I always seem to have a lucky day when I talk to you.

**SLC823:** I'm your own personal lucky charm

**LAbabe4u:** I like the sound of that. Oprah, my lucky charm.

**SLC823:** It has a ring to it.

**LAbabe4u:** Lol. You're cute.

**SLC823:** Thanks, I wish I could say the same for you.

**LAbabe4u:** Ouch! That one stung.

**SLC823:** I'm sorry to hear that.

**LAbabe4u:** I'm sure you aren't.

**SLC823:** So I have a question.

**LAbabe4u:** I might have an answer.

**SLC823:** Well first, are you out to your parents?

**LAbabe4u:** Yes.

**SLC823:** How did they take it?

**LAbabe4u:** My mom didn't care, even though she never really did care about what I did. My dad said he'd always love me no matter what.

**SLC823:** I'm glad you have someone like your dad in your life. I don't know how I will tell my parents.

**LAbabe4u:** It takes time and they may not accept you or they may tell you what my dad told me. You never really know until it happens.

**SLC823:** Thanks.

**LAbabe4u:** No problem. I hate to go, but I have a game tonight. Will I be able to talk to you tomorrow?

**SLC823**: That's if you want to, but I'll be on. Good luck tonight.

**LAbabe4u:** Thank you, ttyl

After she logged off, I went back to looking up lesbian movies. This D.E.B.S. movie seems to be popular; maybe I should check it out.

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews! I really hope everyone is enjoying it so far. I forgot to mention that I got this idea from how I met my girlfriend almost 4 years ago. This story is completely different from how everything worked out for us, but we did meet online. So yea, please review and thank you!**


	4. Chapter 4

Four classes down and I finally get a break. Thank God for having an hour lunch break.

As I am walking to lunch, I am actually paying attention to what's happening around me, rather than getting lost in my thoughts. So this time I actually see the cheerleader that I've bumped into every other day coming towards me.

When we pass each other she looks at me and slightly smiles, I couldn't help but return the gesture.

I make my way on to the quad and I notice that Chelsea and Carmen are actually sitting at the table. I guess they aren't mad at me.

When I get closer, they shift apart a little. Why do they do that every time I come to the damn table?

I sit down and take out my food. "Hey guys."

"Hey." They replied in unison. I guess they are still mad.

"Look Carmen, I want to apologize for how I acted yesterday. I was just shocked and I didn't know what to say. But I don't have any problem with you being gay. It actually makes you more unique." I say with a smile. I hope it works.

"It's no big deal. I've had a lot worse, but thank you for apologizing." Carmen says with a smile.

"I feel really bad about that. I hope you didn't think I was some homophobic freak." I laugh. She laughs awkwardly. "Oh My God! You did, didn't you? I really didn't mean to give you that impression."

"It's ok really. Yesterday, yes I did think you were homophobic. I wasn't going to sit here today, but Chelsea threatened me if I didn't." Carmen says sticking her tongue out at Chelsea.

"You know you really wanted to. I mean, where else would you have gone?" Chelsea raises her eyebrow at Carmen.

"You're right, but I could have easily made some new friends or sat alone."

"That wouldn't be as fun though, would it?" I jump back into the conversation. She laughs and shakes her head. "Exactly!"

I spent the rest of lunch and whatever class I had after thinking about LAbabe4u and how I am really starting to like her. Our conversations seem to flow naturally. Even though I only started talking to her a few days ago, it feels like I've known her for forever. I've never felt that way with anyone else, I mean even Chelsea didn't immediately like me when we first met.

During gym, I figured that I should stop perving on the other girls before I get caught. I just can't help that I find them attractive. I got a few looks in before quickly changing and heading out to the court.

Today we did nothing but drills. I love that I have a brother that plays basketball; it makes everything I do in this class so much easier.

Another 45 minutes later and I start walking towards the locker rooms.

"Hey, Carlin!" I turn around to see the gym teacher calling me. I sigh and make my way over to him. What did I do now?

"Yea coach?" I ask fiddling with my fingers. Nervous habit.

"Why aren't you on the basketball team?" What?

"Excuse me?" I tilt my head in confusion.

"You are obviously good at basketball; I just want to know why you aren't playing for the girl's team."

"I guess I didn't think I was that good, and I never really thought about it."

"Well the girl's team has been struggling so promise me that you will at least think about it?" He asks sweetly.

"Yea sure." I turn and walk into the locker rooms. That was weird.

I quickly change and walk to the parking lot.

As soon as I walk through the door I see my parents sitting on the couch watching the news. How boring, I hope I don't get like that one day.

"Hey mom, hi dad."

They turn to look at me. "Hey Kiddo, how was your day?" my dad asks.

I absolutely love my dad, sometimes I wonder why he's with my mom she can be a real pain in the ass.

"It was a good, nothing really interesting happened." Then I remembered what happened in gym. "Oh except my gym teacher thinks I should join the basketball team."

"I think that's a great idea." Of course you do Paula. "I mean just think about how that would look on your college applications!" That earns an eye roll.

"I think it would be great, but only do it if you really want to, don't feel like you have to just because other people think it's a great idea." My dad says giving my mom a look. And this is why he is my favorite.

"I haven't made a decision yet, I'm still thinking about it." I shrug.

"We will support you either way, honey. Right Paula?"

She looks like she wants to say something else, but my dad gives her another look. "Right."

"Well I'm going to my room, call me for dinner." I say and then head upstairs.

As soon as I get to my room, I throw my bag on the floor. I walk over to my desk to grab my laptop then I lay down on my bed.

I immediately went to the gay chat website and logged on. And fortunately for me LAbabe4u was on this time.

Is it bad that I've only started talking to her two days ago, and I miss her so much? I don't think that's healthy but oh well.

**SLC823:** Heyyy

**L.4u:** Hi what's up?

**SLC823:** Nothing, I just got home.

**L.4u:** Same here. School sucks.

**SLC823:** I know! It's like 8 hours of torture.

**L.4u:** At least we get a break for lunch right?

**SLC823:** Very true, I'm thankful for that at least.

**L.4u:** How was your day besides the torture?

**SLC823:** Well it was awkward, and interesting.

**L.4u:** continue

**SLC823:** Well I kinda gave someone the impression that I was homophobic yesterday.

**L.4u:** How the hell did you manage to do that?

**SLC823:** lol well she made a comment about this girl being hot, which she is, and I asked if she was gay. She said yes and asked if I had a problem with it.

**SLC823:** I was shocked and didn't know what to say. And I felt that if I would have said anything than I would have told her that I was gay and I'm not ready for that yet.

**L.4u:** Oh so you just didn't say anything?

**SLC823:** No the bell rang, and I went to class.

**L.4u:** Wow I would have thought you were homophobic too.

**SLC823:** Ugh I know, I'm horrible. But I didn't know what else to do.

**L.4u:** Don't be so hard on yourself; you are new to it all. It will get easier.

**SLC823:** I hope so. I just don't see why it's a big deal. I like girls instead of guys, big deal.

**L.4u:** I understand completely but not everyone else does.

**SLC823:** This is going to be hard.

**L.4u:** I know, but what made it easy for me was that I had my best friend by my side to help me throughout it all. Does anyone besides me know?

**SLC823:** Nope you should feel lucky that you are the only person to know my secret.

**L.4u:** I will never tell anyone, I promise.

**SLC823:** Thank you, Gayle. That means a lot.

**L.4u**: No problem. But maybe you should think about telling someone that you trust, like a friend or your brother.

**SLC823:** Well my best friend seems to be ok with that girl that thought I was homophobic, so maybe I can tell her. I'm not sure if I want to tell my brother or not yet. I mean we are close, but what if he doesn't approve, I don't want to lose him.

**L.4u:** You don't have to figure it all out now. Take your time.

**SLC823:** I will. Thanks for letting me vent, and giving me advice.

**L.4u:** I like talking to you so it's no big deal.

I hear a knock on my door and I quickly minimize the screen. "Come in!"

Glen opens the door and pokes his head in my room. "Hey Spence, it feels like I haven't seen you since the day before school started." He walks in my room and sits at my desk.

"Yea I know. I'm sorry but I've had a lot of homework." I lie. I hate lying to him, but what else could I say? Oh yea sorry that I couldn't hang out with you Glen, but I've been in my room talking to girls all day because I just found out that I'm a lesbian! Yea, no not happening.

"That's what you get for taking all of those hard classes. If you would have stuck to the standard classes like me, then you would have time to hang out with your big bro." He laughs.

"How many times do I have to tell you that you can't be considered my big bro if we are twins? And I have your mother pressuring me to get into an amazing college. I don't have any chance at getting an athletic scholarship like you." I roll my eyes.

"First, I am older than you by five minutes. And second, you already have good enough grades to get into a college. I don't know why you let her control you Spence."

"Yea I know, I just…I don't know."

"Look how about we go outside and play a few games of hoops. We haven't played since summer and tryouts are starting soon so I need to perfect my game."

"Yea yea, let me change and I will be out in 5."

"Awesome, thanks Spence." He finally leaves.

I open the screen and LAbabe4u is still there, thank God.

**LAbabe4u: **Hey Oprah are you still there?

**SLC823:** Sorry, my brother came in.

**L.4u:** It's all good.

**SLC823**: I'm really sorry to cut this short, but my brother wants me to play basketball with him so I won't be back on until later.

**L.4u:** that's hot

**SLC823:** Ok Paris Hilton. Do I have to give you a new name? Lol

**L.4u:** lol eww no not Paris, I'm fine being Gayle.

**SLC823:** that's what I thought. But anyways what's hot.

**L.4u:** girls playing sports is just hot to me.

**SLC823:** well if you're lucky maybe you can watch me play sometime.

**L.4u:** I hope it's sometime soon.

**SLC823:** enough with the flirting I have to go.

**L.4u:** later Oprah.

**SLC823:** bye Gayle.

I close my computer and go to my closet to change into a sports bra and some basketball shorts.

I head outside to see Glen shooting the ball. I run up to him, steal the ball and shoot it. Swish!

"That was a lucky shot." He whined.

"Yea you keep telling yourself that. Whatever helps you sleep at night."

"Whatever let's just play. Best 2 out of 3?"

"Yea sure."

After he won the first game, we got a drink of water.

"How about we make this interesting?" He asks. Oh God what does he want now?

"Keep talking."

"If I win, you do something for me, if you win, I'll wash your car for a week."

"What's your something?"

"I'll tell you when I win."

"Fine, but I'm not going anywhere near that thing you call a room." I say seriously. I mean come on. I can hardly walk pass there without gagging.

"Fine, but you have to pinky swear that you will do it."

I sigh. "Fine." I walk to him and hold my pinky out. We have been pinky swearing since I can remember. You can never back down on a pinky swear.

I won the second game; see I'm not that bad.

"Last game Glen, are you ready?" I tease.

"You won because I let you. I wanted you to think that you actually had a chance."

"Yea whatever, let's go."

It's the end of the game, and we are tied 20-20, game is 21. I have the ball now and I know I'm going to win.

Dribble the ball, fake left, jump for the shot, and "Kids dinner!"

"Fuck!" I miss the shot. Thanks dad, I love you, but you just made me lose.

"Yes!" I hear Glen yell as he makes the shot.

"That's not fair, I was distracted. I almost won!" I whine.

"Keyword: almost. I won fair and square."

I roll my eyes. "Fine what do you want?"

"Well coach came up to me and told me to convince you to try out for the girls' basketball team. So because you lost, now you have no choice but to try out."

"Glen basketball is your thing, not mine."

"Spence, you are good, better than a lot of the guys on the team I mean you almost beat me and I wasn't taking it easy on you."

"Fine I'll think about it."

"You pinky swore. Why don't you want to try out anyway? You love basketball just as much as I do."

"I know, I just don't want Paula pressuring me to win and do better."

"I will be right there to tell her to back off if she does."

"Thanks Glen. Will you help me practice?"

"Every day."

"Thanks."

After dinner, I took a nice long shower. I did my homework and brought out my laptop again. I really hope she's online.

**SLC823: **Don't you have anything better to do besides talk to lesbians all day?

**L.4u:** lol I haven't been on all day. And what's wrong with talking to lesbians?

**SLC823:** Nothing at all. But what have you done while I was gone.

**L.4u:** Well I had to go to cheer practice right after you got off, I had dinner with my 'boyfriend', took a shower, and now I'm back on.

**SLC823:** Nice. How was practice?

**L.4u:** It was good. Some of the girls can't get the simplest routines and I wonder how they made the squad anyways.

**SLC823:** lol probably just because they are hot.

**L.4u:** probably lol I have recruited some girls just because they are hot

**SLC823:** I knew it!

**L.4u:** I'm only human, and they make good eye candy.

**SLC823**: but what's the point in being a cheerleader if you don't know how to cheer?

**L.4u:** To get people to come to the games.

**SLC823: **aren't the teams good enough?

**L.4u:** some of them are but others need a little help

**SLC823:** oh so using cheerleaders to attract a crowd? Smart thinking.

**L.4u:** I know

**SLC823:** is your ego always this big?

**L.4u:** yup

**SLC823:** wow

**L.4u:** lol so how was basketball with your brother?

**SLC823:** interesting, I almost beat him but I was distracted

**L.4u:** didn't you say that he was on the basketball team at your school?

**SLC823**: yea

**L.4u:** And you almost beat him?

**SLC823:** yea.

**L.4u:** nice, why don't you play?

**SLC823:** well as of today, I'm trying out for the girl's team next week.

**L.4u:** awesome, I definitely would love to see you play

**SLC823:** maybe one day, but for now, I have to go

**L.4u:** ok, I will talk to you tomorrow right?

**SLC823:** of course

**L.4u:** cool good night Oprah

**SLC823**: Night

**A/N: I love the reviews! Sorry it took me a while to update, but I finally did it! Please let me know what you think. Did you hate it or love it? Oh and if you are on twitter you can find me if you want. I love to meet new people! So yea review!**


	5. Chapter 5

"Ok ten more suicides then we are done for today." Glen says then blows that obnoxious whistle.

I roll my eyes "Is the whistle really necessary?"

"You ask me that every day and each time I tell you the same thing."

"Yea yea I know, the coach will use one whether I like it or not." I say mocking him.

"Hey I am just trying to make sure that you are prepared. Enough with the chit chat start on those suicides." He blows the whistle again.

I shake my head, take a sip of my water, and then start on my suicides.

Fifteen minutes later, I am trying to catch my breath while Glen blows that damn whistle.

"You are getting better at those Spence. When we started a week ago it took you twice as long to do the same amount of suicides. Good job." He pats me on the back.

"Thanks for helping me with this Glen." I smile.

"No problem I told you I would so I'm sticking to my promise."

We walk in the house and see mom cooking dinner. Since when does she cook?

"Um hey mom, where's dad?" Glen steals the words from my mouth.

"He said that he will be late tonight, so I'm cooking dinner." She replies nonchalantly.

"Oh…ok" Glen says and we continue our walk towards the staircase. Glen grabs his keys and turns towards the door.

"I'll go this time so you can take a shower. What do you want?" He whispers.

"Where are you going?"

"Wendy's" He shrugs.

"Oh I wanted to try that new Berry Salad."

"Ok I'll be back in like twenty minutes." He turns and leaves.

If you ever tried my mom's cooking, you would do the same thing. Anyways I run upstairs to take a shower. By the time I got out, my food was waiting on my desk.

I turn on my TV to watch Family Guy as I eat my salad. Just as Stewie starts yelling "mommy, ma, ma, mama, ma, mommy..." I hear my mom call for dinner. As I walk downstairs, I start thinking of ways I can get out of eating dinner. When I walk into the kitchen, I quickly through my empty salad bowl away and sit at the table. I look down at my food and I have no idea what the hell it is. It's all gooey; I guess it's supposed to some kind of pasta.

I look towards Glen and he shrugs at me before digging in. I pick up my fork and move the stuff around.

"What's wrong honey, aren't you hungry?" My mom asks.

"Not really" I sigh.

"Why not? Are you feeling ok?"

"I'm just nervous about tomorrow, I can't really eat anything. Do you mind if I just go to my room for the night?" I hope this works.

"No problem, you have no reason to be worried, you will do just fine tomorrow." She smiles. It almost makes me feel bad that I am lying to her.

"Thank you, I'll see you tomorrow, good night." I stand up and walk to the stairs. Before I go up the stairs, I turn around to look at Glen and smirk at him. He mouthed 'I hate you' and that earned him another smirk.

I ran upstairs to my room and quickly shut my door. I sat down on my bed and grabbed my laptop. As soon as I signed into to the chat room, I feel my phone vibrate. 'You deserve an Oscar for that performance.' I laugh and type my reply. 'You're just mad that you have to sit there and eat that shit, whatever it is.'

_Yippee _

I smile and look back towards my laptop to see that I have a new IM from LAbabe4u. It doesn't matter what mood I'm in, whenever I hear that yippee sound, I smile.

**LAbabe4u: **hey how was your practice with your bro

Speaking of Glen, I have a new text. 'It doesn't taste as bad if you hold your breath while you chew.' I laugh and reply. 'I would rather not eat it at all : p'

**SLC823:** It was nice, I'm kinda sore though

**LAbabe4u: **sounds like you could use one of my special massages

**SLC823: **is that the one that comes with the happy ending?

**LAbabe823: **it does if you want it to ; )

**SLC823:** in that case I would love one of your special massages

**LAbabe4u:** I think I'm rubbing off on you, Oprah

**SLC823:** Oh yea why is that

**LAbabe4u:** because you are a lot flirtier now than when we first started talking

**SLC823: **well I guess you bring out that side of me

**LAbabe4u:** Well I'm glad because I like that side

**SLC823:** You really have a way with words, is that how you get girls to sleep with you?

**LAbabe4u:** lol I guess you can say that. It's all part of the charm

**SLC823:** I figured

**LAbabe4u:** And it helps that I'm hot

**SLC823:** Isn't that huge ego a turn off?

**LAbabe4u:** I don't know, you tell me

**SLC823:** I'll get back to you on that one

**LAbabe4u:** lol ok. So are you excited for tomorrow?

**SLC823:** What's tomorrow?

**LAbabe4u:** Don't play dumb, you know what I'm talking about

**SLC823:** I have no idea what you are talking about. Lay off the pipe, Gayle.

**LAbabe4u:** Haha very funny. I'm talking about the try-outs, smart ass

**SLC823:** Oh those

**LAbabe4u:** yes those

**SLC823:** well I'm more nervous than excited

**LAbabe4u:** You will be fine; you've been practicing every day for over a week

**SLC823:** Thanks that means a lot

**LAbabe4u**: Anytime

**SLC823:** I guess I should get some sleep since I have a big day tomorrow

**LAbabe4u:** Aww but it's only 11

**SLC823:** I know but I can't stay up until 3 talking to you again, I have to have enough energy for tomorrow

**LAbabe4u:** Fine I guess you can go this time

**SLC823:** Thank you for being so kind

**LAbabe4u:** You're such a smart ass.

**SLC823:** That's why you talk to me every day, right?

**LAbabe4u:** Exactly, your smartassness is one of your best qualities

**SLC823:** Smartassness? I didn't even know that was a word

**LAbabe4u:** You know what they say 'you learn something new every day'

**SLC823:** lol right, well on that note, good night Gayle

**LAbabe4u:** until tomorrow Oprah

I laugh and turn off my laptop. She always makes me laugh, even when I have had a bad day. It has become a ritual for us to talk as soon as I finish practicing with Glen and when she gets back from cheer practice, until about 3 in the morning. I only get about three and a half hours of sleep each night, but she is worth it. Well so far she is. I don't even know if this online friendship will go anywhere, but I hope it does.

The next day I wake up feeling refreshed and ready to go. After showering, I head downstairs for breakfast. During breakfast my parents and Glen said the usual 'good luck' and 'go kick some ass today' I bet you can guess who said what.

When I get to school, I don't see Chelsea like I normally would; I guess she is running late today. I find an empty table on the quad to sit at. I take out my IPod and mellow out with some Jessie J. What a great way to start my day. I look around the quad and notice that half of the people here sleeping or drinking coffee to wake up. A few minutes later, the bell finally leaves and I walk to class.

While I was walking to lunch, I didn't notice Ashley and I couldn't help but be a little disappointed. It's not that we have spoken or anything, but we seem to have this unspoken conversation every day before lunch. I'm still surprised that she hasn't called me a freak or weirdo for staring at her. I mean she is a cheerleader, but maybe she is like Gayle. Who knows, I'm too much of a pussy to talk to her.

I get to my table and decide to not even comment on how close Chelsea and Carmen are today.

"Hey Chels, where were you today?" I ask sitting down.

"Oh umm I started going to the art room before school starts, it helps me get through the day." She smiles. Carmen just raises an eyebrow. I wonder what that's about.

"Oh cool. You have to show me some of your work soon. My room needs to be updated." She laughs, but I'm serious.

"You hang her paintings up in your room?" Carmen asks.

"Well yea, have you seen them?"

"Yea but I just thought you would have some posters out of J-14 hanging up instead."

"Haha very funny." I say sarcastically. "I grew out of that phase." I mumble. Carmen laughs and I glare at her.

"Anyways, you should come by sometime and you can pick out what you want, ok?" Chelsea says.

"Yea thank you."

"So are you ready for the basketball try-outs today?"

"Yes but I just want them to be over with already."

"They will be over before you know it. I know you will make it because you are really good. I just don't know why you aren't already on the team."

"You know how my mother is, but I'm not taking her shit anymore. Things about me have changed." I instantly begin to think of LAbabe4u. She is always on my mind. I mean I have feelings for her and we may never meet. She might not even be who she says she is. For all I know she could be some lonely 45 year old man. Oh great, now I just scared myself.

"What about you have changed?" Chelsea asks.

"A lot, trust me." I really want to tell her but I'm not sure if I should with Carmen standing here. "Speaking of which, I really need to talk to you."

Chelsea looks at me. She raises her eyebrow at me like she's trying to figure out what I need to tell her. "Ok we can have a girls night tomorrow night. We will stay up watching movies and gossiping, like old times."

"Ok I like the sound of that." I smile because I will finally be able to talk to someone about what's been going on with me.

After lunch, gym seems to come in no time. I quickly changed my clothes and walk to the court. When I get there the coach waves me over.

"Yea, Coach?"

"I just want to see if you were trying out for the team today?"

"Yes, right after school."

"Good, if it was up to me you wouldn't even have to try out but unfortunately I don't make the rules."

I laugh. "Thanks, I'll try not to let you down."

"I'm sure you won't. The team could really use you, you're really talented, Carlin."

"Thanks, Coach."

After gym, I didn't even bother to change, since I would be getting sweaty all over again. I went to my car to put my bag and clothes in there. While walking back to my car, I noticed Glen and Aiden talking. Glen saw me and waved me over. Ugh I really don't want to talk to anyone right now.

"Hey Spence are ready to go kick some ass?"

"Yea, that's where I was going before you stopped me."

"Oh well good luck, even though you don't need it."

"Thanks, I'll see you later."

"What, I don't get a hi or anything?" That's Aiden of course.

"Hey Aiden." He hugs me. At least he smells good.

"Good luck."

"Thanks." I start to leave.

"Oh wait, there's someone I want you to meet." Aiden yells. Shit I was almost safe.

I turn around. "Can it wa—" I stop when I notice who's standing there.

"Spencer, this is my girlfriend Ashley, Ashley this is Spencer, Glen's sister." I know who she is.

"Nice to meet you." We say at the same time. I blush and laugh. Her smile is even bigger than the ones she would normally give me when we pass each other in the hall way. Her nose crinkles with this smile, and it's the cutest thing I've ever seen. We shake hands and her hands are so unbelievably soft and warm. I don't want to let go, but unfortunately all good things must come to an end. She smiles at me as we let go, and I get butterflies. What is this girl doing to me?

"As much as I would love to stay and talk, I have to go before I'm late." I say only looking at her.

She nods. "Maybe we can talk some other time then." She replies with a smile.

"Yea, maybe. I'll see you around." I turn and head towards the gym. As I am walking, I can feel someone's eyes on me. I look back and I see Glen and Aiden deeply in conversation, and Ashley is giving me a shy smile. I smile back and wave. She gives me a nose crinkling smile, which has easily become my favorite type of smile, and waves back.

I turn back around and continue towards the gym. I hope this goes well, I think as I open the door.

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews, you are all awesome! I love all of the story alerts and favorite story alerts. They mean a lot, honestly! I am glad to see everyone enjoying this as much as I am. I know it may be slow now, but it will pick up soon.**


	6. Chapter 6

When I open the door, I notice that are already a few girls here. I saw a line in the front of the gym; I guess that's where we sign in. After signing in, I looked around at the other girls. Some are stretching and others are just sitting around talking. Since I don't really know anyone here, I decide to stretch. After a few minutes of stretching, Coach Roberts came in and picked up the clip board that we signed in on, and blew her whistle.

"Hey ladies, I'm Coach Roberts, and I assume that you are all here for the Girls' Basketball Try-outs. If not, then the door is that way." She said pointing to the doors I came through a few minutes ago.

No one moved so she continued. "Ok now that that's out of the way. There are a few things you should know before you try-out. If you make the team, your class schedule will be changed so that the team has one period of the day devoted to basketball practice. We have two games per week one on Wednesday and the other on Friday. Your parents will have to sign a consent form because we do go on many away games and depending on the distance, hotels may be needed. If you are not comfortable with anything I just said please leave."

Once again, no one moved. "Ok I noticed that some of you were already stretching when I came in, while others just sat around talking. It's good to see that some of you are already taking it seriously, while others not so much. If you are not going to take this seriously and just waste my time, you can leave now." No movement. "Ok I want everyone to go to the base line and do twenty suicides; by the time I blow my whistle you should be done." She blew her whistle. "To the base line!" And everyone practically ran, this lady is fucking scary.

The practice was pretty easy and basic. After a few drills, we played an eight-on-eight game. And let me just say, those girls are fucking violent, I was elbowed so many times, I lost count.

"Ok ladies, good to some of you, others should have left when I gave you the chance. I will post the roster tomorrow morning before school starts. If your name is on that list, it will be accompanied by your new schedule. And for the rest of you, I hope you come to our games and support us. Good night!" And with that she left.

I made my way to the water fountain and of course there was a line.

"How do you think you did?" I heard someone from behind me say. I turn around to see a girl with blonde hair and green eyes looking at me.

"I think I did ok, how about you?"

"The try-outs were kinda tough, but I think I have a good chance at making it." She shrugs.

"Well good luck." I reply with a smile.

"Same to you. By the way I'm Kendra Wilson." She put her hand out for me to shake.

I shake her hand and reply "Spencer Carlin."

"So Spencer, what year are you?"

"Senior, you?"

"Same, seems like we have another thing in common." She smirks.

"What's the first thing?" I question.

"Well for one we both like basketball, and two we are both hot." I raise my eyebrow at her. "Don't look at me like that you know it's true."

I laugh "I don't know what you are talking about." I turn around and see that I'm next in line.

"Sure you don't Spencer."

After getting water, I left the gym and went to the parking lot. It is so much easier to get out of this place when there is barely anyone left.

I finally make it home and as soon as I open the door, I am bombarded with questions.

"Do you think you made the team?" "How was it?" "Did you kick ass?"

"Whoa ok, first, I don't know if I made the team or not, Mom. I will find out tomorrow morning. Dad it was good, I thought it was pretty easy, so I think I have a good chance at making the team. And Glen, yes I did kick ass." I smile. "As much as I would love to sit down here and talk to you about what happen, I would really love to take a shower."

"Ok I will call you down for dinner honey."

"Thanks, dad." I reply while running up the stairs to my room.

I dropped my bag and started undressing. I took a nice long shower and as soon as I finished getting dressed, my dad called me down for dinner.

I took my seat and began eating. And this time I could tell that it was Chicken Alfredo. I love when my dad cooks.

"Oh yea, I'm going to Chelsea's tomorrow for the night, so I'm just going to go there from school."

"Ok, how is Chelsea anyway?" My mom asks.

"She's good; she's been painting a lot more. Somehow she suddenly got her inspiration back." I shrug.

"Well that's good. She is an amazing artist." My dad says.

"Yea I know."

"So did you see anyone that you know at the try-outs today?" Glen asks.

"No but I did meet someone there."

"Oh who?"

"Kendra Wilson."

"Oh she is hot! I have been trying to get with her for years now."

"Aww did Glen get turned down?" I said teasingly.

"Yea but that's only because she's a lesbian. Trust me, if she wasn't, I would have been bagged her." He said smirking.

My mom choked on her drink, "She's a what?"

"Umm a lesbian?" Glen says hesitantly.

"I think you need to make other friends, and stay away from this Kendra person. I don't think she is a good influence." What a fucking bitch!

"Are you serious, mom?" I scoff.

"Well yea, she's living her life in sin."

"I can't believe this. You can't tell me who to be friends with! I think I'm old enough to make my own decisions." I push my chair back and stand up. "I lost my appetite; I'm going to my room." I leave the table and go upstairs to my room.

Lifting my bed, I see my purple book that I use to write in. In this book I write whatever I'm feeling. I pick up my book and put it on my bed. I get my laptop that's on my desk, put it on my bed and turn it on. When it starts, I open my iTunes and start playing some music. Once the music starts, I open my notebook and get lost in it.

I don't stop until I hear a knock on my door. I roll my eyes, put the book down, and pause the music. "Come in!"

"Hey Spence, are you ok?" Glen says poking his head in my door.

"Yea, I'm fine, I just wish she wasn't such an uptight bitch."

He laughs. "Yea but unfortunately she is our mother."

"Unfortunately." I sigh.

"Look I'm going over to Aiden's house, if you want to go you are more than welcome."

"You never invite me over there, why now?"

"Well I know you probably don't want to be here right now." He shrugs.

"No, I'm good. I'm over it, but thanks anyway."

"No problem, I'll see you later." He closes the door.

I stood up, lift my bed, and put my book back. I'm really not in the mood and I could use some cheering up right now.

I sit back down on my bed and grab my laptop. Back to the chat rooms I go.

**SLC823**: hey loser

**LAbabe4u**: why am I a loser?

**SLC823**: Umm idk because you are a cheerleader

**LAbabe4u:** cheerleading is a real sport, thank you very much!

**SLC823**: haha thanks, I needed that laugh

**LAbabe4u:** you are such a bitch

**SLC823**: and yet you still talk to me

**LAbabe4u:** I'm still trying to figure out why

**SLC823**: it takes you 2 weeks to think about something, wow that must be a record

**LAbabe4u:** you never stop do you?

**SLC823:** nope

**LAbabe4u:** I notice. I think we need to break up.

**SLC823**: But Gayle, you know Stedman doesn't know how to do that tongue thing you do; you can't leave me with him

**LAbabe4u**: you should have thought about my amazing tongue before you started being mean to me.

**SLC823:** ok fine, I'm sorry. Forgive me?

**LAbabe4u:** hmm idk yet

**SLC823:** what do I have to do for you to take me back?

**LAbabe4u:** say Cheerleading is a sport

**SLC823:** you are asking for a lot

**LAbabe4u:** say hi to Stedman for me

**SLC823:** fine fine, Cheerleading is a sport, happy?

**LAbabe4u:** very

**SLC823:** good, anything to make you happy.

**LAbabe4u**: ok enough with the mushy shit, how were the try-outs?

**SLC823:** lol they were good, I think I have a good chance at making it

**LAbabe4u:** cool when do you find out

**SLC823:** tomorrow morning, which means I have to get to school earlier

**LAbabe4u:** that sucks, but I hope you make the team though

**SLC823:** thanks me too

**LAbabe4u:** any plans for the weekend?

**SLC823:** oh yea! I'm telling my best friend tomorrow. We are having a girl's night tomorrow night.

**LAbabe4u:** That's good, I'm happy for you.

**SLC823:** Thank you. I think it will go over well, I'm just nervous.

**LAbabe4u:** don't be, if she is a true friend, she will understand.

**SLC823:** I think she will. So what about you, any big plans for the weekend?

**LAbabe4u:** I think I'm going to a club with my boyfriend tomorrow night

**SLC823:** That sounds like fun

**LAbabe4u:** Oh yea it's been a while since I've been out. I really need to get laid.

**SLC823:** haha ok. Good luck with that

**LAbabe4u:** I don't need luck. As soon as I walk in the club, I have girls throwing themselves at me!

**SLC823:** Gosh I thought we got rid of that ego for the night

**LAbabe4u:** My ego is here to stay baby

**SLC823:** I see that. Well have fun getting laid tomorrow

**LAbabe4u:** thank you

**SLC823:** So when do you think you will stop fucking around and commit to someone?

**LAbabe4u:** wow very blunt, and I will when I find someone that makes me want to give that all up. I am enjoying my life too much right now to want to be tied down.

**SLC823:** I hope I never cross your path then

**LAbabe4u:** you never know, you could be that one girl that makes me give it all up

**SLC823:** I'm not sure if it's worth the chance.

**LAbabe4u:** we will never know until it happens, right?

**SLC823:** right. But it's already 1 so I should be getting to bed now

**LAbabe4u:** Ok, will I talk to you sometime soon?

**SLC823:** Yea sometime this weekend

**LAbabe4u:** cool bye Oprah

**SLC823:** Later

I logged out and closed my computer. I put my computer back on my desk, turn the light off, and went to bed. My thoughts were all over the place, so it made it hard for me to fall asleep.

I really hope I made the basketball team.

I wonder how Chelsea would take the news about me coming out. My mom would probably kick me out or send me to some anti-gay camp. I wonder how Glen would take it. He would probably say 'now we can hit on girls together.'

Ashley is hot, and she has an adorable smile. But she is with Aiden, so I should just stop now. She might be just like all of the other cheer bitches though. Ugh I really don't like them.

I didn't even know that Kendra was a lesbian. I mean she did flirt with me, but some girls are like that. She was hot though, so maybe something can come from that.

Then there's LAbabe4u. I like her. She seems to have a really great personality, but she's a player. I couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy run through me when she told me that she was going to get laid this weekend. I have no right to feel that way, we are just friends. I might not ever meet her in person.

Ugh! Too many thoughts at once, I really need some sleep.

I guess I finally dosed off in the middle of my thoughts, because a few hours later, my stupid alarm clock started ringing.

I quickly showered and got dressed. I grabbed a pop tart and ran out the door before I ran into my mom.

The parking lot was pretty empty and quiet by the time I got to school. I found a good parking spot and parked. I grabbed my bag and headed towards the gym.

I have so many butterflies, it's crazy. I made it to the gym and saw a group of girls crowding the door. I made my way through the group and took a deep breath before looking at the roster. I open my eyes and scan the list for my name.

HELL YES! I am jumping for joy on the inside right now!

"Good job Spencer, it looks like we are going to be teammates for the year." I know that voice.

I turn to see Kendra standing by my side. I look back at the list and saw her name. "Looks that way." I smile. I am actually kinda happy about being on the same team with her, we can get to know each other.

"Congrats, maybe we can go celebrate tonight?"

"I wish I could, but I already have plans. Maybe some other time?"

"Yea, do you have a phone so I could give you my number?" I hand her my phone and she quickly puts her number in. She then hands me her phone, and I put my number in it. "Cool so I'll see you around." She smiles and leaves.

I turn back to the roster, and then I notice the desk on the side and pick up my new schedule and the parent consent form. I put the consent form in my bag and look at my new schedule. A few of my classes are changed, but I still have Lit with Chelsea which is all I was worried about.

Chelsea! She told me yesterday that she gets here early to paint in the art studio. I need to tell her that I made the team.

As I turned the corner to the art classes, I took out my phone to check the time. Its 7:10, she should be here by now. I opened the door to the studio that Chelsea is usually in.

"Chelsea are you- OH MY GOD!" Next thing I know I heard my phone crack on the ground. What the fuck is going on?

**A/N: Yay another chapter! Thanks for the reviews and alerts again! The reviews make me laugh, I love reading them so thanks! Don't you just love cliffhangers? No, well I do! Well when I write them, lol. Anyway please review! I love them!**


	7. Chapter 7

_**Previously**_

_Chelsea! She told me yesterday that she gets here early to paint in the art studio. I need to tell her that I made the team. _

_As I turned the corner to the art classes, I took out my phone to check the time. Its 7:10, she should be here by now. I opened the door to the studio that Chelsea is usually in._

"_Chelsea are you- OH MY GOD!" Next thing I know I heard my phone crack on the ground. What the fuck is going on?_

"Spencer! What are you doing here?" Chelsea says fixing her clothes. I pick up the remains of my phone, it cannot be fixed. Great now I have to get a new phone.

"I came here to tell you that I made the team, but the more important question is what are you two doing in here?" I say standing up and crossing my arms over my chest.

"Umm…well…"Chelsea stutters.

"I'm waiting." I say as I take a seat in the chair next to the door. Chelsea stays quiet. "How about you, can you tell me what's going on Carmen?" I say with a smirk.

She looks at Chelsea nervously and shrugs. "I have to get going. I will see you two at lunch." She picks up her bag and leaves.

"Look, I didn't want you to find out this way, but you did." She begins to play with her fingers. "We…Carmen and I are dating."

I nod. "Well I would hope that you were dating, I mean I hope you wouldn't make out with just anyone." I had a feeling there was something going on between those two. I am just a little hurt that Chelsea didn't tell me before. "I just want to know why you didn't tell me that you were dating Carmen. Let alone that you were gay or bi or whatever."

Chelsea walks to me and takes the seat next to me. She sighs before replying. "I'm gay. I haven't dated a guy since your brother. I haven't told you because I didn't know how you would take it, you know with your family being super religious and all. And then the way you reacted when you found out that Carmen was gay. I was going to tell you tonight actually."

"I guess that's understandable, but Chelsea I love you. You are my best friend; I would never disown you just because you are gay. I actually wanted to talk to you about –" The fucking bell cut me off. I stood up and grab my bag. "We will finish this conversation after school. I'll see you at lunch, ok?"

"Yea sounds good. And maybe we can stop at the mall so that you can pick up a new phone." She laughs while giving me a hug.

I laugh. "Yea that would be a good idea. I'll see you later Chels." I turn around and go to my first class of the day.

I still can't believe that Chelsea didn't tell me that she was gay. I mean it has been a couple years since she's been with Glen. The signs were there though so I can't deny that. I saw how she treated Carmen and how they would sit so close but separate whenever I was around. How could I not know? I wonder if there are any other gay people that I don't know about.

I'm knocked out of my thoughts yet again.

"I thought after the first two times we bumped into each other, you would start watching where you were walking." The said and laughed. I know that voice.

I look up to see a smiling Ashley. Her nose is crinkling so I can tell it is the same real smile she gave me yesterday. Her voice is sexy, her smile is contagious, and she is gorgeous. Why does she have to be straight? I stop staring and laugh. "Yea sorry about that, I just have a lot on my mind lately."

"Is everything okay?" She asks with a concerned look on her face.

I barely know her. I can't just come out to her like that. But there is something about her that makes me want to tell her everything. On the other hand, she is straight, and she might be homophobic. Why does being gay have to be so hard?

"I-" Ring! Ring! Ring! I hate the fucking bell! "I'm late for class now." I sigh.

"Me too obviously." She blushes and giggles. "Wanna ditch?" Aww she seems nervous.

Snapping out of my day dreaming, I take in what she asked. I've never ditched school a day in my life. I can't just leave school like that.

I guess she notices my inner dilemma because she says "It will only be for first period, I mean we are already late."

She does have a point, we are already late. And I just remembered that I have a new schedule that I have to follow starting on Monday. I can just act like I thought I was supposed to start it today instead.

"Okay where do you want to go?" Gosh I've known her for less than twenty four hours and she already has me ditching school.

"There's this little playground right around the corner that I always go to when I just want to relax. We can go there." She says walking off the campus, with me following behind her.

We walk about ten minutes until we get the playground. She continues to walk until she gets to this huge oak tree, and sits down in the grass. I take a seat next to her and look around the park.

"So tell me about yourself Spencer." Ashley says out of nowhere.

"There's not much to know Ashley." I say leaning back on the tree trunk.

"Well what do you do for fun?" She says following me.

I sigh. "Not much really. I like listening to music and I like to write. Oh and I play basketball."

"Really? Why don't you play for the school?"

"As of today, I do." I smile.

She looks at me and smiles. "So that means, I will be seeing more of you." I give her a confused look. "You do know that I am the head cheerleader, right?"

And the light bulb goes off. "Oh yea I forgot about that." I laugh. "So you will be my cheerleader?" I say with a smirk and hoping that I won't cross any lines.

She laughs and nods. "Technically I will cheer for the team, but I can be your cheerleader if you like."

I blush like crazy. Is anyone else hot? "Well I guess I can share." I play it off.

"Have it your way." She smirks. All of this flirting is making me more upset that she is straight and she has a boyfriend. Wait why is she flirting when she has a boyfriend?

"You're dating Aiden right?" I ask suddenly while looking at her. She tenses a little.

"Yea…yea I am." She looks away.

"You sound so excited about that." I say sarcastically.

"He is a great guy. Anyone would be lucky to have him."

"Then what's the problem?"

She seems like she's lost in thought and having a debate with herself. Then she sighs. "There is no problem. So what's it like to be Glen's sister?"

I guess she didn't want to talk about that anymore. Oh well maybe she will tell me another time. "He gets annoying at times, but it could have been worse. I think if we weren't twins, we wouldn't have the same relationship that we do have."

She laughs and I look at her with a confused look. "You and Glen are twins?"

"Yea, I thought you knew that."

"No he just told me that you were his sister. You two seem so different; I would have never thought that you were twins."

"Different how?" I am really curious to know what she thinks about me.

"Well he is so…well…he's Glen. There's no other way to put that. And you, well you seem calm, relaxed, funnier, and a lot nicer." She laughs.

I blush a little. "I try."

We fall into a simple conversation and I lose track of time. I didn't notice how long we were out there until my stomach started grumbling.

"Oh wow, I guess we should get back to school. It is already lunch time." Ashley said looking at her phone.

I stand up abruptly and grab my bag. "It's already lunch?" I yell.

"Yea I guess we lost track of time, sorry."

My parents are going to freak out when they find out that I ditched most of the school day. Oh well I guess you have to break the rules sometimes. She stands up and we began to walk back to school.

"No it's ok. I should have checked the time myself. I'm usually more responsible." Then I remembered that my phone is broken. "Well I couldn't have checked the time if I wanted to, my phone broke when I dropped it today."

"At least you have an excuse to get a new phone."

"That's true. I have wanted to get a new one."

"See it all works out. And when you get your new phone, maybe you will be lucky enough to get my number." I turn to her and she winks at me. Gosh that's so hot. Is everything she does this hot?

"What makes you think I want your number?"

She laughs. "Because you like talking to me and if you had my number you would be able to talk to me anytime you wanted."

"I see you have no shame in hiding your ego. It reminds me of someone I know actually." I smile just thinking of LAbabe4u.

"Oh really? Who is that?"

I contemplate on whether or not I should tell her. Would she think it's weird that I have an online friend? I guess I will just have to find out.

"She's this girl that I m-"

"Hey Spence, congrats I saw that you made the team!" Glen says picking me up while giving me a hug. I didn't even realize that we made it to school already.

"Thanks Glen, you can put me down now."

He puts me down finally. "Oh sorry, I am just really excited. I knew you would make it." He notices that I am with Ashley. "Oh I see that you two hit it off." Hit it off? He says that like we were on a date or something.

"Yea I was nervous at first because I thought that anyone that was related to you would be crazy, but lucky for me, she isn't that bad." Ashley says with a smile. Wait one minute. Lucky for her? How does that make her lucky? And I'm not that bad?

"Not that bad?' I raise my eyebrow at her.

"I'm kidding Spence!" She exclaims. Glen and I both raise our eyebrows at her again.

"Spence?" Glen says. "How close are you two exactly?"

"Well…I…we…she" Ashley stutters. Aww that's so cute.

"Ashley it's ok. You can call me Spence, I like it." I blush a little.

"Is there something I should know?" Glen asks looking between me and Ashley.

"No. I have to meet Chelsea. Bye Glen, later Ashley." I say and walk away. That was close.

I get to the table and Chelsea and Carmen are sitting close together.

"Hey lovers." I smile as I take my seat across from them. They finally stay as they are and don't move as they did every other day.

Chelsea laughs and shakes her head. "Hey Spence."

"Hi Spencer." Carmen says. "Oh and sorry about just leaving earlier, I didn't know how you would react to what happened."

"It's ok I get it. If I was in that same situation I would probably just leave too." I smile.

I take out my lunch and start eating.

"Wait that's it? You aren't going to grill us?" Chelsea asks disbelievingly.

I laugh. "Oh no I am going to interrogate you, but I will do that later tonight." She gulps and I smile at her. Then I look at Carmen. "Oh Carmen are you busy tonight?"

"Uh well…Yea I have to-"

"Oh great so you can sleep over at Chelsea's with me." I clap my hands. "Tonight's going to be so much fun." They laugh and continue eating, I follow.

I feel someone looking at me so I look around the quad to see who is staring. My eyes land on Ashley. She is at the table with the rest of the cheerleaders. When I look at her she immediately looks down. I smile at her antics. She looks up again and smiles at me.

"What are you smiling at?" Chelsea said bringing my attention back to the table. I forgot that there were any other people here.

"N-Nothing." I take a bite of my sandwich. Chelsea just shrugs.

Feeling her eyes on me again, I look up towards Ashley's table and sure enough she is looking at me. She sticks her tongue out and I laugh.

"What's so funny Spencer?" Carmen asks. I snap my gaze away from Ashley to Carmen.

"N-nothing. Nothing at all."

"Bullshit! Spencer what is funny?' Chelsea says.

I mistakenly look towards Ashley's table, and Ashley is looking towards me. Both Chelsea and Carmen follow my eyes and they see Ashley looking this way. Shit this is not going to end well.

Chelsea turns to look at me again. "Is there something you want to tell me Spence?"

"No. Why would you think that?" I say innocently.

"Well you are smiling and laughing with Ashley Davies. That's not something you do every day. And since when did you two become friends?" She asks.

"We met yesterday before basketball try-outs." I shrug.

"You met yesterday and you are already laughing and smiling at each other? What am I missing?" Chelsea asks with a smirk on her face.

"Nothing we just hung out a little bit today." I wish I could say oh yea and I happen to really like her.

"You what?" Carmen asks.

I look at her confused. "We hung out?"

"And you said that you really liked her." Chelsea almost yells.

I said that out loud! Holy fuck, I'm screwed. "I mean I like her she is a really cool girl." That should work.

"Bullshit, you like her like her. As in I want to date her." Carmen says.

I look up at Ashley again and she is talking with some of the other cheerleaders. She seems happy and peaceful. I wish I could be over there with her. I wish it was me that she was smiling and laughing with.

"Is that true Spencer?" Chelsea asks me. I look at her. She is gay herself so what's the worst that could happen? I guess I will just have to see.

I sigh and brace myself for whatever's about to happen. I close my eyes. "I-I'm…I'm gay."

**A/N: Sorry it took me a while to update, but I just started classes again so I've been a little busy. Thanks for the reviews and favorites, you guys are awesome! I don't know where this story is going, it might take a while to update but I will finish this story. I don't like when people don't finish their stories so don't worry about that. Please tell me what you think, good or bad. Thank you!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Wow, thanks for the reviews. I was not expecting that many reviews, so thank you to those of you that did. I am glad that many of you love this story just as much as I do. Once again thanks for the reviews and keep reviewing!**

I open my eyes to see Chelsea spit out the drink that she just held to her mouth and Carmen laughed. I just wait for Chelsea to say something, anything at all.

"I told you!" Carmen says more like yells to Chelsea.

"What do you mean you told her? What did you tell her?" What the fuck is going on?

Carmen continues to laugh hysterically while Chelsea stares at me with her mouth open.

"Can one of you tell me what's going on?" I say getting a little angry.

After Carmen controls her laugher, she finally answers me. "I told Chelsea the first day that I met you that I thought you were gay. But she denied it and said that there was no way in hell that you were gay. Well where there's a will, there's a way." She laughs again.

"Since when?" Was all Chelsea could say.

"Well I started noticing girls a lot more over the past few weeks. I mean I guess I sort of always known." I shrug.

"Why are you just telling me this now?"

"Looks who's talking. You didn't even tell me, I had to catch you in the act." I say crossing my arms.

"Touché." She laughs. "But I had no idea. We really need to have a talk, and a long one at that!"

"Wait, so you're not mad or anything?" I really want to know what she thinks about it. I mean she is the first person I have told besides LAbabe4u.

"Why would I be mad? I mean sure I would have loved to have known sooner, but I am just glad that you trust me enough to come out to me. I know it's not easy."

"Did you not trust me enough to come out to me?"

She sighs and thinks about her answer; in the mean time I am getting worried.

"I trust you with my life, you are my best friend. But I know how your mother is, and I did not know how you would handle it. I didn't know if you disown me as a friend, and I like having you in my life." She replies truthfully.

I smile. "Aww Chels, that's the sweetest thing you've ever said to me. And just because my mom is a homophobic bitch, doesn't make me one too."

"Well I would hope not. I mean you can't really be gay and be homophobic as well." Carmen adds.

We nod our heads in agreement and continue eating lunch. After lunch I went to class with Chelsea, then gym. Coach said I could sit out because they weren't doing anything that I already knew. I just sat back turned my iPod on and watched the other girls play. That has been the best gym class yet.

After gym, I headed straight to the parking lot. I couldn't wait to get to the mall; not having a phone for a day really sucks.

As I am about to step foot into the parking lot, I hear Glen calling me over. What the hell does he want now? I make my way over and notice that he's with Aiden. For some reason, I am really starting not to like him anymore. Maybe it's because I like his girlfriend. Hmmm maybe.

"Yes Glen?" I say as I get closer to him.

"I told Mom and Dad about you making the team, and they were proud of course. They were talking about taking you out or something." He shrugs.

"Oh well just tell them that I'll be happy with a new phone, mine broke today."

"If I were you, I would milk it for all you can."

"Good thing I'm not you. Anyways I have to go." I say turning to leave.

"Where are you going?"

"First I'm going to mall, and then I'm staying the night at Chelsea's."

"Oh have fun." He turns back to Aiden and I walk away.

"Hey Spencer." I look up to see Ashley smiling at me.

"Hi Ashley. How was the rest of your day?"

"Pretty boring, how about yours?"

"Surprisingly without you it was very boring."

"Aww did you miss me?" She said in a teasing voice.

"Please why would I miss you? I missed making fun of you yea, but miss you? Now that is taking it too far." I joke.

She slaps my arm. "Your mean!"

"Yea yea so I'm told. But hey I have to go, so I will see you Monday or something."

"Where are you off to?"

"The mall, I have to get a new phone."

She plays with her hands a little and looks down. Why is she nervous? "Do you think maybe I could go with you? I mean I'm going out tonight and I need to get a new outfit." Aww that's cute, she was nervous to ask me to tag along. I swear everything she does is cute. "I mean if you don't want me to, that's f-"

"Ashley, slow down. Its fine, I don't care if you come, just as long as you don't mind Chelsea and Carmen coming too."

"Chelsea's cool and I'm going to assume that Carmen is the other girl you sit with at lunch."

"Yea she is, Stalker." I tease her.

"I'm not a stalker, I just happened to observe who you sit with at lunch."

"Right, let's go." I walk towards my car.

"Hold on, let me just tell Aiden that I'm not riding with him today." I nod and she turns to Glen and Aiden.

I can't hear what they are saying, but I get jealous when I see Ashley and Aiden hug. I start to smile again when she walks towards me.

"Ok show me the way." She links our arms and I can't help the butterflies I get when our skin touch. My smile just turned into a huge grin.

When we get to my car, I notice Chelsea and Carmen waiting for me.

"Took you long enough." Chelsea exaggerates.

"Yea well sorry, I brought company." I say holding up my arm that's linked with Ashley's.

"Oh hey Ashley, it's good to see you again." Chelsea says. "This is Carmen, Carmen this is Ashley." They shake hands.

"So who's ready to go to the mall?" I say excitedly.

"Carmen is riding with me so we will just meet you there."

"Ok see you there." I reply then get in my car, Ashley follows getting into the passenger seat.

"Nice car." She says looking around.

"Thanks, I got it for my 16th birthday last year." I pull out of the space and drive out of the parking lot. It's quiet so I pull out my IPod and hook it up to the radio. "Since you are the guest you can look through it and play what you like." I smile at her.

"Ok. Let's see if I can find anything good." She looks for a while. "Aha! So you do have good taste in music." Then I hear Rainbow by Jessie J begin to play. Can this girl be any more perfect?

"Jessie J is the best. If you don't have her on your IPod then you are missing out."

"I completely agree." She smiles at me. "It's rare that you get an artist that can really sing and make good songs as well."

"I know, I can't even remember how many times I've listened to her entire album."

Throughout the whole drive to the mall, we talk and argue about our different tastes in music. I pull into the mall and notice that it's not that crowded. I find Chelsea and park next to her.

We get out of the car and start walking towards the mall. Carmen grabs Chelsea's hand as soon as we enter the mall. Aww they are cute together. I'm glad that they aren't hiding their relationship. I wonder how Ashley feels about gay people. If she's homophobic, we are no longer friends. I look at Ashley and wait for a response. She looks at the happy couple holding hands and slightly smiles. I guess that's good.

"Are we going straight to get your phone or are we going to shop around first?" Chelsea says to me.

"Well Ashley wanted to get a new outfit, which is why she came with us so we can do that first or get my phone first. I don't have a preference."

"Let's get your phone, and then shop for clothes because I have a feeling that that will take a long time." Ashley says.

We made our way to the phone store and began to look at different phones. Of course Carmen and Chelsea wandered off in the store somewhere leaving Ashley and I alone, not that I'm complaining or anything.

"So you have no problem with Carmen and Chels being together?" I ask her as I play with this IPhone.

"No, why would I?"

"I don't know. There are some pretty homophobic people out there. I was just making sure that you aren't one of them."

She laughs. "I am definitely not homophobic so you have nothing to worry about."

That's good to know, if only she was in to girls as well.

"Have you found the one you want?" Chelsea says coming up behind me.

"Yea I think I'm just going to get the IPhone."

"Good choice, I have one and it's amazing." Ashley says with a smile. Her smile is so beautiful.

"Alright I'll be back." I went in the line and paid for my new phone. Walking back to the girls, I noticed how Ashley seems comfortable with Chelsea and Carmen and she just met them today. More points for her.

"Here Chels put your number in it." I gave her my phone. After she was done she handed it to Carmen. I guess I'll have her number too. I wonder if Ashley will give me her number. When Carmen was done she just handed the phone to Ashley without looking up.

"I knew you wanted my number." She laughs.

"I didn't tell you to put it in my phone." I argue.

"True, but you didn't stop me either." She smirks and I roll my eyes at her but don't say anything. "That's what I thought." I grab my phone from her when she finishes.

"So where to now?" Carmen asks.

"Now we shop!" Ashley exclaims and claps her hands. I shake my head and walk out the store.

"What occasion are we shopping for?" Chelsea inquires.

"I'm going to a club tonight and I need a new outfit." Ashley answers.

"Really? Who are you going with?" Chelsea asks again. Damn she is nosey.

"I was going with Aiden, but he ditched me, so now it's just me." Aww I feel bad for her, but she doesn't seem too upset about it.

"He ditched you? Wow what a lousy boyfriend." I utter.

"It's ok I go to the club by myself all the time."

"Nonsense we are going with you." Of course Chelsea would volunteer everyone to go.

"No it's ok, really."

"You do not want to argue with her, trust me." Carmen says and we laugh.

"Ok, but just to warn you, I have never been there so it might suck." Ashley replies.

We continue walking and something hits me.

"How am I going to get in, unlike the rest of you I'm not 18 yet? And I don't have a fake ID either."

"Don't worry about it. I can practically get anyone in anywhere." Ashley says with a shrug.

"How?" I am really curious as to how she can get a minor in a club.

"It's the perks of having a rock star dad." She smiles.

"Yes, we are going out tonight." Carmen declares.

At the first store only Carmen was able to find an outfit. The next store Chelsea found a cute red dress that fits her perfectly.

"I'm sick of trying on clothes." I announce.

"Well you still need an outfit, and we only have one more store so suck it up." Chelsea smacks my arm.

"Ow! Fine let's go." I sulk to the last store. They better have something I like.

We look around a little bit, and I find nothing so I sit by the dressing rooms. The dressing room that is right in front of me opens, and Ashley comes out. Well, damn! She has on black short shorts that could pass as underwear and blue halter top. I can't stop looking even if I wanted to. Her legs just go on for days.

"Spencer!" I snap my eyes up to Ashley's face. "Finally, I've been calling you for like five minutes." She straightens out the shirt. "So what do you think? Do you like it?" I can't seem to form one coherent thought right now, so the only thing I did was nod. She looks in the mirror again. "It's cute, but I don't know if it's right for me." She turns around to look at the back in the mirror. She sighs then looks at me. Suddenly she smiles. "This shirt would look perfect on you. The color would definitely bring out your eyes. I'm going to take this off and I want you to try it on." She rushes back into the dressing room before I could say anything.

"Is Ashley still trying on clothes?" Chelsea says from behind me.

"Yea she didn't like her top so she's making me try it on."

"Is it that blue halter top?"

"Yea, why?" I question. Where is she going with this?

"I found the perfect white mini skirt to go with it. You will look great in it." Chelsea then grabs my arm and pushes me into the other empty dressing room. "I'll get the shirt for you, just try on the skirt." I change into the extra small skirt and the shirt that Chelsea throws over the door. It actually looks good. I wonder what Ashley will think. I can't go five minutes without thinking about her. I don't know if that's a good or bad thing yet. I open the door and wait for the judges' response.

"You look hot, Spence." I blush.

"If I wasn't already with Chelsea, I would definitely be all over you cause damn girl." Carmen exclaims and Chelsea slaps her arm. "What?" Chelsea just shakes her head.

While they talk or argue, I look at Ashley for her response. Her eyes seem to have gotten darker and her mouth is just open.

"What do you think Ashley?" I ask hoping to get a good response. She doesn't say anything; the only answer I get is a head nod with her mouth still open. I grin. This is definitely the right outfit. "I'm glad you like it." I say to Ashley then turn into the dressing room to change again.

Ashley found a white vest to go with the black shorts she was wearing before. All I know is that I can't wait to see it on her. We paid for our clothes and left the mall.

"So Ashley what's the name of the club we are going to tonight?" Chelsea says.

"I think it's called Rage or something like that." Ashley seems a little uncomfortable, I wonder why.

"Rage in West Hollywood?" Carmen asked with her eyes bugged out. What's so crazy about this Rage club?

"Yea that's it. Why is it not a good club?" Ashley questions.

"Yea it's a great club. But you do know that it's a gay club right?" Carmen states.

Ashley plays with her hands again; I guess that's a nervous habit of hers. Wait why was she going to a gay club.

"Y-yea. Is that a problem?"

"No but I never would have thought that you would go to a gay club. I mean you are straight with a boyfriend." Carmen answers.

"I like all types of clubs, besides fewer guys hit on me at gay clubs and the music is always great so it's a win win." Ashley smiles and the butterflies return.

"I guess we are going to a gay club tonight." I say nervously. Tonight is definitely going to be interesting.

**A/N: I don't really like this chapter, but I hope all of you do. The next chapter should be better. Let me know what you think as always. And thanks again for the amazing reviews.**


	9. Chapter 9

"So what's the plan, we have a few hours to kill before going to the club tonight." Carmen asks as she stands against Chelsea's car.

"I vote that we get something to eat, I'm starving." Ashley says patting her stomach.

"Yea me too, I want pasta." I agree.

"Ok we can go to the Olive Garden that's right down the street." Chelsea suggests.

"Sounds good to me." I add as I get into my car. "We'll see you there in 5 minutes." I close my door, and look to the passenger seat to see Ashley already sitting there. "Ready?"

She looks at me and smiles. "Let's go."

I start the car up and pull out of the spot. I take one more look at Ashley and she has a small frown on her face as she looks down at her phone. I wonder why she's upset. She sighs, and then turns off her phone.

"Everything ok?" I ask now paying attention to the road.

"Yes it's just that usually at this time, I would be talking to a friend but they are busy and I miss them. It's pathetic I know but I can't help it." She sighs again. I guess she's talking about Aiden. I mean he is her boyfriend. Why do I have to crush on straight girls?

"It's not pathetic, it's cute." I blush realizing that I just called her cute. "How long have you and Aiden been together?" Her smile falls when I ask her this. Why doesn't she like to talk about their relationship? Maybe she just doesn't feel comfortable enough with me to talk about it.

"We've been together for about 2 years." She replies with no emotion.

"Oh cool." I say dropping the subject. Thank goodness we are here. "Are you ready to eat?" I ask when I find a parking spot.

"Yes, I'm so hungry." We get out of the car and walk inside and notice that Chelsea and Carmen are already there. We go and sit next to them.

I hear a beeping sound coming from my pants pocket. That's a gross ringtone, I need to change that. I take it out and notice that it's my mother calling. Shit, she probably found out about me skipping class.

"I'm going to take this outside." I say as I walk out the doors. "Hello?"

"Spencer, why weren't you in the first four periods today?" Way to get to the point.

"I got my new schedule and I thought I was supposed to start today. I didn't find out until lunch, but I did go to the right last two classes."

She huffs. "I guess that makes sense but don't let this happen again."

"I know, it won't." I roll my eyes.

"Ok and congratulations on making the team, I knew you would make it." Oh now she wants to be nice.

"Thanks, but I have to go, we are at Olive Garden and our table is ready."

"Ok have fun, I'll see you tomorrow."

"Ok bye mom." I hung up and put my phone in my pocket again.

When I walk inside, I see Ashley still sitting in the waiting area. She is still playing with her phone.

"Where are Chelsea and Carmen?" I ask. She jumps a little; I guess she didn't see me walk in.

"They are at the table; I thought I would come back and wait for you so I could show you to the table." She smiles at me. She is so sweet.

"Thank you." I smile back. She stands up and I follow her. I let my eyes roam over her body. I can't help but look, she is so hot. She stops and I look up at her quickly, hoping that she didn't see me staring. I notice that we are at a booth and the lovers are sitting on one side, which means that I get to sit next to Ashley. She slides in first and I follow, leaving a few inches in between us although I would rather be closer. We take a minute to look over the menu and the waitress comes to take our order.

"What are your plans for the rest of the weekend?" Chelsea asks, again with the fucking questions.

"Nothing really, I'll probably go home and pass out after the club tonight. Then do some homework tomorrow." She shrugs.

"You should stay at my house tonight, Carmen and Spencer are. I mean if you want to, but it will be fun." Chelsea says excitedly. I glare at her. Why would she invite her if she knows I like her? If she wasn't with Aiden, this would be a great thing, but no she is taken so nothing can happen between us.

"Sure I have nothing else to do and I like hanging out with all of you." Ashley looks at me and smiles when she says the last part. Cue butterflies. This night is going to be even longer than what I thought before.

The waitress came back with our food and we eat while talking in between. After eating we decide to go to Chelsea's house and watch some movies before leaving for the club.

"Which movie should we watch?" Chelsea asks as we sit on the couch.

"I want to watch Love and Basketball!" I yell.

Chelsea rolls her eyes. "You always want to watch that movie, I'm sick of it."

"It's a great movie." I sigh. "I want a love like that one day."

"I agree it's one of my favorites. It's amazing how love can last even after so much came between them." Ashley adds while looking at me. We just sit there and stare at each other.

"You two would make a cute couple." Carmen breaks us out of our staring contest. I smile inwardly at her comment.

"So what movie did you decide on?" I ask choosing not to acknowledge what Carmen said.

"We are watching I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry. I feel like laughing." Chelsea puts the movie in and takes a seat next to Carmen. They cuddle with each other, while Ashley and I sit with this distance between us.

I woke up to someone stroking my hair. I open my eyes and realize that I am lying down half on the couch and the other half on someone. I look up and see Ashley smiling at me. I sit up and stretch.

"Sorry I feel asleep on you."

"It's ok, I didn't want to wake you up but it's time to get ready. Carmen and Chelsea are getting ready right now. We have to go take our showers now."

"Together?" I smirk at her.

She laughs. "If you're sure you can handle seeing me naked." My eyes bug out of my head and I gulp.

"I'm gonna go shower." I say before I practically run up the stairs. Now I have visions of us taking a shower together. I definitely need a cold shower now. I don't think I would be able to handle seeing her naked, not yet at least.

I went to Chelsea's guest room, which is my room when I stay here, and took a shower. When I got out I noticed that someone put my clothes on the bed for me. After getting dressed, I went to Chelsea's room because I didn't have any of my make up with me and I needed to borrow hers.

I opened the door and I didn't see anyone there, so I decided to look in the bathroom.

"Hey Chels do y- oh shit, I'm so sorry." I went to close the door but she grabbed it and held it open.

"It's ok Spencer, we are both girls, we have the same parts." She laughed. "And besides it's not like I'm completely naked all I have to do is put my shirt on."

I have my hands covering my eyes. "I know but I just walked in on you. I'm going to find Chelsea." I try to leave but she stops me.

"You can stay; I have my shirt on now." I open my eyes and she was still in a bra. Holy fuck look at those abs. And her breasts look perfect in her bra. I just realized I was staring a little bit too long.

"Aww are you blushing, that's so cute." I look at her face and she's smiling at me.

"N-no I was just leaving." I turn to leave again, and yet again she stops me.

"I have my top on now, no worries." I turn to look at her again and she still looks hot. Her bra is showing through her vest, and her vest doesn't cover her stomach all the way so her abs are definitely showing. "Like what you see?"

"Y-you look hot. I mean good! You look nice." I sputtered out. That is so embarrassing.

"Thank you, so do you." She smirked at me. Do I look hot, good, or nice? "Why were you looking for Chelsea?"

"Oh I don't have my make-up and I wanted to borrow some of hers."

"Oh I have some that I always keep with me. I could do your make-up if you want." She offered.

I hesitated. "Ok, thanks." I walked in Chelsea's bedroom and sat on her bed.

She came closer to me and put the make up next to me on the bed. When she came closer to me my breath hitched. I immediately felt the warmth that radiated off of her body. She smelled so good; I know that I will never forget this smell. It's hard to describe, so I won't even try. It's just Ashley.

While she is bending over, I can't help but look at her boobs. They are so luscious. I wonder how she would react if I touched them. I have always wondered what it was like to touch another girl's breasts. Ashley's would be perfect for me to get my first experience with. Her boobs look supple and perky, basically perfect.

"Finish, go see how it looks in the bathroom." Ashley said standing up straight. Dang I had a good view. I stood up and went to the bathroom. She definitely has skills. My eyes look amazing. I might have to ask her to do my make-up more often.

"I look good, thank you Ashley." I gave her a hug.

"Hey are y-" Chelsea said coming in the bathroom and we break away from our hug. Damn you, Chelsea! "Oh sorry I didn't mean to interrupt. I just wanted to see if you two were ready to go."

"I'm ready, Ashley just finished my make-up." I respond and leave the bathroom to sit on the bed.

"I'm ready too; we can leave if everyone's ready." Ashley said.

Ten minutes later we were in Chelsea's car headed to West Hollywood. And yes I was sitting in the back with Ashley, but this time there was nothing separating us. I was sitting as close as I could get to the door and she was right next to me, legs touching and all. I wasn't complaining, but how would you feel if the person you liked was sitting this close to you? Exactly.

"Are we almost there?" I ask again.

"We will be there in like five minutes, chill Spence." Chelsea said to me.

"Fine." I looked down at my phone. I went through the apps just to see what I could find. I suddenly got an idea. I looked at Ashley to see if she was watching, she was talking to Carmen about something. I typed in the name of the Gay Chat website just to see if there was an app for it.

"No Way!" I yelled. Oops. Everyone gave me a questioning look. "I just didn't know that they had an app for uh uh Twitter." I hope that was convincing. They looked at me again before returning back to their conversation. I quickly downloaded the app.

"We're here!" Chelsea said as she parked the car. Aww I didn't even get to see if LAbabe4u was on. I'll just check later.

We step out of the car and walk straight up to the front of the club. There is a long ass line, I'm glad Ashley can just get us in. After she talked to the bouncer for a minute, he let us all in. I have never been to a club, let alone a gay club, so I am anxious to see how it is.

When I walk in I immediately see the dance floor that is already packed with people and the bar right next the entrance. I also notice that it is foggy and dark, the only light coming from is a few strobe lights. There were big screens with music videos playing on them. And I'm guessing that there are more rooms to this place because people are walking back and forth through two doors.

"We're going to dance, later!" Chelsea called over her shoulder as Carmen led her to the dance floor.

"Do you want to get a drink?" Ashley asks already walking to the bar. I guess so. I could use a little alcohol to loosen up a bit.

When I got to the bar, Ashley was already handing me a drink. "What is this?"

"Just try it." She replies before taking a sip of her own drink.

I hold the glass up to my mouth and take a sip. I'm sure the face I made was priceless when I first tasted whatever this is. It tastes like straight up liquor. Ashley of course laughed at my reaction.

"That's not funny, what the hell is this?" I demand.

She continues to laugh before replying. "The Incredible Hulk." She continues to laugh. Well that explains the color.

"What's in it?"

"Hennessey and Hpnotiq." She says and then downs the rest of her drink.

"You gave me straight alcohol?" I exclaim.

"Yea I thought it would get you to come out of your shell and dance tonight." She turns to the bar and order more drinks. I chug the rest of my drink and put it on the bar.

"Spencer?" I hear someone call. "Spencer is that you?" I turn to see Kendra coming towards me. I didn't think I would see anyone from school here.

"Hey Kendra!" I smile as she finally stops in front of me. And damn she looks good. She is wearing a skin tight black dress that shows a lot of cleavage. Fuck it just got hotter in here.

"I never thought I would see you in a gay club." She smirks at me probably noticing that I checked her out.

"I just came here with some friends actually." As I say this, Ashley comes up to me. She hands me a shot and then looks at Kendra.

"What are you doing here?" Ashley said in a bored tone. Do they know each other?

"I came here to have fun Ashley. What is little miss straight girl doing in a gay club?" Kendra replied with an emphasis on straight. Ok I'm officially confused now.

"How do you two know each other?" I ask looking between them.

"That's not important. Here I got you another shot." Ashley says and hands me a shot of clear liquid. I don't ask questions this time, I just down the shot. Fuck that burned.

"So Spencer do you want to dance?" Kendra asks completely ignoring Ashley's presence.

"I would, but I don't want to leave Ashley alone."

"I'll be fine Spence, go have fun." Ashley says with an unreadable expression. She hands me the shot in her hand. "Here you might need it." I down the shot quickly and already I am feeling a buzz.

"You ready?" Kendra asks me. I nod and she grabs my hand and leads me to the dance floor.

When we make our way further into the crowd, she stops and turns me around so that my back is pressing against her front. She places her hands on my waist and we start moving to the beat. She presses her body more into me and I grind into her. We stay like this for a few songs. I get tired and try to move but Kendra keeps me in place.

"We have an audience." She whispered in my ear. I look around to see what she is talking about. I find Ashley staring at us from across the room as some girl dances on her. Even though we aren't together, I immediately get jealous. While staring at Ashley, I begin to grind into Kendra again, this time with a lot more emotion. Ashley puts her arms around the girl's waist and pulls her more into her and moves her hips with the girl's movement.

We stared at each other while we danced with our partners. I turn my head when moves her hands to my stomach. I look back up and Ashley is gone. A few seconds later I feel Kendra move and another body behind me. I smirk when I smell Ashley's perfume. We danced for a few songs until we got tired. After the last song, she grabbed my hand and walked me towards the bar. I can't help but notice how perfectly our hands fit together.

We get to the bar and Ashley orders two waters. Thank god, I don't think my body needs anymore alcohol right now. She hands me the water and I drink it in one shot.

"There you two are, we have been looking for you for forever." Chelsea says from behind me. I turn to see her and a tired looking Carmen.

"We were dancing the entire time." I respond.

"Oh. Well are you ready to go, we are exhausted." Carmen says tiredly.

"Yea sure let's go." Ashley grabs my hand again and we walk outside.

We get in the back again, and like before Ashley sits extremely close to me. At some point during the ride, she puts her head on my shoulder and I smile.

When we get to the house, I change in Chelsea's guest room. As soon as I finish, the door opens.

"Hey Chelsea told me that I had the option of sleeping in here or on the couch." Ashley comes in looking a little nervous.

I laugh. "Oh did you want me to get you a blanket, it can get kind of cold in her living room."

"Haha very funny, I am sleeping right in this bed with you." She says as she plops down on the bed. Why am I all of sudden nervous?

"I hope you don't snore. If you do I will kick you out."

"Shut up and get in the bed already." She laughs and I get under the blankets next to her. "I knew I would get you in bed tonight."

I laugh. "Go to bed Ashley."

"Night Spencer."

"Good night Ash…ley." I blush as I almost called her Ash.

"You can call me Ash if you want." She giggles.

"Night Ash." I smile.

**A/N: So sorry for the late update, I try to post a chapter once every week. This week has been crazy. My homework never ends. And today I just found out that Peyton Manning will be out for the season. So yea I did not have a good week, but there is always next week. Thanks for the reviews, they are awesome as always. I am almost at 100 already, so thanks so much. Continue to read and review!**


	10. Chapter 10

"Wake up bitches; we are going out for breakfast!" I hear Chelsea yell effectively waking me up from my peaceful sleep.

"Later" I mumble with my eyes still closed.

I turn to the other side of the bed, and when I do I feel a hand around my waist pull me back. I quickly open my eyes at this gesture. I look behind me and see Ashley with her hair a mess and eyes shut. She looks so adorable, I can just sit here and watch her sleep all day, you know in the non-creepy way. I hear someone clear their throat and I look up at the door. Both Carmen and Chelsea are standing there with matching smirks. I just roll my eyes at them and lay back down.

"Uh no get your ass up, I'm hungry." This time that was Carmen. They really know how to ruin my cuddle time, bitches.

"Ten more minutes, Aiden" Ashley whines. And that officially ruined cuddle time.

"Ashley wake up" I slightly nudge her. She opens her eyes at the sound of my voice. She starts smiling until suddenly she gets a worried look on her face. She moves her arm from around me suddenly.

"I am so sorry Spencer; I guess I moved during the night."

I laugh at how worried she seems to be. "It's really ok Ash, I slept good last night so no complaints here." That seems to relax her and the worried look she was wearing is now gone.

"This is cute and all, but can we go now?" Carmen asks impatiently from the door.

"Alright alright we are up, calm down." I said as I made my way to the bathroom.

About a half hour later, we were in the car and on our way to Denny's. This time I was driving, so Ashley in the passenger seat with the lovers in the back.

At Denny's, I sat next to Ashley of course and yet again she sat closer than most friends would. I just do not understand her. I mean does she know how I feel about her? But she is straight, so wouldn't she freak out if she found out that I liked her? I am so confused.

"So did you get any numbers from some hot girls last night Spencer?" Carmen blurts out. I stare at her with my eyes bugged out and Chelsea hits her side. "What?" I put my head in my hands and wait for what happens.

"Ashley didn't know that Spencer was into girls, you just outed her!" Chelsea all but yells at Carmen.

Carmen's eyes go wide. "Oh shit, I thought Ashley knew already! I am so sorry Spencer."

"It's ok Carmen; I mean she was going to find out eventually." I sigh and wait for Ashley to say something, just anything.

"Spencer" Ashley said to me. I turn my head to face her. "Did you think I wouldn't want to be your friend anymore or something?"

I shrug my shoulders "I don't know, I didn't really know what to expect."

"I don't care that you're gay, I like you for you not for who you like. Even though we've only been friends for about two days, I can tell we will be friends for a really long time." She smiles at me and I return it.

"Thank you Ashley. I was just worried because no one really knows, I mean not even Glen knows." I admit.

"Well your secret is safe with me."

"Thank you." I smile at her. The rest of breakfast consisted of me just sitting there realizing that maybe being gay wasn't as hard as I thought it would be.

After breakfast, we got back in the car and headed towards Chelsea's house. Five minutes into the drive, Ashley's phone started ringing.

"Hello…I'm still with Spencer, Chelsea, and Carmen…I don't know why…Can't it wait until later?" She seems to be getting mad with whoever is on the other line. I'm happy that she seems to want to stay with us, but I have a feeling that she is about to leave. "What happened…fine Aiden, I will be there soon…yea whatever…bye." She slammed her phone down on her lap and sighed.

"Is everything ok?" I question. It seems like something was seriously wrong.

"Yes, but Aiden needs to talk to me about something. Do you mind dropping me off at his house?" She asks so sweetly, how can I deny her anything?

"Yea, no problem."

"Thanks, Spence."

The ride is silent for the entire fifteen minutes to Aiden's house, so that means I had time to think. And I came to realize that I really hate a lot of things right now. I really hate that she is leaving so soon. I really hate that she is straight. And I really hate that she is with Aiden.

I pull up to his house and my knuckles are white from gripping the steering wheel so hard. Releasing my hands from the steering wheel, I put the car in park.

"Thank you for dropping me off."

"No problem."

"I had fun yesterday, we should do it again." She said only looking at me.

Chelsea, of course chooses this moment to jump in the conversation, "We definitely should!" Ashley then tore her gaze away from me and looked in the back at Carmen and Chelsea.

"Thank you for letting me stay over last night." She said to Chelsea. "And it was nice meeting you, Carmen." Aww how polite is she? "I'll see you at school on Monday, bye." Ashley said looking at me and then got out of the car. I watched her until she got to the door.

"So where to now?" I ask looking in the rearview mirror.

"To my place, we still need to have a little talk." Chelsea said with a grin.

"Oh good, I get to grill you two now." I smile and pull out of Aiden's driveway.

When we finally made our way back to Chelsea's house ten minutes later and I already missed Ashley. It's pathetic, I know.

"When did you know you were gay Chelsea?" I ask when we sat in the living room.

"Umm while I was dating your brother actually, that's why you haven't seen me with anyone since him."

"That does explain a lot. How did you know?"

She sighed and kind of looked embarrassed to say. And now I was really curious to see what she was going to say. She mumbled something, but I had no idea what she said. Carmen just started laughing, and that only made me want to know even more.

"Babe you will have to speak up, I don't think Spencer heard you." Carmen said in between laughs.

"I said, I realized it when I started looking at you in a more than friendly way." She said quickly. My eyes widened and I opened my mouth to say something but nothing came out. "At first I just ignored it, but then it started happening almost every time I saw you."

Finally finding my voice I say, "What? Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't tell you because I didn't know how you would react. I mean you know how your mother is. I thought that you felt the same way she did. And imagine if I did tell you, do you think we would still be best friends?"

"Oh." I said and then thought for a minute. "Wait, do you still feel that way? Do you still look at me like that?"

She laughs. "Uh no, I've been over that. I mean you are hot and all, but that's as far as it goes. Besides, Carmen is the only woman I need." Chelsea smiles and lays her head on Carmen's shoulder.

"Aww you are so sweet baby." Carmen coos and kisses Chelsea's head.

"So cute" I say sarcastically. "So how did you two end up together? I saw the signs but I thought nothing of it."

"What do you mean you saw the signs?" Carmen asks raising an eyebrow at me.

"Well on your first day at King you sat with us at lunch and I'm assuming that Chelsea invited you, which was odd because as you know she isn't that friendly. Then she shared her lunch with you which was strange because she slapped the shit out of me one day when I tried to take some of her chips. Oh and let's not forget that whenever I came to the lunch table, you two would separate from each other. Shall I continue?" I end with a sly grin on my face.

"No I think we get it." Carmen laughs.

"Well she was in my art class on the first day of class and there was just something about her that made me want to get to know her. So after class we talked a little bit and we had a lot in common. I invited her to lunch and from then on we've kind of been inseparable." Chelsea smiles at Carmen.

"That's cute. I'm happy for you two." I say with a small smile. I can't help but feel sad that I don't have anyone really special in my life.

"Thanks, now it's my turn to interrogate you." Chelsea says with a smile. "First off, when did you realize that you happen to like girls?"

"Well like the first day back at school, I started noticing girls more. Like I noticed how I admired their bodies, and soft skin. Then I realized that I was definitely checking a lot of the girls out in the locker room." I blush as I say this.

"That's why you stopped complaining about having to take gym?" Chelsea questions.

"Yes that's exactly why I had no problem with it anymore." I smile wide.

"So what's going on between you and Ashley?" Carmen says like she's been waiting to ask me that for a while.

"What do you mean?"

"Don't act like you don't know what I'm talking about. You already told us that you like her." Chelsea says.

"Yes I like her, but I'm not sure if she likes me or not. It seems like she is always flirting with me. But on the other hand, she is straight with a boyfriend. I'm so confused; I don't even know what to do about her." I let out a breath that I didn't know I was holding.

"Ugh I hate when straight girls do that. It's like stop playing with my head." Carmen says. I'm guessing something like this happened before with her.

"And I think she was jealous last night at the club."

"Why, what happened at the club?" Chelsea asks.

"Well do you know Kendra Wilson from school?" Chelsea nods. "Well she was there and we were dancing. I saw Ashley dancing with some other girls so I started getting more into my dance with Kendra. I guess Ashley was jealous because she grabbed the girl and pulled her closer while she was looking directly at me."

"Oh wow, I don't know about that one. Did that go on for the rest of the night?" I was about to answer but I get cut off by Carmen.

"Ok first before we go on to the Ashley situation, is there anything going on with you and Kendra?" Carmen asks.

"Not really I met her at the try-outs and we exchanged numbers. But anyone with eyes can see that she's hot. If I didn't like Ashley so much, I would definitely be all over her."

"It's always good to have a backup plan." Carmen says with a smile. "But anyways, back to Ashley. Did this whole make each other jealous thing go on all night?"

"No because after our staring competition, she came up behind me and we danced." I get shivers now just thinking about how good her body felt pressed up against mine.

"Oh she definitely likes you." Carmen says with a grin.

"How do you know that?" I ask seriously. I mean I really want to know.

"Ok well there are many signs. One being the way she looked at you when you came out of the dressing room, two is how all of her attention seems to be on you even though other people are around, um she always sits extra close to you whenever she does sit next to you, and –"

"Ok ok ok I get it. So she may a have a little girl crush on me, but she has a boyfriend!" I put my head back on the couch.

"I think we should test her." Chelsea says in a mischievous tone.

I pick my head up and give her a confused look. "What do you mean test her?"

"She obviously seems to like you, so we are going to get her to do something about it." Chelsea says smiling the entire time.

**A/N: Thank you for the reviews! Let me know as always what you think of the chapter! The next post will hopefully be next week. **


	11. Chapter 11

"Hey Spencer did you have fun at Chelsea's?" My mom asks when I walk through the door.

"Yup" was my simple reply and I walk straight to the stairs.

"Wait!" I let out a loud breath and turn around. "What happened to your old phone? Glen said you needed to buy a new one."

"I dropped and it broke." I really don't feel like talking to her right now, so I race up the stairs before she gets the chance to reply. I am still pissed at her how she acted when she found out that I had a gay friend, like seriously Paula get over it. She's gay; it's not going to kill you.

I get to my room and decide to go for a run. I have a lot on my mind, and normally I would write in my journal, but today I don't want to be in the house so a run sounds good right about now. After changing into shorts and a sports bra, I run out the house to avoid any more conversations.

Any other time I go for a run, I would take my IPod, but today I have so much already on my mind that I have no need for music.

I think about how Paula will react to finding out that I am gay. I know she won't be happy and throw me a coming out party, that's for sure. I know my dad will be fine because he's a therapist and he talks to teens about this all the time. I guess she will just have to accept it, because one day I will bring a girlfriend home to meet my family.

Speaking of girlfriends, I start to smile when I think of Ashley. I really like her and it sucks that she is with Aiden. If she wasn't I don't know if anything would happen between us or not. I mean she is straight but she does flirt with me all the time. It is just so confusing with her.

LAbabe4u on the other hand is straight up, in a way. She's gay but she is kind of in the closet. I wish I knew her personally. She has an amazing personality and I always laugh whenever I talk to her, just like when I'm with Ashley. It sucks that I will never meet her because I would have more of a chance with her than I do with Ashley.

And then there's Kendra. She is hot and she seems interested, so why not go for it, right? I could use some experience with other girls. I just realized that I don't know much about her other than the fact that she plays ball and she is a lesbian. Maybe if I get to know her, I will like her as much as I like Ashley.

I look up and noticed that I am only a few houses down from my house. I guess I made it around the block already. I pick up my pace and head into the house.

I take an extra-long shower and let the hot water run down my body. After my shower I change into something comfortable. As I turn on my TV, I hear my phone go off. I look at it and notice that there's a notification from the Gay Chat app that I downloaded last night.

**LAbabe4u:** Hey

**SLC823:** Hi! How are you doing?

**LAbabe4u:** I'm good and you?

**SLC823:** I just came back from a nice run, and now I'm relaxing.

**LAbabe4u:** I wish I could relax. I'm at my 'boyfriend's' house because he had some dilemma.

**SLC823:** You say it like it's not a big deal. Is he ok?

**LAbabe4u:** Yea he is fine, well he will be once he calms down.

**SLC823:** That's good, right?

**LAbabe4u:** Yea but I might kill him first.

**SLC823:** geesh that's harsh.

**LAbabe4u:** Yea I know but he interrupted me when I was out.

**SLC823: **What were you doing?

**LAbabe4u:** Well there's this girl

**SLC823:** Say no more, I can do without the details

**LAbabe4u:** But that's thing, we weren't doing anything.

**SLC823:** Wait what? Are pigs flying?

**LAbabe4u:** Haha funny. But I'm serious, I actually like this girl.

**SLC823:** Whoa, that's a first.

**LAbabe4u:** I know and she doesn't even know that I like her.

**SLC823:** Wait so this is the first girl you actually don't want to just fuck and you haven't told her yet?

**LAbabe4u:** Nope

**SLC823: **Well why not?

**LAbabe4u:** Well it's complicated

**SLC823:** I have time. Explain.

**LAbabe4u:** Well you know how everyone at my school thinks I'm straight?

**SLC823:** yea and?

**LAbabe4u:** She goes to my school, and she thinks I'm straight

**SLC823:** Ohh. Do you know if she's gay or straight?

**LAbabe4u:** She's gay. I just found out today actually

**SLC823:** ohh. Why didn't you tell her then too? I mean she had the guts to tell you.

**LAbabe4u:** Yea I know but I was afraid. I mean she thinks I'm completely straight with a boyfriend. She will think that I'm a liar and will probably never talk to me again.

**SLC823: **I'm sure that if you explained to her then she will understand.

**LAbabe4u:** I hope so. I have a lot to think about.

**SLC823:** You and me both. That's why I went on my run.

**LAbabe4u:** I thought you usually wrote when you needed to think.

**SLC823:** Aww you remembered! And yea I usually do, but my mom is here and I didn't want to stay here.

**LAbabe4u:** Oh understandable. I never have that problem though. I'm always home alone if the 'boyfriend' is over.

**SLC823:** I'm sorry. Don't you get lonely?

**LAbabe4u:** Yea but I can't really do anything about it.

**SLC823:** I'll come visit you one day!

**LAbabe4u:** Lol one day. So how did it go with your friend?

**SLC823: **Oh wow. It was good. We went clubbing and had a nice talk today.

**LAbabe4u:** Oh which club?

**SLC823:** Rage in West Hollywood

**LAbabe4u:** Seriously?

**SLC823:** Yea why? Is that bad or something?

**LAbabe4u:** No but I was there too.

**SLC823:** Are you kidding me? We could have met up!

**LAbabe4u:** I know! Next time you go to a club let me know and maybe we can meet up.

**SLC823:** Yes we need to. You owe me a dance.

**LAbabe4u:** I owe you?

**SLC823: **That's what I wrote.

**LAbabe4u:** You are demanding Oprah.

**SLC823:** I know but you love it anyway.

**LAbabe4u:** haha this is true. I've always had a thing for you.

**SLC823:** I knew it! We could have been together a long time ago if you would have said something Gayle.

**LAbabe4u:** I know but Stedman was always in the way.

**SLC823:** Well he is gone now so we have nothing to worry about.

**LAbabe4u:** The way I've always wanted it.

**SLC823:** Lol you are silly.

**LAbabe4u:** But you wouldn't have me any other way.

**SLC823: **Very true. What would I do without you?

**LAbabe4u:** Nothing, you would die.

**SLC823:** Dramatic much?

"Spencer, dinner!" I hear from downstairs. I sigh and look back at the phone.

**LAbabe4u:** That's me!

**SLC823:** Cute. But I have to go. Will you be on later?

**LAbabe4u:** No, I'm going out tonight

**SLC823:** I thought you liked that girl?

**LAbabe4u:** I do, I'm just going with my 'boyfriend' I don't want to go. I would talk to you all night if I could.

**SLC823:** aww. I don't know how you do it, but you always seem to make me blush.

**LAbabe4u:** lol that's just one of my talents.

**SLC823: **I'm sure you have many of those.

**LAbabe4u:** Wouldn't you like to know?

**SLC823:** I have to go actually. I'll talk to you later.

**LAbabe4u:** Haha later Oprah

**SLC823:** bye Gayle

I put my phone on my bed and go downstairs for dinner. During dinner, I thought about how jealous I felt when LAbabe4u told me about this girl that she likes. I mean I shouldn't feel jealous because we aren't together; I just like her a lot. I think this is the girl that will make her change her ways as she told me before. I just wish that girl were me.

Monday was the day that the plan would begin, and finally the day has come. When I pull up to the school, I see a few other cars there already. I get out and walk over to our normal table in the quad and see Chelsea and Carmen sitting there. And this time when I get close, they don't separate, finally.

"Hey lovers" I tease as I sit down.

"Hey Spence" "Sup" They say at the same time. They start talking about art, and I get bored so I take out my phone. Going through my apps, I smile and open one.

**SLC823: **I hate being up this early

**LAbabe4u:** I know what you mean

**LAbabe4u:** Wait, why are you on, shouldn't you be at school?

"So my parents are going away this weekend, and I'm throwing a party. I think that will be perfect for us to officially start the plan." Chelsea says bringing my attention back to her.

"That sounds like a good idea." I smile. "Are you going to invite her or should I?"

"You should, it will add to the plan." Carmen says to me.

"I like the way you think. I'll invite her when I see her."

**SLC823:** I am at school. I'm using my phone.

**LAbabe4u:** Oh I see you finally got the app.

**SLC823:** Yea I got a new phone and I found it

**LAbabe4u:** awesome, now I won't be bored in my classes

**SLC823:** exactly what I was thinking.

"Oh look who just showed up." I hear Carmen say. I look up to see Ashley getting out of Aiden's car looking hot as hell. She is wearing a black mini skirt, and a tight tank top. I can't take my eyes off of her.

"You might want to wipe the drool off your face before she gets any closer." Chelsea laughs and I glare at her, but I wipe my face because I'm sure she wasn't lying. I look back over to her and she sees me and smiles. Then she gives Aiden a hug and I roll my eyes and turn around.

"Hey ladies" she says as she takes a seat next to me, very close not that I'm complaining.

We all respond with some sort of greeting.

She turns all of her attention on me. "So how was the rest of your weekend?"

"Ok. I worked out and did homework, nothing to brag about. What about you?"

"I went out with Aiden Saturday night and did homework on Sunday. So yea, not much to brag about either." That's confusing; usually girls like to brag about their boyfriends. Why doesn't she seem to like Aiden?

"Isn't going out with your boyfriend fun?" Chelsea asks, taking the question right out of my mouth.

She shifts a little. "Well yea it is, but we uh didn't do anything special."

After she says this, it gets silent. Carmen and Chelsea are probably wondering how odd Ashley seems to be when she talks about Aiden.

"Spence, do we still have Lit together after lunch?" Chelsea says breaking me out of my thoughts.

"Yea that's one of the two classes that stayed the same." I sigh and take out my schedule.

"Why did you change your schedule?" Ashley asks.

"I had to so that I could add a class for basketball practice."

"Oh can I see it, we might have some classes together." I hand her the paper. I'm kind of hoping that we don't have any classes together because I know that I won't pay attention and that I will be distracted by her. On the other hand, I want a class with her because I would get to see her more. So I have mixed feelings right now.

"Oh yay, we have two classes together, first and fourth!" She seems really excited about this, I wonder why.

"Really that's awesome. Now you can do my homework for me." I tease.

"Or we can just do it together." She smiles at me, and I blush. I don't know why but I do.

The bell rings before I have a chance to respond. Thank God because I don't think I would have been able to talk.

Ashley stands up and brings me with her. "We are going to get to class, see you later!" She says and drags me towards class. I wave back at Chelsea and Carmen who seems to have amused looks on their faces.

We got to the class and after I told the teacher why I was joining her class so late, she let me sit in the back next to Ashley. I have a feeling that that was a bad move on her part.

And I was right because as soon as she started talking, a note landed on my desk.

_I had fun with you this weekend._

I looked up at Ashley and she was looking at the teacher, acting like she didn't just give me this note.

_Me too, we should have done that a long time ago. _I reply and put the note on her desk.

She smiles and writes something down, then hands it back to me.

_I know, why haven't I met you before last week? _

_I'm not a very social person, well I wasn't. _Is what I write before sending it her way.

She throws the paper on my desk and I smile when I read: _Well either way, I'm glad we met. I think we are going to be great friends._

_I think so too. Hey do you want to go to a party this weekend? _I hope she says yes.

_If you will be there then I would love to. Where at? _I blush when I read this.

_Chelsea's_

_Cool then I'll see you there._

_Good now pay attention before you get both of us in trouble. _I write. I go back to listening because I think that she isn't going to write back. Wrong. I see the paper on my desk again. I look at her and she is taking notes.

I laugh inwardly and look at the note.

_: P_

I giggle at the note and she looks at me. When she does I stick my tongue out at her.

For the rest of the class, we take notes while stealing glances at each other.

I was sad to leave when I went to second period. I couldn't send notes or stare at Ashley.

**LAbabe4u:** Do you think I would get in trouble if I put duct tape on my teacher's mouth so that she would shut the hell up?

**SLC823:** lol just a little

**LAbabe4u:** He won't shut up! I feel like I'm in Charlie Brown's class room. Everything he says is blah blah blah.

**SLC823:** haha I'm sorry. What class is it?

**LAbabe4u:** History

**SLC823:** That makes sense. Be a good girl and pay attention

**LAbabe4u:** I'm far from a good girl ; )

**SLC823:** you never stop do you?

**LAbabe4u:** Nope, I wouldn't be me if I did

**SLC823:** true but who says that's a bad thing?

**LAbabe4u:** Oh you are sooo funny.

**SLC823:** I wasn't trying to be, I was being serious

**LAbabe4u:** My feelings are hurt

I don't get a chance to respond because the bell rings. I pick up my things and head to my next class. When the class gets going, I take out my phone again.

**SLC823:** I'm sorry let me kiss and make it feel better.

**LAbabe4u:** Too late, I don't want your kisses

**SLC823:** Please everyone wants my kisses.

**LAbabe4u:** I think I'm rubbing off on you

**SLC823:** lol I think so too. Normally I would never say that. I guess I shouldn't talk to you so much.

I decide to take some notes, so that I won't fail the class.

**LAbabe4u:** Like you can resist.

I almost laugh out loud when I read that.

**SLC823:** I'm sure I can.

**LAbabe4u:** Ok fine, I won't IM you for the rest of the day.

**SLC823:** have it your way

I paid attention for the rest of class, and smiled when I went to fourth period. You get one guess as to why I was so happy.

"You should change your schedule so that we have all of our classes together." She says as she takes a seat next to me in the back again.

"Aww did you miss me?" I say in the teasing baby voice.

"Not really, but it is just fun to have someone to talk to in my classes." She smirks.

I put my hand up to my heart and give her a hurt look. "Thanks for the boost in self-esteem."

"No problem" She is such a smart ass, but for some reason I like that about her.

The teacher walks in soon after and gets straight to work. We aren't able to pass notes this time because the teacher actually makes us do work in this class. I actually like this class because it's interesting and the teacher isn't boring.

A few times during the class, I look at Ashley. Sometimes I will catch her glancing down at her phone, and sighing. I wonder what that's about.

The bell rings after the fifty minute class and I pack up my things.

"Do you care if I sit with you at lunch?" Ashley asks nervously.

"You can sit wherever you like." I laugh and we walk out of the class. I bump into someone as soon as I walk through the door.

"Oh hey Carlin." I hear from the person I just bumped into. I look up to see Kendra smiling at me, and her green eyes twinkling in the sun. It's sad though, because her eyes have nothing on Ashley's.

"Hey Kendra, what's up?" I smile at her.

"Nothing, happy that it's finally lunch time. How about you?"

"Same here, I hate Mondays." We laugh, but Ashley just stands there with an unreadable look on her face.

"Are you ready for the first official practice today?" She questions.

"Not really, but it has to start sometime right?" I grin and she nods. I look past her and see Chelsea giving me a look. "So you have any plans this weekend?"

Ashley gives me a look that says 'what the fuck?' and Kendra just smiles and says "No, why did you want to hang out?" And she gets a little closer to me.

"Yea my friend is throwing a party and I want you to come." I smile and touch her arm. From the corner of my eye, I see Ashley look at my movement. Oh it's working.

"S-sure I'll be there. What's the address?" She seems to have trouble getting that out. Hmm I like this affect that I have on her.

"How about I pick you up instead?" I tilt my head and smile.

"S-sounds good. Text me when you come. You have my number right?' Kendra says unsurely.

"Actually no, I got a new phone. Can you give it to me again please?" I say sweetly and hand her my phone.

"Of course." And she puts her number in my phone before handing it back to me.

"I'll see you in seventh period." I hug her. "Bye Kendra." I say before walking away and Ashley follows. I get to the table and Carmen and Chelsea smiles at me obviously seeing the whole thing.

"What was that?" Ashley asks kind of harsh.

"What was what?" I ask innocently.

"Flirting with Kendra!" She practically yells.

"Well I told you that I was gay remember? You do know that that means I like girls, right?" I ask playfully.

"No shit Spencer. Why Kendra of all girls?"

"Well I like her. What's wrong with that?"

"I- nothing. I just think you can do better." She sighs and looks away. I follow her line of vision and see that she's looking over at the cheerleader table. Maybe she regrets sitting over here.

I look over at Chelsea and she smiles and gives me a thumbs up. I look back at Ashley and she has a sad look on her face. And now I just feel bad. I don't think I want to continue with this plan anymore.

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews. I never thought I would get so many. I think this is my longest chapter yet. I didn't think I would finish until the weekend, but I had some time. I have no idea when I'll post the next chapter. It depends on how much time I have. I might post again sometime this week, if not it will be next week. So yea let me know what you think. Oh and if anyone knows of any good Breyton stories that are completed, please let me know. I have only read like two, but I want to read more. Just send a message or something. Thanks for reading!**


	12. Chapter 12

**The Queen – Thanks for pointing out my mistake, it is fixed now!**

**And thanks everyone else for the reviews, they are very much appreciated. Here's the next chapter. Let me know what you think!**

For the rest of lunch, I didn't bring up Kendra or the party. I did not like seeing Ashley hurt at all. The bell finally rang, signaling the end of one of the most awkward lunches ever. I grab my bag and stand up.

"I'll see everyone tomorrow. Chelsea are you ready to go to class?" I ask.

"Yea let's go." She kisses Carmen goodbye and we head off to class in silence.

"Spencer wait up!" I hear from behind me. I turn around to see Ashley jogging to catch up. I guess we walked kind of fast. I stop and wait for her to get to me.

I turn to Chelsea. "I don't know how long this will be. You can get to class so that you aren't late. Just save me a seat."

"Ok see you soon." She turns and walks to class.

I turn back to Ashley who's closer. This should be Baywatch and she would be running in slow motion right now. Now that would make my day.

"Spencer!" I snap out of my day dream and look at Ashley as she tries to catch her breath.

"What's up?"

Finally catching her breath she replies "I'm sorry for the way I just acted before."

"Why did you act like that?" I say crossing my arms over my chest.

She sighs, "I just don't think that Kendra is good enough for you. I mean you are smart, sweet, and innocent. And she is just…not."

I blush at her compliments. "You never told me how you two know each other. I mean yea we go to the same school, but I never see you with anyone besides the cheerleaders and Aiden."

"We met through some friends. She hit on me and didn't like it when I turned her down." She shrugs.

"Why couldn't you just tell me this before?" I don't see why that was so hard.

"I just couldn't. Look just be careful with her ok?" She looked at me with real concern in her eyes.

"I will." The warning bell ring and I hate that I have to leave her so soon. "I'll see you later; don't want to be late for class." I smiled and she just stares for a while.

"Right. Later. Bye." She smiles and turns the other way. That was odd. I shake my head and continue to class.

I make it to my class just before the bell rings. I take my seat in the middle next to Chelsea. Not even a minute into the class, my phone vibrates. I look down to see that it's from Chelsea.

_What did she want?_ See she is so nosey.

_She apologized for getting a little crazy at lunch. That's all._

_Oh. Why did she get all jealous?_ I look up to see if the teacher is looking before replying.

_She wasn't jealous. She was just idk, but not jealous._

_Yea you keep telling yourself that. _I don't know why they think Ashley likes me.

_She's just not a big fan of Kendra._

_Why not? From what I heard she's nice, but she sleeps around a little. _What? She doesn't seem like the type.

_Who did you hear that from?_

_People talk. _People are always talking according to Chelsea. She is just nosey.

_Ok Well Ashley just told me to be careful._

_Aww she cares about you. _

_Well yea, we are friends._

_She wants to be more. I don't know why you can't see that. _I roll my eyes. I don't know why she keeps saying that.

_Whatever you say Chels. I'm going to learn now; I suggest you do the same._

_Whatever, you know it's true. _I just exit the text rather than respond because I know she will go on for forever.

Twenty minutes later I feel my phone vibrate again. I roll my eyes, Chelsea never gives up. I look at my phone and am surprised when I see that it's not Chelsea.

**LAbabe4u:** I'm so bored.

**SLC823:** lol, what happened to not talking to me for the rest of the day?

**LAbabe4u:** I couldn't resist and I am so bored.

**SLC823:** I knew you couldn't resist me. I'm like chocolate, irresistible.

**LAbabe4u:** I guess so, because I keep coming back for more.

**SLC823:** Haha I knew I would get you to admit that one of these days.

**LAbabe4u:** I just had to admit it to myself first.

So she really does like me. I just wish we could meet, and see how things go from there. If not, I'll end up chasing after Ashley, and that's not a path I want to go down. And then there is Kendra, who apparently gets around. Ugh life is wonderful isn't it?

Before I could respond, my phone is taken out of my lap. Holy shit, the teacher caught me, and I'll have detention. That's just fucking awesome. I look up to see the teacher still at the front of the classroom going on with her lesson. Ok now I'm confused. I look around to see who took my phone.

My eyes land on Chelsea. That bitch. She is looking at my phone with a confused look on her face. Oh God, this cannot be good.

After a few minutes, she hands me back my phone. There is a message already on my phone when I get it. I open it and it simply says: _We need to talk._

I don't respond because what would I say? Either way we were going to talk. I sigh and continue to listen.

After class, Chelsea just headed out of class with a quick 'later' to me. This is just great. How am I going to explain this to her?

When I sit in my next class, I realized that I haven't responded to LAbabe4u.

**SLC823:** Why wouldn't you admit it to yourself?

**LAbabe4u:** because I refused to believe that I could like someone this much without meeting them.

**SLC823:** Aww that's cute. I'm glad you admit it though.

**LAbabe4u:** It was going to happen eventually.

**SLC823:** True. So now you like two girls. That must be a record for you.

**LAbabe4u:** very funny. And to be honest it's a little scary.

**SLC823:** scary why?

**LAbabe4u:** I don't normally get these types of feelings. But for some reason I can never get you two off of my mind. I just don't know how to deal with them I guess.

**SLC823:** Just go with the flow. Don't try to figure it all out now.

**LAbabe4u:** Great advice, thanks.

We continue with our normal banter for the rest of the period. She was kind of disappointed when I told her that I couldn't talk to her for the last period because of basketball.

After this class, I went to the gym for basketball class and practice. After changing in the locker room, I went to the gym saw the other girls stretching. I picked a random spot and began to stretch.

"I'm going to love coming to practice if this is what I get to see every day." I hear Kendra say from behind me.

"Oh I see you aren't stuttering anymore." I laugh and continue my stretching.

"Shut up! You just caught me off guard." She says and starts to stretch next to me.

"That's shocking. You seem like the flirty type."

"Usually I am. But I wasn't expecting that from you. I mean I didn't even know you liked girls." There's a silence. I don't know what to say. I mean she is gay so she won't hate me for being gay, but she might say something to other people. "Are you into girls? Or were you just being flirty?"

I freeze at her question. Do I tell her the truth or lie my way out of it? Can I trust her? What did Ashley mean by be careful with her?

"It's ok if you don't want to tell me. But I'm guessing that by your silence and worried expression that you are." I stand there unable to move or speak. Am I that readable? "I won't say anything to anyone. I understand what it is like to be in the closet and not want anyone to know." She smiles at me and I smile back. It feels nice to have someone know what I am going through.

"Thanks for keeping my secret. I'm not really ready for anyone to know yet. This is all so new to me." I admit.

"No worries. If you ever need anyone to talk to, or want to chill you have my number. It can be hard." Kendra says as she moves into another stretch. I watch as she bends over to stretch her legs. Wow, is the only thing I can think.

A whistle blows me right out of my staring. "Ok ladies. Today is our first practice. I am excited to start this new season with all of you. Our first game is in two weeks, which means that we have a lot of work to do. I want all of our newbies paired with the veterans."

I was paired with Jessica. She's a cute dark-skinned girl with nice hazel eyes. She's the best player on the team, so I am kind of nervous to be paired with her.

"I want the veterans to work on defense with the new girls. Basically blocking, and standing positions." Coach Roberts yells from across the gym.

Throughout the practice, Jessica definitely did not take it easy on me. She elbowed me in the ribs so many times that I lost count after the fifth. And it was in the same spot so I know there's a bruise there. I of course did not show her my pain because I didn't want her to think I couldn't handle her.

The bell rang for seventh period, but practice was not over, we still had to stay for another hour.

"Ok I want a newbie versus veteran game. This is basically so that the new players can see how it is to play in a real game. This is also for me to see who will be starting and who won't." Everyone looked around, checking out the competition. "Ok let's start." She blew her whistle and we started the game.

Of course, I had to guard Jessica. She is ridiculously strong, so every time she hits me I feel the wind get knocked out of me. She won't let me get in the pain, so I got smart. I started shooting three's. To my surprise, I actually made most of them. Jessica soon caught on to what I was doing so I starting passing it to Kendra. She was the only one that seemed to be open. And let me just say that she is quick. I'm glad that I'm not guarding her.

In the end, we lost but not by much. At the end of practice, my ribs were hurting from where Jessica hit me. I didn't let it show but it was hard for me to walk.

I took a quick shower in the locker room after practice, and then I got dressed as fast as I could.

"You ok there newbie?" Jessica said while laughing. Some of the other girls joined in, they were all the veterans.

"Yea why wouldn't I be?" I snap back.

"You look a little hurt there. I wasn't too rough with you was I?" Jessica says with a smirk.

"No, I'm fine actually. Is that all you got?" I say and by the look on her face I can tell she wasn't expecting that.

She walks closer to me and gets into my face. "Listen newbie, you ne-" She gets interrupted by the locker room opening.

"Is everything ok Spencer?" Kendra asks as she stands next to me. It is definitely nice not to be alone.

"I'm good, let's just go." I grabbed her arm and left the locker room. "That girl is a bitch." I say once we get outside.

"Yea I know. Ana told me about her." Ana was the veteran that Kendra was partnered with. "She likes to try to scare the new girls away, but I'm glad you know how to stand your ground."

"I don't like to be violent, but I'm not going to let her try to push me around." I reply. "Oh and thanks for having my back."

"No problem. I told you, I'm here if you need anything." She says sincerely.

Well now that she says that, something comes to my mind. "Hey can I ask you something?"

"Sure go for it." She smiles at me.

"How do you know Ashley? I mean were you friends or something?"

"We…uh…" She pauses and scratches the back of her head. "Maybe you should ask her that. I mean you two are friends right?"

"Well yea but she won't really tell me anything, that's why I'm asking you." We get the parking lot and stop by a row of cars.

"Ok well we knew each other about a year ago. She was my first friend here and everything was great. Then things with us started to become different." She sighed and her eyes looked a little watery.

"Different how?" I hope I'm not crossing any lines by asking her this.

"She…we star-"

"Hey Spencer!" I turn and look at Ashley heading towards us.

"Hey I'm gonna go. I'll see you tomorrow. Bye Spencer." Kendra says and walks away.

What the fuck happened between them? Why is it so hard for one of them to tell me what happened? I guess I will just have to ask Kendra some other time.

I look towards Ashley and she is wearing short black shorts and a tight white shirt. I would love to watch cheerleading practice if that's all she wears.

"Hey, how was your first practice?" Ashley says smiling at me.

"It could have been worse." I say and start walking to my car, Ashley follows.

"Why are you walking like that?" Ashley asks. How can she tell? I am walking perfectly fine, well sort of.

"One of the players kept elbowing me in the ribs. She doesn't really like new people." I give a little laugh, but she doesn't.

"Do you want me to take you to the hospital? I mean you can have a fractured rib. Or worse it could be broken! I'm going to hurt that little bi-" Aww she is so cute when she rambles.

"Ashley! Whoa calm down." I laugh. "I'm fine, it just hurts a little. And I might have a little bruise tomorrow. But I am fine really." I smile trying to reassure her.

"I'm sorry. I just don't like that she did that to you." She blushes. We get to my car and it's a little quiet. "Do you need help treating it? I mean I get a lot of bruises from cheerleading practice so I know how to help. And I have this cream that takes away pain really fast. I know th-"

"Ok Ash, I'm going to need you to stop rambling." She blushes again. "And I would love it if you helped me, it does hurt pretty badly."

"Awesome. Normally Aiden would take me home, but since I'm your nurse for the day, I'll just go to your house, if that's ok." She says unsurely.

"That's fine. Get in the car." I say as I walk to the driver's seat. She gets in and puts her seat belt on. I look over at her and smile.

Whenever I'm around her, she makes me so incredibly happy. It's like nothing in the world can ruin my mood.

I start the car up and as soon as I go to pull out, my phone vibrates. I pick my phone up and see that it's from Chelsea.

_I'm coming by your house at 5 today. We still need to talk._

Oh shit, I completely forgot about that. What am I going to tell Chelsea? And Ashley will be there when she comes by; will she still want to talk then? This is just great.

Well my mood is definitely ruined.


	13. Chapter 13

I park the car and turn to Ashley.

"Ok so since this is the first time you have been to my house, I'm going to prepare you before you walk in." I pause and she nods for me to continue. "My mom is…well some might say she's a bit intimidating, but don't worry she's probably not here." I pause again, and she has a slightly nervous look in her eyes. "Then there's my dad, he is awesome and sweet, but I doubt you will meet him because he is always at the office." She seems a little less tensed at that. "And then there's Glen…well you already know what to expect with that, let's just hope he has pants on if he is there." She laughs a little. "It's not too late to back out, you know."

"I think I can handle it." She smiles at me and unbuckles her seat belt. I follow her and get out of the car. We walk up to my front door and I unlock it. "Maybe you should go in first and see if your mom is there." She says and I smile at her nervousness.

I grab her hand and pull her inside. "You will be fine; she's not going to kill you or anything."

We walk into the house and we hear yelling coming from the living room.

"STOP CHEATING, AIDEN!"

"I'm not cheating, you just suck."

"Yea well we see who sucks after I make this touchdown!"

I shake my head and walk further into the living with Ashley trailing behind me.

"Hey guys." I say as we walk into the living room. We only get a mumbled hey and hi in return because they are so into the game. I turn to leave when I hear Glen yell again.

"Oh hey Spence, how as your first practice?" Glen asks even though he is still playing his game.

"One of those little bitches decided to use her as a punching bag. I swear when I find out who it was she won't think twice about even looking at Spencer the wrong way." Ashley says with so much anger that the game is suddenly paused and all eyes are on her. "What?"

"And that is why I am not telling you who it was, I don't need you hurting anyone." I tell her even though I think it is cute that she is getting so worked up about it.

"I've never seen you so mad Ashley, it's kind of hot." Glen says with a smirk. Aiden hits him. "What?"

"Don't say that about my girlfriend, let's just play."

"I'm just telling the truth. Ashley is hot, don't you think Spence?" Glen asks me, and suddenly everyone turns to look at me. Why the hell did he have to put me on the spot like that?

"I think we should go put some cream on your bruise before it gets any worse." Ashley says before I could answer. I have no idea what I was going to say anyway. I mean anyone with eyes could see how hot Ashley is, but how would it sound coming from a supposedly straight girl?

"Yea you're right; it is starting to bother me again." The game is started again we turn to leave before I remember something. "Glen is mom and dad home?"

"No, Mom has the overnight shift tonight, and dad is working on some big case and I don't think he will be home tonight either." That's just awesome.

"Ok, Chelsea should be coming in about ten minutes, I'll be in my room just tell her to come up." I received a head nod in response. I turn to Ashley and smile at her "See you had nothing to worry about." She lets out a little laugh. "Alright let's go." I turn to the stairs and lead Ashley to my room. I have to admit that I am kind of nervous of what she will think of it. When we get to my door, I open it hesitantly. "So here we are."

She looked around my room and I was silently yet impatiently waiting for her to say something.

"It's cute, I like it." She says and takes a seat on my bed.

"Thanks." An awkward silence fills the room.

"So let me see that bruise so I can put the cream on it." She says suddenly.

I lift up my shirt revealing my abs and the bruise on my ribs is worse than what I thought. I look at Ashley to see when she is going to start, only to find her staring at my exposed stomach.

"So does the cream come out of your eyes or …" I trail and smirk; she blushes.

"N-no…I was j-just…" She stops. I guess she didn't have a reason as to why she was staring so hard. She reaches over into her bag, and grabs a white tube. "Lay back on the pillow." I follow her orders.

She squeezes some of the cream on to her hand and sets the tube down next to her. She reaches over and gently puts her hand on my bruise. I jump from the feeling that went through my body when her fingers touched me. She looked at me with a questioning look and takes her hands off of me.

"Sorry, it was um…cold?" I force out.

She laughs "Is that a question or is it cold?"

"Shut up! It is cold ok?" I hit her arm.

"If you say so Spencer." She leaned forward again to rub in the cream. "Ok I am going to rub it in now, try not to jump this time, ok?"

I roll my eyes, "Yea yea, just get on with it."

This time when her fingers touch me, I don't jump, well not my entire body. I know I should not be feeling this way because she is just a friend, but I can't help it. She has really soft and warm hands that feel so good on my body; slowly I relax into the bed and close my eyes. A moan escapes my lips I open my eyes and I blush instantly. She smiles at me, but continues.

"So Spencer, I saved you earlier, but that's only because I know that they don't know that you're gay," She pauses. What is she talking about? I can barely think clearly right now, I'm so lost in her touch. "But I want to know."

"Uh ok…what do you want to know?"

"Well…do you think I'm hot?" She asked simply while still rubbing in the cream.

I looked at her with my eyes bugged out of my head. I mean what do I say? If I tell her yes, will she think that I like her and avoid me? If I tell her no, she might get self-conscious around me and I like the way she is now. What the fuck am I supposed to say?

"I uh…" I swallow hard. There's no point in lying, right? "Of course I think you're hot, who wouldn't?" I laugh it off.

"Are you just saying that so I don't feel bad or do you really mean that?"

"I wouldn't lie to you Ashley." I tell her honestly.

She stops rubbing my bruise and looks at me with a smile. "Good." We stare at each other after she says this.

Her eyes are so intense and beautiful. Her eyes seem to express so much as well. Right now she's looking at me like she wants to tell me something, but something is stopping her. A strand of hair makes its way across her face and I sit up and reach over to push it back. I feel her get tense from my movement. As I move the strand behind her ear, we continue our staring match. She moves closer, or maybe I am just imagining it because I am staring so hard.

She has to feel at least a little bit of what I am feeling. I mean the flirting and touching can't be for nothing. So I decide to do something bold. I feel myself move closer to her and she doesn't move back, I'll take that as a good sign. She leans forward, and this time I'm not imagining it.

"Spence we really ne-" Ashley and I jump apart. I look over to see Chelsea in my door way. I let out a breath and pull my shirt down.

"Oh hey Chelsea, nice of you to knock." I say sarcastically.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know you were busy." She says as she walks into my room and takes a seat at my desk.

"I'm going to go downstairs with the guys and let you two talk." Ashley mumbles and leaves.

Chelsea looks at me "What was that all about?"

I blush just thinking about our almost kiss. "Nothing she was just helping me with my bruise."

"What happened?"

"A girl at practice was a little too rough, no biggie."

"Who was it? I'll have her kissing your ass in no time." Chelsea said seriously. No one at school really messed with Chelsea because they knew what she was capable of.

"It's fine. I'm fine. And I don't want you fighting for me, I can do that myself." I tell her.

"Ok fine, I won't do anything just tell me who it was." She and I both know that she will do something once she finds out who it was.

"No, so what was it that you wanted to talk about?"

"Oh yea, I almost forgot what I came over here for." She sits back into the chair getting more comfortable. "So tell me Spence, who's LAbabe4u?"

Shit, I forgot that she saw my phone today. I guess since she already saw it, I have to tell her the truth.

"Ok well I guess I will start from the beginning." I started and she nodded. "So on the first day back to school, I was a curious about girls and I didn't know who to turn to. If I had known about you, then I would have come to you but I didn't. Anyways, when I got home I looked up gay chat rooms, just so I could talk to other girls and see if I was really gay." I paused to look at her and she was giving me her full attention so I continued. "I found one chat room and made a profile. I was in the chat room and I posted that I was gay curious. I received a few responses but none I was interested in until I was about to leave." I took a deep breath. "LAbabe4u IMed me and I liked her instantly. From that day we have been talking every day, and I really like her Chels." I smile just thinking of her.

"Are you sure it's a not some weird creepy old guy that preys on innocent little girls?" Chelsea asked with a raised eyebrow.

"I'm sure I would know if it was. She is too real and I think it would be hard for someone to make up a story like hers."

"What's her story? What is she like?" There she goes with those questions again.

"Well she is 18 and a brunette. She is the head cheerleader at her school. Oh get this, she is dating the star of the basketball team who is also gay. They are really good friends, so they just use each other as covers. She doesn't date girls. Her motto is usually fuck 'em and leave 'em. But despite that she is really funny and sweet. I really like her and she told me today that she felt the same way. I just wish I knew who she was so I could do something about the way I feel." I say so quickly that I don't know if Chelsea even heard anything I said.

Chelsea is staring at me with a shocked expression played on her face. Her mouth opened but nothing came out.

"So does that sound like a creepy old guy that preys on little innocent girls?" I say with a raised eyebrow.

"No not really, what's her name?"

I smile when I think of why I call her Gayle. "I uh I don't know. I call her Gayle and she calls me Oprah." Chelsea just gives me a questioning look. "I know it sounds silly, but it is really cute when you think about it."

"If you say so. Do you even know what she looks like? Do you have a picture?" She questions.

"She is a brunette and a little shorter than me. She has curly hair and brown eyes. And she is about the same size as me."

Chelsea seems lost in thought for a minute. "You know that sounds a lot like Ashley."

I never really thought about that. I guess that description could be used to describe Ashley.

"Ehh I guess." Then I remembered that I wanted to talk to Chelsea about something too. "Oh Chels I need to talk to you about the plan."

"Oh today was perfect! Ashley was really falling for it. The party is going to be awesome!" She said excitedly.

"Actually, I don't want to continue with it." I say looking down.

"What why not, you were making progress."

"I don't think I can do it anymore. I don't want to hurt Ashley." I sigh and lay back on my bed.

I feel Chelsea come sit next to me. "You really care about her don't you?" I only nod. "Ok then we can stop with the plan; I don't want you to get hurt by doing this." She runs her fingers through my hair.

"Thank you Chels, I'm glad you understand." We stay quiet for a while then I shoot up. "Oh shit! I need to go get Ashley. She is probably going crazy with those two." I get up from the bed and leave the room. I rush down the stairs and when I get to the living room, I see Glen sitting on the couch playing the game alone. "Where are Ashley and Aiden?"

"He took her home." He said not taking his eyes off of the television.

"What why?" I practically yell. I thought she was going to sit down here with them, not leave!

"She came out here a little after Chelsea went up, then she went back up after a few minutes. She was up there for a while, and then she ran down here telling Aiden to take her home because she didn't feel well."

I think about why she was up there for so long, did she hear what we were talking about? Oh my gosh, she must have heard about the plan I was talking about with Chelsea! Shit! Shit! Shit! I am screwed!


	14. Chapter 14

I wake this morning still not feeling any better from yesterday. After Ashley left, I tried calling and texting her, but I never received a response. I knew that I should have never gone along with that stupid plan, but of course I did anyway. She must be pissed at me for doing that to her. I sigh and begin to get ready for school.

On my way to school, I think about what will happen when I see Ashley. She will probably see me then run in the opposite direction. Or better yet, she will yell at me then walk away, I won't blame her for whatever she does. I would like it if she would talk to me, but that is just wishful thinking.

When I get to school, I notice a few cars in the parking lot and none of them looks like Aiden's car. I get out of the car and head straight to my normal table. As soon as I sit down, I take out my phone so I could listen to some music, and to see if I had an IM from LAbabe4u, which I don't. She's been offline since the last time I spoke to her which is weird because we usually talk at night. I can already tell that this is not going to be my day. I let out a breath and put my head down in my arms.

I feel a tap on my shoulder and I lift my head up to see Kendra standing in front of me. I take my headphones out and smile at her.

"Hey" I say.

She takes a seat "hey, are you ok?" I guess my bad mood shows.

"I've been better, you?"

"I'm fine. But what's wrong? Is it that Jessica bitch again?" She asks balling her fists up.

"No I haven't even seen her yet. And I will be fine, I think, so no worries." I smile. I decide not to tell her about the whole Ashley situation because she will more than likely get mad at me for using her and I really don't need anyone else not talking to me.

I can tell by the look on her face that she doesn't believe me, but she doesn't question it which I am grateful for.

"Hey Spence, how are you?" I turn around to see Chelsea and Carmen standing behind me holding hands.

"I'm alright Chels. No change from yesterday." I run my hand through my hair and Chelsea gives me a sympathetic look. "HI, Carmen."

"Hey Spencer, Chels told me about the skank that bruised you up yesterday at practice. What's her name? And before you say anything, I just want to have a little talk with her." She gives me a smile, yea definitely not falling for that one.

"Oh you mean Jes-" Kendra starts before I cut her off.

"So this is Kendra, Kendra this is Chelsea and Carmen." I introduce them. Kendra gives me a confused look and the other two look at her with a smirk on their faces. I quickly turn to Kendra again. "Do not tell them anything. They don't know who did that to me for a reason." I tell her.

"Say that I did happen to tell them, what would be the consequences?" She crosses her arms and smirks at me. Someone is being flirty today and it's kind of hot.

"Try it and you'll see." I say mirroring her actions. She raised an eyebrow at me and I did the same.

"Jes…ouch!" I pinched her before she could finish. She looked over at me. "What the hell was that?"

"It's called a pinch." I smirk at her.

"I know that Smartass. Why did you do it?"

"I told you not to say anything."

"And I was supposed to be afraid." She laughed. I know I don't look that intimidating but damn. I pout and she stops laughing. "Aww don't be upset, I'm sure you are really tough when you want to be." And she laughs again which makes me pout more. "That's cute." Kendra says and I blush.

"Anyway back to point, don't tell them." I gave her my most intimidating look and she tried to her hardest not to laugh.

"It was Jessica Parker." She says with a smile. I give her the 'what the fuck' look and she just shrugs. "What I know that you won't talk to me if I do anything and I will probably get kicked off the team, but they won't so someone has to do something about it."

"Thank you Kendra, we owe you one." Chelsea says and drags Carmen away. Just great.

"They aren't going to kill her or anything right?" She asks me seriously.

"I don't know what they are going to do, but I don't think that they will go that far."

The bell rang soon after and I headed to first period, hoping that I would see Ashley. When I got there she was already sitting in her seat surrounded by other people. She didn't look my way once, and it hurt. I sulked to a seat in the back and waited for the teacher to begin teaching.

A few minutes into class, I felt a pair of eyes on me. You know that feeling you get when you know someone is looking at you? Yea well I have one of those right now. I look up and my eyes find Ashley's across the room. She doesn't seem angry or hurt; she's just staring with a blank look. And this confuses me, I mean shouldn't she be angry after she found out about the games I played with her? I would be mad. If she's not mad, then why didn't she return my calls or texts? Why did she leave so suddenly?

I turn away from her and look at the teacher. I need to talk to her. After class she practically ran out of the room which didn't give me a chance to talk to her. The rest of my classes went by in a blur. When fourth period came around, the same thing happened again. She sat across the room and looked at me at random times during the class period. And again after this class she ran out of the room like it was on fire.

I made my way to the lunch table but Chelsea and Carmen were not there as they normally would be. They are probably just running late or something. I shrug and take out my lunch to eat. Seconds later, I feel someone come sit next to me. I know it's not Ashley because I don't have the tingles go through my body as I normally would whenever she gets close to me. I look up and Kendra is sitting there like it's something normal for her.

"Are you stalking me now?" I joke.

"No but I thought I would be nice and give you company since you are sitting alone. But I see that I am not wanted here so I will just leave." She says and stands up again but I grab her arm and pull her down. "That's what I thought."

"Yea whatever, you are just lucky that I don't want to sit alone right now." I stick my tongue out at her and she laughs. She has a cute laugh that I never really noticed before.

"Where are the other two that you usually sit with?" She asks.

"I have no idea; they are usually here by now." I pause and think for a second. "Thanks to you they are probably doing who knows what to Jessica right now!"

She looks guilty for a second and then she smiles. "Well whatever happens to her, she deserves it."

"Hey girls" I hear Chelsea say as she and Carmen sit at the table.

"Where were you?" I question.

"Oh we had to finish an assignment for art that was due today." Carmen says, but for some reason I don't believe her.

"So any luck with Ashley?" Chelsea says and I shake my head. "She will come around, I mean what you did wasn't that bad."

"What happened with Ashley?" Kendra piped up and suddenly it was quiet. I couldn't hear anything, not the laughing, yelling, or talking, nothing. How do I explain this to her without her getting hurt in the process?

"Ok what happened between me and Ashley involves you. And before I start, I am really not this mean normally but I was trying to figure something out and you were the perfect person to do it with." I stopped and she looked at me signaling for me to continue. I took a deep breath and started again. "So I have this crush on Ashley, right?" She nodded. "And she's with Aiden, but she flirts with me whenever she is around me. So after I told Chelsea and Carmen this…" I paused and looked over at the previously mentioned couple. They both gave me encouraging smiles, so I continued. "They came up with a plan to make Ashley jealous."

Kendra was quiet for a minute. "Ohh so that's why you were so flirty with me yesterday?"

"Yes" I admitted shyly. She looked away and I felt bad that I have hurt yet another person. "I am really sorry that I did that. I should have never agreed to go along with it in the first place." She nodded. "For what it's worth, I think you are a great person and any girl would be lucky to have you." I smiled at her.

She turned back to me. "You really think so?"

"Yes of course."

"Thanks Spencer. And I get why you did what you did, but for future notice, please do not involve me in any of your plans."

"Deal" I said with a smile.

"Oh and one more thing, be careful with Ashley."

"Why what's wrong with her?" Chelsea asks.

"Nothing, just don't get to close." Kendra says with a sad look on her face. Chelsea gives me a look and I nod telling her that I'll be careful when it comes to Ashley.

"So for the party this Friday I…" Chelsea began but I zoned out.

Something, rather someone, caught my attention across the quad. She was sitting with the rest of the cheerleaders at their normal table. I miss her. That's bad because I haven't known her for that long. She is sitting there looking slightly out of it. I really wish she would talk to me. I want to apologize for being an asshole and hope that we can be friends again. She looks up and that's when I realize that I have been staring at her for a while. I blush and look down when she catches me.

After lunch, I go through my next classes in a blur. I don't really pay attention, my mind is on Ashley.

When I get to practice, I immediately change and stretch. Kendra soon comes in laughing hysterically and I look at her like she's on crack.

"What's so funny?" I ask while still stretching.

She is trying to control her laughter but she can't. "Have you seen Jessica yet?" She asks in between laughs.

"No, why? What's wrong with her?" She just laughs even harder.

Then I hear laughter coming from the side of the gym near the locker room. I turn around to see Jessica walking towards me. When she gets closer I try my hardest not to laugh. On her forehead written in sharpie was 'I 3 SC' and on her cheeks were "I'm Sorry." This is so embarrassing yet so funny. She was also sporting a swollen eye and a nice cut on her lip. I told them not to be so violent. I shake my head and she stops in front of me.

"I'm sorry for how I acted yesterday Spencer and it will never happen again." She says in a monotone voice.

"It's ok." I say trying my hardest not to laugh in her face.

"Alright ladies, we are running laps today so I hope you are ready." Coach Roberts yells when she enters the gym.

By the time practice was over, I was refreshed. I love being able to run and clear my head. After showering, Kendra and I walked out to the parking lot and she was being strangely quiet.

"Hey are you ok?" I ask her.

"Yea I'm good." I nod my head and suddenly she stops. "Can I ask you something Spencer?"

"Yea sure, anything."

"I… can I…would you" She pauses and I smile at her nervousness. She takes a deep breath. "Would you maybe want to go out with me sometime?"

Then I freeze. I have never had a girl ask me out before. What if I fuck it up? I also freeze because from the corner of my eye I see Ashley walking with Aiden holding hands.

"I would love to." I respond.

"Awesome, is tomorrow night good?" She asks. "I mean I would say Friday night but that's the night of the party. And I can't wait until Saturday, so I hope you like Wednesday dates." She smiles at me.

"I love them." I smile back. She comes forward and hugs me. Is it bad that I wish that she was Ashley? I mean I like her, but not as much as I like Ashley. But at least I actually have a chance with Kendra.

We pull back and I look over and see Ashley staring at us. She quickly looks back to Aiden and begins to nod.

"So I will see you tomorrow, later Spencer." Kendra says and walks away. I look over at Ashley again and she and Aiden are gone. I sigh and head to my car.

On my way home I called Chelsea and told her about my date the next day. She squealed and told me how happy she was for me. And I also told her about seeing Ashley, and she told me to let her come to me. If she wants to talk to me then she will when she's ready. I agreed and we said our goodbyes.

For the rest of the day, I stay in my room and write. I write about my feelings toward Ashley. I write about not being able to be who I want around my family. I just let my feelings free. I checked to see if LAbabe4u was online a few times, but she wasn't. After doing my homework, I called it an early night and went to sleep.

The next day I just head to school feeling neutral. I'm tired of feeling upset about what happened with Ashley. She won't give me a chance to explain so why should I try?

Seeing Kendra, Chelsea, and Carmen did cheer me up. I am happy that I still have them. Chelsea and Carmen smiled brightly whenever Kendra was around. And I tried not to think about Ashley ignoring me. She did the same thing in all of our classes, sat far away from me and rushed out when the bell rang.

Practice was fun; we ran drills and ran the track. Jessica stayed far away from me and didn't look my way once.

Kendra and I were headed to the parking lot again and I saw Ashley with some of her cheer friends this time. She looked our way, but then quickly turned away.

"So I will pick you up at 7, okay?" Kendra asks unsurely.

"Okay, I'll text you my address." I smile at her.

When I got home, I started on some homework. I was happy that my parents were working late because that meant that I didn't have to tell them that I was going out on a date tonight.

At around 6, I text Kendra my address and I start getting ready. I put on some jeans and black V-neck shirt. I leave my hair down and put some make-up on.

When Kendra came we left and headed towards a restaurant. The restaurant was nice and not too fancy. After dinner we went to the movie theater. While waiting in line, she reached over and grabbed my hand. I smiled shyly at her.

"Ohh lezzie has a girlfriend" I hear from behind us. I let go of her hand and turn around. A few girls from the cheerleading squad were laughing, all except Ashley.

"Does your brother know that you raging dyke Carlin?" I hear Madison say. The other girls laugh, and Ashley stays quiet.

"Did you remember to get tested this week Madison? Herpes is going around and I know one of the guys you've fucked probably has it. I mean can you even remember how many guys you've been with today?" Madison stays quiet. "That's what I thought. Keep your skanky ass away from us, we don't want to catch whatever STD you have this month." Kendra says. Afterwards she grabs my hand and we walk into ticket booth.

In the movie theater, she puts her arm around me and pulls me close. I smile and watch the movie.

After the movie she drives me home. When we pull up to my driveway, she turns off the car and turns to me.

"Besides those sluts at the movie theater, I had a really good time with you tonight." She blushes at her admittance. I smile and put my hand over hers.

"I had a really great time. Thanks for sticking up for me."

"No problem. I told you that I am here for you, and I meant that." She smiles at me. I rub my thumb over her hand. Then she leaned forward, and I followed her. Soon we were so close; I could feel her breath on me. I realized that this is the first time that I will ever kiss a girl and I get nervous. I swallowed my fears and leaned the rest of the way in.

Her lips were warm and soft. The kiss was nice, but I felt nothing. I mean I feel tingles just from being around Ashley, I wonder what it would be like to kiss her.

I pulled back and smiled at her. "Thanks for tonight. I'll see you tomorrow in school."

"Ok I'll see you then." She said with a grin.

I got out of the car and went to my front door. I turned around and waved goodbye, she waved back and drove off.

I went upstairs, took a shower, and went straight to bed. So many thoughts running around in my head like: why can't I feel the same way for Kendra as I feel for Ashley? Why won't Ashley let me explain? Is she that mad that she couldn't tell her tell her airheaded friends to stop or something? Is she going to the party on Friday? If so, will she even look my way?

Ugh, too many questions. The one thing I know for sure, being gay is hard.

**A/N: I'm sorry it took a while for the update, but I finally put one up. I hope you are not disappointed with it. And before everyone gets angry, there will be Spashley soon. The party will be in the next chapter. I have no idea what will happen, any guesses?**


	15. Chapter 15

**I already have 200 reviews! Thank you to everyone that has reviewed, it means a lot. Ok on with the chapter.**

"Mom I'm staying at Chelsea's tonight, ok?" I say before I leave for school.

"Wait, I thought we could hang out today. You know we can have a mother daughter day." She suggests.

"I already made plans with Chelsea tonight." I reply.

"Ok I'll see you tomorrow." She says almost sadly. I begin to feel bad about not staying but I already made these plans and she's still not one of my favorite people these days.

"Ok see you later." I almost run out the door to my car. I throw my clothes bag in the backseat and my book bag in the passenger seat.

When I get to school, I am a little later than normal, but I'm still able to find a good parking space.

I walk up to my table and Kendra is waiting there like she was yesterday.

"Hey Spence, how are you today?" She asks when I take my seat next to her.

"Good, I'm excited for the party tonight. You?"

"Same here, I could use a break from the basketball training."

"I know. We have our first game next week. Are you ready?" I ask her.

"Yea I'm nervous. Do you think that we will be able to start?"

"I hope so. The old girls might not like that the new girls get to start but oh well."

The bell rings and I stand up to go to class.

"I'll see you at lunch, right?" Kendra asks as she stands.

"If you sit at my table then yes, I will see you." I reply. She comes forward and hugs me. Every time we go our separate ways, we hug.

"Later" I say when we pull back.

When I get to class, Ashley is already there in the same seat she's been in all week. I sit in my normal seat and completely ignore her staring. She does that in both classes. She just stares but never says anything. Yesterday I tried to talk to her but Aiden came up and I walked in the other direction.

I haven't tried calling or texting her because I knew that I would get nowhere. And I figured that if she was going to talk to me then she would have already. I mean it's been a week.

I went through the rest of the day trying not to think about Ashley, but I couldn't help it. When fourth period came around, we went through our normal routine. She sat on the opposite side of the classroom and stared at me while the teacher talked. I kept my attention on the teacher. And of course, once the bell rang, she ran out before I could say anything.

I walked out after, and went to the quad for lunch.

"Hey Spence, are you ready for tonight?" I hear Chelsea say when I sit down.

"Hell yes. I could use a drink." Everyone laughed. "Do you know if Ashley is still going?"

"I asked Aiden today and he said that she was still coming with him." She replied.

That's good and bad news. I mean I really want to not think about this whole Ashley thing. The good thing is that I might get a chance to talk to her about what's bothering her.

"Oh" was all I could say.

"You ok?" Kendra asks from beside me.

"Yea I'm fine; I just don't want any drama or anything."

"Well I will stay with you to make sure nothing gets out of hand." She is so sweet. I feel bad that I don't like her as much as I like Ashley. If I did everything would be a lot easier.

"That sounds great, thanks" I smile at her.

After lunch, I went to Lit with Chelsea. I felt my phone vibrate and I smiled because I was hoping it would be from Ashley.

_Will you be ok with Ashley there tonight?_

My smile fell when I saw that it was from Chelsea.

_I will be fine. She probably won't talk to me anyway._

_Ok I'm just making sure. I could always un-invite her. _

I laughed out loud and shook my head at Chelsea.

_That's not necessary. I will be fine. Thanks though._

I continued to pay attention until it was time to go. During my next class we had a sub, so I spent the period writing random thoughts.

After that class, I had basketball practice. I was happy because I really love playing and it takes my mind off of being so stressed.

I changed and went on to the court to start stretching as always. Kendra came in after and followed me.

"Ok today we will be running laps doing drills for the first half of practice. Then I will put you on random teams so that I can pick who will start during our first game next week. I will let everyone know on Monday." Coach Roberts pauses then she picked up her whistle and blew it. "Ok let's start!"

Practice really killed me today. I have never played so many games back to back, but of course I was able to handle it.

"After seeing you ladies play today, I think that we will have a great season this year. Have a great weekend and stay out of trouble." She yells and leaves.

I go to the locker room and grab my things. I decide to shower at Chelsea's since I will be getting ready for the party there.

"I'll see you tonight Kendra. You have the address right?"

"Yes Chelsea gave it to me yesterday. I'll be there around 9." She replies. I hug her and leave the locker room.

I didn't see Ashley on my way to my car like I usually would, but I guess I'll see her tonight.

I get to Chelsea's house and park my car. When I get to the door, I knock but no answer. I turn the door knob and it's unlocked so I twist it open.

I walk in the house but I don't see anyone around. "Chelsea?" I yell.

Nothing. No response at all. "Carmen?" I try again and still nothing.

I drop my bag in the living room and I walk upstairs to make my way to Chelsea's room. When I get inside the door is open but there is still no one there. Then I hear the shower running in her bathroom. If someone is in the shower, then where is the other one?

"Oh yes! Right there!" I hear someone moan.

"Holy shit!" I whisper and rush out of the room. I quickly make my way downstairs to the living room.

I turn the TV and make sure to turn the volume up extra loud.

"F is for friends who do stuff together!"

Yay SpongeBob is on. I know that everyone would probably laugh if they found out that I still watched SpongeBob, but I don't care. I love this show. It always cheers me up and how can you not like it?

About twenty minutes or so later, I hear footsteps coming from upstairs. After turning down the TV, I turn to look at Chelsea and Carmen holding hands. They both stop and look at me. One gives me a smirk because she knows that I heard them, the other looks embarrassed.

"How long have you been here?' Chelsea asks hesitantly as she and Carmen take a seat on the couch next to me.

"Long enough. You might want to lock the door the next time you want to have sex in the shower." I say with a smirk.

Chelsea buries her head in Carmen's shoulder in embarrassment. Carmen still had her smirk held in place.

"You're watching SpongeBob, seriously?" Carmen raises her eyebrow at me.

"Yup, is that a problem?" I ask seriously. Carmen just looks at me then at Chelsea who shakes her head. I guess she is warning her not to argue because I will win.

"Nope not at all" She says quickly and turns to the cartoon.

After about an hour or so of watching TV, my stomach starts growling.

"I'm hungry. What's for dinner?" I ask Chelsea.

"Don't look at me. I'm not cooking." Chelsea says.

"Let's order pizza then." Carmen says.

When the pizza comes I eat like I haven't eaten in weeks.

"Is Paula not feeding you or something?" Chelsea asks with a laugh.

"I'm just really hungry. I also get really hungry after practice." I say after chewing the pizza that was in my mouth.

"Right. So what time are we going to start setting up?" Carmen says.

"I was thinking that people will start arriving at around 8:30ish so we can get everything ready at 6:30 and have time to get ready ourselves after. What do you think?" Chelsea asks.

"Sounds good, we have about a half hour before we need to start then." Carmen says. I am too into eating to contribute to the conversation.

"That's just enough time for another episode of SpongeBob." I say happily and turn the volume up again.

As soon as 6:30 came around, we started setting up for the party. We had to move the couches so that there was enough dance space. We set up a beer pong table, put some chips out, brought out the extra liquor, and set up the area for the DJ. After that I went upstairs to take my much needed shower.

By the time I finish getting dressed, it was already 8 o'clock. I was wearing a simple halter top green dress and some cute flats to go with it. My make-up was simple and I curled my hair and let it down.

I went down stairs and notice that there are a few people here along with the DJ who has already started playing some music. I'm nervous because I will more than likely run into Ashley at this party and I have no idea what's going to happen. And I really hope that Kendra gets here soon so that I am not wondering around by myself.

"Hey Spencer, take a shot with me." I hear Carmen yell. Walking to the kitchen, I see her with three bottles of liquor. She pours a shot of each in three different shot glasses.

"I thought you said a shot, not three." I tell her.

"By the end of the night, you will have taken so many shots you won't remember anyways, so why not start now?" She asks. I shrug and began taking the shots. Feeling the alcohol run through my body makes me forget about my nerves for a while.

"Let's dance!" She says once she finishes her shots. She grabs my hands and pulls me into the living room with the rest of the people.

"Um where's Chelsea?" I mean she should be dancing with her girlfriend, right?

"She's making sure no one touches anything, and I wanna dance." She says and stops in the middle of the dance floor. We are dancing face to face and a nice amount of space between us because any other way would just be too awkward for me.

Carmen is a really good dancer. Some people that are already here are eyeing and it kind of makes me feel uncomfortable. What's the big deal about two girls dancing? Soon, I stop worrying about the people around us, and I get into the dance. A few songs later, we are interrupted.

"Are you trying to steal my girl, Spence?" Chelsea says and steps in between Carmen and I. They get closer and I leave to let them dance together. I could use another drink right now.

Making my way to the kitchen, I see Kendra walk through the door. She looks good. Short skirts are definitely her thing. Before she can even say anything, I drag her to the kitchen and start making drinks.

"You look hot Spencer." She says as she leans against the counter.

I smile at her. "You should wear skirts more often." I say with a wink. I finish making the drinks and hand one to her.

Then I start pouring a shot.

"Want one?" I ask Kendra.

"No I'm good with the drink I have. Thanks though." I nod at her and down my shot.

I grab my drink in one hand and Kendra's hand in the other. The alcohol is really starting to affect me. I stumble a little while we walk to the living room. When we get there, I see Ashley, looking hot as fuck of course. She is standing by the wall next to Aiden. There are a lot of people here and it's pretty dark so she most likely has not seen me yet.

I pull Kendra in the middle of the dance area, and before she can react, I just start moving on her. She grabs my waist with her free hand and moves me closer to her. I smile and grind back to her. I look up and glance around the room. I feel someone's eyes on me, but I don't know who. I look back into the corner that I last saw Ashley but she wasn't there.

I then look towards the kitchen and I saw her looking at me. She now has a drink in her hand. Aiden is whispering in her ear and I immediately get jealous. I hate that seeing her with him makes me jealous, but I can't help how I feel.

I ignore her and all thoughts about her and turn my attention back to Kendra and the dance. A few songs later, I run out of my drink.

"I'm going to get a drink, I'll be back." I say to her.

"I'll come with you, I'm tired anyway." We leave the living room and go back to the kitchen.

"Tired already? You can't handle me I see." I say and pour another shot. After the shot, I make another drink. I don't know why I'm drinking so much but I just really want to tonight.

"Oh trust me, I can handle you." She says with a smirk.

"So you're ready to dance again then?" I ask and drag her back out to the dance floor without waiting for an answer.

This time I dance face to face, front to front. I don't know about you, but alcohol turns me on. The more I drink, the more turned on I get.

With that said, I start grinding more into Kendra. She puts her arm around me and pushes me closer to her. With each song, it feels like we get closer and closer.

"Hey you want to go upstairs?" Kendra says. Without thinking, I nod my head. She grabs my hand and I let her lead the way.

I am so drunk right now, so I am tripping up the stairs. A few seconds later we are in a room, I'm not sure which, and my back is on the bed. Her lips are on mine in an instant. I do what comes naturally, and I kiss back. Soon she is on top of me, running her hands up and down my body.

She runs her hands on my thighs and I feel my wetness growing. Just as she goes to where I really want her to be, the door opens.

Kendra turns to the person that walks in and turns the light on. "Get another room, we are using it."

"Spencer?" What the fuck is Ashley doing in here?

I lean up so that I can see her. "What do you want?" I snap. I don't mean to be rude, but when you ignore me for a week and then interrupt when I'm about to get some much needed release, what do you expect?

"Can I talk to you…in private?" She asks and looks at Kendra when she says the last part.

I sigh and rub my hands over my face. "Kendra can you give us a minute please?"

"Ok we can finish later." She kisses my cheek and leave, giving Ashley a dirty look on her way out. Ashley closes the door the second Kendra leaves.

"What did you want to talk about?" I say coldly.

She sits next to me on the bed. "I-I I'm sorry."

I laugh bitterly. "What exactly are you sorry for? Are you sorry for just running out of my house without saying goodbye? Are you sorry for ignoring me for a week? Or are you sorry for just standing there while your bitchy friend insults me? Which one exactly are you sorry for?" I say angrily.

"All of them. I promise that if you give me a minute to explain, you will understand why I did all of those things. At least I hope you will." She says sadly.

"I'm not sure if I want to hear what you have to say Ashley." I say and get up to leave. She grabs my arm and turns me around quickly. "I sai-" I get cut off by her lips on mine.

I am so shocked that I don't do anything at first. Then I thought, Ashley is fucking kissing me why am I not kissing her back? I start moving my lips along with hers and she moans. I swear my legs almost gave out on me when I heard her moan. Now this is really turning me on.

I'm feeling everything I wanted to feel when I kissed Kendra. The warmth, sparks, tingles, butterflies, everything was right here in Ashley's kiss.

Then I remember that she's with Aiden and I am still mad at her. As much as I hate to do it, I push her back.

I instantly miss her lips on mine, but we need to talk.

"W-why did you do that?" I manage to get out. "You're with Aiden and you ignored me for a week. Why?" I look at her, pleading with her to answer me because I am really confused.

"Spencer I need to tell you something and I am not sure how you will react." She says taking a step back.

"What could be so important that it makes you want to kiss me? What makes you want to cheat on your boyfriend? What makes you look the other way when your friends attack me? What could be so damn important that you ignore me for a fucking week?" I yell at her.

"You want to know what made me do all of that?" She yells back.

"Yes please enlighten me because right now, I have no fucking idea!"

"I'm Gayle! The girl you have been talking to online, is me! There I said it! Are you happy now?" She screams and I open my mouth to yell again but close it again when her words register in my head. What did she just say?

**A/N: They finally know about each other! How will Spencer react? Any guesses? I hope you enjoyed this chapter. And thank you for not getting mad for the lack of Spashley in the last chapter, am I forgiven now? I hope so. As always tell me what you think!**


	16. Chapter 16

**Thanks for the reviews, all of you are amazing!**

I don't even know what to think right now. Her words just repeating over and over in my head, "I'm Gayle!" I just, I don't know what to say. I keep opening my mouth to say something and then shut it because what do I say right now? I can't even look at her right now.

I glance at her to see her sitting on the bed facing the wall. She just seems to be blankly staring at the wall. I open my mouth to say something but then I close again. I'm sure I look like Nemo right now.

The door knob turns and someone walks in.

"Spencer, I've been looking for you everywhere. Kendra ca-" And she stops when she notices Ashley sitting in the corner staring at the wall. She can probably feel the tension in the room. "Is everything ok?"

Is everything ok? I have no idea. I mean I know I should be happy because I finally met Gayle and we have a chance to be together. On the other hand, I am upset that I was lied to. I mean how long has she known for? Why is she just telling me now? And like this? Is this some sort of joke that she has been playing with her friends? There are so many questions that I would love the answer to, but I don't know if I even want to talk to her right now.

"I'm going to get some air." I state and leave the room without looking back.

Walking down the stairs, I see Kendra sitting in the corner surrounded by people, but she looks bored. She looks up and sees me walking down the stairs, and makes her way over to me. I sigh because I don't know if I want to be alone or not right now. I am just really confused.

"Hey are you ok?" She asks once she reaches me.

"Yes. I'm just going outside to get some air." I say and I turn around to head to the backyard. When I get there, there is no one outside.

I step outside into the nice warm night and take a deep breath. I am out there for a long time just staring at the dark sky that is lit up by the numerous bright stars. I never realized how peaceful and serene it can be at night.

"Hey" I hear. I turn to see Kendra walking towards me.

"Hi" I reply.

"I know you wanted to be alone but I wanted to see if you were ok."

"I honestly don't know how I am right now." I tell her.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

I do want to talk about it, eventually. But I don't know if I will be able to talk to Kendra about this. I mean she likes me and I like her as well, but not as much as I like Ashley and if I tell her this, I don't want her to get hurt.

"No, I just need try to sort everything out. I'm a little confused right now."

"Ok I'm here if you need me." She says and walks closer to me. I hug her when she opens her arms, but for some reason it feels so wrong. She turns to leave but before she walks through the doors she turns back and says "And please be careful with Ashley. She's not what she seems to be."

"What do you mean?" I ask because obviously something has happened between them.

She sighs and walks back over to me.

"I moved here last year from San Diego. I started King and I didn't know anyone so I was sort of a loner. Anyway, I went to a gay club one night and I was surprised to see Ashley there. I saw her around school because she was a cheerleader. I went over to her and started dancing with her. We danced for a while then she took me to a booth in the back. As soon as we got there we started making out."

She paused and I felt myself get jealous from her words.

"Anyway we continued like that with some touching and what not before Aiden came and told her that they were leaving. She was pretty drunk, so I didn't think she would remember me if she saw me in school. But surprisingly she did. I saw her at lunch and when she saw me, she was surprised. She came up to me after school and told me to follow her home. Of course I did, I mean look at her." She stops again. And I take in everything she's saying. I have no idea where she is going with this story.

"So when I get to her house we get to her room and she's on me as soon as the door closes. I carry her over to the bed and-"

"Ok I don't need the details. I still don't see why I need to be careful of Ashley." I interrupt.

"Right, sorry. So this happened almost every day for about a month or so. We were fuck buddies and I was happy with that. But we were also becoming friends. After the sex we would just talk and be ourselves. We didn't talk in school because she had her friends who I didn't like."

She sniffs and I look at her to see tears on her face. I hold her hand to give her support to continue.

"One day I got to school and everyone was staring at me and whispering. I had no idea what was going on. Then I run into Ashley and the rest of the cheerleaders. Ashley is looking everywhere but me. Then Madison starts saying how I need to leave Ashley alone and stop attacking her. She then told me that the entire school knew I was gay and that I was pathetic enough to think that Ashley would want me even if she was gay. The entire time she was saying this, Ashley was quiet." She started sniffing and wiping the tears away with her hand. "After that we haven't talked and every time I run into the cheerleaders well you saw what happened at the movies."

When she finished, I couldn't believe what she was saying. I couldn't believe Ashley would do something like that. And I believe everything that she is saying because I witnessed it first-hand.

"I'm so sorry. I had no idea that she would do such a thing." I said hugging her.

I don't know what I would do if something like that has happened to me. Then I start to think that maybe it is happening to me. What if this whole pretending to be a lesbian thing was all part of the cheerleaders scheme to out me to the school? Were they laughing the entire time we talked? Were they planning on using our conversations as some sort of proof?

Suddenly I feel dizzy and nauseous. I ran to the bushes and everything that was in my stomach was now in the grass. I wipe my mouth and turn back to Kendra.

"I'm going to go wash up and head to bed. I will talk to you Monday at school, ok?" I say to her.

"Yea, I'll see you then." She turned and went in the house.

I took one last look outside, before I followed her inside. The music was still playing and people were still dancing and having a good time. I went straight upstairs to my room. I was silently praying that Ashley wasn't there. I went in the room and saw two people making out on the bed. I was relieved that it wasn't Ashley, but annoyed that they were here in the first place.

"Out!" I yelled and they rushed up and ran out of the room. I closed the door and locked it. After undressing, I made my way to the bathroom for a shower. I am happy that the bathroom is inside of the room. I take a quick shower and dress in some shorts and a loose shirt soon after.

When I slip into bed, I try not to think about anything that happened tonight but it's hard not to. I have no idea what to think of Ashley. She is the girl that I have been dreaming of meeting. I have never liked someone as much as I like her. When I talk to her I am always smiling, and I forget the world around us. But then when I found out what she did to Kendra, I feel like the person that I have been talking to for so long doesn't exist.

I drift off to sleep and thankful that I can finally get some rest.

The sun rays coming through the window woke me up from my peaceful sleep. I get out of bed and go to the bathroom. When I finish in there I check my phone and I see that I have four texts. One is from Glen asking why he didn't see me all night, one from Chelsea wondering where I am, one from Kendra telling me that she hopes that I get better, and one from Ashley telling me that she is sorry for everything and that she just wants to talk to me so that she can explain.

I decide to text Kendra and tell her that I am fine. I text Glen and tell him that I needed to talk to him soon. I don't even know what to say to Ashley so I just ignore it. I'm not even sure if I want to talk to her at all. And instead of replying to Chelsea I head down to her room.

I knock before entering because as hot as both Chelsea and Carmen are, I would prefer if I didn't walk in on them having sex.

Door opens and Chelsea comes out pulling a shirt over her head. See I knew it.

"Hey Spence" She says in a cheery tone.

"Morning Chels." We start walking downstairs and it's a mess.

"What happened to you last night? After you left the room, I didn't see you for the rest of the night. Then after I kicked everyone out, I went to your room and you were knocked out." She laughs and starts picking things up.

I follow her and sigh. "Well there's a lot I need to tell you. I just don't even know where to begin."

"Well we have a lot to clean so we have a lot of time. And I would prefer if you started from the beginning."

I go to start telling the story, but Carmen comes running down the stairs.

"Wait, I need to hear everything." She goes to the kitchen and comes back later with a big garbage bag. "Ok now you can continue." She says and starts picking up trash from the floor.

I shake my head and laugh.

"Ok so do you remember my friend from online?" I ask them and Chelsea nods but Carmen gives me a confused look. "When school first started, I went on this chat website and started talking to this girl. We were talking every day until last week she suddenly stopped talking to me, around the same time that Ashley stopped talking to me as well."

"No!" Chelsea yells in disbelief, and I nod yes.

"LAbabe4u and Ashley is the same person." I tell them.

"What are the odds of that? Out of all the lesbians in LA, it had to be Ashley." Carmen says laughing a little.

"I told you that her description could fit Ashley." Chelsea says.

"Yea I know. And a lot of other things that she said should have told me that it was Ashley, but somehow I just didn't put two and two together." I shrug.

"Ok so what happened last night, why was there so much tension in the room when I came in?" Chelsea asks.

"Well right before that was when I found out and before that she kissed me."

"How was it?" Carmen asks and I laugh and Chelsea hits her. "What I know you want to know too!"

"It was amazing. It was so different than all the guys and Kendra. I didn't want to stop, but I had to." I sigh. "She ignored me for a week and as far as I knew she was a straight girl with a boyfriend."

"Oh my god! Aiden is gay!" Chelsea yells. And I realize that I haven't thought about that. Ashley said that she and her boyfriend were both gay and covering for each other.

"Yea he is. I wonder if Glen knows." I wonder out loud.

"Who knows? Anyway get back to the story." Chelsea says. She is so nosey.

"Ok well after I stopped her I yelled and she told me that she was LAbabe4u." I gave them the short version. I don't really want to relive what happened last night, well besides the kiss.

"What did you say after that?" Carmen asks.

"Nothing, I mean what could I say? 'Oh yay finally we meet, let's go drive off into the sunset!' Uh yea, no, not happening." I mock and roll my eyes.

"No Smartass, but you could have said something." Chelsea says.

"I know but I was still pissed. Why did it take her a week to tell me? Did she only tell me because I was yelling at her? Was she ever planning on telling me?" I say trying to control my anger.

"Maybe she didn't know how to tell you. I mean can you imagine how that conversation would go. 'Oh hey Spencer, you know that girl you've been talking to online? Yea well I'm her, surprise!'" I laugh when Carmen uses a ridiculous voice to mock Ashley. "I think that she was trying to find a way to tell you." Chelsea nodded her head in agreement.

"Ok that would be a good reason if she didn't ignore me for a week. What good excuse does she have for that?" I almost yell.

"I don't know, you have to ask her." Carmen says.

"I think I know, now that I think about it." Suddenly everything is making sense.

"Would you like to share?" Chelsea would be the one to ask that.

"Well when I went outside, Kendra followed me to make sure that I was ok." I paused to get the broom and when I came back Chelsea and Carmen were just standing there looking at me. "Anyway we were talking and I asked her why she told me to be careful with Ashley. She told me what happened when she first moved to the school. Basically she met Ashley at a gay club, they became fuck buddies, Madison found out, Ashley lied to Madison and told her that Kendra kept trying to get with her. Then one day when Kendra went to school everyone was giving her dirty looks and suddenly everyone knew she was gay."

"What a bitch!" Carmen says

"So that's how that rumor got started. I had a feeling it wasn't true." Chelsea says like it's nothing. "But how does this tie in with Ashley ignoring you?"

"Ashley told me that she liked me, well LAbabe4u did. I think that Ashley was scared once she found out that it was me. Like she knew me and there was chance for us to be together. I don't think she wants to come out to the school." I reply sadly.

"That might be it. Coming out is not easy." Carmen says.

"I know but she could have at least talked to me about it." I say getting frustrated. "Whatever, I don't even know if I want to talk to her anymore."

**A/N: Ok so don't hate me! I hoped you enjoyed the chapter even though things are not looking so great for Spashley right now. As always tell me your thoughts.**


	17. Chapter 17

**Yay finally a chapter! I'm sorry that it took so long, but college is a bit demanding. Any who, on with the story…**

"Everyone in this room, including you, knows that's not true." Chelsea says. "You know that you are dying to talk to her, even if you just say hi." Carmen nods agreeing with Chelsea.

"What makes you think that?" I question.

"Well we just spent like the last half hour talking about this dilemma you are having with her. And whenever you're around Ashley, you get all smiley and happy." Chelsea explains.

"And you told us how amazing it was when she kissed you." Carmen would add that.

I can't help it, they are right, and I honestly do want to talk to her, I just don't know what I would say. I like her a lot, and I know she has feelings for me as well, but there's just so much drama already and we aren't even together yet.

"Ok fine. I do want to talk to her, but I just think it would be easier if I didn't."

"That may be true, but that won't fix anything." Chelsea says and I couldn't agree more.

"I know, I just wish it would all go away." I say honestly.

After we finished cleaning, I went upstairs and changed out of my sleeping clothes. Usually I would stay at Chelsea's house but it seemed like they wanted sometime alone.

I went to Chelsea's room when I was done, and she and Carmen were cuddling and watching a movie on her bed.

"I'm going home now, I need to talk to Glen and clear my head a bit."

"Are you going to be ok?" Chelsea asks.

"Yea I think…I think I'm ready to tell Glen." I say taking a deep breath.

"What do you think he will say?" Carmen asks.

"I honestly don't know. I mean we aren't super close but we are close. I just hope it goes well." I sigh.

"Good luck, and if anything you are more than welcome to come back here." Chelsea says with a smile.

"Thanks Chels, I will see you later or if things go as I hope, then I'll see you Monday. Bye." I say and turn to leave.

"Later Spence, and if anything you can always call." Chelsea reassures.

I turn around, "Thanks Chelsea. I love you." I'm sure she knows, but she has always been there for me. I'm lucky to have a friend like her.

"Love you too, Spence."

I left Chelsea's house, determined to set a few things straight. First, I wanted to talk to Glen. I don't like hiding this from him. I guess in a way this would also be like a test. I would see how he reacts, to kind of get a feel about how my parents would react. I hate that being a lesbian is such a big deal to people. Whatever.

After I talk to Glen, I need to talk to Ashley. I think it would be fair if I got her side of the story before I start hating her.

When I pull up to my house, I notice that my parents are not home, surprise surprise. They are always working.

I do notice that Aiden's car is here. I wonder if Ashley told him about everything that had happened with me. Does he even know that she had online friends? Does he know that I am one of her online friends? Does he know that I'm gay?

I have so many questions and the smart thing to do would be to talk to Ashley to get answers but of course I don't want to do that.

After I park my car, I take my bags and walk straight into the house. I don't see Aiden or Glen in the living room playing video games like they usually are. That's weird.

I make my way up to my room and I hear talking coming from Glen's room. I guess they are in there. I keep walking to my room, and I as soon as I open the door, I'm shocked by who's sitting on my bed.

She looks like she's deep in thought and sad about something.

"Um…what are you doing here?" I ask a stupid question because I know exactly why she is here.

She stood up and walked closer to me. I took a step back and she looked a little hurt.

"I wanted to talk to you." She replies and goes back to sit on my bed.

I walk in and set my bags down by my door and take a seat at my desk, leaving enough room between us.

"How long have you been here?" Yea because that's important right now. I guess I am trying to ease myself into this dreaded conversation.

"I came like an hour ago when Aiden said he was coming over." She runs her hand through her curls. "I just really wanted to talk to you about everything that happened last night. I couldn't leave things the way they were."

I stay quiet because I'm not sure what to say.

"I'm sorry, Spencer." She says sincerely.

"Sorry for what exactly? Sorry for kissing me? Sorry for not telling me you knew who I was? Sorry for making me think that I did something wrong? Sorry for what, Ashley?" I almost yell. Now I am angry.

"I'm sorry for all of it." And just when the tears start to form she adds, "But I am not sorry for kissing you. I can never be sorry for something that was so amazing and incredible."

I slightly smile, but then I remember that I am still mad at her.

"Ashley what I really want to know is why didn't you tell me?" She sighs and looks down. "Do you know that for the entire time that you went avoiding me, I thought I did something wrong?"

She looks up. "No, I didn't mean for you to feel that way."

"This girl that I just started to become friends with is all of a sudden ignoring me. How else am I supposed to feel?" I throw my hands up expressing my anger.

"When I found out that you were the girl that I was talking to online, I didn't know what to do. I was scared and happy. I didn't know how I would tell you; I wasn't even sure how I would face you the next day, so I didn't."

"Why were you scared?" I ask because I am really curious.

"I was scared because for one, I never have feelings for people. And when I found out that the two people I was crushing on were the same person, I just freaked out. And I was scared that if you knew I was LABabe4u then you wouldn't want anything to do with me." Ashley said in one breath.

"Why wouldn't I want anything to do with you? I told you that I liked Ashley and LAbabe4u." I am confused.

"I know but you didn't know that I was LAbabe4u. If I had told you, then you would have thought that Ashley, the friend that you just made, lied to you about everything. I thought that once you figured out that I was gay and in a fake relationship, then you would hate me." She says sadly and looks down.

"I would not have hated you for that. I understand why you do it. I just wish you would have told me sooner." I tell her honestly.

"I would have, but every time I went to talk to you, Kendra or Chelsea and Carmen were around. And I wasn't sure how to bring it up."

"Then what made you finally do it at the party? Why did you even follow us into the room?" I ask.

"I was watching you and Kendra all night, even though I didn't want to. I just couldn't take my eyes off of you two. I got so jealous when I saw you two going upstairs, that I knew I had to say something."

I probably would have done the same thing if I was in her position.

"If you would have talked to me, I probably would not have been with her in the first place."

She smiles after I say this, but unfortunately she will not be smiling for long.

"But I do want to know something." She gives me a questioning look, and I lean back in my chair. "Tell me what happened between you and Kendra." And her frown is gone.

"Have you talked to her about this already?" She asks with a shaky voice.

"Yea last night, she told me her side and I want to know your side of the story now."

"I guess that's fair enough. But I should tell you that her story is mostly correct, unfortunately." She says with a sorrowful look. "Ok so we met at the club and we became friends with benefits. She was really the only real friend I had besides Aiden. After we were done, you know, we would just talk and I started to appreciate having her there for the talks almost more than the sex. One day, Madison came over to my house after Kendra was leaving and she saw us kissing by the door. She waited in her car until after Kendra left to come in. She confronted me about it and told me that if I didn't stop seeing her then she would tell the whole school about us and that I would be kicked off the squad. At the time, I really didn't want that so I gave up my friendship with Kendra just because I didn't want to deal with the school knowing I was gay."

She sighed and stood up then she began pacing.

"When I got to school the next day, everyone was looking at me with pity in their eyes. I had no idea what was going on. I asked some of the cheerleaders on the squad and they told me that Madison told the whole squad that when she came over to my house, she saw Kendra trying to kiss me. I was so pissed. I went up to Madison and yelled at her for it. She told me that there couldn't be a gay cheerleader so she had to do something before Kendra did." She wiped her eyes, and this reminded me of Kendra crying when she told me this story. "When we ran into Kendra that day, I couldn't even look her in the eye. Madison yelled at her saying that she should stop attacking me because I wasn't gay. I know I should have stood up for her, but I didn't. I just sat back and let everyone hate her and call her names." She was full on crying now. I feel bad for both for both of them. And now I hate that slut, Madison.

"Why didn't you say anything?" I probe.

She let out a bitter laugh. "Because I cared so much about what everyone thought of me. I didn't want to deal with being gay, so I said nothing and let her get harassed."

"Have you tried to apologize or anything? I mean she is still really hurt by that." I tell her.

"I know, but I am too much of a coward to face her. I do miss her though." I raise my eyebrow at her. "Not like that but as a friend."

"She is a great friend. I'm glad she's in my life." I say honestly.

Ashley opens her mouth like she wants to say something, but then shuts it. "What?" I question.

"Are…are you two…um together?" She asks hesitantly.

"Um not officially. We went out on a date, but last night is as close as we got."

"Oh do you like her?" She asks, and I am not sure if I want to answer.

Do I tell her that I like her a lot more than I like Kendra? I don't know what's going to happen between me and Ashley or me and Kendra. Fucking high school drama.

"Yea I do." Nothing better than the truth.

"Oh." She says a little dejectedly. "So do you forgive me for all of the stupid things I've done?"

"I will, on two conditions." I say with a smile.

"Ok name them." She replies happily.

"One, you apologize to Kendra." She doesn't look to happy about that one. "Two, you never ignore me again. If you have a problem, please come and talk to me about it."

"Deal. Can we shake on it?" She is so cute. I nod and she puts out her hand for a hand shake, but I pull her in for a hug instead. She lets out a happy sigh and I almost lose myself in her smell. When we pull back she says "Thank you."

"For what?" I respond.

"For forgiving me and making me happy." She grins.

"Yea yea." I say and then my stomach starts grumbling.

"Sounds like someone's hungry. Do you want to go get something to eat?" Aww she's sweet.

"Yea that sounds good actually. Let's go see if the guys want anything." I say as I walk out my bedroom door.

I walk to Glen's room and knock, but I get no answer. They are probably so into their game, that they didn't hear the door.

I shake my head at that thought and open the door. "Hey Gle…whoa. What the fuck?"

I think I just lost my appetite.

**A/N: Yay cliff hanger! I hope you enjoyed the chapter, it wasn't one of my favorites but it was necessary. Let me know what you think!**


	18. Chapter 18

**Oh look another update. This is for the people that constantly review. Here is my thank you to all of you; I hope I show my appreciation well enough in this chapter. **

"SPENCER, GET OUT!" Glen yells and I immediately shut the door.

"You might want to open your eyes now." I hear Ashley giggle when she says this.

"I'm too scared to." I say with my eyes still closed.

"Come on." She grabs my hand and I relax a little. "We are going down the stairs, so I would advise you to open your eyes now."

I open them and I am relieved to see the Glen is nowhere around. Even though I opened my eyes, I still hold on to her hand.

When we get downstairs, she leads me to the living room and we sit on the couch. Unfortunately, this means I have to let go of her hand.

"So yea, I should have warned you about that. I've walked in on them once and yea it was probably similar to what you just saw." She laughs.

"You knew about them?" I ask disbelievingly and she nods. "How long?"

She opens her mouth to answer, but is interrupted.

"Spencer, why the hell didn't you knock?" Glen yells as he walks down the stairs, Aiden following behind him with his head down. I can't even look at them together; gross images are going through my head.

"I did, but you didn't answer. Now I know why." I say looking at him. Both Glen and Aiden turn red and look down.

"Ok but that doesn't mean come in that means I'm busy." Glen says.

"How was I supposed to know that I was going to walk in on Aiden's head bobbing between your legs?" I exclaim.

Glen opens his mouth to say something, but nothing comes out. And the silence makes it awkward.

"So anyone hungry?" Ashley says from beside me. And all of sudden, everyone starts laughing. We laugh so hard that tears are rolling down our faces. I don't know why that was so funny but it was.

A half hour later, we ended up at In N' Out Burger. After we got our food, we found a booth in the back of the restaurant. I of course sat next to Ashley while Glen and Aiden sat on the opposite side of us.

We dug into our food, but there was no conversation. The awkwardness that I thought we left at the house was back again.

"So are you guys ready for the basketball season to start?" Ashley asks as she tries to break the silence.

"Yea we have our first game this Friday. I'm sure we won't have a problem winning though." Aiden responds. "Right Glen?"

"Yea we have been practicing for a while so I'm sure we will do fine." He says before taking a bite of his burger. "Are you ready for your first game Spencer?"

I shrug. "I don't know if I will even play. We haven't found out who will be starting yet."

"I'm sure you will be starting. The coach would be crazy not to start you." Glen says.

"Right, so how long have you two been dating?" I blurt out. Aiden spits out his drink and Glen chokes on his food. "I mean you are dating right or is it like a friends with benefits sort of thing?"

Ashley starts to laugh and I just look at her like she's crazy. I really don't understand what's so funny.

No one answers me so I continue. "I never thought you were gay Glen. You were always so into girls."

"Ok ok just stop." Glen finally speaks up. "I was always into girls. I never thought about guys until I found out that Aiden was gay." He paused to take a sip of his drink.

"How long have you known about this?" I ask.

"He told me over the summer. I asked him if I could tag along with him and Ashley to a club and he said yes. When we got there, he and Ashley immediately split up. I thought it was weird but I didn't question it. Then later that night, I saw Ashley making out with some chick in the back of the club. I asked Aiden about it and he said she does that all the time. Anyway later that night, he told me about their plan. I was surprised when he told me all of this, but he was still my friend either way." Glen finished.

"Ok so when did you two start doing whatever it is that you are doing?" I question.

"Last weekend I stayed over at his house. Before that I had been looking at him differently. And to spare you the details we ended up kissing and I freaked out and left. Later that day he called and we talked everything through." He stops and smiles at Aiden. "And to answer your question, yes we are dating."

"Wow this is almost hard to believe." I almost whisper because I am saying it more to myself than anyone else.

"I know. When Aiden called me, I was extremely pissed because I wanted to spend time with you, but then when he said it was an emergency, I was not expecting to find out that Glen kissed him." Ashley says with a laugh.

"Well I'm sorry for interrupting your 'Spencer time' but I was surprised and confused. And I don't know what you are complaining for; you spent the entire time gushing about the time you spent with her anyway." Aiden says using air quotes around Spencer time and Ashley blushes.

I blush too. I can't believe she actually talks about me. I thought I was the only one to obsess over her. I feel extremely happy that she has been talking about me

"I did not do that!" Ashley yells and hits Aiden in the arm.

"Yes you did! The entire time you were like 'Spencer is so cute, and sweet. And oh my gosh Aiden, have you seen her eyes? They are amazingly beautiful and ow!'" I guess Ashley kicked him because now he is clutching his leg under the table. "I hate you." He tells Ashley.

Aww she is so cute. Why do I have to like her so much? This only makes everything harder.

"Yea well you deserved that." Ashley says with a smile.

"So Spence, what's up with you and Ashley?" Glen says with a smirk.

"I…she…its complicated?" I spit out.

"Is that a question or are you telling me?" Glen teases.

I turn to Ashley. "Have you told them about the whole online thing?" I whisper to her.

"Aiden knows about the girl from online, but he doesn't know that you and her are the same person." She whispers back.

I turn to the boys who are looking at us expectantly.

"We actually met online before we met in person." Glen and Aiden both look surprised.

"So you mean that the girl from online that you were obsessed with is Spencer?" Aiden says to Ashley. She nods and he laughs. "This is just too good."

"We met online and she was the first girl that I actually had feelings for. Then I met Ashley and I immediately liked her. I mean how can you not?" I smiled at her. "Then she found out that I was also her online friend and stopped talking to me." She looked down, and I held her hand to let her know that I am ok with it now. "She told me after she kissed me at the party last night and long story short; we cleared the air this morning."

"Ok so what now?" Aiden asks

I shrug. "I don't know. If I would have found out when she found out things would have been great, but now I'm kinda seeing someone." I respond feeling a little bad.

"Who?" Glen asks.

"Kendra Wilson." I reply quietly. Aiden gives a look to Ashley and Glen just smiles.

"How the hell did you pull that one off? She is one of the hottest girls in school?" Glen exclaims proudly.

"I don't know. She asked me out on a date and I said yes."

"So I'm ready to go, everyone else finished?" Ashley suddenly says and gets up. That was weird.

We got to my house ten minutes later. I got out of the car and walked to the door, but turned around when I realized that no one was following me.

"Are you guys coming or what?" I say to them.

"Aiden has to go so I'm just saying bye to him." Glen says and they walk to Aiden's car.

I look at Ashley expectantly and she looks at the ground.

"I should probably go. I have a lot of homework to catch up on and stuff." She says and I can tell that she is lying but I don't say anything.

"Ok I'll see you at school or maybe we can hang out tomorrow or something." I suggest.

"Yea maybe. I'll see you later." She says and turns to Aiden's car. I wonder what's up with her. I didn't do anything wrong, I think.

I walk in the house and plop down on the couch. Glen came in a few minutes later and sat down next to me.

"What's the deal with Ashley?" He asks.

"I have no idea. Everything was fine and then she just started acting weird." I reply.

"Oh well. She will come around." He shrugs. "You know I always knew you were gay."

"How the hell did you know when I didn't even know?" I ask disbelievingly.

"Well you were never into the guys that you dated. Then when you first met Ashley, I knew for sure." Before I can even say anything else, he keeps talking. "I saw the look that you gave her, the look in your eyes, and the big smile that was on your face. When I saw you two together the next day, I was hoping that something had happened, but it didn't obviously."

"I really do like Ashley." I say quietly.

"Then why aren't you with her?" He asks looking directly into my eyes.

"Because it's just not that easy. I like Kendra. She's open and honest with me. And if we did decide to make it official I know that she won't want to hide our relationship." I know that it will be hard for Ashley to come out if we did date. And I am honestly afraid of what will happen if it comes down to me or her reputation.

"People change. You might be the one that makes Ashley change."

"I guess." I say. "Enough with this, let's play some Madden." I say and then I get up to turn the game on. I grab the controllers and throw him one.

"This is another reason why I thought you might be gay. I never met a girl that loves video games so much." He laughs.

"Whatever. Less talking and more playing." I say.

Sometime later, our parents walk through the door.

"Hey kids!" They say.

"Who's winning?" My dad says.

"Arthur you should not be encouraging Spencer. She should be doing more feminine things like shopping, not playing video games." Of course my mom would say this.

I press pause on the game and turn to my mom. "I play basketball mom. How is that any more feminine?"

"That's different. That's more like exercise. And you have to stay fit for all of the guys you will meet in college." She winks at me. My face immediately turns into one of disgust.

I drop the controller and go upstairs without another word. I get to my room and I notice that Glen is right behind me. He comes inside my room and closes the door.

"Why is she uhhh?" I can't even find the right word to describe her.

"That's just how she is Spence, it's how she's always been." He takes a seat at my desk while I sit on my bed.

We stay in silence for a bit.

"How do you think she will react when she finds out that both of her kids are gay?" Glen asks.

"First she will faint, then she will send us to church so we can pray for forgiveness for our sinful ways, and lastly she will send us away to some anti-gay camp. Oh and we will move back to Ohio, with the rest of the small minded people that we left behind." I say like it's nothing because it's probably true. "I'm afraid to see what she might say or do. I know that it won't be pretty." I add.

I look at Glen and he seems to have a faraway look on his face.

"Whatever happens, we will still have each other." He says to me with a smile. I get up and hug him.

"Thanks. Let's just hope it doesn't get too bad." He nods. "Ok now get out I need to change."

He stands up. "Alright. I'm going to Aiden's house. I'll be back later." I shake my head at him and smile.

"Don't do anything I wouldn't do." I immediately regret saying that.

"You have nothing to worry about then." Glen says with a smile and a wink.

"Eww gross, just get out!" I push him out of my room and lock the door.

After changing, I ran down stairs and started my run. My mom always has a way of stressing me out. Why does she have to be such a judgmental bitch?

I end up running fast for I don't know how long or how far, but I only stop when I hear music off in the distance. I take out one of my headphones so I can find out where the music is coming from. I look around and realize that I made it past my school and now I am by the playground. I turn around as I am trying to find where the music is coming from. My eyes stop on a figure under the tree. I smile as I think of Ashley and I sitting under that same tree the first time we actually talked.

And suddenly, I find myself walking towards the tree. When I get closer, I notice who is sitting under the tree. She continues to play like no one else is around. She is so into her music and she flawlessly hits every note on the guitar and while singing. She is simply amazing.

When she finishes the song, I walk closer. She turns her head when she sees me coming. She is obviously shocked by my presence.

"What are you doing here?" She asks when I get closer.

"I was on a run and I heard the music and somehow I ended up here."

"Oh" She says and she puts her guitar to the side.

"Is everything ok with you? I mean are we ok?" I ask tentatively.

She takes a deep breath. She doesn't say anything. She just looks off into the distance.

"What's wrong Ashley? Did I do something?" I ask and take a seat next to her.

She finally turns to me and says something. "No you didn't do anything. You are perfect."

I blush at her words. I am always blushing around her.

"Then why does it seem like you don't want to be around me?" I ask.

"I like you!" She blurts out. She takes a minute to regain her composure. "Like a lot. I have never had such strong feelings for someone before. It scares me to be honest."

"So you're trying to push me away? What will that solve?"

"I know it's stupid, but it's not only that." She says. And now I am even more curious. "I like you so much but it feels like I can't have you." I open my mouth to say something. "When we were at the restaurant with Glen and Aiden, everything just felt so right. But then, you brought up being with Kendra and something inside me just clicked. I just couldn't handle –" She stopped because I cut her off with my lips.

Her rambling was just so cute that I couldn't help myself. And with her talking about getting jealous, I was immediately turned on. She pulls my closer and I moan at the feeling of my body pressed up against hers. I let my hands flow through her curls while I pull her impossibly closer, and this time she moans. Her hands roam to my waist. I am only wearing a sports bra and shorts, so her fingers leave a trail of goose bumps wherever they roam. She takes her fingers and run them across my forming abs and I shiver and kiss her harder.

The next thing I know, I am on top of her and she is lying down in the grass. My hands go to the bottom of tank top and I squeeze her hips. She bucks up into me and I smile into the kiss.

"Ashley?" I hear someone ask and I jump off of her hastily.

I turn to look at who interrupted us and see none other than "Madison?" Ashley questions as she shields her eyes from the sun to get a better look at her.

**A/N: Ahh cliff hangers! Aren't they fun? How did you like the chapter? Did you love it or hate it? Tell me what you think. Thanks for the reviews and the consistent reviews from some of you. I love them all. **


	19. Chapter 19

**I probably look like an idiot when I read the reviews because of my constant smile. I just can't help it. Thank you all!**

"M-Madison, what are you doing here?" Ashley stutters out and moves away from me.

I am really nervous to see how this will play out. I mean this is almost the same exact situation that Ashley was in with Kendra and we all know how that turned out.

"Cut the chit chat Ash. The real question is what are you doing here making out with little Carlin?" She says snidely.

Ashley looks at me then at Madison, and says nothing. It looks like she's having an internal debate about what she should do. It's either me or her reputation.

"I thought you were past the whole lesbian phase." She adds. And Ashley is still quiet. Why is she always quiet when I want her to talk the most?

Madison just puts her hands on her hips and raises her eyebrows as she waits for an answer. I am waiting for one as well. And still, Ashley says nothing.

Soon, I get tired of waiting. How hard can it be to give a simple answer? Me or her reputation.

With her silence, I don't think I can handle the answer. I don't think I can handle being lied about right now. I don't want to have to go through what Kendra went through. So I decide to leave before I can get hurt.

"I'm gonna go." I say as I get up and start walking away.

By the time I get to the street, I start running again. I'm kinda upset and disappointed because I was half expecting Ashley to call after me and try to stop me, but that didn't happen. She just let me walk away like it was nothing. Like everything that happened between us meant absolutely nothing to her. I guess her reputation meant more, and I wasn't worth it.

I know we weren't dating and we hadn't done more than kiss, but I have strong feelings for her and I was hoping that whatever we had would go into something more. I mean we were talking for weeks, just getting to know each other, so it's not like we just met.

Nothing is ever easy. I hope that Madison has grown up a little within the last year. I don't mind the school knowing that I'm gay, but I want to come out when I'm ready.

When I get home, I notice that both of my parents are as well. I just hope my mom isn't anywhere near the door because I don't want to talk to her right now.

When I walk through the door I quickly realize that luck is not on my side today.

"Oh Spencer, I was wondering where you were. I saw your car out front, but you weren't here." My mom says in a worried tone.

"Yea I just went for a run." I tell her as I try to quickly head to the stairs. Alone time with my mom is never good.

"You've been working out a lot lately. I thought basketball alone would be enough. Is there a particular reason?" She says with a knowing smile. Well what she thinks she knows.

"No mom. I just run when I need to think. It helps." I reply in a monotone voice.

"Are you sure that there is no boy you are trying to impress?" She asks, yet again with that oh so knowing smile.

See, alone time with my mom is never good.

"Nope, no boys." I tell her and lean against the banister.

She sighs heavily. "Spencer I don't see why you don't date, it's not like you are unattractive, and you are smart. I'm sure you have a bunch of guys that would love to go out with you."

"Maybe, but I don't want to date them." Maybe I shouldn't have said that.

"Well why not? Do you want me to set you up with a nice church boy?" She says with a proud smile. Why in the world would I want that?

"No mom, I'm fine. I just want to concentrate on my school work." I tell her hoping that she falls for it. "I want my grades to be as good as possible so I can have options for college." I add just in case what I said before wasn't enough. And I know she will give in now because she's always on my ass about college.

"Oh Spencer, you're home. I feel like I haven't seen you in weeks." My dad says as he walks out of the kitchen with his famous 'Mr. Goodlookin is Cookin" apron on. I laugh every time I see him with that on because Glen and I bought him that as a joke one father's day.

"Hey dad, I just got in from my run." I say pointing to my workout clothes. "And yea I haven't seen you in a while. I feel like you are always working." I tell him sadly. I miss my dad but I understand that he has a job that needs to be done in order to pay for everything that we have.

"I know and I'm sorry hunny work has been a little crazy lately." He says regretfully. "Hey they are starting to play Halloween movies on TV. After dinner we can get some candy and watch them together. What do you think?" He asks.

I really could use a distraction from this whole Ashley situation. And it's not like I have anything better to do tonight besides homework. To give me even more motive, I have really missed spending time with my father.

Around the holiday season we always watch the cheesy holiday movies, just the two of us. It sort of stopped over the past few years as he has been getting more into his job but I hope this year we can start it up again. It might be the last year we will be able to because I will be leaving for college.

"Yea I'm going to go wash up. Call me when dinner is ready." I say as I walk up to the stairs but not missing his warm smile before I leave.

After a nice relaxing shower, I change into comfy sweats and a tank top. I sit on my bed and take out my notebook. Between writing and running are the two ways I can relieve stress as well as just enjoy.

A few minutes into writing my dad calls me downstairs for dinner. When I get there I notice that everyone is already sitting and Glen even came back from Aiden's house.

"So how have you kids been?" Mom asks as we start eating.

"Good, I have my first game this Friday." Glen says with a mouth full of food.

"Oh that's right. Do you think the team is ready?" Dad asks sincerely.

Glen nods and says "Oh yea definitely. The first team we are playing is not that great."

"Should be an easy win, either way I'm sure you will do great." Dad says with a smile. My dad is awesome. I just wish he was around more often. "How about you Spence, are you ready for your first game?"

"I guess, but I don't know if I will actually play." I tell him honestly.

"You are too good to sit on the bench. I'm sure you will play." My mom says optimistically. "And we will be at both of your games to watch you play." She adds with a smile.

These are the moments that I like. Just spending time with my family and not worrying about any drama outside of the house.

"Is it ok if I stay at Aiden's house tonight?" Glen asks. I look at him and give him a smile. I'm really happy for him.

"Yea I don't see why not. I have to go back to the hospital anyway so we aren't doing anything special" Mom responds. After a second or so she continues. "Is your friend Aiden single?" I look at Glen and as soon as our eyes connect we start laughing. "I just think that he's a good guy and he and Spencer would get along great." She says proud that she thought of such a great plan. I'm sure she is already giving herself the Matchmaker of the Year award right now. Glen and I are still trying not to choke on our food because this is just too funny. If only you knew mom, if only you knew.

Glen calms down enough to reply. "No mom he is dating someone actually."

"Well good for him." She says then turns her attention to me. "I'm sure you will find a nice guy soon."

Glen begins to laugh again and I not so subtly kick him under the table.

"I'm sure I will mom." I say and smile at her.

After dinner, I helped dad wash the dishes. When we finished that we gathered our junk food and start watching our movies.

"Spencer how have you been lately?" My dad asks as he turns to me after the second movie has ended.

I shrug. I have been a little stressed. Things in my life have changed and still are changing and I am not quite sure how to deal with everything yet. That is what I want to say but I don't because I know that he will ask questions and I'm not sure if I am ready for that or not.

"I've been ok." I say simply. He looks at me as if he is trying to see if I am telling the truth or not. "What?" I say after a few minutes of him just looking at me.

She shakes his head. "Something about you is different. I'm not quite sure what it is yet, but something is different."

This is my open gate to tell him. He is basically telling me to tell him right now. All I have to do is open my mouth and say 'I like girls' or 'I'm a lesbian.' But of course, none of those come out.

"What if…what if…I don't know…never mind." Is what I finally say.

"You know whatever it is, you can talk to me." He says sincerely.

"I know dad, I just need to think. I promise that I will come to you when I am ready."

"That's all that I ask." He says with a smile. He then stretches and yawns. "I think I'm going to go to bed. All of that work is catching up with me."

"Goodnight dad." I say and hug him.

"Goodnight Spencer." He kisses my forehead then heads to the stairs. Suddenly he turns back around. "And whatever it is I will always love you, no matter what."

"Thanks dad." I give him a smile.

I know I should have said something, but I just couldn't do it. I hate that I have this secret that I am keeping from my parents but this is big and I just need it to come out at the right time.

I spent Sunday doing homework and cleaning my room. I didn't really talk to anyone either, I just needed some alone time. And now I finally go back to school after a very interesting weekend. The feeling is kind of bittersweet because I really just want to go so I can find out if I will be starting on Friday. Then I really want to just stay home because I am afraid to see what is in store for me with the whole Ashley situation. I guess I will just have to wait to see what happens when I get there.

And when I do get there, it is the same as any other school day. A few cars in the parking lot with people scattered around campus.

As usual, I get out of my car and head to the quad. The one thing that is different about today is Ashley and Kendra sitting at my usual table. This should be interesting.

"Hey Kendra how are you?" I ask completely ignoring Ashley. I don't even bother siting down because I have a feeling that I will just be leaving anyway.

Kendra gives me a confused look because obviously she noticed that I didn't say anything to Ashley.

"I'm as good as anyone can be on a Monday morning." She chuckles.

"I understand. I really don't want to be here today. I just want to see if I am starting and leave." I tell her honestly.

"Spencer can we please talk?" Ashley asks.

"Oh she speaks. I thought you forgot how to do that." I say sarcastically.

"Ok I deserved that but I just want to explain." She responds.

"Ok" Is all I say and wait for her to say something. I am being a bitch but she really hurt me.

She looks awkwardly at Kendra and then back to me.

"I have to go talk to my physics teacher about that assignment yea, so I will see you later Spencer." She smiles at me then turns to Ashley. "Thank you for actually apologizing, it meant a lot. Even though I am over everything now, I was still hurt by it. I hope we can at least be civil towards each other now."

"I hope so too. I've missed you." Ashley says smiling at Kendra. I shouldn't get jealous, but I am.

"Ok I'll see you two around." She waves and leaves us alone.

I sit where she was just sitting. I really want to know what Ashley is going to say. I want to know if I should let her go or if I should even hope that we might become something one day.

"I guess I should start by saying sorry for how I acted Saturday." She says looking straight at me.

"I just want to know why you didn't say anything at all."

"I…I just…" She takes a deep breath and looks around for a minute. "I was afraid and shocked. I didn't know what to say without hurting either one of you."

I scoff. "Hurt her? How would you have hurt Madison? She just wants you to be how she wants you to be, so that you make her look good."

"I know but what was I supposed to do. She would go around start telling everyone. I just don't know if I'm ready for that yet."

I shake my head and give her a bitter laugh. "It's good to know that I'm not worth it. Now I know how much your reputation really means to you. I thought you were better than that." She looks down as if she is ashamed. "I guess I don't know you at all."

I get up to leave because this conversation was over before it even started.

"You are worth it." I hear Ashley say before I can get too far. I turn around to hear what else she has to say. "I know that you are worth it. Spencer you have no idea how you make me feel." She walks closer to me and continues to talk. "I just want to be around you all of the time. I love making you laugh and smile because as cliché as it sounds, my day actually gets brighter whenever you do. And you are so sweet. You are still my friend, well were, even after you knew about what happened with Kendra. And you know me Spencer, the real me. It only took you a few weeks to do that and I'm still not sure how you did it, but you did."

I should be overjoyed, ecstatic, jumping for joy, but I'm not.

"If all of that is true, if I am worth it, then why are you still pretending to be straight?" I ask her as I stare into her eyes.

"If I come out, I don't want it to be for nothing. You still have this thing going on with Kendra. Do you know how I would feel if I did all of this for you just to watch you be with her?" She runs her hands through her hair. "You make it seem like I am such a bad person but you aren't perfect Spencer. How do you think you make me and Kendra feel when you play around with our feelings?" Ashley explains and I feel like the worse person ever.

"I like Kendra, yes. But nowhere near as much as I like you. I just don't want you to hurt me like you did to Kendra. If you chose to be with me without lying to everyone then I would be with you in a second. I just don't want to be your little secret." I tell her honestly. "Do you know how much it hurt when you just sat there and said nothing when Madison saw us kissing? I felt like crap and I think I don't ever want to feel like that again. So if you are willing to let everyone know that you want to be with a girl, with me, then you won't have to worry about me playing any sort of game. If you want everyone to think that you are as straight as they already think, then just tell me that and I will leave you alone for good." I tell her almost angrily. I am trying my hardest not to cry, but I don't know how much longer I can hold the tears back.

And as always, when I want Ashley to talk she is quiet. Her phone goes off. She takes it out and reads a text I guess. Then she looks up at something across the quad. I follow her vision and see Madison staring at us. Ashley looks back at me with sad eyes and says "I have to go."

I guess I have my answer. I turn around and leave her standing there. I guess I wasn't really worth it in the end is what I think while the tears start falling from my eyes.

**A/N: I'm not sure how I feel about this chapter. What do you think? And I know it doesn't seem like things are looking too good for Spashley right now, but shit happens. But things will get better eventually. **


	20. Chapter 20

**Oh wow so many mixed reviews. I was not expecting that, but thanks for the reviews. And I am sorry that some of you seem to not like the last chapter, but like I said shit happens. I hope you like this chapter.**

Right when I was outside of my class, I wiped all of my tears away. I feel stupid for even crying, for letting all of this get to me. I guess I am just so overwhelmed with everything and I am not quite sure how to handle it.

After taking a few deep breaths, I walk in the class and take my seat in the back. Then I just remembered that Ashley has this class as well. I guess we all can't avoid our problems.

I just put my head down and waited for the bell to ring. I didn't want to face her when she walked in.

Five minutes later, the bell rang and the teacher began to talk, but Ashley never came. I could tell without even lifting my head up. I know that sounds weird but every time Ashley gets close to me I get this feeling that runs through my body, and I didn't get one this time. I lift my head up and look around the classroom just to make sure that the feeling didn't go away and sure enough it didn't, she is not in class.

I wonder where she can be. I hope she didn't skip class because of me. I hope she is ok and nothing bad happened. I'll just wait for fourth period or lunch to see if she shows up.

When fourth period came around, Ashley was still not there. And I was really worried. Is she really going to skip her classes to avoid me?

Maybe it's not even about me, something could be seriously wrong with her.

After fourth period, I left my class and walked to the quad searching for Ashley as I walked. Unfortunately, I didn't see her anywhere.

When I got to my table, Carmen, Chelsea, and Kendra were already there.

"Hey Spencer" Kendra says with a smile as I sit down next to her.

Carmen and Chelsea give me some sort of greeting and turn back to each other. They are always off in their own little world. I turn to Kendra and I give her a smile and take out my lunch to begin eating. I chance a glance towards Ashley's table and she isn't there. I see Madison and the rest of the cheerleaders, but she isn't there. If Madison wasn't such a bitch, then I would go over there and ask her if she knew what happened with Ashley.

"Are you ok Spencer?" Kendra asks me and snaps my attention back to the table. Hearing this, Carmen and Chelsea both turn their attention to us. I love that they care so much about me.

"Yea I am fine. I'm just a little worried about Ashley." I tell them and I receive a bunch of confused looks. "We got into an argument this morning and I basically told her that I would stay away from her. I haven't seen her since then."

"Did she seem really upset about the fight?" Carmen asks.

"I don't know. She was mad during the fight but after she just went to talk to Madison." I tell them. "And Madison is right over there without Ashley." I point towards the table with all of the other cheerleaders. They turn their heads to look and turn back realizing that Ashley is not there.

"Maybe she went home. The fight might have really gotten to her." Chelsea says.

"What was the argument about anyway?" Kendra asks.

And suddenly I don't feel like talking anymore. If I tell her what the entire argument was about she will definitely hate me. I know I need to talk to her about everything soon because I know nothing will come of me and her being together. I just don't want to hurt her, but I know if I keep stringing her along I will hurt her more. Gosh everything that Ashley said is really getting to me.

"Uhh nothing important really." I smile at her.

She gives me a weird look and then smiles weakly back.

"Are you ready for practice today?" Kendra asks me.

"Yea I am really anxious to see if I will start at the game this Friday."

"Coach will be crazy if she doesn't start you. You are easily the best person on the team." I blush at her words.

"Thanks. I hope you are right. And if I start then I know that you will be too."

After lunch I went to class with Chelsea and she tried to get me to talk about the argument but I just told her that I would tell her later.

During basketball practice everyone seemed to try to outdo each other. I figured that if Coach was choosing who she wanted to start then she would have already chosen by now, so I just went along with the drills as normal.

Some of the veterans seem to think that they would be starting and that all of the newbies would be subs. I hope Coach proves them wrong so they can take those smug looks off their faces.

"Ok ladies gather round!" Coach yells at the end of practice. Everyone makes a circle around coach. "So I'm sure you all are anxious to know who will be playing tomorrow." Everyone yells. "Ok ok quiet down." She waits for us to get quiet before starting again. "For my starters I have Parker, Johnson, Sanchez, Wilson, and Carlin. Good job ladies, all of the hard work has paid off." Haha those smug smiles immediately vanished. Then I noticed people looking at me and oh shit, I'm starting. I'm actually starting!

I am completely stunned. I honestly didn't think that I would actually start.

"Spencer we did it!" Kendra says as she hugs me.

"I know this is freaking amazing!" I hug her back.

"For the next few practices, I will have my starters playing against my first subs. We need to be ready for the game this Friday. I have faith in us." She stops then looks around at the team. "I'll see you all tomorrow at practice."

We start heading to the showers and I am way to excited to stay here any longer. I just grab my bag full of clothes and leave.

"Hey wait up." I hear Kendra yell from behind me and I stop. "Where are you in a rush to?"

"I don't know, I just didn't want to stay there. I feel like doing something." I tell her with a big smile.

"Maybe…maybe we can go out tonight. You know celebrate, just the two of us?" She asks hesitantly and in a rush.

And now my mood is immediately ruined because I know that what I have to do will hurt her.

"Actually I've meaning to talk to you about that." I tell her and her smile is gone just as quickly. "I just don't want to hurt you, Kendra. You are a great friend and that's what I think we should be. . . just friends." I hold my breath waiting for her response. I hate that I have to do this but I know that it will be for the best in the long run.

"Oh" She looks away from me. "I mean I guess if you don't like me that way then it will be for the best."

"I'm really sorry, Kendra. I wish we could be together because you are an amazing girl. Any girl would be lucky to be with." I add hoping that it cheers her up a little bit.

"You think so?" She asks hopefully.

"Of course." I smile at her.

We start walking towards the parking lot again.

"Oh look there's Ashley." Kendra says and I turn around so fast I could have gotten whiplash.

She is standing next to Aiden's car talking to him and Glen. She is only wearing a tight tank top and short shorts. I really would like to sit in during one of those cheerleading practices. Glen and Aiden look like they just had the hardest workout of their lives. They have sweat all over their shirts and their faces are dripping with sweat as well. Eww.

I decide that it would be best if I just kept walking. I just wanted to know if Ashley was ok and it seems like she is fine. I keep walking and Kendra follows.

"Hey Spencer!" I hear Glen yell. I look over and he is waving me over. Aiden is looking over here as well and Ashley is avoiding this direction completely.

"Damn" I whisper yell under my breath and Kendra laughs. "Don't laugh because you are coming with me." And suddenly she doesn't find anything funny anymore.

"I have to go ho-" I turn to glare at her before she can finish. "You know I was thinking that I should go say hi to Ashley actually." I smile in triumph and pull her over to the others.

I slow my speed once we get closer, but I still hold on to Kendra's hand.

"You know Kendra right?" I ask everyone when we finally reach them but mainly talking to Glen and Aiden. Both of them nod their heads and give her a hey or hi. I notice Ashley look down at my hand which was still holding Kendra's. As discretely as I could, I let go. "What did you want Glen?"

"So?" Glen asks like he expects me to know what he's talking about.

"So what?" I ask looking at him like he is crazy.

"Will you be playing on Friday?" He questions.

"Of course she will be playing! Actually we both will be starting." Kendra says for the both of us. And the entire time my eyes are on Ashley and when Kendra says that I see a small smile at the corner of her lips. At least I know that she is happy for me even if she doesn't say anything.

"Congrats baby sis!" Glen says picking me up and spinning me around. I wiggle out of his grip and he finally puts me down.

I hit him. "I told you that you can't call me that if we were born at the same time. Although sometimes I question if we are related at all."

"Correction, I was born five minutes earlier, so I have the right to call you baby sis if I want. And you can't deny me Spence, we look alike." He tells me with a smile.

"He's right. You two like alike, a lot actually." Kendra says with a laugh.

"Hey you are supposed to be on my side." I pout at her.

"I am, but I'm just telling the truth." She says holding her hands up like she's defending herself.

"Exactly, even your friend agrees with me." He smiles proudly. "So Kendra you are invited to come celebrating with us tonight, if you want." Glen tells her and suddenly I'm confused. And by the looks on everyone else's faces, they are too.

"What are you talking about Glen?" Aiden asks taking the words right out of my mouth.

"All of you are invited to come over to celebrate these two" He points at me and Kendra "making the starting team. We are just going to drink, and chill, nothing too big." Glen says simply.

"Ok sounds good, I need to shower though." Kendra says.

"I think we all do." I say and everyone laughs. I turn to Kendra. "Here's my address, come by whenever you are ready." I send her a quick text of my address.

"Ok cool, I'll see you later." We say our goodbyes and she leaves. And I suddenly feel awkward.

"I'm really proud of you Spence. I knew you could do it." Glen smiles at me and I hug him. I really do love him.

"Thanks Glen." I say as we break apart

"We should get going though; we have a night of fun ahead of us." Aiden says. "I'll see you two later." He speaks specifically to me and Glen.

He and Ashley turn to leave although Ashley looked as if she wanted to say something. Glen leaves to head to his car and I am still standing in the same spot.

"Ashley!" I yell out to her. She turns around to see me looking at her, and then she turns to Aiden and says something to him.

As she gets closer, I can sense the nervousness in her eyes.

"I'm sorry about this morning." I tell her honestly and she looks at me with a surprised look on her face. "I should not have pushed you. I mean I know it can be hard to come out. I can't even come out to my own parents."

"I get it, you were mad. But that doesn't change anything. I'm still not ready yet." She says.

"I know and I'm not here to try to change that. I just wanted to apologize." I tell her honestly.

"Thanks. And I'm sorry for saying what I did about you. I know you would never do anything intentionally to hurt me or Kendra." She looks directly into my eyes as she tells me this and I can see the sincerity in her eyes. "With that being said, I think it's best if we just you know went our separate ways." And now it feels like I'm going to be sick. Why do we need to go our separate ways? "After our argument I went to the little playground by the tree and I just sat there thinking. You want something that I can't give you right now, and I can't be around you without wanting something more from you." I go to say something but she speaks again. "Before you say anything, I think this is what's best for both of us." How the hell is she going to tell me what's best for me?

"How do you know what's best for me?" I voice my thoughts, more like scream them.

"I just…please don't make this harder than it has to be." She says like she's pleading with me.

I let out a deep breath. I really can't believe this is happening. I was hoping that we could still at least be friends. After spending the day without seeing Ashley at all, I realized how much I missed her. And now she doesn't want to have anything to do with me.

"If that's what you want, then there's nothing I can do about it." I leave before anymore words can be said. I don't even look back to see if she left or not, I just leave.

When I get to my house fifteen minutes later, I only see Glen's car out front. It's not surprising that my parents are working late, yet again. I text Chelsea and tell her to come over and to bring Carmen along with her. I can't have a celebration without my best friend. Of course she questioned it, but I decided not to answer.

I hear the shower going once I open the front door. I rush upstairs, go to my bathroom and take a shower myself. I'm really not looking forward to having people over tonight. All I want to do is lay in bed with some ice cream. Depressing, I know, but I'm hurting.

After getting dressed, I walk down the stairs and notice that Kendra and Aiden are here. I wonder if Ashley is here too.

"Hey Kendra, Aiden." I say to them and I receive a hi and hey in return. They seem to be in a discussion about the football game from last night.

I make my way into the kitchen and I find Glen on the phone.

"Two sausage and bacon and one cheese." I guess we are having pizza for dinner tonight.

I get a drink and wait for him to get off the phone. Finally after a few minutes he hangs up.

"Have you heard from mom and dad?" I ask him.

He shakes his head. "No, they just left money for dinner."

"Oh" Is my simple reply. "Did Ashley come? I didn't see her out there with Aiden."

"No Aiden said that she wasn't feeling well." He says and goes into the living room. I follow him and I see Chelsea and Carmen now sitting next to Aiden and Kendra.

"Hey Chelsea, hi Carmen." I say to them when I get closer.

Chelsea jumped up and hugged me. "I'm so happy for you!" She yells in my ear. I guess someone told her the good news already. "I'm going to be at every game cheering you on." I love my best friend.

"Thank you Chels. I'm looking forward to it." I smile at her. "And I hope to see you there too, Carmen." I tell her seriously.

"Unfortunately, I will be there. This one is making me go." She points at Chelsea and I laugh.

For the rest of the night, we tell jokes, we laugh, we talk, and we just have a good time. The night could have been a million times better if Ashley had been there.

When I went to sleep that night, I only had one thing on my mind: If this is what's best for both of us, then why does it hurt so much?

**A/N: Ok so I know this chapter is not great. I know that some of you will not like what I have done, but you will love what I have planned for future chapters. As always review, so that I know what you think. **


	21. Chapter 21

**This chapter is dedicated to Lil Jig lol. Thanks for letting me use your name. I hope all of you like this chapter.**

**Tuesday**

_Sometimes it's hard to follow your heart.  
>Tears don't mean you're losing, everybody's bruising,<br>_

I'm sitting in the quad listening to a bunch of depressing songs. I know I'm being dramatic because it's not like we were even together and in love, but it still hurts. I had, no, I have strong feelings for Ashley and the fact that she doesn't want anything to do with me is killing me. Well I know she wants to be with me, she just can't right now and it sucks.

I miss talking to LAbabe4u every day after school. I miss just talking to Ashley with ease. Ever since we found out that we were our internet buddies things just went downhill.

_Just be true to who you are_

I wish Ashley wasn't so afraid to come out, but I understand why. It's hard to tell someone that you are different because once you do everything will change. People will start staring at you, whispering behind your back, making up rumors, and the list goes on and on.

I feel a tap on my shoulder and I see Chelsea smiling at me. I take my headphones out as she takes a seat next to me.

"Hey what's up?" She asks in a concerned voice. I was never good at hiding my feelings.

"Nothing, I'm fine." I tell her and lay my head down on my arm.

"Spencer" She says in that 'tell me now' tone. I don't say anything. "Does this have anything to do with why Ashley wasn't at the get together last night?" And this is why I love Chelsea; she knows what I'm thinking without me even saying anything.

I let out a deep breath and lift my head up. "She told me that we should go our separate ways because she wants to be more than just friends but she can't give that to me right now."

"Maybe this is a good thing." She says and I look her like she's crazy. She is supposed to be on my side.

"How is this a good thing Chels?" I nearly yell.

"Maybe you both need time a part to figure out what you want."

"I know what I want, and that's Ashley." I tell her like it's the most obvious thing in the world, well because it is.

"I know that, Spence. But I meant figure out if you are ready to come out. I mean when Carmen and I go out holding hands or kissing in public, people stare and sometimes they will say something. Are you sure you are ready for that? Is that what you really want?" Chelsea tells me seriously.

I never thought about that. People are so cruel and spiteful. Why do they care if people want to express their love? Just because it's not something they are used to, they want to get angry. Well fuck them and their small minds.

"You're right. I just can't help my feelings for her. She is all that I think about Chels." I say sadly.

"I know but when it does come for you and Ashley to be together then you will appreciate it a lot more." Chelsea smiles at me.

I hope she's right because right now I'm hating all of this that's going on.

"I guess you are right." I smile at her. "Where's Carmen, aren't you two like attached at the hip or something?" I laugh and she slaps me on my arm while she laughs with me.

"We are not attached at the hip." I scoff and she rolls her eyes. "Anyways, she had a doctor's appointment so she will be late."

"I wouldn't even come if that's the case."

"That's what she said, but I'm making her come." She says and shrugs her shoulders.

"Gosh she's so whipped." I laugh.

"Hell yea she's whipped." Chelsea says with a small smile on her face.

A few minutes later the bell for first period rang, and I made my way to class. I was not looking forward to seeing Ashley. I never thought I would think something like that.

When I do walk in the class, Ashley is sitting in the back. She looks up as soon as I walk in even though I didn't even make a sound. I wonder if she has a Spencer sense. Doubt it. As soon as she catches my eyes, she looks away.

I do my best not to look her way as I take my seat on the other side of the classroom.

Throughout the class, I try my hardest not to stare, but it's hard. Ashley looks gorgeous today. Her hair is straightened and her red bangs are flowing in front of her face. She looks simply beautiful. Not looking at her is going to be hard.

I focus all of my attention on the teacher lecturing, but throughout the class I can feel her eyes on me. And I think of the time she didn't talk to me for an entire week. God this is hard.

Finally, the class is over and this time I rush out before everyone else.

I actually pay attention in my other classes, barely. Fourth period was almost exactly like first. I felt Ashley's eyes on me and I avoided it at all costs.

When lunch finally came around, I went straight to my usual table. I am soon joined by Kendra, Carmen, and Chelsea.

Lunch goes on as normal, I eat my food, talk to everyone at the table, and glance at Ashley's table every so often.

I guess this is just how it has to be from now on.

I go through my next classes with ease. When it's time for practice, I rush to the gym and change my clothes. I'm glad I have basketball to take my mind off of everything.

For practice we played against the subs. It was nice being on the same team as Jessica and not having to block her. I am happy being bruise free because this time I don't have Ashley to make it feel better.

After practice, I was feeling a little better. I went home, did homework and relaxed. I was tempted to log on to the chat website just to see if Ashley was on, but if she was what would I do? Nothing. I would be too scared to do anything.

Right before I went to sleep, I wrote a poem. Writing has really been a great outlet for my feelings. It's like I'm getting all of my feelings off of my chest without having to talk to anyone and feeling ashamed about how I am feeling. I don't have to be afraid to be who I am.

**Wednesday**

It's a new day and I am not going to feel sorry for myself anymore.

_Should I give up or should I just keep chasing pavements  
>Even if it leads nowhere?<em>

Adele took the words right out of my mouth. I almost feel like wanting to be with Ashley is a lost cause. I turn the song up on the radio and continue driving to school.

_Or would it be a waste even if I knew my place  
>Should I leave it there?<em>

I mean what if I did what to be with Ashley without anyone knowing, what will happen when someone finds out. Would she just pretend like we were never anything? Like I forced myself on her?

I don't even want to think about this anymore.

When I get to school today, I find Kendra already sitting at my normal table.

"Hey" I say and she jumps. I laugh and she pouts.

"That's not funny. Why are you sneaking up on people like that?"

"I wasn't sneaking up on you. All I did was tap you on your shoulder and you jumped like ten feet in the air. Why are you so paranoid?" I laugh at her again and take a seat next to her.

"Whatever, I'm not paranoid." I roll my eyes at her. "So can I ask you something?" She asks hesitantly.

"Sure go ahead."

"What's going on between you and Ashley?" Of all questions she asks one about Ashley. I was trying not to think of me and Ashley anymore.

"Nothing." I reply almost too quickly.

"Spencer." What is up with people reading me lately?

"What? There is absolutely nothing going on between us!" I almost yell because I am sick of thinking about this fucked up situation that we are in.

"Ok well I was wondering because I remember you telling me that you liked her and I thought that's why you ended everything with me." She says softly.

I sigh. "The reason I ended things with you was because I knew that there wasn't that spark between us. When we kissed, it was just a kiss. It wasn't special, but when I kissed Ashley, everything just felt right kind of like it was meant to happen." I tell her honestly with a smile on my face just thinking about the kiss.

"If you feel that way, then why isn't there something going between you two?" She asks looking at me disbelievingly.

"I don't want to be a secret to her. I don't want the same thing that happened with you to happen with me. And she can't give me that." I tell her while trying to keep my voice as even as possible.

"Is it worth it?" She questions and I give her a confused look forcing her to explain. "You don't want to be with her in secret which I understand completely. But now you aren't even talking to her. I can tell by the way that you talk about her, that you are a few steps away from being head over hills for her. So I ask again, is it worth it to not be with her?" Kendra looks at me dead in my eyes the entire time.

I open my mouth to say something, but nothing comes out. Is it worth it? I obviously want to be with Ashley. She is consuming all of my thoughts. It's like every minute of every day I am thinking of her for some reason.

"You don't have to answer me now but I think you should think about it." She then gets up and starts walking away. I then notice that everyone else is walking in classes. I guess the bell rang.

I grab my bag and make my way to my class. Is it worth it?

Ashley comes in the class a few minutes late. She talks to the teacher and then takes her normal seat…away from me. Is it worth it?

This time I didn't feel her stares. I guess she decided to pay attention today. I don't even know why she was staring in the first place. Whatever, I'm done over thinking all of this.

After this class, I drag myself to second period. I put all my attention into learning about the different functions of the organelles in cells. Fun shit I tell you. I hope you caught the sarcasm in that.

On my way to third period, Ashley almost bumped into me. She wasn't paying attention to where she was going because she was too into the conversation she was having with some girl she was walking with. They were laughing about whatever the hell is so funny and when they turned the corner, she almost ran right into me.

She looked at me and her smile fell. The girl she was with looked between us obviously confused. After a minute, Ashley mumbled an apology and pulled the girl along.

And of course I couldn't focus on anything besides that minor encounter for the entirety of my third class. And then when I got to fourth period she was late yet again. She was probably spending time with her new girlfriend. I know, I am probably over reacting but I have the right to be a little jealous.

This time I stared at her. I was trying to figure her out. Who was that girl that she was with? Did she really move on that fast? Did I even mean anything to her?

I shake my thoughts away. I'm pretty sure that they were just friends…right?

"Ok class you all have a project that is due on Monday. You will be put in pairs." Everyone starts looking around the classroom and nodding at their friends. "I have already chosen the groups so you can save your time trying to find one. And no, I will not change them and you cannot trade, so do not bother asking." With the week I'm having, I probably got paired with Ashley. "As you leave the class I will hand you the paper that has your partner's name and e-mail address along with the project's assignment."

Just fucking great. I spent the rest of the class deciding what would happen if I had to work on this assignment with Ashley. I figured it could go either one of two ways. One instance would be if we just work with each other to finish the project and didn't talk about anything that didn't have to do with project. The other way would be if we tried to work on the project but couldn't work with the tension that's between us and we end up arguing about our fucked up situation.

I think that option number two is how it will be, if we are even paired together.

The bell ringing broke me out of my thoughts. I guess I find out now if my life really sucks or if things will start looking up. When I get to the front of the class, the teacher smiles at me then looks through her stack of papers and pulls one out. After she hands it to me, I leave the classroom before looking at it. I am kind of nervous to see what it says.

I take a deep breath and just turn it over. And of course my life sucks. Out of twenty three other people, I was stuck with Ashley. This is just my fucking luck.

I get to my lunch table and plop down. Everyone else is already there, so when I do this they all look at me with concerned eyes.

Before they could even say or ask anything, I put the paper on the table. Once they each had a chance to read it, no one said anything.

"There's no way to change this?" Carmen finally says. I just shake my head no.

"Maybe it won't be that bad. All you have to do is complete the project then go on acting like she doesn't exist." Kendra says. Chelsea and Carmen nod along with her.

"I hope it will be that easy. But seriously of all the people in the class, I was partnered with Ashley." I pout.

"There's nothing you can do about it now. Just try to get through it quickly and easily." Chelsea replies with a shrug.

I began to eat my lunch and I fall into a conversation with the rest of the table. Halfway through lunch, I lose my appetite though. I wanted to throw up as soon as I saw Ashley and the same girl from earlier, who will now be known as skank, walking towards the cheerleading table. What made me lose my appetite was the fact that they both seemed to be fixing their clothes as they hurried to the table. Anyone want to guess what they were just doing?

"Who's the hottie?" Kendra says and everyone looks at Ashley and skank as they take their seats at the table.

"Skank" I mumble but I doubt anyone heard.

"I don't know but she is cute." Chelsea says and everyone else seems to agree.

"I wonder if she's single." Kendra says still staring at her.

"Nope, she's fucking Ashley." I mumble again.

"What?" Kendra asks looking at me. I did not know anyone could hear me.

"I said how do you know if she even likes girls?" This is far from what I said.

She shrugs. "She might be and that's all that matters."

For the rest of lunch they were talking about if skank was gay or not and I knew the answer to that already.

When we got to Lit, Chelsea was trying to tell me that being paired with Ashley might even be a good thing. I just looked at her giving her the 'who are you kidding' look. She dropped the subject and went back to her reading.

I was once again really excited to get to practice. We were getting closer and closer to game day and I was more than ready. I would be lying if I said that I wasn't nervous.

During practice we mainly ran the track and practiced free throws. It was nothing too hard, but I just wanted to play.

After practice, I decided not to take a shower at school opting to use my nice bathroom at home.

"Would you be mad if I started to hang out with Ashley again?" Kendra blurts out as we start walking towards the parking lot. I stop and turn to look at her. "Not like before because I understand your feelings for her. I mean just hang out as friends." She adds hurriedly.

"You can do whatever you like. I don't know why you are asking me, I don't control what you do." I say and continue walking.

"That's true. But I know what's going on between you two and what kind of friend would I be if I started sleeping with her again? And she hurt me so I can't put myself in that position again." She tells me.

"Thank you for thinking of me, but really it's fine. I don't care." I say and as we are about to separate to go to our cars, I add "Just be careful."

She nods. "I will." She gives me a small smile. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Bye Kendra." I turn and leave to my car.

I walk down the row of cars and as I get to mine, I see Ashley and skank standing next to my car. Why is she here?

"Um hi?" I say when I get there. I had to say something first because they seem to be in this deep conversation.

Ashley turns her head at the sound of my voice. When she sees me her eyes travel from my legs up to my eyes. When she saw me looking at her, she blushed. As cute as it is, I keep my straight face.

"Oh hi." Ashley says.

"Hi, I'm Ivy." Skank says extending her hand. Holy southern accent, I definitely was not expecting that one. It does kind of add to her appeal.

I shake her hand out of politeness. "Spencer." I reply.

"Oh I know who you are." She says with a big smile. And I give her a confused look and turn to Ashley with the same look on my face.

"I guess you are wondering why we are here, right?" I nod and she continues. "Well obviously you know that we have this assignment that we have to do together." I nod again. "I know that you would probably like to start today but I've already made plans with Ivy today. We can get started tomorrow if you like though." Ashley finishes.

I really feel like screaming and throwing a fit because she is pretty much telling me that she's about to go fuck this girl. I decide against that because well I'm not a child and we aren't together.

"Uh ok, why couldn't you just text me that? I mean you didn't have to wait out here for me." I tell her.

"I would have but I forgot my phone at home and I saw you walking out of the gym with Kendra so I decided to wait and talk to you now."

"Oh right. Well thanks for waiting. I guess I'll see you tomorrow then." I walk to my door and unlock my car.

"It was nice meeting you Spencer." Ska- Ivy says with that southern accent again. I look at her, and I mean actually look at her this time. She has long brown hair and dark blue eyes. She could use a tan but that's just my opinion. Other than that I guess I can see what Ashley likes about her, she is really pretty.

"You too." I reply dryly and get into my car.

For the entire ride to my house, I think about Ashley and Ivy. I hate that I do but I can't help it. Does Ashley really care so little about how I feel that she has to throw it in my face? Maybe they are just hanging out and not doing what I think they are.

When I get home, I take a quick shower and decide to stay in my room for the rest of the night after eating dinner. The entire time I kept wondering what was going to happen when I met with Ashley tomorrow.

With everything on my mind, I decide to go to sleep early that night. Right when I turn out the lights and get comfortable in my bed, my phone goes off.

I groan and look at it.

_Sorry if you are sleeping I know that it's late, but I was wondering what time you wanted to meet up tomorrow._

Why so you can plan around your fucking time? Ugh I need to stop thinking like this.

_How about five?_

I wait and she replies a few seconds later.

_Sounds good. Do you want to come to my place?_

_Yea that's fine. Send me the address._

A few seconds later she sends me the address and we say an awkward goodbye.

I finally went to sleep that night after thinking for a while about what will happen tomorrow. I will be alone with Ashley for a few hours at least, and I still have that question on my mind: Is it really worth it?

**A/N: Thanks for reading. I was going to make this and the next chapter into one but I decided to split them into two chapters and the next chapter will be up soon. I know not much happened here but there will be more in the next chapter. Please let me know what you think!**

**Lyrics are from:**

**Jessie J- Who You Are**

**Adele- Chasing Pavements**


	22. Chapter 22

**Here's a long chapter with lots of Spashley! I hope you like! Some of you might be disappointed because you wanted certain things to happen, but what I wrote just felt right. **

**Thursday**

I got out of bed a little late today because I am kind of dreading working with Ashley. I just don't know what to expect.

After I get ready for school, I go downstairs and actually eat breakfast here. I make myself a bowl of cereal and slowly eat.

"Why are you still here?" I hear Glen say as he walks into the kitchen still wiping his eyes.

"I woke up late." I mumble. He nods in acknowledgement to what I said. I finish my cereal and leave the house. When I get to my car, I turn the radio on and turn it up loud so I can try to drown out my thoughts.

_Place my wants and needs  
>Over your resistance<em>

As selfish as it is of me, I really wish Ashley didn't have this fear. I wish that we could just be together. I want to know what's stopping her from coming out. I mean Kendra's out and yea people may look at her differently but those are the ignorant assholes that for some reason have a problem with her being gay. It's something more to it than that with Ashley and I have to figure out why if I ever want to be with her.

_No one can do ya  
>The way that I do<em>

We have something that could be great. Something that is strong. I've been with guys and Kendra and no one has made me feel the way that she does.

And she told me herself that she normally doesn't catch feelings for people but for some reason she did for me twice, technically. That has to mean something to her. At least I hope it does.

Gosh Rihanna you are only making me think more. I turn the radio off and finish my drive to school. When I get there, there are a lot of people already there so I have to park further than what I am used to.

When I get to my school from the parking lot the bell rings.

My first period went as normal. A hot looking Ashley was there, on time this time, and we stared at each from across the room, only when the other wasn't looking though.

Nothing interesting happened in the rest of my classes. Fourth period was just like first with Ashley and I.

I don't think I can handle not being with her for much longer. I hope something changes soon. I was hoping these feelings I had would go away and I could move on, but I am not so lucky. My feelings are still here and I think they are staying.

When I got to lunch, we somehow got on the topic of the hottie again.

"Oh her name is Ivy, so you can stop referring to her as the hottie." I tell them.

"Is someone jealous?" Carmen asks probably catching the tone in my voice when I said Ivy.

"No why would I be?"

"Maybe because she is always with Ashley which is where you want to be." Chelsea says with a knowing look.

"I have no idea what you two are talking about." I tell them, and I hope they believe the lies that are slipping throw my lips.

"That's bullshit and you know it." Kendra says and I slap her arm. "Ow, just because I'm telling the truth doesn't mean you have to hit me."

"Whatever. I'm done dwelling on the Ashley situation so can we please drop it." More lies. They probably caught on to the annoyance in my voice, so they changed the subject.

"Hey is everything ok?" Chelsea asks once we get to our Lit class. "I mean with the whole Ashley thing."

"Not really but I can't do anything about it." I whisper back because the teacher started class.

"I think you need to talk to her and tell her how you feel. Tell her how it makes you feel to see her everyday but you can't be with her. Tell her how it makes you feel when she laughs or smiles but you are the one that's making her do those things." She smiles at me and I give her a small smile back. "I just want you to be happy and I see the way you look at her. I just think you should talk to her."

"I will have plenty of time to talk to her after school. We are working on our project today."

"Perfect." Chelsea smiles big but then it changes. "Don't back out of it." I go to reply but she cuts me off. "I know how you get."

"Fine, I'll try." I hope I can do it. I just don't want to push Ashley. She is the one that said that she needed space from me.

During practice we played a full game without stopping. Coach called our fouls and told us what we needed to be careful of, so we had to stop every few minutes making practice take longer.

I loved being on the court and actually playing. I think we are going to do well tomorrow, our team is looking good.

Practice ran longer than normal and I didn't get out until five. I was honestly too tired to take a shower here, but I didn't want to show up at Ashley's all smelly. I decided to call Ashley to let her know that I was going to be a little later than normal.

"_Hello?" _Gosh her voice is just so sexy. She can just talk to me and I would get instantly turned on. I wonder what would happen if sh-_ "Uh hello?" _Oh shit, Ashley!

"_Oh um sorry. I know I'm supposed to be there, but practice went longer than I thought it would. I am just going to take a shower and I'll be over there soon." _I rush out.

"_Oh yea no problem. You can shower over here if you want to. I mean I can understand if you don't want to because that can be a little weird. But I know the showers at school aren't the best and I have a nice clea-"_

"_Ashley!" _I stop her rambling even though it is really cute._ "I'll be there soon."_

"_Oh sorry, yea I'll see you soon."_

Should I take a shower here or risk being naked in front of Ashley? Whatever, I'll just use her clean shower.

"Hey Kendra, I'm leaving. I'll see you tomorrow." I tell her as I leave the locker room.

"I thought you were going to Ashley's house today." She says as she follows me.

"I am. She said I could just shower at her house." I reply like showering at Ashley's is something that I do every day.

"Oh. Wait is that a good idea? You know with the whole not being with each other thing. If you were at my house taking a shower and I just happened to see you naked, do you know what I would want to do to you?" She tells me with a big grin on her face and a faraway look in her eyes as if she is picturing it. "On second thought maybe it is a good idea for her to see you naked, something can finally happen."

"Yea well unfortunately I think Ashley has more self-control than you." I say seriously.

"That's because she hasn't seen you naked yet." Kendra says with a smirk.

I laugh and say "Right well we will see how it goes. I'll tell you about it tomorrow."

"I'm expecting a great story." She stops at her car and opens the door. "Oh and see if you can find out more information on Ivy for me."

Oh right, I almost forgot about her.

"Yea I will try. I don't think we will be talking about anything other than the project though." Unless I get the courage to tell her how I feel.

"Ok have fun and good luck."

"Thanks."

I got in my car and put on the GPS in my phone. I had already stored Ashley's address in this morning. I decided to drive in silence so that I won't have any songs influencing my thoughts. I need to have a clear head when I get to Ashley's house.

When I finally get there my mouth hits my lap. This is a fucking mansion. It looks like my house can fit inside of here like five times. I pull up to the gate and I had to get buzzed in.

I park in the garage next to a nice looking sports car which I'm assuming is Ashley's because she told me that she is the only one ever home. I take my bag with my clothes and walk up to the front door to ring the bell.

I fix my clothes and try to make myself look as good as I can in basketball shorts and a t-shirt.

"Hey" I jump and look up because I didn't even notice that Ashley opened the door. I double take at her because her shorts are about an inch away from being considered underwear and her tank top shows a few inches of her tan stomach. When I get to her eyes I notice that she is looking at me just like I was looking at her. Who knew someone would think I looked good in my practice clothes. "Come in." She opens the door wider and steps aside.

I adjust my shoulder strap of my bag and walk in. "Sorry I'm late." I say again and look around. The inside of this house is just as amazing as the outside. It is huge and everything looks so fancy, I can't imagine being here alone all of the time. I remember Ashley telling me that her dad is always working at his record label and her mom is always on vacation. Vacation from what, I don't know. I feel bad that she has to stay here all alone.

"It's ok. I had enough time to finish up some other homework." She smiles at me like she's trying to put me at ease. "Come on, I'll show you a bathroom where you can shower."

We walked up the stairs and I felt like I was on the episode of Cribs when everything you see was better than the last.

After walking past a few doors, we finally stopped and she opened a door.

"Ok so there's everything you need in here. When you are done, I will be in my room which is a few doors down; you will know which one it is." She laughs a little. "Are you all good?" She looks at me dead in my eyes with a deep stare. I can barely force myself to look away but I do.

"Yea I'll be good thanks." I step inside the bathroom and she leaves.

After a nice shower, I walked down the hall and tried to find her room. I easily find it because of the 'Princess Ashley' sign on the door. I laughed and made my way in the room.

Her room was painted purple and she had a huge queen sized bed which she was lying on top of.

"Hey Princess Ashley" I joke.

"Don't make fun of me because you are jealous that you don't have one." She sits up on her bed and smiles at me.

"Oh you caught me. Do you know how hard it is to find a sign that says Princess Spencer?" I laugh and sit on her bed.

"You should blame your parents for that one. I think you are the only girl in the world with the name Spencer."

"And that's why I like it. It's different and unique."

"It fits you perfectly then." I blush and look down. She clears her throat. "So we should get started on this assignment."

"Uh yea. We need to research Multiple Personality Disorder and then find a video to show the class how someone with Multiple Personality Disorder acts. Then we need to put all of our research into some sort of media to present to the class." I ramble out like the true nerd that I am. I look up at her and she is staring at me. "What?"

She shakes her head. "Nothing it's just really cute when you get all into your school work." I give her a confused look. "I don't know why but I like it." She shrugs. "But yea let's get started."

Throughout the entire time we were working on our project, it wasn't awkward like I thought it would be. Sometimes we would stare at each after one of us made the other laugh, or after one of us gave the other a compliment and we blushed. I love that we can easily spend time together without anything affecting us.

"Look Spencer, I'm sorry." Ashley says suddenly.

"What are you sorry for?" I give her a questioning look.

"For putting us in this fucked up situation, and then flirting with you today. It's not fair I know, but I just can't help myself when I'm around you. In class the only thing I can do is stare from far because if I sit anywhere near you I would be too tempted to talk to you and tell you how cute you look when you are really concentrating on whatever it is the teacher is talking about." She tells me and I just smile.

Everything she just told me was absolutely beautiful. I had no idea she felt that way in class. I don't know what I would do if I did know. Now that I do know, what should I do? I mean she still hasn't said anything about coming out or even being with me, but what else am I supposed to think of this information?

I guess I need to do what Chelsea said and just talk to her.

"If you don't want to answer this then you don't have to, but why is it so hard for you to come out? I feel like it's something more than just social rejection." I tell her seriously.

There is a long silence in the room. She looks like she is having an internal debate with herself. I guess it must be really hard for her to open up to me.

Just as she is about to say something to me, I hear a buzzing sound. She hops up out of her bed and goes to an intercom box near her door. She pushes a button and video shows up, then she pushes another button and the video is gone again. It seemed to be a video of the front gate; I guess she's the one that buzzed me in.

"I should get going now. I have more homework and my parents are probably worried." I say because she has other company coming over. "We can uh finish putting everything together over the weekend seeing as we will both be busy tomorrow." I say as I grab my bag and head towards the door. I find the stairs and practically run down them.

"You know you don't have to go. We are almost done really." Ashley says as she follows me.

I open the door and I see none other than Ivy standing there in shorts and tank top.

I turn back to Ashley. "I really should go. It looks like your busy anyway." I step around Ivy without saying anything to her and make my way to my car.

"Just go set up and I will be right there." I hear Ashley tell skank. I will no longer try to be nice to her because it's pretty obvious what she is here for.

I continue my way to my car.

"Wait Spencer!" Ashley calls from behind me. I stop and she jogs to catch up to me. "What's wrong? Why are you upset?"

"I'm fine. I have to go." I get into my car and drive off without giving her a chance to respond.

I nearly cry on my way home but tough it out and hold back the tears. When I get home, my parents are sleeping so they were not worried after all.

After reading for some of my classes, I went to bed. My phone vibrated as soon as I closed my eyes.

_I meant everything I said today, I am really sorry. I don't want to hurt you._

Well I guess it's too late for that one. I close the text and decide not to respond. The only thoughts I need to keep in my head are ones about my first game tomorrow.

**Friday**

_There you go pulling me right back in,  
>Right back in<em>

I sing and dance along to the song while I'm taking my shower. I had lovely dream about Ashley last night; so much for just thinking about basketball. I think that if I would not have gotten paired up with Ashley in the first place, I would not remember how good it felt to be around her. I would not remember how easy our conversations are when we talk.

_I'm stuck on you  
>Whutooo whutooo<br>Stuck like glue  
>You and me baby we're stuck like glue<em>

Just like the song says, I'm stuck. No matter how hard I try, I can't escape my feelings for her. And from what Ashley told me yesterday, I think she is too. I just wish everything was easier.

I dance to the rest of the song and pretty much yell at the top of my lungs. After my shower, I get dress, grab a pop tart and leave for school.

When I get to school, I see Ashley sitting at my normal table this time. I don't know if I should stop or if I should just walk past her like I don't see her.

I decide to go to the table because she is there for a reason. When I get closer, I notice that she is wearing her cheerleading uniform and wow she looks hot in it. I shake those thoughts from my head because this is not the time to be having those thoughts.

"Hi." I say and sit next to her. She looks surprised that I'm talking to her. I would be too if she did what I did yesterday.

"I wanted to see if you were ok. You practically ran out of my house yesterday and you didn't text me back last night."

"I know, I just…" I pause and figure out how to explain myself. I should ease into what I really want to say. "Are you sleeping with Ivy?" Or maybe I should just come right out and say it. I swear sometimes I don't have a filter from brain to my mouth.

"Is that what this is about?" She asks with a small smile on her face. I really don't get why she's smiling.

"Well yea, it seems like you two are really close and then I saw you fixing your clothes yesterday when you got to lunch, not that I am a stalker or anything. And then I really thought so when she came to your house yesterday with very little clothing." I explain and then she starts laughing.

She slows her laughter down and then replies. "We aren't sleeping together Spencer." Thank God! "Ivy just moved here from Mississippi and she joined the cheerleading squad. As captain, it was my responsibility to make sure that she was ready for the game today. We were practicing any chance we got. That's all it was Spencer, I promise." Ashley finishes.

I groan and put my head on the table. "Gosh I'm so embarrassed." She chuckles. "I feel like a self-conscious jealous girlfriend." I freeze at my own words. Where is that brain to mouth filter? "I mean not that I am your girlfriend or anything I was just…yea I'm going to shut up now." This is bad.

"You're cute, you know that?" She tells me and puts her hand on my back which relaxes me. "And for the record, if was in your position I probably would have jumped to the same conclusions." She laughs.

"We should get to class; the bell rang like two minutes ago." I say standing up.

"You are such a good girl Spencer. I really like that about you." She laughs and I shake my head and start walking to class and she is right next to me.

Halfway through the class, I feel my phone vibrate. I look up at my teacher and she seems to be passed out on her desk. I take out my phone and smile when I see what it is.

**LAbabe4u:** I'm really happy that we were forced to be partners

**SLC823:** To be honest, I was worried about it

**LAbabe4u:** Me too, but it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought.

**SLC823:** Yea I thought we would end up fighting and not get anything done.

**LAbabe4u:** Fighting? You are too sweet to be a fighter

**SLC823:** What that's just my cover. I'm tough.

**LAbabe4u:** Right I would like to see you try to be tough.

**SLC823:** Get on my bad side and you will see.

**LAbabe4u:** On second thought, I don't think I want to suffer the wrath of Oprah.

I laugh a little too loudly because everyone in the class including Ashley and the teacher looks at me. I burry my head in my book and pretend to be doing work.

**LAbabe4u:** Stop disrupting class, I'm trying to learn here!

**SLC823:** I hate you so much right now!

This is how my first few classes went, Ashley and I IM'ing each other throughout the entire class. I had a few more outbursts, but I couldn't help it, Ashley kept making me laugh.

"You seem happier today." Chelsea says as I take my seat at our table for lunch.

"I am." I say with a grin. I look up and notice Ashley walking with Ivy to their table, both looking really hot in their uniforms. Ashley looks over at my table and smiles at me when she catches my eye.

"So I'm going to assume that by the smiles you and Ashley are giving each other, something big has happened." Carmen says. I blush because I didn't think anyone saw that.

"Kind of. We still haven't cleared the air on us yet, but we've been talking again." I say with another smile.

"That's good. I'm guessing you took my advice and talked to her." Chelsea says confidently.

"A little. We still have a lot to talk about though if we want to move on past the friends phase. But just talking to her now is better than nothing." I tell them happily.

"I'm glad that you are happy." Kendra says.

**LAbabe4u:** I really wish I was sitting over there with you.

**SLC823:** Me too. It's not the same without you.

I know I really need to talk to Ashley because right now it feels like we are more than friends. It's weird how we can go from practically being strangers to talking nonstop in less twenty four hours. It's just how we are and I don't want to question it.

After lunch, I went to class with Chelsea and we actually had to do a class discussion, so I couldn't talk to Ashley. Yea I know I'm upset about that too.

At practice, well we didn't practice. We stretched and did some exercises. Coach said she didn't want to tire us out before the big game and I wasn't going to argue with that because I am usually exhausted after practice.

We ate a snack about two hours before game time, and then we had time to relax for about an hour before the game actually started. I went to the bleaches and took out my phone.

**SLC823:** I think I am going to play a lot better now that I know I will have my own personal cheerleader.

**LAbabe4u:** Oh yea Ivy did say that she thought you were cute.

**SLC823:** Nice! Did you put in a good word for me?

**LAbabe4u:** Definitely! What kind of friend would I be if I didn't?

**SLC823:** The kind that wants me all to herself!

**LAbabe4u:** Oh dang, you caught me, but Ivy did say that you were cute.

**SLC823:** Tell her I said thanks. How did she know who I was anyway?

**LAbabe4u:** After we almost ran into you she saw how we were looking at each other and asked me about it. I was hesitant to tell her but then she told me that she was gay too so she was cool with it so I told her about you.

**SLC823:** Oh so you will no longer be the lone gay cheerleader anymore then, right?

**LAbabe4u**: Lol yea. And she's really cool you should meet her again, now that you don't hate her.

**SLC823**: Oh you noticed that?

**LAbabe4u**: Of course I did, I notice a lot of things about you.

**SLC823**: Aww that's sweet. And I guess I will try to be nice to her now. Is she single?

**LAbabe4u:** I thought we've already established that I want you for myself.

**SLC823:** Not for me. But I know someone that's interested.

**LAbabe4u:** And this person would be?

**SLC823:** Kendra.

"Hey Spence!" Speaking of Kendra, I look up and she is by the locker room door. "We need to change and get ready to play." An hour went by that fast?

"Ok I'm coming." I say.

**LAbabe4u:** She is single. We should play matchmakers!

Aww she is so cute when she's excited.

**SLC823:** Sounds good. I have to go get ready. I'll see you soon Gayle.

**LAbabe4u:** Good luck, Oprah. I'll be there cheering you on.

I went to the locker room and everyone was there changing. I went to my locker and started changing as well.

I can't believe that I will be playing in less than thirty minutes. I am really nervous, yet excited.

"Ok girls, this is our first game of the season. We have been working our butts off for this and I have a lot of faith in all of you. Now let's go show this other team what King High is all about!" Coach says as we are about to leave the locker room. After her speech we yell some sort of cheer and run out to the court.

When I get there I see the cheerleaders already cheering the crowd on. I catch Ashley's eyes and she winks at me. I swear I almost fell. We make our way to our seats and wait for the announcer to call the starting players.

I look in the crowd as I wait. I see my dad sitting next to my mom who is holding a video camera. Oh gosh, how embarrassing? I look over and see Glen and Aiden in some deep conversation. I'm happy that they are all here supporting me.

The announcer finally announces everyone and we get in our positions for the tip off. They ended up with the ball first. The girl that I am matched with is fast, but I am right there with her.

At the half, we are down 35-27. Coach told us that we had enough time to catch up and win this game.

When we got back to the court, my attention went straight to Ashley for some reason. She was cheering to the crowd, and then turns her head to look at me. 'Go Spencer! You can do it!' She cheers to me. And I really do feel like I have my own personal cheerleader.

By the fourth quarter, I was on fire. It was like nothing was stopping me. I would see and hear Ashley, my parents, or Glen cheering for me and I would just get inspired to play better. I was even fouled a few times so I wouldn't score. I was loving this game.

By the end of the game, we won, 72-68. We cheered in the middle of the court before they made us leave because of the boys' game that's starting soon.

We took showers and most girls left, but I wanted to stay to watch the boys' game and you know, to watch Ashley cheer. I dragged Kendra along so that I wouldn't have to sit near my parents.

"You're lucky I like you." She grumbles as we find a seat on the bleachers that had a clear view of the cheerleaders.

"Oh shut up. You will like me even more after I tell you what I'm about to tell you though." I smile at her.

"Yay good news. Ok tell me!" She says excitedly.

"Ivy, the new cheerleader, is definitely gay." I tell her and her smile gets bigger. "And single." I add.

She sits back in her seat and looks at the cheerleaders as they rest for the next game. My eyes stay on Ashley the entire time.

The game finally starts twenty minutes later. I try to concentrate on the game but Ashley looks too hot for me not to look at her. Her short skirt and the flips she does is such a turn on.

"Woo!" I hear the crowd yell. I hear the announcer say Carlin makes the three.

"Yay Glen!" See no one will ever know that I wasn't paying attention. I am so grateful for announcers.

At halftime, King is up by fifteen points. I sit back and wait for the second half to start. But the cheerleaders make their way to center court and both Kendra and I lean forward in our seats. I completely forgot about the halftime show.

I guess we missed this during our game. And I am kind of glad that we did. All of the flips, kicks, and jumps that they are doing would have made it hard for me to concentrate on the second half. After watching Ashley do all of that I am so turned on that I decide to step outside for the remaining ten minutes of half time.

I go outside the gym and lean against the wall. Not a minute later, I hear the door open.

"Hey" A sweaty Ashley says as she comes forward.

I gulp and reply. "Hi."

"Did you like the show?" She asks with a smirk on her face. I nod because I don't think I can trust myself to say anything right now. "You did amazing when you played. It was very hot."

I gulp again. What is she doing to me? "Thank you. My cheerleader had a lot to do with that." I smirk at her now regaining my confidence. I want her so bad right now, but I won't overstep any boundaries. I know we flirt, but actually acting on it is different. I need to change that. "Are you ever going to tell me why you can't come out? Because Ashley, I really like you and I want to be with you." I know she will probably think that that was very random but there's no more backing out for me. I'm ready to do this now.

She puts her head down and looks away before sighing. "I really want to tell you Spencer, but it's hard for me to talk about." Ashley says and I can tell that she really means it. Something really important to her must be stopping her and I have to respect that.

"Then I'll wait." I say surprising both me and her.

"You'll wait?" I nod and she smiles. "What does that mean?"

"Well it means that whatever it is that's holding you back must mean a lot to you. I don't want to have to choose between having you in my life and not being able to be with you how I want or not having you in my life at all. I can't get over the way you make me feel, Ashley. I've tried, but it's useless because you are always on my mind." I smile at her and she gives me a smile back. I grab her arm and pull her into me. "I want you. I want this…us." I tell her sincerely.

She looks at me as if she is trying to see if I am serious. I guess she found whatever it was she was looking for because a few seconds later her lips were on mine.

And yet again, I am lucky enough to experience an amazingly blissful kiss. I finally have what I wanted.

"I've wanted this for so long, Spencer." She says after she pulls back from the kiss. I smile at her and pull her closer to me and kiss her again.

I am not worried about anything else right now, because I am too happy to care.

**A/N: Am I forgiven for the lack of Spashleyness in the past few chapters? I hope so. If not, I'm sorry I guess. Let me know what you think. Love it? Hate it? **

**Lyrics from:**

**Cockiness- Rihanna**

**Stuck Like Glue- Sugarland**

**Oh and check out these amazing stories, if you haven't already:**

**Remember Me by Sgarc12**

**Saving Me by HollyMarie4**

**Teacher's Pet by Sparkles04**

**You won't regret it!**


	23. Chapter 23

**This chapter is dedicated to Loopy and Drunky. **

**And a special Happy Birthday and dedication to CraddleYourExistence!**

"I can't believe this is really happening." I say as I pull back and lean my forehead on hers.

"I know me either. I feel like this is all a dream and I'm going to wake up feeling disappointed because none of it really happened." Ashley says and gives me a soft peck on my lips.

"This whole day has felt like that for me." I smile at her and she kisses me again. I don't think I could ever get enough of her kisses. She pushes herself more onto me and I fall back in the wall. It looks like she is enjoying this as much as I am. The second I feel her tongue on mine, I moan into the kiss. Wrapping my arms tighter around her waist, I pull her into me.

We break apart when we hear someone clearing their throat. We jump apart and fix our clothes. I'm just hoping that it is not one of my parents or Madison. We look up to see Ivy standing right outside the gym doors. I guess we didn't hear them open.

"Sorry to interrupt, but half time is almost over." She says apologetically. I feel really bad for judging her before I even got to know her.

"Thanks Ivy, I'll be right in." Ashley says with a smile. Ivy turns back into the gym without another word. Ashley turns back to me and says "We should be more careful."

"I know but at that moment, I just didn't care. The only thing I was thinking about was kissing you." I smile at her. "In fact, that's the only thing I'm still thinking about."

"You are really cute. But I really have to get back inside. I'm the head cheerleader; I can't set a bad example for the other cheerleaders." I pout at her and she laughs. "I promise we can continue later."

"That sounds better." I grin at her. We share one more kiss before we head back inside.

When I get back to my seat, Kendra doesn't notice me until I sit down.

"What are you smiling about?" She asks with an eyebrow raised.

"I'm just happy to see you." I lie hoping that she buys it, but the look on her face tells me otherwise.

"Fine, don't tell me. I'll find out eventually." She said before she turned her head back to the game or as I like to call it Ivy watching. And I went back to Ashley gawking.

"Hey weren't Chelsea and Carmen supposed to come tonight?" Kendra asked in the beginning of the fourth quarter. I nod and look around for them. Chelsea said she would be here and if she wasn't going to come she would have called to let me know. I check my phone and there's no voicemail or text from her. Now I'm worried. How the hell did I not notice this earlier?

"I'm going to step outside and call her. Something isn't right." I tell Kendra.

"I'll come with you." She stands up and follows me outside.

I call Chelsea and Carmen over and over again but I get no answer.

I yell in frustration and start walking towards the parking lot.

"Where are you going?" I hear Kendra yell from behind me.

"I need to find her. It's not like her to just disappear like this." I say as I continue my walk/jog to my car.

"Spencer" Suddenly Kendra's hands are on my shoulders and she is turning me around. "Take a deep breath." I do as she says. "You cannot drive while you are so worked up. I will help you find them but you need to calm down." She's right. I would have probably gotten into an accident because I would have been so worried about Chelsea and not focused on the road.

I take another deep breath. "I'm fine." I shake my head. "I'm good. Thank you."

"Ok I'm going to drive over to Carmen's and see if they are there. You should drive over to Chelsea's and check there. I'll call you once I find out anything, ok?" Kendra says calmly. I'm happy she can stay calm because if not I would be a complete wreck.

I hug her. "Thank you for helping me and keeping me sane."

"I told you that I was here if you ever needed anything." She smiles at me. "Ok let's go. Call me if anything." I nod and we go to our cars.

As soon as I get in I speed out of the parking lot and down the road. Usually, I would drive the speed limit, but right now I don't care that I'm speeding. If a cop wants to pull me over to give me a ticket for speeding, he or she will just have to follow me to Chelsea's house if they want me to stop.

The fifteen minutes that it usually takes to get to Chelsea's turned into eight. As soon as I pulled up to her house, I hoped out of the car and ran to her front door. I knock on the door for about two minutes before I take out my spare key. I only use it for emergencies and right now is definitely one of them.

When I open the door, everything is dark, pitch black. No one is home. I still search every room in her house thoroughly. My phone goes off as I make my way back downstairs. My heart beats fast and I pull out my phone only to be a little disappointed when I notice it's not Chelsea.

"Are they over there?" Usually I would be more polite when answering my phone, but right now I don't give a damn about pleasantries.

Kendra sighs into the phone. "No. The only person that's here is some guy, who I think is Carmen's stepdad, and the only thing he is doing is singing songs to me, so he's no use." I sigh into the phone and she picks up on this because she starts talking again. "He reeks of alcohol. When I asked him if he was drunk, he said 'I only drink on Sunday's' which is obviously a lie because he started singing to me again." She jokes, probably trying to make me feel better and any other time I would have found that hilarious but right now I can't even crack a smile.

"Kendra what are we going to do? We need to find them!" I yell into the phone. I leave the house and go back to my car and lean against it.

"Try calling her parents and see if they know something." She suggests and I don't know why I didn't think of that myself.

I hang up without saying bye, like I said before fuck pleasantries. I quickly search through my contacts for Chelsea's mom. After a few rings, she picks up.

I hear sniffing and a strangled hello.

"Mrs. Lewis?" I ask worriedly.

All I receive as a response is more crying. I knew something was wrong.

"Hello?" I hear Chelsea's dad's voice come through the phone.

"Mr. Lewis, hi it's Spencer. Is everything okay?" I say in a rush.

"Oh uh Spencer." He seems to be stumbling over his words. "Chelsea was in an accident. We are at the hospital." He says and sniffs a few times.

I feel my eyes feel with tears, some streaming down my face before I can even stop them. "Is…is she…okay?" I force out as I wipe my eyes.

He clears his throat. "We don't know yet. All we know is that on the way to the school she was in a car accident. The doctors said that both she and Carmen are in critical condition. They won't let us see her yet." He says in a semi-strong voice. He is trying to be strong for me when his daughter is practically dying. I really do admire this man.

"I'll be there soon." I tell him and I go to hang up, but his voice stops me.

"We've been here for a while; I don't think they will let you see her. It's best if you just went home and got some rest. Come bac-"

"I don't mean to be rude, but how do you expect me to get some rest when my best friend is in the hospital and I have no idea what's happening to her?" I nearly scream at him.

"I understand. I'll see you soon." I hang up and get into my car. I text Kendra and tell her that I'm going to the hospital.

Once again, I speed my way there. My eyes were blurry but I managed to drive safely. Twenty minutes later I was rushing into the hospital looking for Chelsea's parents.

I see them in the corner, Mr. Lewis holding a crying Mrs. Lewis. It is so heartbreaking to see them like this. I can only imagine what it's like to have my only child in the hospital not knowing what's happening.

Instead of interrupting them, I found a seat close by and just waited. Mr. Lewis gave me a slight head nod when he saw me take my seat.

I put my feet up on the little bench and put my head back on the wall.

"Spencer!" I look up and see Kendra walking towards me. She takes a seat next to me and lets out a loud sigh. "Sorry for I didn't get here sooner. I was speeding on the way back from Carmen's house and I was pulled over." She pulled a piece of paper from her pocket. "The idiot gave me a one hundred and twenty five dollar ticket for going seven miles over the speed limit. I almost punched him when he gave it to me, but I decided that I didn't need to go to jail tonight." I smile for the first time since this whole thing with Chelsea started.

"Thank you for not punching a police officer because I could really use someone here with me right now." I tell her sincerely.

"I figured." She smiles. "I'm sure the game is over by now. You can call Ashley. She would want to be here with you."

I give her a confused look. "Why Ashley?" We just got together like two hours ago, there's no way she would know already.

Kendra rolls her eyes. "Not even a minute after you left the gym to 'get air'" She uses air quotes with her fingers. "Ashley was right after you. Both of you stayed out there for a long time and you came back in right after she did with a huge smile on your face." I look at her in shock. I had no idea she was so perspective. I open my mouth to say something but before I can I hear someone call for the parents of Chelsea Lewis. I jump up right with them.

"I'm Chelsea Lewis' father and this is her mother." Mr. Lewis says. The doctor looks at me skeptically. "And this is Chelsea's sister, Spencer." He says putting his hand on my back. My eyes widen, but I don't say anything.

The doctor gives me another disbelieving look before she clears her throat and continues. "Well the accident was pretty bad because it was a head on collision. Chelsea was very smart to wear her seat belt because this could have been much worse." She pauses and looks down at her chart. "Unfortunately though the impact of the collision forced her head back this had negative effects on her neck."

"What kind of effects?" I ask trying to find out what the hell is going on with Chelsea.

"Well a few bones are fractured which forced us to start surgery immediately." Mrs. Lewis cries louder than before and I feel my face get warm from the tears. "Her right hand was also fractured, her left leg was broken. And she has a lot of scratches and bruises all over." And the cries are louder.

"Is she going to be ok? Did she lose too much blood? I can-can give some of mine if she needs it, just please save her. I can't lose her!" I yell through blurry eyes. And at this point I couldn't stop my tears. I need for Chelsea to be okay.

I feel a hand on my shoulder. Kendra hugs me and whispers that everything will be fine. I know she is trying to help but for some reason it only makes me cry more.

I don't know when I fell asleep but I woke up to the light sensation of someone stroking my hair. I open my eyes and immediately cringe. My eyes are heavy and I have a headache. I close my eyes again and sink into Kendra's lap.

"Mmm" I moan from the soft fingers massaging my head.

"Hey, Sleepyhead." That's definitely not Kendra. I lift my head up quickly.

"What are you doing here?" I say and then I realize that may have come out as if I didn't want her here. "I mean how did you know where to find me?"

"Kendra called and said that you were at the hospital. After I almost had a heart attack, she told me that you were fine besides the constant crying." She smiled at me and wiped a tear that fell from my eye.

"Thank you." I hug her tightly and she squeezes me back. When I pull back I notice that she is still in her cheerleading uniform.

"I came here as soon as I could. When she called, Ivy was just pulling up to my house to drop me off, but we turned right around and came straight here." Ashley says. "So sorry if I smell." She adds with a laugh.

I put my head on her shoulder and nuzzle into her neck. "You smell like Ashley." I whisper.

"I hope that's a good smell." She gives me another one of her sweet giggles.

"The best." I say and she wraps her arms around me. "Have they said anything about Chelsea yet?"

"No they came out here to update her parents on the surgery. Carmen's mom finally came. Carmen hit her head and may have brain damage. She also broke her right leg." She says sadly. "Oh and you might want to check your phone it was going off a lot."

I keep my position on her shoulder and take out my phone. I have a few missed calls from my parents. And a text from Glen and one from Ashley."

"I sent you that before I knew what had happened." I looked at her text.

_I miss you. Are we still hanging out tonight?_

I grin. "I'm sorry if this isn't what you had in mind." I say looking at her.

"Spending hours in a hospital is not exactly what I meant when I said hang out but honestly I wouldn't care where we were, I just wanted to be with you." She smiles and squeezes her arms tighter around me.

"I hate to move but I should call my parents so they don't think that I'm dead or anything." I tell her as I sit up.

"I told Aiden to tell Glen what happened just so he wouldn't worry so much." Could she get any more perfect? "But you should call your parents just so they can know for sure." I guess she can.

"Thank you for being here." I hug her before I get up. I take out my phone and call my parents. I walk outside so I can get a little air. Hospitals can be a little stuffy.

After telling them everything that happened, my mom called to see if she could do something about speeding up Carmen and Chelsea's process.

When I walk back in I see Kendra and Ivy sitting next to Ashley on the bench I was sitting on before. I look back to where Chelsea's parents were sitting and they were both sleeping silently. I really hope Chelsea is going to be ok.

I take my seat next to Ashley again and she immediately wraps her arms around me. We haven't even been together for a day and she already feels comfortable doing this.

"How are you doing?" Kendra asks me.

"Better since I actually know what's happening with her." I tell her. "Thank you for dealing with my craziness earlier and keeping me calm." I say directly to Kendra with a small smile.

"No problem." She shrugs.

I look over at Ivy. She seems to be holding back, like she wants to say something but is scared to.

"Thank you for staying here Ivy. I appreciate it." She seems to be surprised that I said anything to her. She gives me a wide smile and nods. "I'm really sorry for being a bitch to you before. It wasn't right and you didn't deserve that."

"I understand. I reckon I would have done the same thing if I was in your position." There goes that accent again, it's really cute.

"That's no excuse, but thanks for being so cool about it." I say to her honestly and she smiles back.

"See I told you she wasn't so bad." Ashley whispers and I shiver. Her voice does crazy things to me.

"I know. I'm sorry I went all crazy jealous person on you. I promise I won't jump to conclusions again." I bite my lip nervously.

Ashley looks away and then turns back to me with a smirk. She leans closer to me and whispers in my ear. "It's really sexy when you do that." I blush and look down. Ashley looks around and then moves away from my ear. "I understand why it happened. I promise I won't purposely ignore you anymore. It was really hard to do that when all I really wanted to do is this." She says before pulling me forward and kissing me softly on the lips. I smile into the kiss and raise my hand to gently grasp her cheek.

And once again I am only in my Ashley zone. No one else exists but me and Ashley. It is the greatest place ever.

"Spencer, what the hell are you doing?" I jump back from Ashley and look towards where the voice came from, the eerily familiar voice.

When I reach the face I see ice cold blue eyes staring right at me.

"Hey mom." I give a small nervous smile and an awkward wave.

**I hope you enjoyed. Reviews make me extremely happy! Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all of you!**


	24. Chapter 24

"Spencer can you come here please?" My mother says in a not so sweet voice. I get up and slowly walk over to her, my heart is pounding like it is about to burst out of my chest.

This is not how I wanted her to find out. What the hell is she going to do?

"Yes mom?" I ask as sweetly as I can when I get closer to her.

She roughly grabs my arm and takes me around the corner, away from the waiting room. My mother never likes to cause a scene; she cares too much about her reputation so this really isn't surprising.

"What the hell were you doing back there?" She whispers but it comes out as a low yell. I don't even bother to say anything because I know that nothing will come out. Besides I wouldn't even know what to say. "Who is that girl?"

"Ashley." I whisper.

"Did she make you do this? Did she force her-her ways on to you?" I can't believe she would even think that.

"Mom, no I-" I try to explain but she cuts me off.

"Because I know that no daughter of mine would ever contribute to such-such things." It's like she can't say what we are both thinking. "I know that I did not raise you to behave this way, especially in my work place." She stops and runs a hand through her hair. "Are you doing this punish me? Is this because I haven't been home much lately? Is that it, because I can take some time off and we can-"

"Mom, just stop!" I scream at her and she shuts her mouth with a shocked look. "Ashley is my girlfriend. Yes I did kiss her back there and I have plenty times before that. She did not make me do anything. You can't make someone be gay. I am who I am. This has nothing to do with you or anyone else. This is about me." I pause and take a deep breath. I never thought I would be able to stand up to my mom like this but this really needs to be done. I should have told her weeks ago.

"Spencer-" She tries to speak but I don't care about what she has to say right now. I have to get this off of my chest.

"No mom, just stop. I let you talk, let me finish what I have to say." She huffs and throws her arms over her chest. It feels nice having this power. "Nothing you do or say will ever change the fact that I like girls. You will just have to accept that and accept me!"

"I-I can't." She says after a long pause. My eyes fill with tears for like the millionth time that night. She moves forward and puts her hand on my shoulder. "You are my daughter and I will always love you." I smile a little when she says this, but I have a feeling that this isn't over. "But I just can't accept this. I just don't understand why you are choosing this lifestyle for yourself."

I shake my head. "This is not about you mom! If I had a choice about this don't you think I would choose the easier option? Do you think I like having to hide part of myself from everyone for the fear of being out casted because I'm different and who I am is considered a sin?" She opens her mouth but nothing comes out so I continue. "If I could choose, I would continue living the life you have planned for me. I would continue doing everything I could to make you happy. If I could choose, I would choose to have you accept me for me, mom." I tell her and some tears escape and make their way down my face. I wipe my tears and clear my throat. "If you want to continue telling me how wrong I am or how you want me to live my life, then we can do this at home. Right now my best friend was just in an accident and I need to be clear minded so that I can be there for her when she recovers." I walk around her and head back to the waiting room.

When I get there I see Ashley talking to Ivy and Kendra. She looked up at me with a smile, but then it turned into a frown. My red-rimmed eyes probably caused that sudden change in expression. In a second she was up and by my side. This simple act made me give her a small smile. Without questioning me or anything, she wraps her arms around me whispers reassurances in my ear.

"Thank you." I whisper when we pull back. She smiles at me.

"It's nothing. I don't like to see you upset." She leads me back to the bench and we take our seats again. "And besides, I feel really bad for what just happened."

I shrug. "She was going to find out sooner or later."

"I know but she didn't have to find out like that. I feel really bad about that." She sighs. "Usually I would never do anything like that in such a public area, but with you it's" She stops and it looks like she's searching for the right words to say. "With you it's like I can't control myself. It was so hard to stay away from you before, but now that I can call you mine, it's almost impossible."

I smile at her words. And I'm surprised that she feels the same way I do. I mean Ashley is sexy, how can I not want to touch her?

"I know exactly how you feel, so don't worry about it."

"Is everything going to be ok when you get home?" She asks taking my hand in hers and intertwining our fingers.

"I hope so. I mean she probably won't talk to me for a while, but everything else will be fine. I think I was getting to her when we had our little argument." I tell her sadly. "Plus I'll have my dad for support, I'm sure he won't have the same reaction as she did."

"Mr. and Mrs. Lewis?" I hear the same female doctor call out for Chelsea's parents again. I quickly stand up with them. When we reach her, she gives me another uncertain look before continuing. "Chelsea made it through a successful surgery and is recovering in her room. You may go see her but please do not overwhelm her, she needs to stay as calm as possible." After giving us the room information, she went about her business.

Mrs. Lewis barely even waited for the doctor to finish what she was saying before she was making her way towards Chelsea's room. Mr. Lewis stood there looking apologetically at me.

"Go see your daughter. I'll give you some time alone with her." I tell him with a small smile.

"Thank you for being here. I'm sure it will mean a lot to her." I smile at him. "It means a lot to me." He says before heading off to find his wife.

I walk back over to the rest of the girls so that Chelsea's parents can have some alone time with her.

"What did the doctor say?" Kendra asks as I take my seat next to Ashley again.

"Chelsea is recovering from surgery and she can have visitors now." I say with a smile. I am so happy, ecstatic even, that Chelsea is going to be ok. I feel Ashley grab my hand and squeeze it. I look over at her and she smiles at me. I give her a smile back.

"So when are you going to see her?" Ivy asks.

"I'm waiting for her parents so that they can have some time alone with her." I say. "Are all of you going to see her?"

"We were going to let you see her tonight and come back tomorrow. You know so she's not so overwhelmed with a lot of people and she can get some rest." Kendra says.

I nod in agreement. "What about Carmen? Will we be able to see her tonight?" I ask them.

"The doctor said that she will be out all night recovering from her head injury, so we will see her tomorrow as well." Ashley says.

"I really hope the damage isn't too bad. Chelsea is going to be heart broken when she finds out what happened to Carmen." I say sadly.

"I'm sure both Carmen and Chelsea will be fine. And they will be back to themselves in no time." Kendra says.

"I guess you are right." I say.

"Can I talk to you for a second Spencer?" I hear Ashley whisper in my ear. I nod and she stands up. She turns to me and holds out her hand, I gladly accept it. "We will be right back." She says to Kendra and Ivy.

Kendra smirks. "Don't do anything I wouldn't do." Ashley turns and sticks her tongue out at Kendra and then leads me outside.

"I bet you are probably wondering why I needed to talk to you." She looks nervous and I immediately think it's something bad. Is she going to break up with me already? We have only been together for a few hours. I bet my mother scared her off. Maybe she's afraid to be with me. "What are you thinking?"

"I…are you breaking up with me?" I blurt right out.

She gives me a confused look. "No! Not at all." She shakes her head vigorously. "When I said that I wanted to talk to you, it's not because I wanted to break up with you. Actually I wanted to do the opposite." She takes a deep breath. "I think we did this kind of backwards." I give her a questioning look. What is she talking about? "I mean yea we did talk for weeks getting to know each other before we started dating. But we haven't been out on a date. You know the whole traditional date before you make it official thing." She smiles shyly.

"I never thought you were the traditional type of person. I mean we did meet online." I joke.

She laughs. "I know but I want to do this right with you. I want this to last." She says and takes my hands in hers.

"I want us to last too." I tell her.

"Good. So Spencer would do me the honors of going on a date with me?" When she says that, I laugh. I couldn't hold it in. "That was cheesy I know. I just…gosh I'm messing this up aren't I?"

"You are very cute. I never thought you would be this nervous to ask someone, let alone me, out on a date." I say as I take my hands out of hers and put them around her waist.

"Well you are very special to me, so of course I am nervous."

"You have nothing to be nervous about. It's not like I would say no, I am your girlfriend remember?" I lean my head on her shoulder. I love being able to be this close to her.

"I love the way that sounds." She laughs. "You're my girlfriend. Spencer Carlin is my girlfriend!" She is too cute. "Spencer and Ashley are finally together."

"That has a nice ring to it, doesn't it?" I pick my head up and press a soft kiss to her neck. I feel her shiver and I press another soft kiss to her neck. She pulls me back after this and I pout.

"Shouldn't that come after the date? After a few dates actually?" She says after clearing her throat. "Although you never even said yes to the first date."

I stand up straight and look directly into her eyes. "Ashley Davies, I would love to go on a date with you." She gives me a big smile followed by a sweet kiss.

"I don't think you realize how happy you've just made me."

"I might have an idea." I go to kiss her again but I hear someone clearing their throat from the side of us.

I turn to see Mr. Lewis standing there trying not to look at us.

"I'll wait for you inside." Ashley says before kissing my head and going inside.

I walk over to Mr. Lewis.

"Sorry to interrupt, but I want to let you know that you can go see Chelsea now. We would have stayed longer but Chelsea didn't want us to worry and we know that you wanted to visit as well." He smiles at me. I walk closer and give him a hug. He seems a little shocked at first but then he hugs back.

"Thank You." I say.

"No problem." He says as we pull back from the hug. "I'm sure I'll see you tomorrow." He smiles at me before heading to his car.

I walk back inside to the waiting room.

"We just saw Chelsea's parents leave, so we are going to get going as well." Kendra says standing up. She comes to me and hugs me. "She is fine." She whispers in my ear when she pulls back.

Ivy gives me a smile and follows Kendra out. It's only a matter of time before those two get together.

"Do you need me to stay with you?" Ashley asks once we are alone.

"No I'll be fine. Thanks for asking though. I just need to see Chelsea."

"I get it." She hugs me. "Call me if you need anything, I'll be over here faster than you think."

"I will." I kiss her. "Now go home and get some rest." We laugh.

"Ok I'll miss you." She says cutely.

After more kissing and hugging a little more, Ashley finally left. And I'm scared. I am finally going to see Chelsea after all of these hours and I am nervous. I don't want to say or do something that could make her feel worse than she already does.

When I get to her door, I take a deep breath or two before opening the door. As soon as I do, I hear beeping sounds from the machines next to Chelsea's bed. My eyes are only on one thing though, Chelsea's fragile body on her bed. Her leg is in a cast, her right hand is wrapped up, and her neck is covered by a large bandage, not to mention the cuts she has all over her body. I hate that she has to go through this.

"Would you just come in already?" I hear Chelsea whisper/yell to me. Even in a critical state, Chelsea will still be Chelsea. I shake my head and take a seat next to her bed. "You don't have to be scared Spence."

I wipe the few tears that managed to stray down my face. "Hi Chels." I say weakly. And I have no idea what I am supposed to say.

"Did you kick ass tonight?" She asks. I am so confused. What is she talking about? "The basketball game."

"Oh yea it was awesome! We won. I wish you could have been there though." I say sadly.

"I will be at the next one, well whenever they let me out of this hospital." She laughs a little.

"I'm really sorry that this happened to you."

"Spencer it was an accident. There's nothing you could do about it." She coughs and groans a little. I feel bad for working her up. After a moment of silence, she talks again. "How's Carmen doing?"

I clear my throat before answering. "She hit her head pretty hard and she broke one of her legs." I look over at Chelsea and she closes her eyes tight and I see tears starting to flow down her face.

"This is all my fault." She says with more tears rolling down her face.

"It's not your fault Chels. Like you said, it was an accident!" I try to stay calm, but she doesn't need to blame herself for all of this.

"But I was driving the car. She is going to hate me for this. I can't lose her Spence, I love her." She says quietly probably thinking that I didn't hear her. Oh but I did, and this is huge.

"You love her?" I say with a smile. "Aww Chels, that is so sweet. Does she feel the same way?" I'm sure she does. You can see how much they care about each other just by looking at them. Chelsea turns her head away. "She doesn't know yet, does she?" I grin.

"No she doesn't and she probably won't care now."

"I'm sure she doesn't blame you for this. And I'm sure that when you leave here you will still have your girlfriend." I tell her as I try to cheer her up. I get up and take tissue so that I can wipe her tears.

"Ok ok enough about me." She says when I sit down again. "I don't want to cry anymore."

"Do you want me to turn on TV or something?" I get up to do just that but she stops me.

"No I want you to tell me about you and Ashley." I smile at the mention of her name.

"What makes you think that there is something going on between me and Ashley?" I ask with a raised eyebrow.

She scoffs. "Well my parents came and here and asked me why haven't I dated you before. I asked them how they knew that you even liked girls. And they said that you were in the waiting room kissing some girl." She smirks at me and I blush.

"We are finally together." I tell her happily. "And unfortunately my mom caught us kissing in the waiting room." She gasps. "Yea but I stood my ground and told her how I felt. I know it will be hell when I get home, but the happiness I feel when I'm with Ashley over powers all of my mother's negative attitudes."

She smiles big at me. "If I could hug you then I would. I'm very proud of you Spence."

We talked and laughed for hours. At some point Chelsea ended up falling asleep on me and I nodded off in the chair I was sitting in.

I woke up when I heard the door opening. It was a nurse walking in with a clipboard. He gave me a nod then went to check on Chelsea's machine. After writing a few things down he left the room. I took out my phone and it showed 8 am.

I also had a text from Ashley saying that she couldn't wait to see me. I smiled and sent a text back.

"Ashley?" I jump and look over at Chelsea while she just smiles.

"Geez Chels, you scared me!" I place my hand over my chest. "And yes I was texting Ashley if you must know."

"With a smile that big, it couldn't be anyone else." She laughs a little.

Another nurse comes in to feed Chelsea some of what I assume is breakfast. It looked horrible though. During her feeding, Chelsea's parents came back. After chatting for a bit, I decide to go to the cafeteria to calm my growling stomach. I just realized that I haven't eaten anything since before the game yesterday.

On my way there I see Ashley at the front desk and looks like she is arguing with receptionist. I walk up to her.

"What are you doing here so early?" I ask her.

"I brought you breakfast." She says holding up a bag that I just noticed. I can't help but smile big. I have the best girlfriend ever. "I was trying to get to Chelsea's room, but she said visitor's hours did not start yet." I laugh as she gives the receptionist a dirty look.

I engulf her in a tight hug. "Thank you so much Ash. I was just on my way to the cafeteria. I was just going to tough it out because I am pretty hungry."

"I'm glad I can save your taste buds because what I made tastes so much better than hospital food." She laughs. I take her hand and guide her to the cafeteria.

After making a few wrong turns, we get to the cafeteria and find a table for two in the back. Ashley immediately takes out the plates, silverware, napkins, syrup, and two bottles of orange juice. She uncovers my plate and there are pancakes, eggs, and bacon. This looks delicious!

"You made this?" I ask her. This looks like something my dad would make or something I can get at a restaurant.

"Yea, is that hard to believe or something?" She asks as I start eating. I moan as soon as I take a bite. So freaking good! Ashley looks at me with a smirk.

I swallow my food. "No it's just that I wasn't expecting that. You're rich; I would expect you to have your own personal chef." I say before taking another bite.

She laughs. "We did have a chef when I was younger. He was the one that actually taught me how to cook. My mother fired him after a while because she claimed that he tried to make a move on her." She rolls her eyes obviously she doesn't believe that at all. "When he left, I had two options: cook for myself or eat out every day." She shrugs and digs into her food.

"I'm glad he taught you because this is amazing." I take a bite out of the bacon. Heaven! "Cooking for me might have been a bad move on your part."

"Oh really, why is that?" She says with a sexy smirk.

"Because now I will expect you to cook for me." She laughs at me.

"Oh I plan to." When she says this I get a warm feeling in my heart.

This girl is amazing.

**Happy New Year's! I hope you enjoyed the chapter. As always let me know what you think!**


	25. Chapter 25

**Thank you for the reviews, favorites, and alerts. I know it takes forever for me to update but thanks for sticking through it. **

"Have you seen Carmen yet?" Ashley asks as we walk back to Chelsea's room.

"No but I'm not sure if they will let us see her yet. I was lucky to have Mr. Lewis tell the doctors that I was Chelsea's sister so that they would let me see her." I explain to her.

"How is Chelsea?" I feel my eyes tear up again. I hate thinking about my best friend like this. I feel Ashley put her hand into mine and I smile a little. The little notion made me feel somewhat better.

"She is her usual self mentally. She has a lot of cuts but they aren't that bad. She couldn't move much though and it made me feel worse." I sigh. "You know all of this is my fault. Chelsea tried to blame herself for the accident and for what happened to Carmen, but it's really my fault." I continued to walk until I felt my arm tug. I turned around to see Ashley still standing in her spot. "Why did you stop?"

"How is any of this your fault? You weren't driving either car involved in the accident." She tells me and I can tell that she is slightly angry.

I walk closer to her, there's no reason why the entire hospital have to hear what we are talking about.

"It's my fault because they were coming to see me play last night. They could have just stayed in and none of this would have happened." I said hanging my head.

I feel fingers on my chin as they slowly lift my head up.

"Listen to me ok?" Her voice is so firm that I can't help but do anything other than nod. She wipes a tear that made its way down my face. "This is in no way your fault. This could have happened at any time. It just so happen that they were in an accident while they were going to your game. I'm sure that neither Chelsea nor Carmen blames you for this, so don't blame yourself." She wraps her arms around me and then pulls me in for a hug.

"I would be a mess without you here with me." I tell her honestly and nuzzle my face in her neck.

"I know which is why I'm here babe." I pull back from her and smile.

"Did you just call me babe?" My smile gets bigger when she blushes.

"Yea I was trying it out. Do you not like it?" She's cute when she's nervous.

"I think it's cute." I kiss her softly before I start walking again. "Now let's get going so we can see Chelsea."

When we get to her room, Kendra and Ivy were already there. I wasn't expecting Ivy to be here. She didn't really know Chelsea or Carmen that well so I am surprised to see her. I wonder if Kendra had anything to do with that.

"Hey Ashley, thanks for coming to see me." Chelsea says weakly from her bed. She is probably tired.

"No problem Chelsea. I hope you get better soon." Ashley smiles sweetly at Chelsea before taking a seat on the sofa across the room. I follow and take a seat right next to her. She takes my hand as soon as I sit down.

"Aww y'all are so adorable. Everyone at school is gonna be so jealous." Ivy says with a bright smile, and suddenly the room feels extremely tense. We never got around to talking about what will happen at school. "I mean two of the hottest girls at school and they are dating each other!" She added obviously missing the atmosphere in the room.

I shift uncomfortably and release her hand. I know I shouldn't be mad because I knew that we wouldn't be out before we made it official.

"I'm going to go see if Carmen can have visitors now." I say before getting up and practically running out of the room.

When I get out of the room, I lean up against the wall and close my eyes.

"Hey you ok?" I look up to see Kendra with a concerned look on her face.

I let out a deep breath. "I'm fine thanks." I lie.

"You're such a bad liar, but now is not the time to talk about this. Let's go see how Carmen is doing." She pulls me into her and we walk down to the front desk together. I would stay and talk to Ashley but I am really concerned with how Carmen is doing and I am not really sure what I would say to Ashley.

If I was honest with her, I would tell her how I really felt. I would tell her that I just want her to explain why it's so hard for her to come out. We should not be starting our relationship with secrets. It's always so back and forth with her. I want her because she makes me unbelievably happy but then I feel like there's this whole other part to her that I don't know. I'm pulled out of my thoughts when we get to the desk.

After a heated discussion with one of the receptionists, Kendra did a little flirting so that she could get Carmen's room number. I would not have been able to do that, so I am thankful that she came with me.

I got lost yet again. Either this hospital is extremely confusing or I am just bad at direction. Kendra leads us in the right direction and we make it to Carmen's room. I guess I am just bad at direction.

When we walk in the room, Carmen's mother and two younger boys who I am assuming are Carmen's little brothers are sitting around her bed.

I look at Carmen and all I want to do is wrap her up in a hug. She looks so miserable. Her head is completely bandaged. Her droopy puffy eyes match right along with the bruises spread across her face. I notice one of her brothers writing on her leg cast and I let a small smile escape my lips.

"Oh you must be Carmen's friends. She has been asking about a Chelsea. Is that either of you?" Carmen's mother asks.

"No Chelsea is in another room, ma'am. She was in the accident as well." Kendra responds for both of us.

"Oh how is she doing?"

"She is pretty banged up and needs a lot of rest, but she will be fine in a few weeks." I say. "How is Carmen?"

She sighs. "The doctor said that she hit her head pretty hard but not enough to cause brain damage." She laughs. "I always knew she was hard headed."

We talked and laugh while Carmen slept. We shared stories about Carmen and her mother asked us questions about the future and I realized that I'm not sure what I want in my future. Do I want to try to become some famous athlete? Do I even want to go to college? I laugh to myself; my mother would have a fit if she knew I wasn't going to college. If I do go to college, I'm sure she will want me to go into the medical field but I am not really good when it comes to blood and flesh. I shiver just thinking of it.

"Hey mija, look who came to see you?" Carmen's mom says to her as she opens her eyes. By looking at her eyes you can tell how tired she is.

"Hi" She says and then she starts coughing. Her brother gets her some water and holds it up to her lips. She takes a few sips before talking again. "Thanks for coming." She gives us a weak smile. "How's Chelsea?"

"She looks just as bad as you do, but don't worry I'm sure you will be back at it like rabbits in no time." I say and everyone laughs.

Kendra and I stay in Carmen's room for about an hour before I decide that I should go talk to Ashley.

"Can you do me a favor?" Carmen says as we walk to the door. I nod and she continues. "Can you tell Chelsea that I" She pauses before she can say anything more. I see a blush on her cheeks even with her cuts. I have a feeling I know what she was going to say. "Tell her that I miss her and that I can't wait to see her."

"Gosh I'm so jealous of you two." Kendra says and I laugh.

"I'll make sure she gets the message." I wink at her and open the door to leave.

"Those two are so lucky; they are all in love and shit even after they were in this bad accident." Kendra says once we close the door. "I hope I can get that one day. I mean even you have that with Ashley."

"I'm not sure what it is that I have with Ashley." I sigh and run my hand through my hair. Before she has time to question what I just said, I continue talking. "And besides don't think that I don't see how close you are getting to the cute little southern bell." I hip check her.

"Who Ivy?" She says as she tries to hide a smile. "I have no idea what you are talking about."

"I'm sure you don't. I remember you telling me how hot you think she is; all of that can't go away overnight." Everything that happened yesterday seems like it happened such a long time ago.

"Just because I think she's hot doesn't mean that something is going to automatically happen between us." She shoves me playfully as we round the corner.

"Well I think she likes you." I say when we get to the room. I open the door and Ivy and Ashley are talking on the couch while Chelsea sleeps. Ivy smiles once she sees Kendra. I know I am right about this.

"Spencer I need to talk to you for a minute." Ashley says and meets me at the door. And now I'm worried. I have that feeling from last night all over again. I hope it's not bad. Why does she have to say, I need to talk to you? Those are like code words for 'I'm breaking up with you.' "Are we ok?" She asks once we step outside.

"Yea why wouldn't we be?" I tell her. I can't tell her how I really feel because that will just push her away.

"You seemed angry or upset when Ivy mentioned us being out at school." I look down and away from her. She lifts my face up to look at her. "Look at me." She whispers to me. I look up and see the intense stare that she is giving me. "I want to do nothing more than to show you around and tell everyone that you are mine, but I'm not ready for that yet." She takes a deep breath. "I wish it was easy for me to just let this go, but it's not. It's something I've been dealing with my entire life and it's too hard to drop it and just give it up just like that." It looks like she's about to cry. "I'm sorry. I really am. I wish I could change this now, but I can't. I just can't." And the tears start making their way down her face. I do the only thing I can do and wrap her up in my arms. She needs me, so now is not the time for me to be selfish.

"It's fine, Ash, I get it. Like I said before, whatever you are going through must be really important to you if it makes you want to hide who you are. I might not understand now, but hopefully I will when you finally are able to tell me." I rub her back gently as she cries into my shoulder.

A few hours later, Ashley, Ivy, and Kendra leave, after Ashley and Ivy went to say a brief hello to Carmen. Chelsea complained because she was the only one that didn't get to see Carmen, but since they are both bedridden that's not really an option.

"What's been on your mind Spencer?" Chelsea asks late that night.

"Nothing Chels. Nothing." Normally I would tell her but I don't want to add any more stress on her right now.

"Spencer, I may be handicapped at the moment, but I am not stupid." She whispers but I can tell that she is getting tired.

"I just…" I take a deep breath. "I am not ok with hiding my relationship with Ashley. I kind of feel like I'm not worthy of being with her, like our relationship is not important enough for people to know about." I pause. "I know that something is keeping her from all of this, I just wish she would tell me so that I can at least try to help her."

"Do you trust her?" Chelsea asks.

"Yes of course."

"Do you think that she would do anything to purposely hurt you?"

"No?" I question, not really sure where she is going with this.

"Then stop overthinking and questioning everything. Appreciate the fact that you have a girlfriend who cares about you. Give her some time to get her emotions in check. She will come around when she is ready. In the meantime, just enjoy spending time with her and being happy. Don't ruin this before it truly starts." Chelsea finishes and I sit back and ponder what she has said.

I sit there quietly thinking until I end up dozing off.


	26. Chapter 26

I spend the weekend in the hospital with Chelsea until she tells me to go home because she will be ok and because I stink. Rude. I guess she was tired of me using her bathroom.

It was nice being able to stay there with Chelsea so that she wasn't alone. I still feel guilty about all of this so I guess being with her and watching her get better helped in a way. And if I am being completely honest, being here has also kept me from facing my other problems.

I am afraid to go home. I know I was very brave when I told my mom off but I honestly want her approval and acceptance. I mean she is my mother after all. If I had not had more important things on my mind at the time, I probably would have just cried and let her tell me how wrong I was for participating in such ways. I laugh to myself just thinking of how she wouldn't say gay or lesbian. I wonder what she will think when she finds out about Glen.

And then there's my dad. I would like to think that he would be ok with all of this. He is the one person, up until recently, that I have been able to talk to about anything. My mother probably already told him, which means he would have had time to think about what he will do to me when he sees me. He might be just as upset as my mom, or he might be ok with it. I'm hoping for the latter of the two. But then again, if he is ok with it, he might ask to meet Ashley.

Ashley. I sigh. I'm still not sure what to do about her. I want her. Every ounce of me wants her. But I have this fear, this fear from somewhere deep inside of me. Somewhere I am not ready to admit to myself yet. I can't help the feelings that I have for her; these feelings that are way beyond my control. When I talk to her or when I'm with her, I'm the happiest I ever remember feeling. She makes me laugh, she makes me feel special, she makes me blush, she makes me feel sexy, and the fact that she has this much control over me scares me because of the fact that she's keeping something from me. I know we haven't been together for long, but we have been talking for months, which should count for something, right? I am going to listen to Chelsea though. I am not going stress this issue to the point where Ashley can't handle it. I'll wait because not being with her hurts so much more than waiting for her to trust me enough.

I sit in my car after I park in front of my house. Everyone's car is parked in the front so I know that everyone is home. This is going to be loads of fun.

I take a deep breath or four before opening my door and heading towards my house. When I open the door, I'm a little surprised to see Glen and Aiden sitting on the couch playing some video game.

"Look who finally came home." Glen says when he sees me.

"Hey Spencer." Aiden says with big smile. Why is he so happy?

"Um hi." I say to them. "Glen where are mom and dad?"

"Mom's doing some work in her office and dad is cooking dinner." He responds not taking his eyes off of the TV screen. I just shake my head and walk to the kitchen. I hope this goes well.

"Hey dad" I say tentatively when I walk into the kitchen with my heart beating a million miles a minute.

He turns from the stove to look at me with a bright smile. "Hey Spence! How's Chelsea feeling? Did she like the flowers I sent by?" Not what I was expecting but I'll take it.

"She's getting better each day. And she loved the flowers; I could tell that they made her feel special." I smiled at him. "What are we having for dinner?" I say trying to keep the conversation on the good side.

"Spaghetti, are you hungry?" He said turning back to the stove.

"Yea actually. Hospital food is not great." I say and immediately think of Ashley. I smile at the thought of her bringing me breakfast. "I'm going to go shower. I'll be down in time for dinner." I head to the stairs and run up to my room.

I pull my phone out of my pocket and put it on the charger. It died yesterday and I had no way of charging it at the hospital. Ashley is probably thinking that I'm mad at her or something. While it's charging, I head into the shower.

When I finish my shower and get dressed, I immediately check my phone to see if there are any messages on my phone from Ashley. I had a few from her that said that she missed me, one that said that she couldn't wait for our date. And one that said that she couldn't wait to see me tomorrow. My smile gets bigger and bigger as I read each text. I text her back saying that I will see her first thing tomorrow morning.

"Dinner's ready!" I heard my dad yell from downstairs. I put my phone down and walk downstairs.

I walk into the kitchen to see everyone including Aiden sitting at the table.

"Are you going to stand there all day or are you going to join us?" My mom asks in neutral voice.

"Yes I was just…yes" I stutter before taking my seat.

Only the sounds of the forks hitting the glass plates are heard as we began to eat.

"So Aiden, are you planning on playing basketball in college?" My mom asks and I roll my eyes. Why does she always want to talk about school?

"Um yea. I'm hoping that some scouts from UCLA or USC want to recruit me." He says politely.

"Oh Glen was hoping to hear from them as well. You two really are the best of friends." I cough on food when she says that and try not to laugh.

I drink some water. "Sorry wrong pipe." I say because everyone was staring at me, well Glen was glaring.

"What about you Spencer, you haven't talked much about college or the future. What are your plans?" My dad asks.

"I haven't really thought about it. I mean I've applied to some colleges over the summer with mom, but I don't really know what I want to do in the future." I say honestly and I can tell by my mother's face that she is not happy with what I just said.

"Don't worry you still have time." He smiles at me.

"What about basketball? You can get an amazing scholarship for playing and for having such great grades." My mom says.

"If I get any recruits that are interested then I don't see why not." I shrug.

"Do you have any idea what you would like to major in?" My mom adds.

I shrug again. "Not really. I have a few ideas in mind though but nothing's for sure yet." I know she hates that I'm not being fully committed to this.

"What about you Aiden, what do you want to major in?" She never stops does she?

"I was thinking about being a business major. I have always wanted to own my own business one day." So typical for a jock to say.

"See that Spencer, he has plans and goals." She says to me and I just roll my eyes. "So are you single Aiden?" This time both Aiden and I choke on our food.

"I uh…" He looks around. "No I'm not single at the moment Mrs. Carlin."

"That's too bad. I think you and Spencer would have hit it off nicely." She says in the calmest tone I have ever heard.

I turn my head so fast to look at her. "How dare you?" I yell and stand up.

"Spencer" My dad says calmly.

"No dad!" I say to him and turn back to my mother. "Why would you even say that?" Aiden, Glen, and my dad look thoroughly confused.

"Spencer I am just trying to help you. Maybe Aiden can help to-" I cut her off before she can even finish that horrible statement.

"No I do not need Aiden's help or any other guy's help." I try to control my breathing. "I like girls, mom. I have a girlfriend. Why can't you just accept that?"

"Because it's not acceptable!" She yells and it gets deathly quiet.

"Paula!" My dad screams from the other side of the room.

"What Arthur? She needs to know that being that way is not tolerated in this family!"

"Well then I guess you won't like this very much then." Glen says and I watch in horror as he turns and kisses Aiden who does nothing more than grab the back of Glen's head and pull him closer together.

I turn back to my mother as her eyes go wide. You can practically see the smoke coming out of her ears.

"Glen, stop it now!" She yells but they continue. I watch as she walks over to them and pulls them apart. "I said stop that now!" Her face is unbelievably red. "You" She grabs Aiden's shirt collar and pulls him up. "Get out of my damn house!" She screams as she drags him to the door. Once she was there she opened it, pushed him out, and shut it again. She turns back towards the kitchen with purely ice cold eyes. "How dare you disrespect me like that?" She stalks back towards the kitchen.

"I did not disrespect you. If I was kissing my girlfriend it wouldn't be disrespectful, would it?" Glen challenges.

My mother opens her mouth and closes it again. I guess Glen shut her up for a while. Good because I thought she would never stop.

"Paula let's take some time to think about this." My dad always the rational one. My mother looks at him then at Glen and finally at me. She looks at my dad again before walking upstairs. A few seconds later we hear her door slam.

"How about we have a talk in the living room?" My dad says to us and we follow him into the living room.

Glen and I take a seat on the sofa while dad sits on the chair across from us. By the look on his face you can tell that he is having a hard time figuring out what to say.

"Are you going to kick us out?" Glen asks and I look at him like he is crazy. I glance at my dad and notice that he's giving him a similar look as well.

"Why would you think that, Glen?" He asks.

"Because you don't like our 'life styles' so I thought you didn't want us around." Glen replies using air quotes.

"Your mom is the one that has a problem with the people that you like and the people that you are. I don't think it matters either way. What matters is that you are my children and I don't care what she says, both of you are staying in this house." My dad says in a tone that I've never heard him use before. It was so strong and adamant. "I love you and I hate that she makes you feel like we will kick you out of your own home." He angrily wipes his eyes before a tear can even make its way down.

I hop up off of the couch and sit on the arm of his chair. I wrap my arms around his shoulders. "I love you." I whisper to him and I feel him squeeze his arms around me.

He kisses my forehead. "I will always love you Spencer, no matter what."

That is exactly what I needed to hear. I didn't know what to expect before I walked in here. And now, now I know all I needed to know.

Glen finally joined our little hug fest and we spent a while hugging and crying. Sounds like one of those cliché sappy movies right? I'd take cheesy over being lonely and crying any day.

"Ok dad I'm going to go finish some homework and head to bed. Good night." I hug him. Before I leave I remember something. "Oh and Glen." He looks at me expectantly. "Thanks for what you did back there. I really appreciate it." I say motioning towards the kitchen.

"I couldn't let you go down all by yourself, little sis." I roll my eyes at him calling me little sis, but in reality I actually kind of like it.

When I get to my room, my phone goes off. Picking it up I see that its Ashley calling and I grin. I answer it and get settled into bed.

"Hey sexy" I say while smiling.

"Do I have the right number?" I hear her fumbling around with her phone. "Is this really Spencer Carlin?" I roll my eyes at her even though she can't see me.

"Yes it's me."

"I'm just confused because I don't think I've ever heard the word sexy come out of your mouth before." She laughs. "I like it."

"There are a lot of things you haven't heard come out of my mouth yet."

"I really like this side of my girlfriend. It's hot." I still love it whenever she refers to me as her girlfriend. "So what are you wearing?'

"Ash!" I scold.

"What? I thought that's where this conversation was headed so why not get straight to the point?"

"That's so not where the conversation was going. At all."

"Hmm maybe it was just me." She giggles.

"I think so. And besides, you have to take me out first before you can get into my pants."

"Is that all it takes because I would have done that months ago." She pauses to laugh at her own jokes. "You know I could take you out tonight. I coul-"

"Uh no Ashley. It's going to take more than just a date for me to sleep with you. I'm not a whore."

"I know. You are so much more than that." I blush at her words. "This is why it is so hard for me to figure out where to take you for our date."

"It doesn't have to be anything big. I just want to spend time with you, and have fun." It's quiet for minute and I can practically hear her thinking.

"I got it! I know exactly where I want to take you." She says excitedly and I can't help but get excited too.

"And where is it that you want to take me?"

She laughs loudly. I have no idea what's so funny. "Do you really think I'm going to tell you?"

I pout. Once again it's not like she can see me so I don't know why I'm doing it. "Just so you know, I'm pouting at you."

"Well I'm glad I'm not there because then I would probably cave in and tell you. Your pout is probably deadly."

"It is. I've been using it on my dad for years and it still works." She chuckles. "Are you really not going to tell me?" I whine.

"No but I will tell you that I am picking you up Thursday night at seven, so be ready."

"That's all you're telling me. How will I know what to wear if I don't know where we are going?" I got her now.

"Dress casually, like you are just meeting a friend up for coffee or something." Damn it! I thought I would get her to tell me. She is good. "And before you try to get more information out of me, I think it's time for us to go to bed."

"But I-"

"Good night baby." I blush and feel the butterflies in my stomach.

"Goodnight Ash." I hang up the phone and lie back on my pillow. This is the perfect way to end the night. We should do this every night, is my last thought before I fall fast asleep.

**Tell me what you think, please? **


	27. Chapter 27

**I know it took me forever to update, I'm sorry. But to make up for that, here is my longest chapter yet. I hope you enjoy it!**

This morning in my house was rough. My mom did not say one word to me or Glen. She seemed a little angry with my dad too, but I think that was only because he didn't back her up on her anti-gay raid.

Glen and I left as fast as we could. I hate having my mom look at me with so much disgust in her eyes. I'm not sure if I like it when she's bugging me about being better or if she doesn't talk to me at all.

I was happy to finally get to school. Weird right, someone is actually happy to go to school. But as you know I have my reasons, and one of them is on their way over here right now, looking hot as always.

"Hi" I greet her with a friendly smile which she doesn't really return.

"Hey how are you?" She asks looking a little worried. I give her a confused look and she continues. "Aiden told me what happened with your mom last night. Why didn't you tell me when I called?"

I sigh and run my fingers through my hair. "I didn't want to think about it, so talking about it was not even an option."

She sat down next to me and put her hand on my leg. I shivered from the touch of her warm fingers on my skin. She turned and looked directly into my eyes.

"You know you can talk to me whenever you need right? I'll always be there to listen or hold you." She says with a shy smile.

"I know and if I need to talk, I promise you will be the first person I talk to."

"That's all I ever ask for." She responds with a wide smile. All I can think about right now is how much I want to kiss her. She gives me a look that tells me that she knows exactly what I'm thinking. I turn away because if I keep looking at her, I know I will kiss her, right here out in the open, in front of everyone.

The next thing I know I am being pulled up and dragged away from my table.

"Ashley wh-"

"Just keep walking." She says and I follow her as she walks to…I have no idea where. As I walk behind her I decide to check out the view. My eyes stay trained on her ass as she swiftly walks. I am happy that my girlfriend likes to wear skin tight jeans.

She turns suddenly and I look up at her guiltily.

"Who knew innocent little Spencer would be checking out other girls asses." Ashley says with a smirk.

"I was not…ok fine you caught me, but can you blame me you have a nice ass." I feel a blush rushing to my cheeks. She laughs as she grabs my hand and pulls me into a room. Why did we go all the way across campus to use a bathroom? No one ever uses this bathroom anyway. She drags me into a stall and locks it shut.

"Why are we he….mmm" I was cut off by her lips. She put her arms around my neck and I wrapped my arms around her waist and pushed her back against the door. I put more effort into the kiss now that I am no longer surprised and more interested in her lips. She moans in response and as she slightly parted her lips, I was able to feel the warmth of her tongue on mine. It was my turn to moan.

She began moving her hands from my neck, across my shoulders, and making me shiver as her fingers scraped the sides of my breasts. Soon her hands were on my waist and she began rubbing my sides in slow circular motions. Parts of me were getting very excited. As our tongues danced, I savored her taste. I couldn't get enough of her. Her hands on my hips stopped moving as she pulled me impossibly closer to her. We were both now pressed up against the bathroom stall's door. I took this opportunity to do something brave. Moving my hands lower and stopping when I reach her ass, I squeeze once before lifting her up and wrapping her legs around my waist. She moaned again and I smirked.

Her arms were now back on my neck pulling me in for another kiss. My hands stay on her ass squeezing and rubbing in rotation. As we pulled back for air, she bit down on my bottom lip and soothed it over with her tongue. She is only making me want her more. I gave her a peck on her lips before kissing my way down to her neck. Hearing her moan as I suck, bite, and kiss her neck urges me more. My hands still working on her ass and my mouth busy on her neck.

"God Spence." Her moans fill the air as she begins bucking her center into mine. Her hands found my head and she pulled me back up to her lips. I pressed my body even more into hers. Can we possibly get any closer? I am brought out from my thoughts when I feel Ashley's hands caressing one of my breasts.

"Mmm" I mumble against her lips. If we continue, I know that I will want her right here, and I don't want our first time to be in a bathroom stall.

I slow down the kiss, but she continues kissing me. Her lips trailing to my neck and I can't help but let another moan slip out.

"Ash…oh" I stuttered as she bit down on my pulse point. "Ash wait." I lightly push on her shoulders. She looks at me with dark lust filled chocolate eyes.

"What's wrong?" She asks sincerely. I shake my head and let her legs down gently.

"Nothing, I am perfectly ok, but I don't think I will be able to stop if we keep doing that." I tell her honestly. She smiles at me before giving me one last kiss on my lips and then leaving the bathroom stall. I follow her and watch her as she fixes her clothes in the mirror. God my girlfriend is beautiful.

I hear the bell ring and I sigh, I really don't want to go to class in this condition. I check myself in the mirror to make sure that I am decent enough to face the world. After fixing my clothes, I notice that my lips are a little swollen from the kissing.

"Come on Spence; let's go before we are late." Ashley grabs my hand and turns for the door, but before she can get there I pull her into me and kiss her one last time. "It's going to be hard not to do that all day." She says when we separate.

"I know exactly how you feel. I wish we could do that all day." I whisper into her lips. She kissed me again and turned out the bathroom. I walked right behind her, once again enjoying the view.

"Haven't you had enough of my ass for the day?" I hear Ashley say from in front of me.

"I can never have enough of it or any part of you for that matter." I smirk at her.

We finally make our way to first period. Ashley and I sit in the back corner of the classroom and wait for the teacher to begin the lesson. I spent the entire class period forcing my eyes to stay on the teacher because having Ashley less than three feet away from me is such a huge distraction. What if Ashley was my teacher? That would be so fucking hot. I would definitely be the first in line for some extra credit. I wouldn't mind being the teacher's pet.

"Spencer!" I feel a shake on my arm which effectively stops my image of Ashley sitting behind the teacher's desk wearing glasses, a skirt, and a shirt that showed just the right amount of cleavage.

"Um yea?" I look up to see that Ashley and I are the only ones left in the room.

"The bell rang like two minutes ago and you didn't even budge. What's going on in that head of yours?" She asks with a smile. I blush and pick up my things to leave.

"Nothing, I just zoned out a little you know." I laugh lightly and hope that she changes the subject.

"You are supposed to be the smart one here, if you keep zoning out then who is going to do my homework?" Ashley teases.

"You." I say with a straight face. "I already have enough homework as it is so you can have fun doing yours."

We reach my class and Ashley stops. How did she know where my class was?

"Will you at least come over after school and help me?" She says with a hopeful smile.

"I wish I could but I have practice and then I am bringing Chelsea and Carmen their homework at the hospital." I tell her sadly and her face visibly falls. I wish I could just drop everything and spend all of my time with her but life is not that easy.

"Oh right, of course you are. I feel so stupid." She covers her face with her hands.

I laugh at her and uncover her face. "You're not stupid. I'm sorry that I can't help you though." The bell rings which means that Ashley is late for class and now I feel even worse. "Get to class before you get in trouble."

"Ok I'll see you in fourth." I smile as I watch her walk away.

During the classes I didn't have with Ashley, she still had a way of distracting me. I couldn't get her off of my mind. I decided to write about it since it seems to be what I can do best. When I opened my journal in second period, it was folded on a page that had an unfinished poem. I decide to finish but making it more suitable for now.

When fourth period came around, I couldn't write because Ashley sat next to me again and I didn't want to risk her seeing it yet. I wanted to give it to her when the time was right, in a special moment.

After class, we walked to lunch together and I was surprised to see Kendra and Ivy already sitting there. They need to just get together already.

"You think they're fucking yet?" I hear Ashley say from my side causing me to stop dead in my tracks.

"Ashley!" I scold. She stops when she realizes that I am no longer walking with her.

"What? I was just asking. They are obviously into each other, so it's only a matter of time." She shrugs and continues to walk to the table. I watch her as she drops her bag and sits across from them. I follow her and take my seat next to her. "Spencer wants to know if you two are fucking yet." Ashley says when we sit down. What a bitch! Both of their heads spin towards me and Kendra glares at me. I turn to Ashley and give her a look. You know THAT look. "Actually it was me who wanted to know. Spencer had nothing to do with it." She gives me a look that says 'happy' and I smile triumphantly.

"Ok number one, no we are not, as you so eloquently put it, fucking. We are just friends." I see Ivy frown a little after Kendra says this. "And number two, Ashley you are so whipped!" Everyone laughs except for Ashley. "Oh don't be so down about it Ashley, at least we can tell that you are getting some." Kendra adds. I look down.

"We haven't uh um" Ashley begins but is cut off by Ivy.

"You haven't had sex yet?" Ashley and I both shake our heads no.

"We've only been dating for like a weekend. Do you think we are slutty or something?" I say to them.

"No but you've been practically dating for weeks now so it's about time and besides from the hickey on Ashley's neck, I thought it already happened." Kendra says nonchalantly.

I turn my head and examine Ashley's neck. Fuck. I blush when she takes out a tiny mirror from her bag and finds the hickey on her neck.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to. I was sort of caught in the moment and-"

"Spence chill. If anyone asks, I'll just say I burned myself with my straightener." She shrugs. "I promise." She adds while putting her hand on my thigh and giving it a light squeeze. I sure hope it will be ok. I don't want anyone asking her questions that she's not ready to answer or deal with yet. I gave her a smile to let her know that I am fine and went on to eating my lunch, which I happily shared with Ashley.

I went about the rest of my classes as normal but I missed Ashley a lot. I couldn't finish the poem because the teachers decided to actually teach.

Last period came and I was excited to get to practice. In the locker room a lot of the girls congratulated me from the game on Friday night. I actually feel respected.

"Hey Carlin" I hear as I walk inside the gym. I turn to see Jessica standing off to the side. I roll my eyes and walk over.

"Yea?"

"I just wanted to say you played pretty good the other night. And uh I'm glad to have you on this team." It seemed like that was hard for her to get out.

"Thanks. I'm glad to be here." I say before I walk away. I was surprised that she even said anything to me. After what Chelsea and Carmen did to her, she didn't even look my way when she didn't have to; I like that better than her attacking me while I'm trying to play.

Practice was the usual. It felt good to be on the court. The whole thing with Chelsea still gets to me from time to time so being able to run and take my mind off of things really helps.

After practice, I go to the office to pick up Chelsea and Carmen's homework and drive to the hospital. I drop off Carmen's homework at the front desk because she apparently has the maximum amount of visitors at the moment, stupid hospital rules.

Opening Chelsea's door, I see her resting in bed and watching television.

"I have a present for you." I say in a sing song voice as I walk to the chair next to her bed. She turns to me and her eyes light up.

"Ooh what did you get me?" She says like a child waiting to open a Christmas present. I'm going to love bursting her bubble.

I laugh at her and pull the papers out of my bag. "Your homework!" Her smile falls instantly and I laugh harder.

"In that case, you can throw it away."

"Oh come on Chels, I think it's one of the best presents you've ever gotten."

"You know what you're right. But because I'm such a nice friend, how about I share it with you?" I love my best friend. Even while she is stuck in a hospital bed with broken bones, she is still making jokes.

"No thank you. It would be rude of me to take your gifts." I say and put the stack of papers on her bed side table.

"So how was school without me?" Ugh she's so full of herself.

I tell her about the uneventful day leaving out the make out session with Ashley in the morning, but including the part about how whipped she is.

I stay there for about two hours with her. She seems to be getting better and I just can't wait until she is out of here.

I finally get home at about six, and surprise surprise my mother's car is not there. Walking into the house, I smell something sweet coming from the kitchen. I really hope dad's baking one of his delicious desserts.

"Hey Spence, how was your day?" He greets me as I walk in the kitchen.

"It was ok. I had classes, practice, you know the usual. Where are Glen and mom?" I look in the oven and smile when I see that he is baking strawberry cake. My dad only makes this when something is wrong, so I know that my mom won't be home for a while. I should be more upset about this but I really love strawberry cake.

"Glen is over at Aiden's but he should be home for dinner. And your mom took an extra shift at work." Figures.

"Oh well I'm going to start on my homework. Call me when dinner is ready." I try to leave fast but I'm stopped by my father's voice.

"Spencer." I turn and look at him. "You know that I love you right?"

I smile at him. "Yea dad, I love you too." I walk to him and hug him tightly.

I'm able to get through a good portion of my homework before my dad calls me down for dinner. Glen and dad are already at the table, ready to eat. I take my seat and we dig in.

"So Glen how is Aiden?" My dad starts off some dinner conversation.

Glen, thankfully, chews and swallows his food before speaking. "He is good. He was more worried about me than anything."

"And how are you?" I ask. I feel bad that I haven't had the chance to speak to him all day today.

"I'm good." He shrugs, but I can tell that he is going to say something else. "I just wish that mom wasn't being such a bitch about this."

"Glen" My dad warns.

"No dad, she is being a bitch. I mean we like people of the same sex so what, it's not like we are going out killing people." Glen argues back.

"Your mother just needs time to figure this all out. She will come around. She loves you, both of you."

I hear Glen mumble a 'whatever' before going back to his food.

"So Spencer, when am I going to meet this girlfriend of yours?" I choke on my food when my dad addresses me. "Careful now, it was just a question." He chuckles.

I clear my throat before talking. "I um I don't think that's such a good idea."

"Why not? Do you think I'm going to embarrass you or something?" Yes!

"No I uh just think that it's too soon. We just started dating." It's the truth!

"Well I'd still like to meet the girl that's making my daughter smile every time I see her." I smile at the thought of Ashley. "And there it is again." I can't help it; she just makes me so happy.

"You will meet her soon dad, ok?" He nods at me and continues eating. The rest of dinner was filled with little chatting, none of which had anything to do with my mother. I know Glen didn't want to talk about her and I think that my dad didn't know what he could say to get us to understand where she was coming from.

I finished my homework after dinner. As I get settled into bed that night, I pick up my phone and call Ashley.

"I've missed you so much." I smile when I hear her voice.

"And I've missed the sound of your voice."

We stayed on the phone for almost two hours and the only reason we got off was because she fell asleep. The even sounds of her breathing lulled me off to sleep within seconds. I wish I was able to sleep next to her.

Tuesday was very similar to Monday. My mom was home but she was sleeping this time. I had another make out session in the bathroom with Ashley before school and tried not to get distracted by her in the classes we shared. After a hard workout from practice, I spent a while at the hospital with Chelsea and Carmen. Both of them seem to be getting better and they should be out of the hospital within a week.

Wednesday was game day. Unfortunately, there was no morning make out session because our bathroom was taken. Instead we just stayed out in the quad with Kendra and Ivy. I should have been more focused on the game that but all I had on my mind was the date with Ashley on Thursday. I was still curious to know where she was planning on taking me. I finished and polished up the poem that I wanted to give to Ashley. I hope that she likes it. I usually don't like to let other people read my work, but she's special.

"Are you ready for the game tonight Spencer?" Kendra asks while we eat our lunch.

"Yea I'm more nervous than anything." I say as I rub the back of my neck.

"Don't worry babe, I'm sure you will be amazing again." Ashley whispers as she scoots closer to me and rubs her hand on my leg. I look around to make sure no one is looking and let out a sigh of relief to see no one is worried about us.

"Aww how sweet." Ivy says and I was expecting Ashley to move her hand on my leg but it's still there and she is moving her hand in circular motions. She is killing me here.

"I'm just um going to go to the bathroom. I'll uh be right back." I say suddenly and stand up and walk towards the bathroom. I needed to get away from Ashley and her roaming hands.

When I get there, I splash a little water on my face and when I look up I see Ashley behind me.

"Um hi" I say weakly to her as I wipe my face.

"Is everything ok?" She asks looking concerned.

"Yea I'm fine. I was just uh" I couldn't finish the sentence. Instead I could feel the blush creeping up on my face. Ashley obviously catches this because she smirks at me and pulls me into one of the stalls.

A few minutes later, I have my legs locked around Ashley's waist and her lips are on my neck.

"Ashley?" We freeze at the sound of footsteps getting closer to the bathroom stall. I look into her eyes and I see fear. We stay silent in hopes that this person leaves. "Ashley I know you're in here. I saw you walk in here five minutes ago." Shit it's Madison. "And I can see your feet under this stall." She says as she knocks on the door. We are so screwed.

"Uh one second." Ashley yells back. I move one leg from around her, but I keep my legs up on the back of the toilet so that Madison cannot see them under the door. Ashley laughs at my position as she opens the door. "What's up?" I hear her say once she gets out.

"What's up with you, you've been all distant lately." I can tell that Madison is a little concerned and a little annoyed.

"Nothing, I just um, Aiden and I broke up." She blurts out. What? Why is she doing this? I thought he was her cover.

"What when?" It goes quiet for a minute. "Does this have anything to do with Spencer? I thought you said that was a onetime thing and it didn't mean anything." I feel my heart sink when I hear those words come out of Madison's mouth.

"Can we please not talk about this right now?" Ashley pleads. I'm not sure if I wanted them to continue that conversation or not.

"Yea ok. Are you still going to Sherri's party after the games tonight? There will be lots of guys there for you to rebound with." I cringe at the image of Ashley 'rebounding' with a guy.

"Actually I will probably hangout with Spencer instead." I'm surprised by this because we didn't have any plans to hangout until our date tomorrow night.

"What is it with you and her? What's so great about Spencer? Until she started playing basketball, she was nothing but Glen's nerdy sister!" Madison exclaims. Is that what people thought of me?

"How dare you talk about her like that? You don't know anything about her!" Ashley yells then takes a deep breath. "Are you jealous of her? Is that what this is about?"

"Why would I be jealous of her? She has nothing that I want." Madison defends.

"You're jealous because I've been spending a lot more of my time with her instead of with you."

"Ashley you and Ellen can spend as much time as you like together. I could honestly care less. Don't run back to me when you come to your senses." I hear footsteps getting further away and the door swing shut soon after.

"Are you ok?" Ashley says as she opens the door of the bathroom I was hiding in. I step down off of the toilet and walk out to her.

"Yea I'm fine." I lie. The truth is I have so many different thoughts running through my head, all of which are negative. "We should get back to lunch, I'm sure Kendra and Ivy are wondering where we are." I say as I walk towards the door without another look at her.

When we get to the table, I don't say much for the rest of lunch. Ashley kept looking at me and making subtle attempts to touch me but I just brushed it off.

She walked me to my class after lunch and I stayed quiet the entire time.

"What's wrong Spencer?" She asked as we stopped in front of my class.

"Nothing why do you ask?" I say playing dumb.

"Oh I don't know. One minute you are all over me and the next you won't even let me touch you." She whispers.

"I'm fine. Look you should get to class before you're late. I'll see you later." I say and I walk into my class. When I take my seat, I look out the door to see her still standing there with her head down like she's lost. The bell rings and her head jolts up then she heads off to class, I assume.

I hate being like this towards her, but I feel like it's the only way I can protect myself. Building up walls and keeping my feelings in, is the only way I know how to protect myself.

Throughout my remaining classes of the day, I received numerous texts from Ashley asking me why I won't talk to her and what could she do to make things right. I didn't respond to any of them. What I wanted to say could not be explained over a text.

When basketball practice came up, we did our normal routine before a game. We ran a few laps, did a few drills, and practiced a few plays. When we had our break, I didn't know what to do. I had all of these thoughts on my mind that just wouldn't go away. They just kept repeating over and over and over again. It was like my own mind was haunting me.

The smart thing to do in this situation would be to talk to Ashley about how I am feeling and maybe she would be able to put me at ease. But honestly right now I am not thinking logically.

I spent my entire break sitting in on the bleachers, looking out on the empty court, just thinking. Kendra tried to figure out what was wrong with me but I just told her that I was nervous for the game and I think she knew that there was something more to it than that but she didn't push it. I'm glad that she didn't because if she kept pushing, I would have probably taken out all of my anger on her, and that would have not been fair to her at all.

I had to wrap my head around Ashley telling Madison that I was some sort of mistake. I know that she had to tell Madison something to get her off of her back but did she really have to tell her that I meant nothing? Hearing that made me question what I really meant to Ashley. Is this something real or is this some big game that she's playing with me? So much of my feelings are invested into this relationship that if it did turn out to mean nothing to Ashley, I would probably not know what to do with myself.

The more I think these thoughts, the angrier I get at Ashley.

While we were in the locker room right before the game, the nerves in my stomach increased tenfold. I was not mentally ready for this game. My mind was elsewhere.

Running on to the court, I avoided the cheerleader section this time. I will avoid Ashley as much as I can. As Coach gives us a last minute pep talk, I look around the gym to see if I can spot my family. I first spot Glen and Aiden sitting in the middle section all the way at the top. I asked him to record the game for Chelsea, and I hope he and Aiden can pull their two brain cells together and do this because right now it looks like they are having trouble trying to figure out how to work it. Ugh idiots.

I continue looking for my parents and I stop scanning the crowd once I get to my dad. He is sitting alone and when he catches my eye he gives me a wave. I wave back and then I look around for my mother. I first look towards the door, up and down the bleachers, and finally at the small concession stand on the side. There is no sign of her anywhere. I look back towards my dad and he frowns and shakes his head.

This is just great. Exactly what I needed. First everything with Ashley and now my mother can't even support me at my game?

I hear the announcer as he begins to call the starting lineup for the night. When I hear my name, I slowly make my way to court, halfheartedly slapping everyone's hands.

As the game starts, I keep checking the bleachers checking to see if my mom had showed up. I still had a tiny bit of hope that she would make it.

By half time, we are down by ten and my mom has still not arrived.

"Hey what's up with you out there?" My coach asks once we get back to the locker rooms.

"I'm just not having a good day." I tell her and that is the truth.

"Whatever it is, try to fix it, we can still come back and win this. You are my star player and I need your head in the game." She says before walking off to the rest of the team.

I wish I could fix it. I wish it was that easy.

During the second half, I wasn't much better. I missed easy baskets and made stupid fouls. This is definitely not one of my best days.

We ended up losing 72-55. Yea I'm ashamed too. I let my team down and I wish I had tried harder but I just couldn't focus.

I showered after the game and went out to the gym to watch Glen play. I wanted to leave and crawl into a hole, but I felt bad for not watching the last game while he has sat through both of mine.

Kendra sits quietly with me. She doesn't ask any questions, she's just there. I guess that's why our friendship is so easy, we get each other. In all honesty though, I think she's being so quiet because she's pretty much eye fucking Ivy whenever she cheers. Me on the other hand, I am doing anything I can to avoid looking at the cheerleaders.

King wins the game with the score of 81-69. Right at the final whistle, I rush straight out of the gym, making Kendra jog to keep up.

We get to the parking lot and as we are about to go to our separate cars, Kendra's voice stops me.

"Were you thinking about going to Sherri's party tonight?"

I laugh bitterly. "I'm thinking about going home and lying in bed."

"Ok I'll be there so if you change your mind, I'll see you there." She turns and goes to her car, while I continue the walk to mine.

"Spencer!" I almost stop when I hear Ashley's voice, but I don't. "Please Spencer, can you please wait up?" I hear the sadness in her voice, so of course I stop. When she finally reaches me she just looks at me.

"What's up?" I ask her as I lean against my car.

"What's up? Really?" She looks at me incredulously. "You all of sudden are avoiding my like the damn plague without giving me any reason at all, and all you have to say is 'what's up?'" She yells. I shrug because I really don't feel like doing this right now. I am not in a great mood and her yelling is only going to make it worse. She steps closer to me. "What's going on? Did I do som-"

"No Ashley, it isn't about you. I just don't want to talk about it."

"Then what is it? If it's not about me, why won't you talk to me then?" I can tell that she is getting angry.

"Why do you keep pushing it? Just leave it alone!"

"I'll leave it alone when you tell me why you are all of a sudden so upset."

"I don't have to tell you anything, so just leave it alone like I said before." I tell her through gritted teeth.

"All I am asking you to do is to open up to me and not push me away!"

"You want me to open up to you? Is that a fucking joke? You are the one keeping things away from me! Not the other way around. Just because I don't tell you one thing that's bothering me, you yell at me for not opening up. Ha! That is really fucking funny." I yell angrily at her.

She's quiet for a moment before she speaks softly again. "You said you'd wait until I was ready."

I know I shouldn't say what I'm about to say, but it's like word vomit so I can't help myself. I'm angry and fed up, once I start, I'm hard to stop. And I keep hearing Madison's words in my head, on repeat. 'It didn't mean anything. It didn't mean anything. It didn't mean anything.' Having Ashley right in front of me makes it worse. The words come out before I can even control them.

"I know what I said, but you didn't wait until I was ready. You just pushed and pushed, even though you could obviously tell that I didn't want to talk about it." I can't do this right now. "You want to know why I'm so upset, Ashley?" she nods her head so I continue. "I'm upset because my mother is so disgusted with the fact that I like girls over guys that she hasn't spoken to me in days. She couldn't even show up to cheer me on for my game. And as much as it hurts, I won't tell her because I'm afraid of being rejected even more by her." My eyes are really blurry, so I angrily wipe my tears away before finishing. "And, I'm upset because the girl I am falling for has to go around telling her friends that I don't mean shit to her. And when I hear this, I can't help but think that it might actually be true. Because let's face it, you don't exactly have the greatest past when it comes to relationships with other girls."

Her eyes are watery and I know that I have really hurt her at this point. As much as I want to go over there and wrap my arms around her to comfort her, I don't, I stay rooted in my spot.

"Spencer I know that you are mad at your mother, I understand. But how could you even question my feelings for you? Do you know how much of my time is spent revolved around you or thoughts of you?" I want to believe her but my anger is blinding any positive thoughts I have at the moment.

"Whatever Ashley, I don't know if I can believe anything you tell me anymore." She looks down and I can see a few tears make their way down her face. "You know what, you can go run back to Madison now, and tell her about the huge mistake you made once again."

And with that I get my car and speed off.

**Thanks for reading. Don't hate me. Please review if you like.**


	28. Chapter 28

**ConnieLaxer12**- Yay thanks for understanding that everything can't always be easy.

**Beccajean823-** What will Ashley do? Hmm

**FFReviews-** lol yes the strawberry cake seemed to be only thing that went well for Spencer. But they do need to open up to each other because being closed off only makes it harder for the other person to get through.

**Brucas4ever **– I'm glad you can see Spencer's side of it. Thanks for reviewing!

**Rioshix**- I'm sorry that your parents are not like Mr. Carlin. It would be awesome if someone had support in times like these. I hope things get better.

**Idwalkthroughhell4u**- that's exactly what I was trying to show in that chapter. Everything you said was what I was hoping every reader took from the chapter so I'm glad you understand what I was trying to do. And yes there is only going to be that one car accident lol. Thanks for reviewing!

**Breakdown6**- lol thanks for reviewing even if it wasn't a full-fledged review. I'll fix it soon.

**Godlove**- Thanks for being a consistent reviewer! I'm glad you are enjoying it.

**Sugar Mama **– haha that reference was just for you. And they will not be having make up sex lol at least not in this chapter.

**Derpalicious**- nice name lol. And thanks for not hating me, I'll make it better.

**Judelltar**- They both messed up, but you think Ashley should fix it? hmmm maybe. Thanks for reviewing!

**spagetti o's-** I'm sorry that you do not like the way the story is going.

**Drunky-** I'm glad you loved it lol.

**Hugbuddy13**- they do need to talk and open up to each other, I agree. Thanks for reviewing.

**My-forbidden-love-for-her** – thanks for reviewing. I hope you like this update.

**OneLiner-** Yea the date probably won't happen when it was originally was planned, but it will happen eventually. You think Spencer should fix it for overreacting? That's one of the few. Thanks for reviewing.

**Spashley12**- I'm sorry that it was a sad chapter, I'll try to write some more happy chapters.

**SoNfan1604**- I'm glad you can see both sides to the story and not place blame on one person. They both have their reasons for doing things that they do so being together can be hard. Thank you for reviewing!

**Gregg** – I hope this is soon enough lol

**Lilce1992**- Ashley did need to hear that. Maybe she will do something about it now that she's heard how Spencer feels.

**Anonymous**- I'm glad you are enjoying the story so far.

**I love that there were so many different opinions on the last chapter. Thanks for all of the reviews! I hope you like this chapter!**

I raced home and was surprised to see my mother's car out front along with one I didn't recognize. Great now I have to be polite for company. Fuck it; I'll just go straight to my room.

I walk in the house and hear talking coming from the dining room area.

"Spencer is that you?" I hear my mom call for me. Damn I was so close to the stairs. While rolling my eyes, I make my way to the dining room.

When I get there I see my mom sitting across from some old guy with a big bald spot in the middle of his head and a face that kind of resembles a monkey. I turn to my mother and look at her expectantly.

"Spencer, I'd like you to meet Dr. Taylor." I just stare at the two of them as I try to figure out why I was called in here in the first place.

"Hi Spencer, it's nice to finally meet you. I've heard so much about you." He says standing up and putting his hand out for me to shake. I just look at his hand. I do not like the vibe I am getting off of him.

"Ok is there a reason why I'm here or…" I say directly towards my mother. She scrunches her lips tightly and I know that she does not like how I am acting right now but I could care less.

"As your mother said, my name is Dr. Taylor from Pure Restoration and I am here to help you." The monkey said to me.

"Help me with what?" I say getting slightly defensive.

"With your problem, sweetie. It's not normal." My mom says in a calm voice which makes me mad.

"Not normal?" I ask raising my voice.

"Hey what's going on in here?" My dad comes in the living room looking concerned. "Who are you?" He asks Monkey.

"Hi I'm Dr. Taylor from Pure Restoration and I was-" My dad cuts him off before he can finish.

"Get out of my house, now!" My dad yells and it actually scares me because I can't remember the last time he raised his voice like this.

Monkey a.k.a. Dr. Taylor grabs his things and rushes out of the front door. After the slam of the door my father starts talking again.

"Paula what the hell was that?" He yells once again.

"Well if you didn't cut him off he was going to tell you how he was here to help Spencer and Glen." I guess she thought we would show up at the same time.

"Listen to me Paula because I am not going to say this again." He steps closer to her. "There is nothing wrong with my children. You will not bring any more of these people near them again. Do you understand me?" He says firmly.

"But it-"

"Stop it Paula!" My dad is not holding back tonight. "I'm sick of you making them feel like they are doing something wrong. You can't change who they are, so just stop it." She seems taken back by his words. "If you can't accept them the way they are, then you can just leave because I've had enough of this!"

"Arthur you can't be serious." My dad doesn't respond. Instead he just walks to the front door and holds it open. I can't believe this is happening right now. I never wanted to cause any problems between my parents. My mother walks to my father. "Where in the world do you expect me to go?"

"I don't know, but don't come back unless you bring my wife with you because this" he motions towards her "is not the person I married."

My mother turns to look at me one last time and then towards my dad, then she walks out the door.

"Dad I'm sorry. I didn't mean for all of that to happen." I say once the door closes.

"None of this is your fault. She's just…" He takes a deep breath before he continues. "I'm going to go for a drive." He grabs his keys and right before he walks out the door, he turns to me and says "I love you, Spencer."

"I love you too dad." I give him a small smile.

I go to my room and think about how crazy everything is. First it started out with losing the game, to the argument with Ashley, and now this crazy mess with my family.

I was such a bitch to Ashley but I couldn't keep it anymore. I know it would have been smarter to just talk to her instead of blowing up on her like that but all sense went out the window because of all of the anger that I was holding in.

It sucks being here alone right now. I just need someone, anyone at the moment. And then it hits me.

Ashley has no one. Her dad is never home, and her mom is always taking some vacation for weeks at a time. She has no siblings, and other than Aiden she has no real friends.

"Damn it!" I'm such an ass. Ashley is probably crying at home alone because I was such a selfish bitch. Fuck. I need to go apologize.

After grabbing my keys, I run down the stairs and rush to the door. I swing it open and pause for a second to lock it.

On the drive to her house, I try calling her but she doesn't answer. She is really angry with me, great.

When I pull up to her gate, no one answers so now I am really confused. I try calling again but I got nothing but voicemail. I really wish I had Aiden's number because he might know where she is. I hope he is with Glen because that is my only hope.

A few rings go by and Glen picks up. "Hello?" He yells over the loud music.

"Are you with Ashley or Aiden?" I yell just as loud so he can hear me.

"Yea Ashley's here." Thank goodness.

"And where is here?"

"At Sherri's party." I hang up and start driving towards Sherri's party.

I finally get there and when I walk in the house the smell of alcohol, sweat, and weed hits me hard. Who throws a party on a Wednesday night anyway? There are so many people here so it's hard to find Ashley anywhere.

Finally I spot someone that I know. "Ivy have you seen Ashley?"

"Um I saw her with Jake in the backyard like a few minutes ago." Jake? Who is that? "You know the one on the basketball team." She clarifies.

"Oh thank you."

I walk through the house to the backyard while making as little contact with other people as I can. They are practically fucking as they dance and I am staying away from that shit.

Looking around the backyard, I try to make out any figures I can. It is dark that if it weren't for the talking then I wouldn't think that there was anyone out here.

I am about to give up until I hear Ashley's raspy laugh.

"Ashley?" I call out for her. "Ashley where are you?" She doesn't answer but I hear her laughing. I walk over and see her sitting on a bench with Jake who has his arms around her.

Immediately I get jealous and I would yell if I wanted to cause a scene. I am a little angry because I thought Ashley would be alone crying herself to sleep, but she is at a party all on some guy. I control myself and put my anger to side for a moment, even though Jake is far too close to Ashley for my liking. Besides he doesn't know that we are together, and Ashley has a glazy look on her face so I can tell that she's probably wasted.

"Ashley can I talk to you for a minute?" I say in a calm tone even though on the inside I am screaming because he squeezed her tighter when I walked over here.

"She's busy right now." Jake says and I roll my eyes at him. Was I talking to him?

"Is your name Ashley?" I respond to him and he stays quiet. "I didn't think so." I take both of Ashley's hands and pull her up. She stumbles into me which confirms that she is drunk.

"Spencer, what are you doing here?" She slurs out and the strong poignant smell of alcohol reaches my nose.

"I'm here to take you home." I tell her as I walk her around the house to the front yard.

"I don't want to go home!" She stops dead in her tracks dragging me with her.

"Ashley you are too drunk to stay here, and if you drink anymore you will get sick. Let me just take you home." I say as I try to nudge her to keep walking but she stays rooted in her spot. Gosh why does she have to be a stubborn drunk?

"Why do you even care?"

"Because I care about you Ashley." I tell her sincerely, but she just looks at me not saying anything. "I know what I said earlier and I am really sorry that I hurt you but can you please just let me take you home. I would rather not have this conversation here." She looks at me for a few minutes and I'm afraid that she will say no but she finally nods her head and I smile.

"Ok only because everything keeps moving and I really want to lie down." I laugh and roll my eyes at her. We walk to my car and I open the door for her. "I'm drunk Spencer, not handicapped."

"Sorry but you can barely walk so…" I trail off as I help her into the car. As soon as I closed her door, I rush to my side and hop in.

"Your car is so comfy." She says as she reclines the chair back and rests her head.

"I know right? She's my baby." I say as run my hands across the dashboard. She looks at me and just by looking in her eyes I can tell something is wrong. And now it's quiet. I guess I should do what I drove all the way over here to do. "So Ashley I wanted to apologize for what I said earlier. I didn't mean to take my anger out on you like that; I just didn't know what else to do. I was mad at my mother and upset about the whole bathroom thing with Madison. You were there and you wouldn't give up on finding out what was wrong with me so I did the dumb thing and said some things I shouldn't have. I really hope you can forgive me because I don't want to mess up our relationship when it just started." I finish my speech and look over at Ashley to see her passed out with her mouth wide open. So attractive Ashley, I think to myself. She's lucky I am driving or I would have taken a picture.

Oh well I guess I will just have to tell her in the morning.

I continue my drive to Ashley's house and right when I get there I realize that I have no way of getting in. I try to wake up Ashley but she doesn't budge. I guess she will be staying the night with me tonight.

When I pull away from her house, Ashley starts snoring lightly. She is so cute. About fifteen minutes later, I pull up to my house, and I start lightly shaking Ashley to wake her up.

"Ash." I whisper. "Ashley." I say a little louder. "Babe you have to wake up."

She turns towards me and I think I heard her say "Spencer wait" but my mind must be playing tricks on me.

I try waking her up again but she is really knocked out. I get out of the car and walk over to her side. After carefully opening the door, I lean in and try to think of how I can pick her up.

"Spencer?" I hear from behind me and I jump causing me to hit my head.

"Ouch!" I whisper/yell. Coming out of the car, I turn around to see my dad standing by the door. "Yea dad?"

"What are you doing out here? Do you need help?"

"Can you hold the door open?" He nods and I turn back to Ashley. I put my arms under her body and she immediately rolls over towards me. I slide her out of the car and shut the door with my foot. When I get to the door, my dad gives me a confused look. "She was drunk and she passed out. Can she stay the night?" I ask even though I am already carrying her through the door.

"Yea and who is this?" He asks although I can tell by the slight smile that he already knows who it is.

"This is Ashley." I strain through deep breaths as I reach the stairs. I begin walking up, taking one step at a time. A few minutes later, I make it to my room and I nearly drop her on the bed. She shifts and turns as she tries to get comfortable.

I head back downstairs and my dad is sitting on the couch watching the news. I don't know how he does it, the news is so depressing.

"I'm sorry I just brought her over here. I was going to take her home but I couldn't get in and she is passed out, so I brought her here." I explain.

"It's ok but try not to let it happen again." He says and turns back to the TV. "Oh and I still want to meet her formally." He winks at me.

"Well on that note, I am going to bed. Night dad." I chuckle and kiss him on his cheek.

I change quickly and hop into bed. I roll over to the side that Ashley is laying on and I kiss her cheek. After wrapping the covers more securely around us, I put my arm around Ashley and smile. I love sleeping next to her.

My alarm clock wakes me up way too early. Without opening my eyes, I lazily reach over and shut it off. Wrapping my covers tightly around me again, I snuggle closer to the body next to me. "Five more minutes." I grumble to no one in particular.

I feel shifting in the bed and open my eyes just in time to see Ashley running towards my bathroom. As soon as the door closes, I hear Ashley getting rid of last night's toxins. I shudder at that thought and look at the time to see how much – Oh shit! It's already 9:30. I slept for way longer than five more minutes.

"Do you have an extra toothbrush?" Ashley asks groggily from the bathroom.

"Yea check under the sink." I hop out of bed and head downstairs. I hope no one else is home because I am screwed if they are. When I get downstairs I look around and let out a breath I did not know I was holding when I didn't see anyone. Just to be sure, I checked outside to see if there were any cars, and was relieved to only see mine.

"Are you spying on your neighbors or something?" I hear from behind me. I close the curtain and turn around to see Ashley standing on the bottom step with a slight smile on her face.

Even with slightly dysfunctional hair and mess up make up, she is still the most beautiful girl I've seen.

"You're beautiful." I voice my thoughts. She blushes and looks down.

"Normally I would agree, but right now I look like shit." She chuckles.

"To me you still are as beautiful as ever." I say looking directly into her eyes. "Look Ashley about last night-"

"How about we eat something first before we get into that." I nod and walk in the kitchen. I open the refrigerator and realize that I can't really cook and I would rather not get her sick.

"How do pancakes sound?" I turn around and ask her.

Her eyes light up and she nods. "That sounds delicious."

"I'm glad you think so because IHOP has some great pancakes." I walk passed her as I walk towards the door. But of course I don't get off that lucky, she grabs my hand turns me around.

"Are you telling me that you don't know how to make pancakes?" I duck my head to hide my embarrassment.

"Maybe." I whisper.

"We are changing that right now." She stands up and walks into the kitchen, dragging me along with her. She rummages through the fridge and takes out the ingredients for the pancakes and I get the other things that I am sure she will need.

I can't believe we are actually going to cook. IHOP is not even that far.

"Ok come here." I move over to where she is standing and she moves me so that I am standing directly in front of the counter. "Grab the flour and pour some in the bowl." I pick up the box and start pouring. She puts her hand on top of my and controls the angle of the box so that less comes out. I purposely drop the box and flour goes everywhere.

"Opps" I say while trying to look as innocent as possible. I turn around and she has flour all over her face, and hair and right arm.

"I can't believe you just did that!" She says with a smile. She then wipes the flour off of her arm and right on to me, thus starting a flour fight.

"Say you give." I say to her as I inch closer and closer to her. Right now her back is to the wall and she has nowhere to go. I have the flour box in my hand and a devious smile on my face.

"Never." She says shaking her head. I walk closer and when I get right in front her she looks up at the box that I have hanging in the air over her head.

Suddenly I am being flipped around and now my back is to the wall and the flour box is on the floor. Ashley is looking at me with a smirk

"That's not fair." I pout.

"Aww poor baby, want me to make it better?" She says and I nod. She leans in and I am expecting her to kiss me so I close my eyes. Next thing I know I feel her flour covered hand on my cheek. I open my eyes and glare at her. How dare she use a kiss to trick me? I take my Ashley kisses seriously.

After cleaning up the flour mess we get back to cooking, which meant her standing behind giving me step by step directions.

Having her so close to me and her breath right on my ear does crazy things to me. I am not even concentrating on what she is saying but whenever she talks, I inwardly shiver. Every ingredient we added caused me to get more and more turned on. And the worst part of it all is that she has no idea what she is doing to me.

I keep taking deep breaths because that's the only thing that stops me from just dropping everything and turning around to attack her.

After we finish cooking the pancakes with a side of eggs, we sit down to eat.

"Thanks for the unwanted cooking lesson." I tease.

"I can't have my girlfriend not knowing how to cook, now can I?" I still love it when she calls me her girlfriend. I was afraid that after last night she wouldn't want to be with me anymore.

"Sure you can, you will just have to cook for me." I grin and she rolls her eyes.

"You are probably right because you could get me to do just about anything for you." I smile triumphantly. "Like right now I am going to generously help clean syrup off of your lip." She leans over and brings her face closer and closer to mine.

At this point, I think I've stopped breathing in anticipation. Gradually and torturously she slides her tongue across my bottom lip. Of course a moan slips from me, which is a good thing because at least I am breathing now. She bites my bottom lip and pulls on it as she moves back. I'm sure my eyes have glazed over long ago. I don't think I can get any more turned on than I am now.

Unfortunately I spoke to soon because now she is slowly dragging her tongue across her lips with her eyes closed. "Yum" She says like it was the best thing she ever tasted. I bet I can give her something that tastes even better. Oh gosh, me being turned on leads to very bad thoughts.

She opens her eyes and winks at me. I jump and quickly turn back to my food pretending like I am not at all affected by her little show. The uncomfortable feeling in my panties is clearly telling me otherwise.

After breakfast we take showers, separately of course, and get dressed. My shower ran a little long because I couldn't get Ashley's little performance out of my head. I let her have my room while I used the bathroom in the hall. When I walk in, she's sitting on my bed looking through her phone.

"Aww you look so cute in my clothes." I say as I walk in my room and she jumps.

"Way to scare a person" She laughs while holding her chest and then looks down at the clothes she was wearing. "I love wearing them. It's like I'm surrounded by you and your scent." She lifts the shirt to her nose and inhales deeply.

I laugh at her and take a seat next to her. "You're cute." And once again she blushes. I don't think I've ever seen her blush this much.

It gets quiet and I feel like right now is the best time to talk about what happened last night.

"Ashley I…" how do I start this? "Last night I..." She looks at me and waits for me to say something. "I'm really sorry." I finally get out.

"I know Spencer. I understand where you were coming from, but you really hurt me. I told you to come to me whenever you needed to talk. I meant anytime and anywhere." She sits up and turns towards me. We are now sitting on my bed facing each other.

"I know, but I am not use to talking to people about my feelings Ashley. I usually just write them down and move on. I'm sorry for not coming to you, and it will take me some to remember that you are there for me." I take her hand in mine. "I was just so upset with you and Madison and then everything that happened with my mom just took me over the edge."

"I'm sorry that your mom can't accept you. She will, just give her some time. She loves you, I mean it's hard not to." She squeezes my hand. "And with Madison…it's complicated. I told her that so she would get off of my back about you." She sighs and gets off the bed and walks to the other side where I'm sitting. "It really hurt when you said that you thought I didn't care about you. Spencer you mean so much to me. I wish I could truly explain it to you. I've been with so many girls and none of them even compare. Every time I'm around you, my heart starts beating a little faster. Whenever we kiss anything and everyone around me just disappears because the only thing that matters in that moment is you. When I see you smile I can't help but smile even if I may be in a bad mood." She pauses and takes a deep breath. "I've never felt these things about anyone. So please don't ever question how I feel about you, ever." She finishes with so much conviction, that it makes me believe every word she just said.

I hug her and she leans into the embrace.

"I'm really sorry for hurting you. I was just letting my insecurities get the best of me and said some stupid things." I hold her hands in mine. "I didn't mean any of them I was speaking out of anger. I know that this lame apology won't fix anything but I will make it up to you I promise. I'm just so glad that you didn't decide to break up with me." I let out a breath and smile at her.

"You thought I was going to break up with you?" she seems surprised.

"Well yea I said some horrible things and then I just left."

"But then you came back. You came and saved me from Jake who probably would have slipped me some drug because I was too wasted to think straight." I laugh at her and she continues. "But I knew that you were angry and I knew that you needed some time to think straight. Besides it's going to take a little more than some yelling to get rid of me. I like you too much to leave that easily." She chuckles.

I pull her down in my lap. "You're amazing. You know that right?" I say looking into her beautiful brown eyes. She blushes yet again and attempts to hide her face but I turn her face towards me and lightly kiss her.

Damn I've missed her lips.


	29. Chapter 29

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"As much as I love when you come to visit me, I'm going to need you to stop bringing my homework with you." Chelsea says as she sees me put her homework on her side table.

Laughing, I take my seat in a car next to her bed. "You'll get over it." She rolls her eyes at me. "Anyway how are you feeling today?"

"Better than yesterday. I want to get out of this bed and out of this damn hospital." She sounds frustrated. I guess I would be to if I were on bed rest.

"You will be out next week and then you can see Carmen!" I try to cheer her up a little.

"Yea I know. I really miss her." Her eyes are brimmed with tears, but before they can fall she quickly wipes them away. "Oh so Glen brought over the tape of yesterday's game. What was up with you Spencer? Just by looking at you, I could tell that something wasn't right." Ok so one, Chelsea is great at avoiding things. If she doesn't want to talk about something, usually her feelings, she will easily change the subject. And two, how the hell did she know that something was wrong through a video?

"I just had an off game." I shrug.

"Spencer…" She says in that tone. You know that 'I'm not falling for your bullshit' tone.

"Ok well my mom is really taking me being a lesbian harder than I thought. That day I was already upset about something that happened with Ashley, and when I looked in the stands right before the game started only to see my dad sitting alone, I just couldn't handle it."

"Paula might not like it, but she will have to get over it because it's just who you are. She will come around eventually, Spence."

I scoff. "Yea right! The reason why she wasn't at the game was because she was meeting with some monkey looking guy who thought he could 'change my ways'" I say using air quotes.

"She didn't!" She looks at me in shock.

"Oh but she did. Thank goodness my dad got there in time to save me." My smile quickly fades. "But Chels, he kicked my mom out and it's my fault. I feel like I am ruining their marriage and destroying our family."

"Spencer, come here." She moves over on her bed and winces as she does so. I move over and sit on the edge of the bed. "Look at me." I look at her and her face is completely serious. This is rare for Chelsea. "None of that is your fault. Your dad saw that your mom couldn't handle who you were so he is giving her some time to realize what she is doing to you. She will come around, I promise." I hug her gently and she pats my back. I needed to hear that. Walking around with that guilt was not pleasant. "I'm sure Ashley told you the same thing so you didn't really need to hear it again, but I hate seeing you so upset about something you have no control of."

"Actually she doesn't know about anything that happened last night." I say as I pull back from the hug.

"And why not?"

"I just didn't have time or the right moment I guess." She sighs. "After my dad kicked my mom out, he left. I didn't want to be alone so I went looking for Ashley. When I found her she was drunk at Sherri's party, so I took her to my house for the night. This morning we were having a good time, we made up, cooked breakfast together, watched a few movies, and then I took her home right before I came here because she had a practice session with Ivy." I say all in one breath.

"What was your argument about?"

"What argument?" I say playing dumb.

"You said that you made up, so…." She trails and motions her hand for me to continue.

"I may have taken out all of my anger out on her after we lost the game."

"Why?" I roll my eyes. Chelsea always makes me talk about things that she knows I don't want to talk about.

"Because she was trying to figure out why I was ignoring her and I wouldn't tell her. And before you ask, I was ignoring her because I was upset about her telling Madison I didn't mean anything to her." I tell her.

"Why didn't you just tell her that instead of ignoring her and making the situation worse?"

"Chelsea you know how I am when it comes to talking to people about my feelings, I don't."

"I know and if you want your relationship with Ashley to work, you will have to start being more open with her. Spencer keeping your emotions inside all of the time is not good. Ashley is going to want to help you if she thinks something's wrong with you and you have to let her." Why does she have to be right all of the time? "I'm guessing that you just let all of your emotions build up and then you took your anger out on her because she was being persistent when she was trying to figure out why you were mad at her. Am I right?"

"That's freaky. I don't know how you did that, but that's really freaky." I say as I stand up and start pacing the floor. "Chels, I want to be like an open book with Ashley, but I am honestly afraid. I don't want to get hurt by her. When we first started talking, she said she didn't do relationships and that just hooking with random girls was easier for her." I stop pacing and take a seat in the chair next to bed. "I want to know that I actually mean something to her and that I'm not just some other girl to her." I look over at Chelsea. "Now how do I tell her that without completely ruining our relationship?"

"Maybe you can show her instead of telling her." I give her a confused look. "I mean there must be a reason why she liked randomly hooking up with girls. Maybe she feels the same way you do. She's afraid to give all of herself to you because she wants to know that you are in this for real. And I know you haven't told her because once again, you aren't exactly open with your feelings."

Once again, I am shut down by the wise words of Chelsea Lewis.

My phone vibrates just as I go to reply. 'Only 2 hours until I get to see your beautiful face again.'

I smile and send her a text.

"Tell Ashley I said hi." Chelsea teases from her bed. She can probably tell that it's Ashley by the huge smile on my face, but I don't care.

"Well since you like teasing me I am leaving." I stand up and walk to the door then pretend like I will just walk out but Chelsea's voice stops me.

"I was kidding Spence!" She says weakly. I think she is about to pass out soon. "I really like seeing you happy."

"I know but I have to go get ready for my date tonight and you need to get some rest." I walk over to her and kiss her forehead.

"A date?"

"Yup Ashley's picking me up at seven and I have no idea where we are going."

"And I bet that's bugging you."

"You have no idea."

Sometime later I find myself standing in my closet wrapped in my towel. I have no idea what to wear. I remember she said to dress casually, like I would if I were going to a coffee shop. I don't go to coffee shops! I let out a frustrated sigh as I leave the closet and flop down on my bed. Getting dressed should not be this hard.

"Hey Spence I…oh sorry." I tighten the towel around me a little more. "Sorry I didn't know you would still be getting dressed. I heard your shower running a while ago so I thought you'd be dressed by now." Glen says from my door.

"Yea I should be dressed she's going to be here in about forty five minutes; I just can't find anything to wear."

"What's the occasion?" He comes and walks through my closet.

"I have a date with Ashley but I don't know where we are going. All I know is that I have to dress casually, like I would if I were going to a coffee shop." I repeat yet again.

He doesn't reply, Glen just flips through my clothes and five minutes later he comes out holding a light blue V-neck and a black mini skirt.

"Ok wear that with some flats, a little make up, and put your hair down and add some light curls." I just stare at him with my mouth open. "Spencer chop chop, you don't have that much time and you still have a lot of work to do."

After he left my room and closed the door, I am still standing there dumbfounded. What the hell just happened?

Glancing at my alarm clock, I realize that I have no time to stand around because I only have a half hour to get ready.

As I start applying my makeup, I hear the doorbell go off. Shit I am running late. I quickly finish off my makeup, throw my shoes on and grab my bag. I practically run down the stairs only to see Ashley sitting on the couch across from my dad. Oh no, why couldn't Glen answer the door?

"Hey Ashley, are you ready to go? Good come on!" I grab her arm and start towards the door.

"Spencer wait!" So close, my hand is right on the door knob. I turn around and my dad is standing up next to the couch he was sitting on with his arms folded across his chest.

"Yes dad?" My innocence comes in to play.

"I was talking to Ashley. I would like to know the girl that my daughter is dating if you don't mind." But what if I do?

"Ugh fine, but I don't like this." I pout and begin walking towards the couches again.

"Oh wait" Ashley stops me by pulling on my hand. "I bought these for you. I thought you'd like them." She holds up a bouquet of flowers and I swear my heart melts.

I didn't even notice that she had anything in her hand. Come to think of it, I was in such a rush to get her from talking to my dad that I did not even get to get a good look at her at all. Using this as my chance, I notice that she has on tight jeans and green top that hugs her abs perfectly. I unconsciously lick my lips as my eyes rake over her body.

Then I realize that she is still holding the flowers out and probably thinks I don't like them by my lack of response.

"Thank you so much, I love them!" I take the flowers and wrap her up in a hug. It's been about four hours since I saw her last but I've missed her so much. I've missed her touch, her smell, her smile, just her presence.

I guess the hug lasted a bit too long because my dad had to clear his throat to get us to stop.

"Sorry, I'm just going to go put these in some water." I start to walk away but then I stop and look at my dad. "Don't scare her away please. I don't want her to run off scared. I actually like her, a lot." I look over at Ashley and she is giving me a big smile. I really want to kiss her right now. That's another thing I miss, her lips. I settle for what I can get and give her a kiss on her cheek. "I'll be back."

After finding a vase and setting the flowers down in my room, I return to the living room to find my dad and Ashley laughing. I wonder what's so funny.

"Ok well I think we should get going. You know we can't be late to…where are we going?" I ask Ashley. She looks at me and smiles.

"Well it was nice to meet you Mr. Carlin, formally this time. I'm sorry that our first meeting wasn't this pleasant." I cannot believe that my girlfriend is the one that just said that. Is this the same Ashley or does she have a twin sister that I never knew about?

"It was nice meeting you too Ashley. You are welcome to come back anytime." My dad's friendly smile makes me smile.

As soon as we are seated in Ashley's hot ass car. I'm really bad with cars so I have no idea what kind it is. All I can tell you is that it is a small black shiny two seat car.

"I love your car!"

"I knew you would. It's how I get all of the hot chicks." She winks at me. I scoff and open the car door. "Spence I'm kidding. You're the only hot chick I want."

"You're lucky that I really want to know what you have planned for tonight because I would have been out of this car." I pout and cross my arms over my chest, pretending to still be angry.

"What do I have to do to make you not mad at me?" I look at her and shrug. "Well how about this?" Suddenly she's leaning closer to me and her lips are on mine before I can even object, not that I would have. I finally get smart enough to stop thinking and to start responding. Her lips are so warm, soft, and addicting. After kissing her, I never want to kiss anyone else.

"Are you still mad?" Ashley's raspy voice breaks me from my Ashley spell.

"Took you long enough." I smile. "Do you know how long I've been waiting for you to do that?" I ask as she pulls out of my driveway.

"I'm sorry babe, I wanted to kiss you as soon as I saw you but I didn't think it would be right to kiss you in front of your dad." Aww she is so considerate. "I really like your dad by the way. So far he seems a lot nicer than your mom."

"Yea he's great. Sometimes I wonder why he is even with her. He deserves better." I mumble and look out the window. I would rather not think about Paula tonight.

"Well I'm glad that he and your mom found each other." My head snap towards Ashley. Why would she say that? I mean she knows about the devil's spawn Paula. "I know you think I'm crazy but if they hadn't met then you wouldn't be here." Taking one of her hands off of the wheel, she grabs my hand and laces her fingers with mine. I smile at the gesture.

"Thank you." I say after a few minutes.

"For what?" She puts the car in park and looks over at me.

"For being you." A blush makes its way across her face and to me it's the cutest thing ever. I lean over and give her a peck on her lips and then I hop out of the car. I look around but I have never been in this area so everything looks so unfamiliar to me. "Where are we Ash?" I feel her hand slip in to mine.

"This is Java." Blank stare. "It's a coffee shop."

"You want to get coffee?" Why couldn't she just tell me that before? What's the big deal about going to a coffee shop?

She laughs and shakes her head. "You're so cute, come on." I follow her lead as she pulls me into the direction of the Java, the coffee shop. I still don't know why we had to come here for coffee. Starbucks is right down the street from me!

We walk into Java. The inside is dark and it is pretty crowded in here. There is a small stage with a microphone where all of the chairs are facing. Ashley walks me to a table near the back, in a dark corner with not many other tables around.

The place is nice, but I am still unsure as to why we are here. Maybe they have like the world's best coffee or something. A server comes up to us and we order some of their great coffee.

More people fill in the empty tables and the server returns with our coffees. Ok here it goes, I am about to drink the world's best coffee.

I take a sip. Ok what the hell this tastes like regular coffee.

"Ash why-" I am cut off by someone speaking through the microphone. I look towards the voice and notice a guy that seems to be about my age standing on stage talking through the microphone.

"I'm glad to see everyone here for one of our Thursday Poetry Nights. For those of you that have never been here before. Our poetry nights are not like other places. Here we choose from the crowd. There is no pre-scheduled list of performers. If you have something to say, you are more than welcome to come up on stage. Now that that's over with, let's begin. Do I have any takers?" A girl in the front row volunteers to start the show.

I turn my attention to Ashley. I can't believe we are here. I've always wanted to go to a live poetry night somewhere, but I've never told anyone that so I have no idea how she knows that.

"Ashley how…how'd you know?" My eyes are starting to get a bit misty. Her bringing me here is a small gesture but it means so much.

She shrugs. "I don't know. I know how much you like to write poems and just your thoughts. I thought you might enjoy this place."

I stand up from my seat and go towards her. Wrapping her up in my arms I whisper in her ear "Thank you. I lo…I'm really happy you brought me here." I kiss her cheek then go back to my seat.

I'm praying silently to myself; I really hope she didn't catch that slip up.

The clapping around me makes me realize that there are more people here. When I'm with Ashley I always get lost. She makes it feel like it's only us here. I put my hand over hers and squeeze it. I don't plan on letting go until I have to.

The enthralling poets capture my interest and I feel as though I am hypnotized. I hang on to their every word, feeling their emotions. Halfway through the show I had silent tears rolling down my face. Ashley wiped them away whenever she saw them and I had to tell her more than once that I was fine, I just really enjoyed the poets.

A few performances and coffees later, I was in a happier mood and still holding on to Ashley's hand. There were less emotional poems and more comical ones.

The host came back on stage and I was ready for more even though we've been here for close to two hours.

"How is everyone doing?" Everyone claps including me which meant I had to let go of Ashley's hand. "I'm glad everyone has been enjoying themselves. Unfortunately our time is running out and we only have time for one more performer. Is there one last brave sole in the audience tonight?" He pauses and waits for someone to walk up there or to say something. I look around and see everyone else looking around. My gaze stops on Ashley. My amazing girlfriend, and although I've only had one girlfriend, I'm pretty sure she is the best girlfriend ever. She has to be. No other girl or person for that matter can make me feel beautiful, wanted, sexy, appreciated, happy, and just alive. In the time that I've known her she has done all of that for me and I feel like I've given her nothing in return. And it's time that I take Chelsea's advice. I need to show her how I feel, how she makes me feel. "There's not one person in here that needs to get something off their chest at all?" And there's my cue.

"I do!" I yell and get out of my seat. I don't bother looking at Ashley because I am sure that she is confused right now, and I don't want anything to hold me back from my sudden braveness. Walking up the steps to the stage, I can feel my heart pounding in my chest. There is no backing out now. By the time I reach the microphone, the host is already off the stage so it's just me, the mic, and this bright light shining on me. Looking out into the crowd really makes me nauseous so I settle on the one thing that is making this all possible, Ashley. My eyes find hers even through the darkness of the club. "I wrote this for my wonderful girlfriend who has made me happier than I ever remember." I wink at Ashley and she blushes. Reciting the poem in my head that I've somehow memorized over the past few days, I take a deep breath and begin to pour my heart out.

"_You are always on my mind,  
>But I try to leave those thoughts behind.<br>I'm so happy that I met you.  
>It's a blessing, but a curse too.<em>

_It all started with a simple hi.  
>And after each conversation, I never wanted to say bye.<br>It was like you put me under your spell.  
>You pulled me in, and I nearly fell. <em>

_Every day my feelings grew.  
>Somehow I kept it inside, and no one had a clue.<br>I really wanted to let you know.  
>But I was afraid to put my heart up for show.<em>

_Our chats ended in the wee hours of the morning.  
>In all of that time, I spent longing.<br>I wanted to call you mine.  
>Each time I saw your eyes shine.<em>

_Finally the day is here  
>I can hold your hand without a care.<br>Without you I'm hopeless and blue  
>But now my dreams are coming true." <em>

My eyes never left Ashley. She gave me the strength to stand up here and express my feelings for her. "Thank you" I whisper into the microphone and before I leave the stage I hear the applause of entire audience. A blush finds my cheeks and I walk faster towards Ashley. When I get there I am lifted off of my feet and held in Ashley's arms.

"That was unbelievable. I-I don't even know what to say. I'm actually speechless." Her lips roam all over my face. She finally puts me down on my feet.

"So I'm guessing you liked it?" I laugh and grab my bag. Putting my hand in hers we leave the coffee shop.

"Liked it? That's far from an understatement. I loved it! It made me feel so…so…I don't even know how to describe it." Who knew that this would be the reaction I would get? I surely didn't.

"Well it was written specifically for you so I'm glad you loved it." I giggle and get into her hot ass car.

"There's only one way to show you how I feel." My face is gently caressed and pulled into hers. My lips meet hers in one of the most passionate kisses I have ever experienced to this day. I have no choice but to moan into the kiss. Our tongues meet and slowly dance in our mouths. Even at this angle, there are not enough words in the dictionary to describe this kiss.

"Wow that's a great way to end a good night." I say as she starts driving.

"Who said the night is ending?" Ashley smirks at me.

"Oh so there's more? I guess you are just full of surprises then."

About twenty minutes later, we are coming close to the school. Why are we here? Instead of working my brain into over drive, I decide to just see what she has planned. I have learned my lesson last time.

She drives past the school and parks near the playground. She gets out of the car and once again I am following her lead. I notice that she is walking straight to the oak tree, the same oak tree where we had our first full in person conversation.

There is a picnic basic on a blanket right under that famous tree. I stop dead in my tracks when I see this. The surprises really never end with her.

"I hope you like picnics." She smiles nervously and takes a seat on the blanket. I sit on the other side of the picnic basket and grin at her.

"I do. When I was little, I remember going to the pier with my family every weekend during the summer. We would have a picnic, fly kites, then get ice cream. I always looked forward to the summers just for those weekends." I smile as the memory clouds my mind.

"I wish I had memories like that to reminisce on." Ashley says sadly. "At least one of us didn't have a completely fucked up childhood." She laughs bitterly.

"I'm sorry Ash."

"You have nothing to be sorry for. It's not your fault at all." She looks up at star lit sky.

"I know but I hate that you had to go through all of that. I wish I could have been there for you." I tell her sincerely.

"Well you are here now and that's all that matters, right?" I nod and give her a small smile.

She puts a sandwich and some chips on our plates and we begin to eat as we look out into the dark night.

"I still can't believe you stood up in front of that entire crowd and just shared your heart with me. I don't think I will ever get over that." Ashley breaks the silence. "What made you do it? I would have thought you'd be too shy to do anything like that. You aren't one for expressing your feelings like that." She laughs and I laugh with her. I sit up and look at her seriously.

"I did it because you have been nothing less than great to me and I wanted you to know how I felt. I wanted you to know that I'm like a different person with you, like I'm a new me, or the real me." I have to do this now. It's now or never. "I wanted you to know that…" I swallow hard. "That I love you." Her eyes widen in surprise. "I do Ashley and I've never been more sure of anything in my life. I love you so much Ashley and it scares me because I've never been in love before. I don't know how this works or what I'm supposed to do. The only thing that I know for sure is that I love you."

It's silent. She hasn't said anything at all. What if she runs? What if I've scared her off?

"I'm afraid." I look at her. I don't think I've ever heard her voice so small and vulnerable. "I-I've built up these walls to protect myself from everyone." She picks at the grass around the blanket. "I've always had people come in and out of my life. No one has ever stayed long enough to show me that they actually truly cared. Before I was a cheerleader, I was a loner. I had no one. I had no one to turn to when I wanted to talk. I had no one to go to when I just wanted to hang out and have fun. I was always alone with no one to turn to or depend on. My mom was always gone and my father has always put his work before his family. Before Aiden, the only friend I had was the chef that taught me how to cook and like many of my nannies, he was gone after a while. Aiden was the only person to come in my life and stay. But there's still this part of me that's saying that he will leave any day now. That I'm not worth it." She roughly wipes some fallen tears on her cheeks. I am one tear away from running over to her and hugging the life out of her, but I know that she needs to finish. This has obviously been bugging her for a while. "I joined the cheerleading squad because I thought that I would be less lonely and I would find some friends that will actually stay. I would finally have people I could turn to when I wanted to talk or people that actually wanted to be around me. That's how I met Aiden. I was the new cheerleader and he was the star of the boys' basketball team. We started dating and we realized that we were really wrong for each other and better off as friends. One day I told him about my interest in girls and he went with me to a gay club, which was the same night I found out about his male obsession." She chuckles. "Anyway we came up with the plan to keep up the front as a happy popular couple because it was much easier that way. I wasn't ready to give up the friends and popularity to go back to being the loner who had no one." My arms are around her and she cries softly into my shoulder.

"Ashley I didn't know you felt that way. I'm so sorry." I kiss her forehead and rub her back.

"I just thought I should tell you why it was so hard for me to come out. You shared a piece of you, so it was only right that I did too."

"Ashley you are so worth it." She looks at me disbelievingly. "I'm so happy that you were able to trust me enough to tell me this. I wish I could change the past or find some way to show you just how worth it you are. I love you Ashley and I am not going anywhere. I will stick around to prove to you that there are still people in this world that care for you."

"That's why I told you." She sniffs and continues. "You always seem to be there when I need you. You always seem to want to make me happy. I've never had anyone in my life do that. Aiden is just my friend, but he has never stood up in front of anyone just to show me how much I meant to him. And I love you for that. Even though, I know that sharing your personal writings is not something you normally do, you did it for me. You proved to me how much you care and that you would conquer your own fears and insecurities just to show me."

She just said she loved me. I don't even know what to say or what to do. I didn't expect her to say it back, but she did and I couldn't be happier.

"I wouldn't have been able to do that if you weren't there. As soon as I got on that stage I felt like throwing up but then I saw your face and I just…starting talking." I run my fingers slowly up and down her arm. "When I realized where we were and why we were there…something hit me. Something inside me said, I don't think I could love this girl any more than I do now." I pause. "But then I realized that after you let me in and after you were able to show me this other side of you, I love you so much more now." It feels so good to get this off of my chest, like a weight has been lifted off of my shoulders.

"I'm happy that we met. I never thought that a cheesy line would lead me such an amazing person." I laugh thinking about the stupid line that started all of this. _'__**LAbabe4u:**__ On a scale from Lindsey Lohan to Ellen DeGeneres, how gay do you think you are?'_ She sits up from my arms and looks at me. "I love you Spencer."

"I love you too Ashley."

I lean forward and gently press my lips against hers. Now this kiss is the most passionate, blissful, powerful, most amazing kiss I have ever had.

**So this is the end. I will post an epilogue. Thank you for reading the story, I hope you all enjoyed it. **

**Reviews are more than welcome.**


	30. Chapter 30

_**I finally finished the epilogue, yay! Okay first off, I am doped up on Benadryl so this Author's note may or may not make sense. **_

_**Thank you all for reading my story. I have really enjoyed writing it. A special thank you to those that reviewed, story alerted, favorited this story. And thanks to those that have add me to your favorite authors and author alerted me as well. **_

_**As far as new stories go I have no idea if I will write another story because as of now I have no good story lines that are sticking. I may or may not write more one shots. **_

_**Thank you to the people that have been my betas at one point or another – Becca, Sparks, and Houston. **_

_**With that said, I hope you enjoy.**_

"_What did you want to talk about?" I say coldly._

_She sits next to me on the bed. "I-I I'm sorry."_

_I laugh bitterly. "What exactly are you sorry for? Are you sorry for just running out of my house without saying goodbye? Are you sorry for ignoring me for a week? Or are you sorry for just standing there while you bitchy friend insults me? Which one exactly are you sorry for?" I say angrily._

"_All of them. I promise that if you give me a minute to explain, you will understand why I did all of those things. At least I hope you will." She says sadly._

"_I'm not sure if I want to hear what you have to say Ashley." I say and get up to leave. She grabs my arm and turns me around quickly. "I sai-" I get cut off by her lips on mine. _

_I am so shocked that I don't do anything at first. Then I thought, Ashley is fucking kissing me why am I not kissing her back? I start moving my lips along with hers and she moans. I swear my legs almost gave out on me when I heard her moan. Now this is really turning me on. _

_I'm feeling everything I wanted to feel when I kissed Kendra. The warmth, sparks, tingles, butterflies, everything was right here in Ashley's kiss. _

_Then I remember that she's with Aiden and I am still mad at her. As much as I hate to do it, I push her back._

_I instantly miss her lips on mine, but we need to talk. _

"_W-why did you do that?" I manage to get out. "You're with Aiden and you ignored me for a week. Why?" I look at her, pleading with her to answer me because I am really confused. _

"_Spencer I need to tell you something and I am not sure how you will react." She says taking a step back._

"_What could be so important that it makes you want to kiss me? What makes you want to cheat on your boyfriend? What makes you look the other way when your friends attack me? What could be so damn important that you ignore me for a fucking week?" I yell at her. _

"_You want to know what made me do all of that?" She yells back._

"_Yes please enlighten me because right now, I have no fucking idea!"_

"_I'm Gayle! The girl you have been talking to online, is me! There I said it! Are you happy now?" She screams and I open my mouth to yell again but close it again when her words register in my head. What did she just say?_

I wipe the tear from my eye and close the book. I look out into the audience as they clap enthusiastically. I look out in the crowd and send them a friendly smile. My smile fades when I realize that she isn't here. It's not like I was expecting her to be here anyway.

"Thank you for coming out today. I am really happy that this book was finally published. I have worked really hard on it and I hope that you all enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed writing it." I look over to the side and signal to my publicist that I am done. Kendra walks over and I move away from the microphone.

The last time I stood in front of a microphone and spoke in front of a large group of people was when I recited that poem to Ashley at Java. To this day, that night was one of the best nights of my life. I get so lost in the memory that I didn't hear Kendra talking to the crowd.

She walks over to me and moves me towards a table that's filled with copies of my book.

"All you have to do is sign some books and pose for a few pictures and then we can leave." Kendra says and I take my seat at the table. I pick up a marker and get ready to write.

"Hi" I look up at the first person in line. She looks like she is about seventeen years old. She silently slides her book on the table.

"Hi" She whispers so low I barely heard her.

"And who am I making this out to?" I give her a smile in hopes that it loosens her up a little.

"Emily" She says again in a whisper. I start writing a little message on the first page of the book. "Um Ms. Carlin?"

"You can call me Spencer, Ms. Carlin makes me sound old." I laugh.

She laughs nervously. "Ok Spencer, do you have any advice on coming out to your parents?" I'm a little shocked by the question but it's expected.

"As you read in the book, I didn't really have a choice. I was kind of caught making out with my girlfriend." I smile sheepishly and Emily smiles and nods. "But I was able to come out to my dad because we had a close relationship and I knew that he would love me either way. My mom on the other hand wasn't so pleasant, but she eventually came around." She seemed a little relieved but still a little hesitant. "Trust me, Emily you will know when the time is right. But remember that you only get one chance."

"Thank you Spencer." I write an extra message and told her to email me from my fan website whenever she needs to.

After what feels like hundreds of books, my hand starts to hurt.

"Can I take a break?" I massage my hand as I look towards Kendra waiting for my answer.

"There are only about five people left and then we can go." She gives me a thumbs up and I roll my eyes at her. Five more people my ass.

I start a countdown in my head and I'm sure my smiles look even more forced than before. When I get to one I let out a sigh of relief and stand up.

I turn to Kendra and just as I go to speak I hear someone slam their book on the table. She said five more, not six. I know I'm being bitchy but my damn hand hurts.

"Do you have time for just one more?" I hear a voice say from behind me.

"She just needs a little break and then she can sign your book." Kendra says for me and I give her a thankful smile.

"Would you do it now for Gayle?" I whip me head around as fast as I could as soon as I heard him say Gayle.

"What?"

"I said is this book on sale?" Now I'm starting to hear things, I've been here way too long.

I quickly sign his book and slightly shove it in his direction. "It's free for you." I turn to Kendra. "Can we please leave now? I want to get home."

"Yep let's go." She replies and I breathe a sigh of relief. After saying our goodbyes to the store owner, we quickly make our way to the car out front. The driver is already there holding the door open for us.

"Thanks Charles." I slide into the back seat and Kendra slides in next to me.

"Ok so you have two hours at home then you have to be at the gallery at 5." Kendra informs me as she looks through her phone. She's always on top of things, which is why she is my publicist/personal assistant.

"Only two hours?" I ask incredulously. "That's not nearly enough to spend with her."

"I know but you agreed to go to gallery opening a long time ago." She reminds me.

"I know, I know. I just miss her." I lean my head against the window.

When we pull up to the house, a big smile spreads across my face. As soon as Charles stops the car, I run out of the car and race to the door. I unlock the front door as fast as I could.

"Hey Spencer how was the book reading?"

"It was good. My hand is still sore from signing so many books, but it was fun." I smile. "Where is she?"

"She's with your mom upstairs." I give my dad a kiss on the cheek and race upstairs to my old bedroom.

I open the door and see them sitting on the bed watching SpongeBob, I've taught her well. I love witnessing moments like this.

"Mommy!" Her brown locks bounce up and down as she runs to me as fast as her little legs can take her.

I pick her up and squeeze her tightly against me.

"I've missed you so much!" I kiss her all over her face and she giggles. "Hey mom, thanks for watching Sophia for me." I smile at my mother.

"It was no problem at all. I wish she were here more often." My mom gets up off of the bed, walks towards me and kisses me on my forehead before wiping off the smeared lipstick.

She has done that every time she saw me for the past ten years. I think she still feels guilty for the way she treated me when she first found out that I was a lesbian. She left for a week before she came back apologizing profusely and begging to have her family back. It took a while to let her back in but she's my mother and as much as I hated to admit, I wanted her in my life.

"It's still ok if she stays here while I go to the gallery, right?" I follow her out of the room and downstairs.

"No problem Spence, what time will you be back?"

"I think it's over at eight or nine, so I should be back no later than ten."

"Ok Sophia will be passed out by then so it's not a problem."

"Thanks mom."

"Kenna!" Sophia wiggles out of my arms so that she can get down and run to Kendra who was sitting on the couch talking to my dad. At the tender age of two, Sophia's pronunciation is clearly not the greatest.

I take a seat on the other couch next to my mom and watch them interact with each other. I'm glad Sophia likes Kendra because she has been a big part in her life.

After a few minutes after playing with Kendra, Sophia comes back to me and sits herself on my lap. I haven't been able to spend much time with her since I've finished the book and had it published. I hate it, but soon the hype will die down and I'll be able to spend a lot more time at home with her.

"Momma?" Sophia points at something across the room. I take a closer look and notice that it's a picture from me and Ashley's wedding. I didn't know that that was still there.

"Yes baby girl, that's Momma." I whisper to her although every other person in the room is paying attention to us.

"Momma." She pats the seat next to me.

"No Sophia, Momma isn't here." She looks up at me with those big blue eyes which are starting to fill with sadness.

"No Momma?" I can feel my own tears starting to build up.

"Sophia how about we get a snack from the kitchen?" My mom says and takes Sophia from my lap and I send her a thankful smile. I need a little air.

"Cookies?" Sophia squeals and I giggle. She loves Oreos.

I get up from my seat and make my way to the door. As I open it, a nice breeze hits my face and I sigh. I miss Ashley so much and I hate that she's not here right now.

Looking at that wedding picture reminded me of my life with Ashley.

During high school, I was recruited to play basketball at the University of Southern California. Ashley wanted to follow me there but the University of California Los Angeles had a better music program. Ashley wanted to study music and business because she had high hopes of owning her own record label one day.

I convinced her to go to UCLA instead of following me to USC. We were only going to be about a half hour apart. She said she'd go to UCLA on one condition, if we get an apartment together. I gave in and we found an apartment that was in between both of the colleges.

I knew that I wouldn't play basketball for the rest of my life and I had a passion for writing so at USC I majored in creative writing and journalism while I played basketball.

"Hey, are you ok?" I turn to see that Kendra followed me outside.

Kendra played basketball at USC with me and majored in Mass Communications. Ivy went to UCLA with Ashley and majored in Dance.

I didn't realize I was crying until she wiped away a few of my tears. "Hey no crying. You have to be strong for that little girl in there." She points to the door and I nod silently.

I know I have to be strong for her, it's just so hard. I didn't think her being gone would hurt so much.

After college, I got a job at the L.A. Times and Ashley worked at her Dad's record label. Kendra also worked at Ashley's dad's record label representing some of the artists. She offered to work for me once I told her about my book and I was glad to have someone I trusted to work for me. Ivy was able get a dance teacher job at a dance studio.

I walk back in the house and find Sophia in the kitchen. After her snack, she pulled me upstairs to play with some of her toys.

A year after college, I proposed to Ashley. Some people thought it was too soon but we had been together for five years and I knew she was it for me. I thought the best day of my life was when we finally said I do.

I was wrong. The best day of my life was when Sophia was born. During this time, I was still working at the L.A. Times. I had my own advice column with a loyal set of readers. Ashley was moving up in her dad's company, but was making plans for her own record label.

"Spencer it's time to go." Kendra says from the door.

"Bye Kenna!" Sophia squeals as she run towards her. Kids have so much energy.

"Bye sweetie." She hugs her and kisses her forehead. "I'll be in the car." She says looking at me and I nod at her.

I stand up and Sophia walks back over to me.

"Mommy, you leave?" She pouts and my heart sinks. I hate leaving her.

I got the idea for my book, soon after Sophia was born. I came over to my mom's house for a regular visit and she was redoing my room for Sophia. She came across my old book of writings and gave it to me. Ashley and I looked through it that night, and the next day I started on the book.

"Yes baby girl, mommy has to leave now." I pick her up in my arms and she buries her face in my neck. Don't cry Spencer, don't do it. "But I'll be back to take you home later."

"Ok Mommy." She kisses my cheek and buries her face in my neck again. I love this girl so much.

I walk down the stairs with Sophia attached to me. My dad had to distract Sophia when I finally walked out of the door. I really hate leaving her.

"I just sent a text to Chelsea telling her that we are on our way." Kendra tells me once I get into the car.

Chelsea and Carmen also went to UCLA because of the Fine Arts program there. It was nice having all of my friends so close to me.

"Thank you." I reply while still looking at the house as we pull off. "Have you heard from Ivy yet?"

"Yes, she's already there." I nod. "And please don't try anything this time." Kendra adds.

"I have no idea what you are talking about." I say innocently and she just gives me that 'are you fucking kidding me look.' "Ok fine, but I just want you to be happy. You two belong together."

"I'm fine. Did I ever tell you that I wasn't happy?" Kendra focuses her full attention on me. I guess I hit a nerve or something.

"No, but the last time I saw you truly happy was when you were with her." I shrug and take out my phone to check for any missed messages. "Every time you date someone new, you break up with them for some ridiculous reason or another."

I'm not surprised when I only find emails from fans and my publishing company, none from Ashley, unfortunately. I know I shouldn't expect any but I can't help it.

"Spencer that was ten years ago, we were in high school for God's sake!" Kendra exclaims. "Things change, people change." She nearly whispers. I exit the email and stare at my background picture of me, Sophia, and Ashley. It was taken the night before she left.

"But sometimes feelings stay the same." I say still looking at my phone. Kendra opens her mouth to say something before closing it and turning to look out of the window.

I spend the rest of the car ride going through my phone looking at old pictures and text messages from Ashley.

"We're here" Just as Kendra says that, the door opens and I slide out of the car.

"Spencer!" I put the phone in my pocket just in time to see Chelsea walking towards me. I am soon wrapped in a hug. "Thank you for coming!" She nearly yells into my ear.

"Are you kidding? I wouldn't dream of missing this." I pull out of the hug and look around the art gallery. There are amazing paintings and drawings spread out on the walls and nice sculptures in the center of the room. "Chelsea this place looks amazing."

"Thank you! Carmen and I spent weeks just trying to come up with a design that fit our tastes." She then starts looking around the gallery. "Speaking of Carmen, she's around here somewhere." Chelsea takes off to greet Kendra and some other guests.

I walk around the gallery and start looking at the some of the art pieces. I get to one that makes me stop and laugh. It's a painting of a person that half man and half woman. This is the painting that I thought Chelsea would be working on the day that I caught her and Carmen making out for the first time.

"What's so funny about the painting?" I hear a voice say from behind me. I turn around and see Carmen with her arms folded over her chest.

"I was just thinking about the time I caught you and Chelsea making out in the art room." I struggle through giggles.

"Ahh the good ol' days." She says looking off into space. "If you would not have rudely interrupted, I would have probably gotten to second base." She sticks her tongue out at me and I roll my eyes.

"Well I'm glad I interrupted when I did then" She shakes her head and we laugh.

"Come here" And in a second I'm in her arms. "I've missed you!"

"I've missed you too. The past few months have been crazy for all of us but everything we've ever dreamed of is coming true."

"Spencer Carlin, is that you?" The only person I know with that strong southern accent that would be here in L.A. is Ivy.

"Ivy oh my gosh, it's been so long!" And she becomes the third person that I hug in less than an hour. It's like a little reunion right now. "How was touring with Beyoncé?"

"It was amazing! I love watching them perform my moves in front of thousands of people each night."

"I'm glad you had fun, but I'm really happy that you're back. How long are you back for?" We each take a drink off of the trays from one of the servers who are walking around.

"I don't know. I've been touring around for years with different artists. I hate constantly being on the move. I like being able to come back home to a girlfriend and being able to wake up to someone in the morning, ya know?" As she says this, I notice that her eyes seem to have found Kendra in the crowd.

"Then go tell her that. I'm not the one that can help you with that." I tell Ivy.

"She doesn't want me anymore, not after what I've put her through over the years." I just look at her and back at Kendra who is trying her hardest not to look over here. "I mean every time I would come back we'd get back together and then I'd leave again. I've hurt her so much already."

"Just go talk to her, you will never know what will happen if you don't." I slightly push her in Kendra's direction.

"Playing match maker again?" I turn around and see two of the last people I expect to see.

"Glen? Aiden? What are you two doing here? I thought you wouldn't be able to make it." I give them each a hug and a kiss on the cheek. They're supposed to be in Santa Monica because they were fixing up their house.

"We weren't going to come but the contractors had to reschedule so we thought we'd show up." Glen says. He has grown up a lot over the years. "How's my niece doing?"

"Good, I wish I could have brought her here. I hate leaving her." I take a sip of my champagne. "She misses her Uncle Gwen." I tease him. He hates that Sophia calls him Gwen because she has a hard time saying Glen. It's funny though because she can say words that have l's in it perfectly, all expect Glen.

"Ha ha very funny. Every time I see her I tell her to say Glen over and over but it always fails." He shakes his head with a smile on his face.

"Aww babe, it's not that bad." Aiden kisses Glen's cheek and I notice the pink blush that covers Glen's face.

Glen scoffs. "You're only saying that because she calls you Den Den, which is not as bad as Gwen." He pouts.

"I should record this so that your team can see how much of a pansy their coach really is." Glen always tries to act tough in front of his team, but he is a big softy.

"Whatever!" He stomps off into the crowd.

"Now I'm going to have to go fix that." Aiden says to me with a playful smile on his face.

"He'll get over it." I just shrug and take another sip of my champagne. "Anyway, how's life with the Lakers?"

"Oh you know the routine, practice, practice, game, practice." He says with a smile. "But I'm just glad to be back in L.A. Michigan just wasn't the place for me."

Aiden was drafted to the Pistons straight out of college. When he moved to Michigan, Glen was right behind him. Everyone was upset about them leaving, but we knew that no one could do or say anything to make them stay. They were living their dream.

However, we were more than pleased when Aiden was traded to the Lakers a few years ago. It was nice having them close by again. Ashley was eight months pregnant with Sophia when we went to his first Lakers game. I smile thinking of that day.

"Spencer!" I snap my eyes up to Aiden and give him a sad smile. He knows how I feel. He's one of the few people I can talk to about Ashley. He understands. "Where'd you go?"

"I was just thinking about when Ashley was pregnant with Sophia." He nods knowingly. I down the rest of my champagne and put the empty glass on one of the passing servers' trays.

"Hey babe, come look at this portrait Carmen drew of me!" Glen yells from half way across the room.

Aiden looks at me apologetically. "I'm sorry I have to…" He points in Glen's direction and I nod. He turns to leave but then stops suddenly. He digs into his pocket and hands me a phone. I just give him a confused look. "Before Ashley left, she told me to give this to you tonight."

I take the phone from him and he walks away. I just stare at the phone. What the hell am I supposed to do with it?

I try turning it on but its password protected. How does she expect me to get on it without giving me the password?

I try my birthday, her birthday, Sophia's birthday, our wedding anniversary, but none of them worked. After trying random number codes such as one, one, one, one, and one, two, three, four, I almost wanted to give up, but I didn't.

I mean its Ashley we're talking about, there has to be a great reason as to why she wanted me to have this. Ever since we met Ashley has been full of surprises. Then it hits me, when we first met! I quickly type in that password and score one for Spencer Carlin-Davies. That's a mouthful, isn't it?

As soon as it unlocks there is already an app up. When I noticed that it was the Gay Dating app where we first started talking, I'm not surprised that she chose that password for the phone.

I haven't used this app in years so I'm a little relieved to have remembered my password.

I quickly look around to see where everyone else is. I notice Glen standing by Aiden as he signs some autographs. Chelsea and Carmen are on opposite ends of the room and they seem to be describing some of the art pieces to different people. And I laugh when I noticed that Ivy and Kendra seem to have gravitated towards each other and are now hiding out in a corner. I have no doubt in my mind that they will be together by the end of the night.

Looking at all of my friends and their partners, makes me realize how lonely I really am.

My tears are only stopped because I get distracted by the vibrations in my hand.

**LAbabe4u**: Have I told you how proud of you I am?

I grin and type back.

**SLC823:** You may have once or twice.

**Lababe4u:** Well I'm telling you again, I'm so proud of you. You were amazing at your reading.

How does she know?

**SLC823:** You weren't there, so how would you know?

**LAbabe4u:** I cannot tell my secrets.

**SLC823:** Keeping secrets doesn't make friends.

**Lababe4u:** Gayle and Oprah have been doing it for years and they still have lots of friends.

**SLC823:** But I'm sure they don't keep secrets from each other, do they Gayle?

**LAbabe4u:** Probably, Oprah could have been seeing Stedman on the side.

**SLC823:** Why would she want to do that when she had the magical tongue of Gayle?

I giggle at how quickly we fall into the roles of Oprah and Gayle even after so many years.

**Lababe4u:** Very true, my head between your legs would definitely keep you coming back for more.

Is it hot in here?

**SLC823:** I'm in a room filled with many people, none of whom are you. Please don't turn me on right now.

**LAbabe4u**: Oprah I promise when you get home, I will make it worth your while.

**SLC823:** How? You're not home.

**Lababe4u:** True, but there's always Skype ;)

I can feel a blush creep up on my face as I think about our previous Skype sessions.

**SLC823:** My hand is still sore from the signing, so I don't think I'll be doing much.

**LAbabe4u:** No worries there all you have to do is watch and I'm sure you'll be cumming in no time.

Welcome back, blush. Even after all of these years she still has a way to get to me.

**SLC823:** As amazing as that sounds, I would much rather have you here with me.

**LAbabe4u:** I will be soon. Only four days until you're in my arms again.

**SLC823:** I hope you don't plan on leaving anytime soon after that.

**LAbabe4u:** Nope, not if I can help it.

**SLC823:** Good because even if you tried, I wouldn't let you.

**LAbabe4u:** Oh yea? How would you stop me?

**SLC823:** I would handcuff you to the bed, but I think you'd like that too much.

I look at the phone and Ashley still hasn't responded.

**SLC823:** Are you in your happy place right now?

**LAbabe4u:** I'm in a meeting; you're not supposed to be turning me on.

**SLC823:** You started it :p

**LAbabe4u:** I did not st…whatever!

**SLC823:** Give it up Gayle, I always win.

**LAbabe4u:** Only because I let you.

"Spencer!" I jump and put the phone in my bag. I look up and see Chelsea walking towards me.

"Hey Chels, this place is amazing!" I really haven't been looking around too much but from what I've seen it really does look great.

"Is it so amazing that you are on Twitter telling your followers about it?" She raises her eyebrow at me and I just give her a confused look. "I mean that's the only reason why you would have your phone out right now, right?"

"Exactly! I just wanted to tell them what they were missing out on." I play along.

"Yea I'm sure. Let's go, it's speech time and I need you to be at the front." I follow her to the front of the room and watch as she joins Carmen on the makeshift stage.

**SLC823:** No you don't. Anyway I have to go, Chelsea is about to make her speech. I'll see you tonight?

**LAbabe4u:** Of course, I'm never late for our Skype dates. I love you.

**SLC823:** I love you too.

"Thank you everyone for being here today." Carmen starts out and everyone claps. "We are so glad that you were able to come and share one of the best nights of our lives." She says motioning between her and Chelsea.

"Yes, we've had this dream since high school. After going to college, studying in Paris, and getting married, we finally had the time, experience, and money to open up our own Art Gallery." Chelsea adds before squeezing Carmen's hand. "And we could not have done this without our friends." She looks in my direction and I turn around and notice that Glen, Aiden, Ivy, and Kendra are standing somewhat behind me. "Most importantly, I'd like to thank my best friend Spencer Carlin." I smile at her. "She has been my best friend for years. She has been by my side when I told her countless number of times that I just wanted to quit because so many people have put me down for wanting to be an artist. Without her, I probably would not be standing here today accomplishing one of my biggest goals. So thank you, Spencer Carlin for being the best friend a girl could ask for." The crowd claps and I mouth a 'you're welcome' to Chelsea.

As the night went on, I actually went around and looked at some of the art pieces. I rarely had any time alone so I couldn't IM Ashley. When it was close to eight, people started leaving and I was able to have some free time. I do wish Ashley were here with me.

**SLC823:** I'm incredibly lucky to have you baby.

I think it's for me to leave. I'm getting really emotional and if I want to be home in time for my Skype date with Ashley I should leave soon.

**LAbabe4u:** I might have to disagree with you.

I question her IM as I look around for everyone else. I say my good byes to Carmen, Chelsea, Glen, and Aiden telling them that I'd see them next Saturday for our weekly get together. Now all I have to do is find Kendra so we can leave.

**LAbabe4u:** I'm definitely the lucky one in this relationship.

I smile at the phone. I love her so much. I couldn't picture myself with anyone else.

**SLC823: **Let's just say that we are lucky to have found each other.

I spot Kendra in the corner making out with Ivy. I guess it's safe to say that I will be leaving without her tonight. I send her a quick text telling her that I was leaving and wishing her good luck for whatever happens with Ivy.

When I get outside to the car, Charles is already there holding the door open for me.

"Thanks Charles, you are amazing at what you do." I give him a bright smile.

"Thank you, Ms. Spencer." No matter how many times I tell him to just call me just Spencer, he never does.

I slide in the car and get one of the best surprises of my life.

"I would say that I was pretty lucky just for the fact that I get to see you in that dress." She looks at me up and down and licks her lips. I'm wearing a tight fitting strapless blue dress that stops a few inches above my knees. "At first I wasn't too happy when I saw that you wore it to your book reading, but now that I can see it up close…man I'm lucky!" She grins at me.

"I…you…how…why?" I can't even get a coherent thought to come out.

"You did look amazing up there though. I have to admit, repeating that night through your words definitely brought tears to my eyes too." She moves a bit closer to me. "But you know which part you should have read?" She takes her finger and runs it from my knee and up thigh.

I know exactly which part of the book she's talking about. If I had a choice I would have read that part, but because of the content, I had to read something more of the PG-13 nature.

"_Spencer over here!" I look to my left and see Kendra running down the court. The girl that's defending me has been all over me this entire game. _

_I fake a shot and quickly throw the ball towards Kendra. Before anyone from the other team could even get to her, the ball was going through the net. Yes!_

"_That was Kendra Wilson scoring a total of twelve points so far tonight and Spencer Carlin with her fifth assist. King high's score is now at fifty-three and Central high is at fifty. With two minutes left in the game, Central can still make a comeback." The announcer screams into the microphone._

_I give Kendra a fist bump as we run down the court. We have become sort of a small team within our team._

_Phillips is running down the court pointing and shouting plays out to her teammates. Phillips can play any team by herself, this girl is a beast. I am glad that I'm not defending her. I do feel bad for Jessica though._

_As she gets closer, I start guarding my player. She just dribbles the ball to kill some time, and then Phillips fakes a shot then use a crossover on Jessica. She takes a step back then shoots a three. _

"_That's a three pointer for Carrie Phillips. Fifty-three all!" The crowd goes wild. Shit, shit, shit!_

_There's a minute and a half left of the final quarter. Jessica takes the ball down the court and she dribbles it, again to kill some time. She then passes it to Caitlin who goes for the layup but then misses by a few inches. _

_Damnit! I start jogging back down the court when the other team makes the rebound. One minute left in the game. Sixty seconds. _

"_Defense!" I hear the crowd chant over and over. I look into the audience and smile at my parents. I'm so happy that they are both here supporting me. Glen and Aiden are sitting right next to them. Aiden gives me a smile, but Glen looks like he is more nervous than I am. _

_My gaze shifts to the cheerleaders, one cheerleader to be exact, my cheerleader. She smiles and waves at me with her pom pom. God she is so god damn sexy. _

_While I was ogling my girlfriend, Phillips managed to score again. _

"_Fify-five Central! With only twenty five seconds left in the game, King's only chance may be scoring a three pointer."_

_I need to focus. Jessica runs the ball down the court. Everyone is heavily defended, no one is open. I make a decision to try to win this game for us. I run behind Jessica and she passes me the ball. _

_I dribble the ball, and look for an open route. I run around, trying to escape my defender with no luck. I look at the clock and there is ten seconds left. Acting fast, I quickly jump up for the three._

_I watch in slow motion, at least that's what it feels like, as the ball soars in the air to the hoop. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest. The buzzer echoing off the walls sounds like a siren screaming through my ears. _

"_The California high school championship is won by the King High Cobra's!" The announcer shouts excitedly and the crowd is up on their feet cheering. _

_I'm still in shock. I can't believe I just made the winning shot for the state championship. I'm still standing in the same spot that I made the shot in and I'm staring at the hoop. Unbelievable. _

"_Baby you did it!" And suddenly Ashley has her arms around my neck and her legs around my waist. Acting on instinct, I wrap my arms around her back to support her. "I love you so much!" And then she does something that surprises the shit out of me. _

_Right in front of the entire audience, she kisses me. Not on my cheek, or my forehead, no, directly on my lips. Who am I to deny a kiss from Ashley?_

_A few seconds after kissing Ashley, I feel pats on my back and yells of Congratulations. Ashley hops down, kisses my cheek, and runs back over to the cheerleaders. I look at her in shock. _

_I stare until I feel myself being lifted into the air, while simultaneously having the championship trophy shoved in my hand. _

_Looking into the audience, I can see my family and Aiden on their feet cheering loudly with the rest of crowd. I raise the trophy in their direction and they clap more. I look down and blow a kiss to Ashley and she blows one back. To her right, I notice Kendra and Ivy making out, what's new?_

_We cheer for a good half hour after the game ends. Some of the teammates invited me to a celebration party, but all I wanted to was spend some alone time with Ashley. I know that tonight was big for her, she just came out to pretty much the entire school because I'm sure once Monday comes around, everyone will know and there will be pictures to prove it._

_I was treated to a dinner by my parents. I wasn't surprised when my mom invited Ashley along, she has been trying to get to know her, and I'm grateful for that._

_After the dinner, I found myself sitting on Ashley's bed. We usually spend some time here when we need to be alone or when we want to have loud crazy sex because no one is ever here._

"_I can't believe you did that tonight." I tell her as we rest comfortably on her bed. She is lying halfway on top of me with her arm and leg resting across me._

"_Me either." She admits._

"_What made you do it?"_

_I feel her shrug. "I don't know. I was in the moment, and I was just so happy and proud of you. I know how much you were worried about that game, and you ended up winning it for the team." She kisses my cheek and I smile. She starts trailing her kisses down to my neck. _

"_I-I"I clear my throat. I can feel her smile against my neck but she still continues her licking and sucking on my neck. "I'm p-proud of y-you too!" I struggle to get out. "Mmm, that feels good." She always knows how to turn me on instantly._

_But then she surprises me and hops up off of the bed completely. Before I can complain, she starts talking._

"_So we should make this interesting, rather than just going straight for the goods." I smile at her words but give her a confused look. _

"_What are you talking about?" I sit at the edge of the bed, making my feet hang off._

_She walks over and picks up her empty trash can and moves it in front of her door. _

"_We should play a little game of Strip basketball." Damn I love this woman. "Since we each have on four pieces of clothing, game is four."_

_I have on a pair of basketball shorts over my underwear and a sports bra, and I'm guessing she is counting socks as one. Looking at her, I can see that she has on a tank top over her bra, some shorts, and some socks. Wait isn't she wearing…oh my god she doesn't have any underwear on!_

_My eyes shoot to hers and she smirks._

_I stand up and walk towards her. She hands me some balled up socks. _

"_Since you're the champion, you can go first." Oh this should be easy._

_I take the ball from her "Do you want me to go easy on you?" Her only response is to roll her eyes._

_My first thought is to just fake her out the entire time. I fake the left but go right, but it's not that easy with her, she's fast. She reaches out and squeezes my boob, I drop the sock ball out of shock, and she picks it up and easily scores. _

"_One zip, baby!" She taunts. I open my mouth to object but I have no words, so I just take off my socks._

_Ashley is definitely a cheater. I don't think I've been groped so many times in my life. But I do have to say that Ashley's wandering hands have made me very wet. _

"_Maybe I should have gone easy on you." She slaps my ass. My underwear is the only thing I have left on. She still has on her bra and shorts. I can't wait to see what's underneath them._

"_Game's not over yet." The banter continues. Ashley is definitely a trash talker. I take the ball from her and she presses her body directly on me. She is defending me from behind and I can feel her hard nipples pressing against my back. I think she's doing that on purpose and it only temporary makes me forget my goal, but helps me remember a different goal: getting Ashley naked. I crossover to the other side and quickly throw the balled up socks into the trashcan._

"_Damn!" She screams._

"_Looks like the score is all tied up. Time to strip baby." I tease. She shakes her head and takes off her bra. _

_I think I'm having one of those in my head slow motion moments. Her hands slowly reach behind her and one by one I watch as each nipple comes into my view. After discarding her bra, she struts over to the trash can to get the socks. I lick my lips as she bends down to pick up the socks. That is all mine. _

"_This will be my last shot, and I will w-" Her words are cut off by my lips. I walk her backwards so that her back is pressed up against the door. I press my body up against her's and I moan as our skin makes contact. _

_I run my tongue along her bottom lip and she parts her lips slightly to grant me access to her tongue. I love the way her tongue tastes. I dance my fingers along her sides and by the way she is moaning and bucking her hips, I can tell that it's turning her on._

_I stop my fingers at her breast and palm her nipples. "S- Spence…" Her back arches forcing her breast more into my hand. I take two fingers and tweak her nipple to its peak before moving to the next one. "Ohh yes" I love her moans. _

"_I love your body." I whisper on her lips. I peck them slightly then kiss my way to her neck and run my lips over her collarbone. I continue my way down and stop when I reach her harden nipples. I take one lick on one of her nipples and she groans. I slightly bite it and soothe it over with my tongue. My tongue moves up and down, left to right, and in circles, she moans and groans and run her fingers through my hair. The moment my lips and tongue wrap around her hard nipple she pushes my head more into her. "Mmm" I moan into her. _

_I do the same to other nipple and by this point, I'm sure she's soaked. I take both of my hands and start tweaking her nipples. I lean up for a quick kiss before kissing and licking down her body again until I'm on my knees in front of her. I spend a little more time when I get to her abs because I have a minor obsession with them. With my hands still on her nipples, I use my teeth to pull down her shorts. She uses her legs to kick them the rest of the way down._

_I've reached my goal. I can see her glistening from her here. I can smell my goal. I lick my lips before diving in. _

_First I kiss and lick her thighs; I need for her to want it. Taking my time, I kiss her slowly on her wet lips. "You taste amazing" I mumble through kisses. I take one long lick from the back to the front of her slit. I look up at her and her head hits the back of the door. I smirk and continue my rubbing of her nipples and licking of her slit. I can taste her get wetter and wetter with each stroke of my tongue._

"_Please" I've been purposely avoiding her clit. I wanted her to beg for it. I love when she begs. She tries to buck her hips but I move back every time she does. "Gosh Spence please" She groans out again. I decide to put her out of her misery and slowly wrap my lips around her clit. "Oh fuck!" I'm glad no one's here because that was loud. _

_She's moaning loud and with every moan she bucks into my face. It's hard to keep up with her. I try to move my hand to hold her down but she stills my hands on her nipples. Usually at this time I would use my fingers to give her some added pleasure but right now I think she wants a complete clitoral orgasm, which I would be more than happy to give her._

_Every time she looks down at me, I look up at her and we make eye contact. Every time we make eye contact, I feel wetness seep out of her. Moving my fingers from her nipples, I grab her breasts and squeeze them slowly. My hands sensually massage her breasts and she loves it. Her hands find the back of my head again and she forcefully pulls me more into her. My tongue swims around her wet center. I lick, suck, and nip her clit. I'm pretty sure she is close right now. "I'm gonna cum," see. I start tweaking her nipples, and surprise her as I plunge my tongue into her whole. "Oh fuck Spencccerrr!" She cums all over my mouth, but I don't stop my movements on her center until she has to forcefully push my head away from her. She pulls me up and kisses me on my lips. She loves tasting herself on my lips. "Fuck that was good." She rests her head on my shoulder. I smirk at the fact that I can wear her out._

"_Just good?" _

_She lifts her head up and looks me in my eyes. "I'll show you just how good it felt." The next thing I know I'm being pushed backwards towards the bed. "Your turn." Hell yes!_

That night was amazing. Ashley was finally out and we had amazing sex, what more could I ask for?

After that night, we no longer had to hide in school. I won't lie and say that everyone accepted us easily, but it wasn't as hard as I had thought it would be. There were a few people that whispered dyke and other stereotypical names as we walked through the halls. And then there was Madison.

Madison of course was a bitch towards us. She tried to round up some of the cheerleaders to get Ashley kicked off the cheerleading squad. In the end, she couldn't get enough of the girls to back her up and Ashley ended up cutting her from the squad.

I didn't know why Madison hated Ashley being a lesbian. There was a rumor going around which stated that she was in love with Ashley. Both Ashley and I found that hard to believe, until she tried to kiss Ashley.

She showed up one day after a regularly scheduled cheerleading practice. She knew that Ashley would be there putting everything away and waiting for everyone else to leave. She came in suspiciously right after the last person had left, and made the moves on Ashley.

When Ashley told me that, I was pretty pissed but after some convincing and kissing, I forgot about kicking Madison's ass, for the most part.

"Where's that head of yours?" She whispers against my neck.

"Madison." She lifts her head up and gives me a weird look.

"I haven't heard that name in years."

"I was just thinking about how she tried to kiss you after giving you shit about liking girls." I stroke her hair when she puts her head back down. "I was definitely surprised." She mumbles something against my skin. Running my fingers through her hair always makes Ashley tired. "Speaking of surprises" I pause and kiss her forehead. "Getting that phone from Aiden was definitely a nice surprise."

And she's suddenly wide awake.

"There was a point to that." And she's nervous. "I uh…we…"

I sit up fully. "What's wrong baby?"

"I was trying to figure out how to tell you something, you know lessen the blow by distracting you in a way." Her eyes are shifting all through the backseat of the car.

"Lessen the blow to tell me what?"

She opens her mouth but then shuts it quickly. Before I can say anything she moves back over to where she was sitting when I came in. She fumbles through her purse and takes out her phone. I just stare at her with a confused look until my phone goes off, well the phone that she gave me.

**LAbabe4u: **Tell Stedman he needs to pack his things cause we need to make room for one more.

I stare at the phone. What in the world does th...oh my god! I look up at her and I'm sure my eyes are sparkling.

"Ash…you're…you?" I point at her stomach.

"Spence, I'm pregnant. We're having another baby." She says through a forced smile. "I know that it's a bit of a surprise but it has happened. I went to the doctor to confirm it and everything." Ashley adds nervously.

The reason why this is probably hard for her to tell me was because we were not expecting to be pregnant this soon. When we were trying to have Sophia, we had many failed attempts before she was truly pregnant. We thought the same thing would happen when we tried again.

We decided to start earlier than we were actually ready. We are still working on our careers so that once the baby comes we would be able to stay at home to care for him or her.

Ashley finally achieved her dream of owning a record label soon after Sophia was born. She spent so much time at home with Sophia that she decided to do something productive. During Sophia's first year she stayed home and planned everything. She found a building, some workers, and some partners. During the next year she started scouting acts and she had her record label up and running.

Ashley wanted to have another baby. She said she didn't want Sophia to turn out like her, lonely in a home full of nannies, maids, and chefs. I told her that I would love another kid, but we would never neglect Sophia, like her parents had done to her. She agreed, but said that it would have helped having a sibling around. So the next day, we were at the clinic, hoping for the best.

Ashley was just in New York finishing up some deals and settling some final plans for her to leave for a while, which is why I was surprised to find her in my car when I got in.

"Yes it's a surprise, but I'm unbelievably happy that it has happened." I smile at her and she looks relieved. I grab her hand and pull her into me. "I can't wait to have another baby with you Ash." I start making slow circles on her stomach with my hand.

We decided that Ashley would be the one to have the kids because well to put it lightly, I didn't like the idea of pushing something the size of a huge ass watermelon out of something that's as tiny as an egg. Yea that just didn't work for me. Ashley wanted to because she said something about the miracle of child birth or something; personally I thought she was high at the time. Whatever it was that she was smoking, I stayed a hundred feet away from.

"I know it is happening sooner than we expected but at least we don't have to go through the pain and trials like we did last time. I don't think I could go through that again, and I know you can't." Ashley looks at me sadly. I notice that the car has stopped and we are now in front of my parents' house. I think Charles may have driven around for a bit because it doesn't take that long to get here. He is the greatest driver ever. "We dealt with that and we were able to get through it. We had each other for support and if anything happens we still have each other and a beautiful little girl who is currently missing her Momma." I kiss her lips lightly.

"I love you so much Spencer."

"I love you more than you know Ash." I notice her blush and kiss her cheek.

"Let's go get our girl." She says and I slide out of the car and hold my hand out for Ashley to take. Walking up to house door, I think about how lucky I am.

Who knew that curiously entering a lesbian chat room would lead me to my wife?

**Please tell me what you thought of not only this epilogue but the entire story. Reviews are always appreciated.**


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